One thing Lorenzo Cain understands that big mashing goons like Aaron Judge and Bryce Harper still haven’t mastered with all their grotesque and gratuitous moonshots is the precision and understated majesty of the, umm, short ball:

MLB.com says this is the shortest dinger slugged (excluding inside the park jobs) since 2015. From what I can tell that 2015 dinger was a 317-foot shot off the bat of Caleb Joseph, once again wrapped around Pesky’s Pole, and apparently significantly aided by the wind. Cain’s was a full 15 feet shorter, and looked to be about as close to that dang pole as dingers can get. It will take true wizardry to shave those last few available inches if anyone wants to top Cain’s amazing dongito.