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Lost in the madness of the actual game was this female fan and her loyalty, dedication and love for Baylor football. At great personal risk, she swung her way across the field to take part in celebrating Baylor's stunning upset of Oklahoma. It must have been exhilarating for her and everyone else who took part, for that matter. You don't go to a game expecting things like that to happen, but every now and then, something magical happens. Who knows, maybe she even met the man of her dreams out there. More »
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"Sometimes you'd rather be lucky than good." More »
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Do it geographically. Had to split up that raging Orioles/Nationals rivalry, but this is the easiest way to go. Oh, and I had to move the Mariners to Oklahoma City. I hope that doesn't bother anyone. More »
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Leave it to Las Vegas to sate all our needs. Even those we didn't know we had before. (I'm looking at you midget escort service.) Everyone knows that the idea of a playoff is so awfully complicated that it would require a Manhattan Project-level commitment before anything could happen. Or, you know, a sports book could just seed the top 8 teams based on the final BCS standings and run the odds for each of those match-ups. Like the guys at BetOnline.com did. The result is a USC victory. But what would the odds look like on your Oklahoma-Penn State game? Or your Florida-Texas Tech game? Click on for the colorful bracket. Then wipe away the drool from your computer keyboards. More »
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It's Oklahoma and Florida for the BCS Title—an imperfect end to a season when no football team was perfect. Except, you know, Utah and Boise State. But they don't really count. What with their small conferences and even smaller media markets and exposure. The BCS is fair and impartial. Except, you know, this is a business and there's money to be made. Otherwise how do you explain Boise State getting beat for the BCS out by a 10-2 Ohio State team whose best win all season is Michigan State. Second best? Northwestern. But, to be fair, no one cares about the vast majority of the bowl games this season. (College football bowl monopolizers, ESPN, excluded.) Yeah, Penn State-USC should be fun to watch. But, like every other game, it's meaningless. Thanks to the bowl drafting order of the BCS, we don't even get to see Texas play Alabama. Instead we get Utah-Alabama and Texas-Ohio State. And don't even get me started on Cincinnati-Virginia Tech. Just like it does every season the BCS conspires to make everyone feel a bit cheated. Sigh. On to the round-up. More »
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Of all the ridiculous aspects of the BCS system, the conference championship game pisses me off more than any other because it points out the flagrant hypocrisy of the college presidents. In the same time period when they've fought a college football playoff because of the time it would add to the season, they've added conference championship games and a 12th game to the regular season. But that's not the only reason. I think conference championship games are ludicrous because in an era when every team is fighting to get to the BCS, only half of the BCS leagues actually require their teams to play them. So the Big 12, SEC, and ACC teams have to run the gauntlet of their regular season schedule and then slug out yet another game while the three other conference champs cool their heels and wait to advance. That's such a joke. Anyway, on to the preview...in a moment. I'm just getting warmed up. More »
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Oklahoma beat Oklahoma State late Saturday night 61-41. This score was enough to vault the Sooners ahead of Texas in the BCS Standings and, as a result, send them into the Big 12 Title Game against Missouri courtesy of the fifth tiebreak. (The sixth tiebreak was, in a nice nod to BCS totalitariianism, "Who does Kim Jong-Il think is better?") In raising Oklahoma the BCS computers managed to solve the quandary that left human pollsters uncertain: which of three tied teams deserves the opportunity to compete for a national championship? Of course this only mattered because Texas Tech stormed back to defeat Baylor before Oklahoma even kicked off. If Tech lost that game, then the Oklahoma game wouldn't even have mattered. and Texas is playing for the title. This all makes an awful lot of sense, right? More »
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Texas beat Texas A&M 49-9 yesterday. They're now 11-1. But unless you were in Texas you had no idea this game was happening. Even I didn't think to check this score until late Thursday night. That's because I spent Thanksgiving with family. Included in part of my day was a trip to Ford Field to watch the Titans destroy the Lions in person. Watching a team get beat as badly as the Lions was kind of uncomfortable. Especially when your wife's family is mostly Lions fans. It's kind of sad. Don't get me wrong, as a Titans fan it was great, but the Detroit fans were so abusive of their team it was like watching a couple you know is about to be divorced get into a nasty verbal fight in a room full of people. You want to tune it out and enjoy your day, but you just can't. The infinite variety of unique and fascinating ways I heard the Lions cursed yesterday could fill a novel. And the entire time I felt like I shouldn't be hearing it all, like this was something that should be happening behind closed doors. Anyway, on to a weekend in college football where Oregon, Auburn, Oklahoma State, Virginia, and Florida State all have a chance to ruin their most-hated in-state rivals' season. More »
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Yesterday I landed in Detroit for Thanksgiving. Our first stop upon arriving was an Italian restaurant where my wife's grandmother was celebrating her 80th birthday. I'm standing at the bar watching the the Titans-Jets game on the television and occasionally a sports fan from Michigan wonders by to see what's on the television. Inevitably we'd end up in conversation. If you've ever wondered whether a city and state's teams serve as a reflection of the surrounding economic struggles, come to Michigan. Every dropped pass, every failed fourth down, every mistake is a further sign that the world around Michiganders has come undone. Ask a Michigander which part of the state they're from, they'll extend their hand in front of their face, and instead of pointing to the part of the state on their palm, they slowly extend their middle finger in your direction. These are the questions that the first five fans asked me during the second half of the Titans game: More »
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• Oklahoma destroyed Texas Tech 65-21 in a must win game, keeping their hopes for a championship alive and sending the Red Raiders limping home with sore bungholes. Sooners' quarterback Sam Bradford threw for 304 yards and four touchdowns and the running game contributed five more in an effort to make up for an earlier loss to Texas that threatened to derail their path to a national title. Also up for grabs is the Big 12 title as Oklahoma, Texas, and Texas Tech are 10-1, 6-1 in the South. More »
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I’ve got a crush on Mike Leach. I don’t want to go on a date and eat cheese fries with him and watch planes take off from Lubbock or anything but I’m not going to pretend I don’t like him anymore. We aren’t in 8th grade. So I’m coming clean. My football team, the Tennessee Vols, has never had a coaching search in my life before and it’s perfectly normal for a grown man like me to have a coaching crush on another grown man. I’m not going to try and hide the fact that I get a little rush in my chest every time Texas Tech highlights come on or that I feel butterflies in my stomach when Mike Leach answers questions about his offense. More »
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Just a tip, don’t ever try and take a baby into Neyland Stadium. No matter how old the kid (ours is less than nine months old and was sleeping in a baby bjorn on his mom’s chest). Babies have to have tickets to Neyland too. I have no idea why the University of Tennessee would have this policy. Especially since two of the most money grubbing entities on earth, the airlines and the NFL allow infants to accompany their parents without tickets. But not the Vols. I understand the need for an age limit, but if a kid can't walk, he's probably not sitting in his own seat. Just so stupid. Anyway like five of the strongest Scotty Hopson shots in succession (a sweet concoction of Kentucky bourbon and orange juice to honor the Vols top basketball recruit from Kentucky),Eric Berry helped to erase the pain of my son's first trip to Neyland. On to 12 observations from Saturday’s games. More »
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For those of you who emailed and asked whether the bearded guy in the orange shirt on the sideline at UT-Georgia was me. Yep, it was. There's a refined sense of pleasure in being a fan and watching your team suffer a drubbing from the sideline. I think I spoke about five words the entire game because I was afraid of getting in the way or getting leveled. Early on one of UT's student managers said, "Clay, keep your head on a swivel." So I was terrified of getting Weis'd and laying on the ground while my cell phone buzzed with text messages from friends making fun of how badly I got wrecked. Slow motion instant replays would not be my friend. I also didn't want to cheer too aggressively or really talk to the players too much for fear of them saying, "Who's the weird dude with the beard who just slapped me on the side of the helmet?" If you'll look closely at the above picture you can see that I've got a notepad so I can take notes for my book. Also, I'm not certain but I believe I became the first person to wear flip-flops on the sideline of a football game as well. All of this combined means I'm the biggest loser to be on the sideline for a major college football game since Bob Davie was still coaching. Anyway, here are 11 other things I noted during a week of carnage. More »
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The biggest week of college football games comes at a good time. Your stocks are tanking, summer is fading, you may or may not get fired in the newest round of layoffs, and you're thinking about getting an MBA or going to law school but you're not sure whether it makes sense to take out the student loads. As if that weren't enough a presidential election is bearing down on you and your condoms broke with the bartender who needs to lose fifteen pounds and eight years. Yeah, you need a weekend on the couch. Good for you. So do I. Especially because my son is learning to walk and this means that my job is to hold his hands and chase him wherever he wants to go. All the stooping is killing my back. It actually hurts to type right now. This is not a good sign. Thank God for football. Here's my breakdown of the 8 biggest games of the weekend. More »
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Each week more signs appear behind the stage at ESPN's College Gameday. Some are original and funny (Knowshon Crossing sign with his leaping outline), some are entirely inside jokes (let's make a sign with our friend's name on it and hold it up for three hours early in the morning), and some are deemed offensive and are destroyed by ESPN heavies. Which brings us to the sign posted above, "Lou Holtz Spits, Mark May Swallows." It comes to me via reader Pete and he says, " By 10:05 AM ESPN had already confiscated it and broken it apart, but it did set off quite a commotion the few minutes it was up." So now you know if you're interested in trying to sneak your sign past the heavies at ESPN, you're out of luck. Unless that sign says, "Lee Corso is a penis", then you may survive for a little while. I've always thought that Gameday doesn't take advantage of this signage enough. For instance, what if they actually made Desmond Howard do something, anything worthwhile on the show, and put him to work selecting the five best signs of the day and bringing them on set for the final segment? Or the top three signs? Actually, given his sense of humor Howard might not be the best choice. But wouldn't this be a great idea? To acknowledge all the fans who show up early in the morning and scream and yell and make the show such a success. Granted "Lou Holtz spits, Mark May Swallows" is not going to make the cut, but for original signs with good humor, wouldn't it be cool to encourage the creativity? Instead of, you know, taking a college kid's sign and breaking it up after deeming it offensive. (Offensive is a stretch here anyway, Lou Holtz does spit and Mark May does swallow...sometimes, or he would die.) Could Pete have gotten away with, "Lou Holtz Expectorates and Mark May Ingests." I think so. I want to know which ESPN guru is in charge of deciding whether a sign is offensive or not. I'm picturing this bespectacled guy sitting in front of a large HD screen on the Gameday bus, television images reflected off his glasses, laptop in lap, and googling sign phrases with laser-like focus. Then he has like fifteen guys dressed entirely in black (the ESPN shockforce), snaps his fingers, and Gino Torretta goes outside and wreaks havoc. Either that or they borrow David Pollack from CBS and send him out to say, "Golly gee, y'all should have known better," and Pollack throws the signs down and then skips from one side of the sign to another, smiling at you all the while, as he destroys your sign. Anyway, if you've ever wondered whether ESPN brings the muscle to break down offensive signs, now you know. On to 8 other things I noted from this week's games. 1. Someone finally stopped Tim Tebow on a 4th and 1 shotgun sneak. That team was Ole Miss. Prior to this stop, South Carolina, Tennessee, Georgia, and Ole Miss had all been victimized by the Tebow fourth down sneak leading to victories. It was believed by many, much like the four minute mile, that this play simply couldn't be bested. And then Ole Miss stopped it. A Houston Nutt coached team stopped it. Wow. When this final score was announced at UT-Auburn, there was a roar throughout the stadium. A roar so loud that the Florida guys with their sleevless t-shirts and the Florida girls with their bingo wings, felt a sudden chill of air on the backs of their exposed arms. Here's the play. Note how Ole Miss sends every single player storming into the center of the line. There isn't a single player more than two yards from the line of scrimmage. If Florida goes play action here, they win. Or even with the Tim Tebow jump pass. New theory: Florida can't handle the rural SEC schools. Ole Miss has won two in a row in the Swamp, Miss. State sent the Zooker packing, and Auburn's owning of the Gators is well-chronicled. There's something about cows that spells Gator disaster. Otherwise how to explain the incongruous site of Ole Miss fans mocking the Gator Chomp with a derogatory chop of their own in Gainesville. 2. Wisconsin blows a 19-0 lead at Michigan and loses. As if that weren't bad enough this was the biggest second-half comeback in Michigan stadium history. That's 500 games. This is one of those losses where if you're a Wisconsin fan you find yourself sitting outside in the fading light staring off into the coming darkness thinking, "No matter what happens, Michigan is always going to be better than we are at football. Always." Michigan had 5 turnovers and only 21 yards of offense in the first half. And they won. Wisconsin had an undefeated team, was favored, and choked away the second half. How painful was it? Wisconsin scored on a two-point conversion to tie the game but was penalized and failed on the second attempt. 3. Tennessee quarterback Jonathan Crompton is the worst quarterback in my life at UT. He was 8-23 for 67 yards against Auburn. To say that this game was an atrocious display of football is insulting to the word atrocious. From UT giving Auburn a defensive touchdown by failing to execute the always complicated handoff, to Auburn's quarterback, Chris Todd, having the arm strength of a girl's power puff quarterback, this thing was epically bad on every level. How bad? Auburn's fans booed their team while they were leading in the fourth quarter. How bad part two? Jonathan Crompton's entire quarterbacking skill seems to consist of throwing the ball really hard. He didn't complete a pass for the final 20 minutes of the game. At one point, though, he did manage to throw a three-yard slant pattern 400 miles an hour. No one on earth could have caught this thing. Yep, he's Ricky Vaughn. My book is going to be awesome. It might just end up being an itemized roster of how much money Jonathan Crompton has cost me. There was no joy in either fan base aw we left the stadium. Everyone looked like they'd just witnessed an execution. 4. Duke beats UVa 31-3. Meaning that Duke, Northwestern, and Vanderbilt are a combined 12-1 this season. The only loss among the three? Northwestern beat Duke. All three are likely to go bowling. As if that weren't enough ESPN's College Gameday just announced yesterday that they're coming to Vanderbilt for the game against Auburn this weekend. Seriously, Vanderbilt is hosting College Gameday. Any Tennessee fan who said that losing offensive coordinator David Cutcliffe wouldn't hurt was a fool. Duke is probably 1-3 without him, UT is 3-1 with him. Anyway, the big news here is that Vanderbilt becomes the smartest school since Williams-Amherst to get College Gameday. I'm expecting signs that are so insulting, biting, and smart that ESPN isn't smart enough to note their sublime subterfuge. Don't disappoint me Vandy, don't disappoint me. 5. Alabama eviscerates Georgia. Much to the chagrin of Georgia fans, I've been one of those people who has been saying all along that Georgia was overvalued relative to the other teams in the SEC. But even I was shocked by this outcome. 31-0 at the half? Imagine how bad it would have been if Georgia hadn't blacked out the stadium. What's the only thing worse than watching your team lose 14-12? Having to drive back across the whole state of Alabama and listen to Crimson Tide radio announcer Eli Gold have 48 orgasms on the radio. Here's Eli, pictured above. By the way, can Alabama fans back me up on this, is Eli the only radio announcer on the Crimson Tide broadcast capable of speaking in sentences? Everyone else he had on-air with him just spoke occasional words and then uttered sounds after. How did they select these guys? Worse, who did they beat out? Eli Gold sounds like a Shakepearean actor and his co-workers sound like stand-ins for the missing link. 6. Oklahoma is your new number 1 team after the dust setlles on Saturday's results. The Sooners dispatched TCU 35-10. Four of the top ten lose. Alabama slides in at number 2 after their pasting of Georgia. Three teams from the Big 12 join two from the SEC. Anyone who tells you they have any idea what the hell is going to happen for the rest of the season is a damn fool. Survival is the operative word. Are we headed towards another two-loss national champion? Perhaps. 7. Don't look now but BYU is going to cause some major BCS headaches. They moved up to number 8 and only play one top 25 opponent for the remainder of the season (at home against Utah on the final week of their regular season) With all the attrition up top could BYU end up in the title game? Yeah, they really could. 8. UConn took down Louisville to go to 5-0 and reach the top 25 at 24 with fellow top ten crasher South Florida from the Big East. Which brings us to a second crazy thought, could BYU and South Florida end up in the national championship game? Looking at both of their schedules they'll be favored to be undefeated come season's end (with the possible exception for USF's season finale on December 6th at West Virginia). Fans would demand a playoff then, right? Right? More »
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Today's preview of the #4 team in all the land is brought to us by Rohit Joshi, a senior majoring in business at OU. Yep, he's still in college, getting ready for the start of college football season while we're all cranking out billable hours on document review. Life is fair. He says job solicitations are welcome. He's also Deadspin commenter SheMateMe. Enjoy. More »
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You know what school is interested in former Oklahoma quarterback Rhett Bomar? Division II school Texas A&M-Commerce. Rhett Bomar. Commerce. Irony. More »
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