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You might remember last year, when a talented artist combined Michael Vick and Barbaro, causing us to spontaneously combust. Well, that artist is back, this time honoring the "great" Eight Belles. More »
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Many of us have wondered why prolific message board poet Dee Mirich has remained silent on the tragic Eight Belles Kentucky Derby accident. After all, when Barbaro fell, you couldn't swing a dead cat without hitting one of her offerings. But now all is clear: Ms. Mirich had been working feverishly on her magnum opus; a poem that would resonate through the vast reaches of time, perfectlly capturing the mood of a nation. More »
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When future generations study the first decade of the 21st Century, the debate of course will turn to the Great Racehorse Protests of 2008. In the wake of the Eight Belles tragedy at the Kentucky Derby, PETA is bringing all guns to bear on the remaining Triple Crown events; planning protests at the Preakness Stakes in Baltimore next week and the Belmont Stakes in New York in June. Should be lots of fun, with counter-protesting and everything. Hey, wouldn't it be hilarious if we could somehow manage to run the OIympic Torch through those two locations as well? More »
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Backing the wrong horse is always deadly in politics, especially when it's an actual horse. Poor Hillary Clinton. How can someone get into trouble just betting on the Kentucky Derby? By making a huge deal about placing a bet on a horse that had to be destroyed right on the track, that's how. Now PETA is firing broadsides at her, as she wonders how she's going to carry a state — Indiana — in which Dee Mirich resides. More »
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Eight Belles is probably in Heaven by now, galloping in fields of clover on four sturdy legs and eating tasty apples. No, I'm not sure which friends she's romping about with up there (a safe bet; one of them is not Christopher Reeve). Down here on earth, though, things are quite unsettled. Who is to blame? Could the tragedy have been avoided? Does anyone know the whereabouts of Jeff Gillooly? More »
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The death of Eight Belles - the second place finisher in today's Kentucky Derby - makes it pretty difficult to get all that excited over Big Brown's dominating performance. The commentators love to speak of the beauty and humanity of these creatures, yet nobody seemed to mind celebrating before the filly's body could be removed from the track. Brian of Awful Announcing is one of many who profited off of the doomed horse's performance, and I bet they feel equally crappy inside. And I bet they'd feel a lot less crappy if they sent their winnings and betting slips to me, which is why I'm including my address at the end of this post. In real news, the Louisville Courier-Journal has the depressing details. More »
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