Greg Hardy’s sit-down interview with Adam Schefter aired on ESPN this afternoon, and Hardy managed to cram an unbelievable amount of circuitous gobbledygook into a relatively short amount of time.

For example, here’s Hardy refusing to get into any specifics about what went down the night he was arrested for beating Nicole Holder (via PFT):

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I don’t think I want to get into a situation like that. It’s in the past. I want to say that I’m an innocent man, I’ve been proven not guilty, and it’s a situation that’s in my past. And I feel like, as a grown man, as a football player of my caliber there are situations, inside that situation, where it has nothing to do with the situation, but I could have done better. I should have done better.

If you read “there are situations, inside that situation, where it has nothing to do with the situation” enough times, your brain will actually fall out of your head.

Things got even worse when Hardy was asked to explain the police photos from that night, which showed bruises all over Holder’s body:

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Like I said, that’s a conversation for lawyers. Pictures are pictures and they can be made to look like whatever they want to.

Good stuff.

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[PFT]