Deadspin: New England Patriots

A Thief Broke Into His SUV, So Chad Ochocinco Spent The Day Live-Tweeting The Aftermath

Dom Cosentino — Wed, 23 May 2012 18:15:00 EDT

Patriots receiver Chad Ochocinco has more than three million Twitter followers, in part because he often engages with some of them, usually by joking around. Some of it is look-at-me self-promotion, sure, but Ochocinco is sometimes capable of laughing at himself, too. More »

Wes Welker Drops The Contract Negotiations Have "Gotten Worse" Routine

Sean Newell — Sat, 19 May 2012 14:21:42 EDT

The Wes Welker contract negotiation is becoming a sticky situation. Earlier in the week, Welker let off some steam when he told reporters contract negotiations had gotten worse with the Patriots. The Patriots then leaked word that they were pissed with Welker for going public. Now Welker is saying it was all just poor word choice. More »

The Junior Seau 911 Call Is Harrowing

Timothy Burke — Fri, 04 May 2012 17:45:53 EDT

This is the 911 call made by Junior Seau's girlfriend Megan Noderer upon her finding his body. It's terrifying. Listen with caution. [TMZ] More »

The Night Junior Seau Picked Up A Marine Captain's Tab And Serenaded Bar Patrons With A Ukulele

Dom Cosentino — Thu, 03 May 2012 10:00:00 EDT

An email arrived this morning from Albert Flores Jr., a U.S. Marine Corps captain who lives in Sneads Ferry, N.C. It's about a chance encounter Flores had last year in a Southern California bar with Junior Seau, the former Chargers and Patriots linebacker who died yesterday of a suspected suicide. This is the email in its entirety, with slight edits made for publication: More »

Former NFL Linebacker Junior Seau Found Dead, Suicide Suspected [UPDATE]

Erik Malinowski — Wed, 02 May 2012 14:16:13 EDT

According to TMZ, there was a shooting at the Oceanside, California, home of former NFL linebacker Junior Seau. TMZ says that multiple sources have confirmed to them that Seau was found dead inside his home. Seau was 43 years old. More »

Eric Mangini Still Regrets His Involvement In That Whole Spygate Business, Still Hedges On Whether He Snitched

Dom Cosentino — Tue, 01 May 2012 19:45:00 EDT

This morning, Ravens coach John Harbaugh went on a Baltimore radio station to say that the Patriots' championships have "asterisks" and that those titles have been "stained" because of Spygate. It didn't take long for Harbaugh to issue a statement clarifying his remarks to say he was referring to "the perception out there" that continues to linger about the Patriots because of Spygate. And by listening to the actual audio of Harbaugh's initial comments, which were said in response to a question about cheating in general (you can hear them here, beginning at the three-minute mark), it does sound like that was the point he was trying to make. More »

US Navy Frees Eric Kettani To Play For The Patriots

Barry Petchesky — Thu, 26 Apr 2012 13:40:45 EDT

LTJG Eric Kettani can go back to being FB Eric Kettani. Yesterday, after three years of service on the USS Klakring, Kettani received his release from active duty and will join the New England Patriots for all offseason activities. More »

Now's Your Chance To Buy The House Rob Gronkowski Grew Up In

Dom Cosentino — Wed, 25 Apr 2012 19:20:00 EDT

The listing describes this "stately colonial" in the Buffalo, N.Y., suburb of Amherst as "fantastic and gracious." The house sits on 5.1 acres and has four bedrooms, three-and-a-half bathrooms, an oversized in-ground pool and hot tub, and tennis and basketball courts. But that's not all! A source tells us it's where Rob Gronkowski and his brothers lived with their parents after it was built in 2001. Asking price: $689,900. Yo soy fiesta, where it all began, and it can be all yours. [via] More »

Sage Steele Did Not Appreciate Steve Weissman Suggesting She Flirted With Wes Welker

Timothy Burke — Wed, 25 Apr 2012 13:15:00 EDT

As first noted over at Awful Announcing, things got a bit awkward yesterday at the tail end of the 3 p.m. SportsCenter on ESPNNEWS when Steve Weissman joked that there was flirting between fellow anchor Sage Steele and Patriots wide receiver Wes Welker, who was doing the Bristol media tour Tuesday. More »

Extra, Extra! Read All About It: Tom Brady Dressed Liked A Weirdo

Sean Newell — Sun, 22 Apr 2012 15:30:00 EDT

Tom Brady was at the grand opening for some clotheshorse boutique in Boston this weekend with Gisele and posed for this picture with the shop owner. Evidently, he decided to use his wardrobe to pay homage to his old job. More »

Oh, Why Not? Here's Rob Gronkowski Dancing And Singing Along To LMFAO

Dom Cosentino — Tue, 17 Apr 2012 18:25:00 EDT

The Offseason of Gronk made it to Playboy Golf a couple of weeks back. Gronk's the one in the shades with the Zubaz pants and the matching Zubaz headband. Hope that clears up any confusion. More »

History Lesson: The Time Matt Millen Punched The Patriots' General Manager In The Head

Sean Newell — Sat, 14 Apr 2012 12:05:00 EDT

A semi-regular feature in which we recall notable incidents that we would've covered the hell out of had we existed at the time. More »

Rob Gronkowski Plays "Fuck, Marry, Kill" For Rex Ryan, Betty White, And Tim Tebow

Barry Petchesky — Fri, 13 Apr 2012 09:10:00 EDT

The Rob Gronkowski Magical Mystery Tour rolled into URI last night, and as with all university speakers, "Fuck, Marry, Kill" was played. Gronk's (partial) answer: "I would F Tebow, the kid(?), take his virginity." The bro near the camera finds it hilarious. [via Jimmy Traina] More »

Rob Gronkowski Filmed Himself Spiking A Megatron Doll In His House

Jack Dickey — Mon, 09 Apr 2012 12:10:00 EDT

Ordinarily we have a do-not-treat-"viral"-advertising-like-it-is-news policy. But according to the official hierarchy of Deadspin editorial policies, the everything-even-tangentially-involving-Rob-Gronkowski-is-news policy trumps the one I mentioned in the last sentence. More »

Here Is A Photo Of Rob Gronkowski Lying On A Bed With Some Cats

Dom Cosentino — Fri, 06 Apr 2012 12:45:00 EDT

And it was sent to us by a reader who asked us not to use his name. That reader also passed along a little story to provide some context: More »

The Rob Gronkowski Magical Mystery Tour Stopped At A Dunkin' Donuts Today

Erik Malinowski — Tue, 27 Mar 2012 20:15:00 EDT

Aruban travel guide Rob Gronkowski continued his post-Spring Break whirlwind today by stopping off at a Dunkin' Donuts near Gillette Stadium to celebrate the two-year sponsorship deal he signed with the omnipresent global donut conglomerate. This customer, in particular, was super-gronked to see Gronk because she has a puppy at home named Gronk. (Seriously, I gronk you not.) More »

Rob Gronkowski Is Now Partying For Charity

Dom Cosentino — Tue, 27 Mar 2012 18:45:00 EDT

The stated mission of the Celebrities for Charity is pretty straightforward: "To unite the goodwill of celebrities with the generosity of their fans to assist people in need." Its list of past beneficiaries includes schools, hospices, and cancer foundations. As we learned last week, Rob Gronkowski is nothing if not generous. Which is why he's helping out the only way he knows how: By raffling off the opportunity to party with him at a Bruins game. Oh, and it's called—in all seriousness—the Boston Gronk Party. More »

Rob Gronkowski's Public Relations Team's Official Response To Our Spring Break Photos And That Story About The 16-Year-Old

Jack Dickey — Fri, 23 Mar 2012 14:20:00 EDT

Rob Gronkowski's official (unsolicited) comment, presented without comment: More »

More Rob Gronkowski At Spring Break: Still Wearing Zubaz, Still Drinking, Still On Crutches

Dom Cosentino — Thu, 22 Mar 2012 20:00:00 EDT

Tipsters just keep sending us their stories and photos of Gronk's epic Spring Break party tour, so we're just gonna keep posting them. The pair of photos we have here came to us from the gang at Shot of Ginn. The image of Gronk shirtless and in Zubaz pants was said to be taken yesterday in South Padre Island, Texas, which is also where that shot we showed you earlier of Gronk with a beer bong was taken. The photo down below of Gronk on crutches but still holding a drink was reportedly taken sometime last week in Miami, though since we also know Gronk was recently in Aruba, we can't verify that's where it took place. More »

Rob Gronkowski's Offseason Is Becoming One Giant Swig From A Beer Bong

Dom Cosentino — Thu, 22 Mar 2012 10:25:00 EDT

Having already made the party rounds in Aruba—where he may or may not have hooked up with a 16-year-old girl—Rob Gronkowski has apparently moved on to South Padre Island, Texas. At least, that's where we think he was when this photo of a funneling Gronk was tweeted at Adam Schefter sometime last night, where it was first discovered by those scuzzy sleuths over at Busted Coverage. More »

Did A 16-Year-Old Mass. Lass Hook Up With Rob Gronkowski One Steamy Night In Aruba?

Jack Dickey — Mon, 19 Mar 2012 11:35:59 EDT

According to the filthy minds at Busted Coverage, a young woman from Scituate, Mass. recently tweeted thusly about a Gronkquest: More »

Sterling Moore Makes A Funny, Scares Crap Out Of Agent

Barry Petchesky — Mon, 12 Mar 2012 18:20:15 EDT

Sterling Moore is a cornerback for the New England Patriots, and as it is the offseason, Sterling Moore went to Las Vegas. Sterling Moore had a fun time in Vegas, as athletes and non-athletes often do. Perhaps there was gambling, maybe women or alcohol, or even Cirque Du Soleil. Whatever his recreation of choice, Sterling Moore wanted to get across the notion that he had a fun time but was also tired. More »

Randy Moss Announces He'd Like To Play Football Again In Saddest Videoconference Ever

Dom Cosentino — Mon, 13 Feb 2012 19:00:52 EST

Football's chattering classes today have been busy dissecting Randy Moss's decision to (try to) return to the NFL at age 35. Moss has been away from the game for a year and a half, and all of the questions about him will certainly get answered in due time. The more pressing matter, though, might be the way in which Moss let the world know he planned to (try to) make a comeback: with a live stream on the Internet that was reportedly seen by just 200 people. More »

This Is What Tom Brady Looked Like As The Lion From The Wizard Of Oz In The 8th Grade

Dom Cosentino — Sat, 11 Feb 2012 14:00:00 EST

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And Sandy painted his face. Aw. [via; h/t to thesallydrapers] More »

Él Es Fiesta: Sterling Moore Went To IHOP Just Two Days After Losing The Super Bowl

Barry Petchesky — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 16:45:07 EST

This soon after a heartbreaking loss, It is an insult to every long-suffering fan for a player to go to a reasonably priced national chain. Perhaps Moore should be spending a little more time thinking about what more he could have done to help his team on Super Bowl Sunday, and a little less time eating pancakes. [Instagram] More »

Boston Glee Party: Brandon Spikes Is Joking Around With Fans Just Five Days After Losing The Super Bowl

Barry Petchesky — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 16:20:29 EST

Just another example of professional athletes not knowing the proper way to act after a loss, as established by Rodney Harrison. Perhaps Spikes should be spending a little more time thinking about what more he could have done to help his team on Super Bowl Sunday, and a little less time "grinch smiling." [Twitter] More »

Sunshine Patriot: Chad Ochocinco Sure Looks Happy Just Five Days After Losing The Super Bowl

Barry Petchesky — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 15:35:12 EST

The fun police have been alerted, and Rodney Harrison is en route. Perhaps Ochocinco should be spending a little more time thinking about what more he could have done to help his team on Super Bowl Sunday, and a little less time smiling. [Twitter] More »

How Dare Bill Belichick Golf Pebble Beach Just Four Days After Losing The Super Bowl

Barry Petchesky — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 16:05:07 EST

Nah, not really. That would be an absurd argument to make, just about as absurd as decreeing Rob Gronkowski and Matt Light can't go party in Indianapolis. It's a slippery slope. How many days after a big loss is it acceptable to have fun? Is a sedate sport like golf more palatable than dancing? How about frolf? [Twitter] More »

Rodney Harrison Is An Idiot. Let Rob Gronkowski Dance!

Drew Magary — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 13:41:40 EST

You may have seen this video of Pats tight end Rob Gronkowski and tackle Matt Light, fresh off of losing the Super Bowl, doing what I would be probably be doing if I just lost the biggest game of my life: getting shitfaced, dancing shirtless, and trying to get laid. But of course, Rodney Harrison doesn't approve of such nonsense: More »

Shirtless Matt Light Also Has An Onstage Dance Video

Luke O'Brien — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 14:40:33 EST

Yawn. Do something better than that, Light. Glowsticks exist for a reason. More »

Math Says If Wes Welker Catches That Ball, The Patriots Win

Brian Burke — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 14:06:21 EST

We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries. More »

Wes Welker Mocked With Pile Of Butterfinger Candy Bars In Boston Town Square

Dom Cosentino — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 14:05:00 EST

It was a marketing trick by an online pawnshop, and not any sort of additional commentary from Gisele. [BostInno; photo via Megan Marrs] More »

A Rob Gronkowski Onstage Dance Video Has Been Unearthed

Luke O'Brien — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 11:35:53 EST

After seeing this video, I'm convinced that Rob Gronkowski's ankle is hurt much worse than anyone realized. It's the only explanation for why he'd be dancing like this. More »

"Was That A Sasquatch?” The Misery Of Watching Canadian Super Bowl Ads

Matthew Black — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 10:50:54 EST

Rob Gronkowski Post-Super Bowl Dance Videos Begin To Surface

Luke O'Brien — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 10:41:16 EST

Yesterday we published photos of Rob Gronkowski and Matt Light mourning their Super Bowl loss by dancing shirtless onstage to LMFAO at the Patriots post-game party. Today brings video, supposedly, of Gronkowski warming up his gimpy ankle before taking the stage with LMFAO. It comes to us from Barstool Sports. More »

Rob Gronkowski, Shirtless Matt Light Danced Away Their Sorrows After The Super Bowl

Luke O'Brien — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 14:55:54 EST

Ever wonder what the losers do after the big game? Well, some sulk in hotel rooms. Others cry in their beer. And some dance. They dance like no one's watching, even when someone is watching, which is what many people were doing last night as Matt Light took off his shirt and started to boogie, according to the friend of one guy who was watching: More »

Did The Giants Put 12 Men On The Field On Purpose For Brady's First Hail Mary?

Barry Petchesky — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 13:38:00 EST

Patriots Linebacker Brandon Spikes Is Probably Taking The Super Bowl Loss A Little Too Hard

Jack Dickey — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 13:25:59 EST

C'mon, man, you won two national titles in college. And you might just have some more opportunities. Act like you've been there before. More »

"My Husband Can Not Fucking Throw The Ball And Catch The Ball At The Same Time": Gisele Is Pissed At The Patriots' Dropped Passes

Barry Petchesky — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 10:30:00 EST

This morning, the Patriots are talking dropped passes. Aaron Hernandez had one, Deion Branch had one, but most visibly, Wes Welker was hit in the hands on a long pass that would have extended the Patriots drive with four minutes left. It wasn't the best throw, but it was catchable, and after the game Tom Brady put it was gently as he could: "missed opportunities." More »

The Ballsiest Call In Super Bowl History

Brian Burke — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 08:30:41 EST