Yesterday was Woman Crush Wednesday on Twitter, so Seahawks quarterback Russell Wilson decided to offer an encomium to the light and love of his life, Ciara:
(As always when Russ tweets about Ciara, you should read all the replies. They never fail to be the most savage things you’ve ever seen in your life.)
What a sweet little note! Now I am convinced that Russell Wilson not some sort of uncanny-valley A.I. experiment, and is an actual human being with human thoughts and feelings.
GODDAMNIT, RUSS. You googled “How to describe a beautiful woman,” didn’t you? And copy-pasted from the first site that came up. Goddamnit.
Update: He did it again. Goddamnit!
Chaser, from the same damn website: