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These are the five we included in our poll on Sunday. As of this writing, Roseanne Barr's version is the "worst anthem" clubhouse leader by a substantial margin (she has nearly 50 percent of the vote, with Carl Lewis checking in at 28). Facebook users can vote here.
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Bruins announcer @RealJackEdwards, a real American who hates the Canadian monarchy or something, is visiting the White House and letting his Twitter followers in on his deranged thoughts ("Anyone wanna tangle with the US Navy?"). It's a treat. More »
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Aging rockers often struggle to hit high notes, but Steven Tyler's juxtaposition of screaming and a languid pace made his rendition of the National Anthem before the AFC Championship in New England especially difficult to listen to. (His liberal lack of adherence to the actual lyrics didn't help.) More »
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As he often does, John Daly wowed crowds with his performance at a golf tournament. This time, however, the action took place off the links. More »
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Via Deitsch: "Been told former President George W. Bush will narrate a 2-minute opening for Fox NFL Sunday on Sept. 11 at 12PM." More »
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Teddy's dad Mike sent this link in earlier this afternoon. He thought you might like to see it. So, now presenting "Teddy catching his first fish ever, naming it 'Free' and releasing it back to the wild."

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Yesterday, the good people of the Yahoo! comments section expressed their displeasure with NBC's edits on the Pledge of Allegiance during the US Open. More »
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NBC ran a pretaped segment before the final round at Congressional yesterday in which some soldiers saluted and a bunch of kids recited the pledge and a handful of monuments hulked above the D.C. skyline in a way that suggested that someone in the editing room knows his Leni Riefenstahl. The whole thing was so nut-punchingly patriotic it's a wonder we didn't see an eagle soaring above the fairway at 10 with Luke Donald's hair on its talons. It was tacky and stupid, and in a sane world the only people who would be angry today are the handful of fans tired of seeing their sports wrapped in bunting. This is not that world. More »
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U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! [via Luke Winn's Twitter] More »
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Scott Stapp, not content with making you hate music, God, and baseball, has decided to ruin America for everyone, too. Here he is, doing unspeakable things to our country's national anthem. More »
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Remember how CNBC's Darren Rovell went weirdly nativist yesterday, calling technical American Meb Keflezighi a "ringer" and grouching that his New York City Marathon victory shouldn't count as a real American achievement? Yeah, his bad. More »
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American Meb Keflezighi won the New York City Marathon yesterday, which seemed pretty cool until a couple of wet blankets came along to remind everyone he's only "technically" American. More »
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Thomas Cetnar, an ex-cop convicted of stealing drug money, owns the Newark Bears, a minor league team managed by Tim Raines. Cetnar ejected three teenagers for not standing during "God Bless America." They're now suing him in federal court. More »
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Remember a little more than a year ago when George Steinbrenner, inflated with patriotic fervor, imposed a laughable rule that instructed security officials to ban anyone from "excessive movement" during the 7th inning rendition of "God Bless America." Granted, most New Yorkers seemingly abide by it, but sometimes the system must be tested by one man's agnosticism and patriotic indifference. Oh, and he had to piss. Meet Bradford Campeau-Laurion, a 29-year-old man from Astoria, Queens, and a director of web production for a "major website" who made the unfortunate decision to blatantly disregard "God Bless America" and hit the head. He was dealt with swiftly and aggressively by Steinbrenner's Red, White, And Blue Muscle. I left a message with Yankees media relations for their comments on this, but it's probably safe to assume that they'll only react to this if Brad here makes a colossal stink over it. Brad's detailed, irate, email is after the jump. More »
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