Bill Simmons’s three-week suspension from ESPN ends on Wednesday, and there is already a lot of conjecture about how the suspension has affected his relationship with higher-ups at ESPN, and if he will stay with the network when his contract is up next year. He could stay at ESPN. He could go to Bleacher Report (NOTE: AHAHAHAHAHA) and, in the process, join Turner’s NBA team. He could start up his own thing with Kimmel and Carolla and J-Bug and HouseO and Big Suppy J and all his other cool Vegas buddybros. But there are other options out there for you, Bill … like here! COME WORK AT DEADSPIN, YOU SQUEAKY HIGH-PITCHED MOTHERFUCKER.
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