Hanley Ramirez Had A Real Shit Day At The Office Yesterday

Based on the box score from yesterday's game agains the Cardinals, it looks like Dodgers shortstop Hanley Ramirez had himself a perfectly fine game. He got on base four times in five at-bats, didn't strike out, and scored a run for his team. Lost in those numbers, though, is the fact that Ramirez twice got on base via an oh-God-I-just-shit-my-pants fastball hitting him right where it hurts.

In the top of the fourth inning, Ramirez came up to bat against Carlos Martinez, who throws as hard as anyone in the big leagues. On a 1-0 count, Martinez completely lost control of a 98 mph fastball and sent it sailing at Ramirez's head. Fortunately, Hanley was able to duck out of the way and take the ball on his shoulder. Still, fuck this:

I like to call that face Ramirez is making while sitting on the ground the "Cool, cool, I almost just died. Can I just go home now?" face.

To make matters worse, poor Ramirez had to deal with big-ass Matt Holiday, who was hit by Clayton Kershaw in the bottom half of the inning as retaliation, bearing down on him with a nasty takeout slide on a double play ball in the next half inning. That play ended up being one of the more enjoyable parts of Ramirez's night, though, considering what happened to him in the ninth.

On an 0-2 count, Cardinals closer Trevor Rosenthal, who also throws the ball harder than just about anyone, came high and tight with a 99 mph fastball that busted Hanley right on the wrist:

There's something like a zero percent chance that Hanley Ramirez's left arm is anything but completely non-functional today. Baseball, man. Why even do it?