Under normal circumstances, we couldn't imagine a way that we would ever buy our father a birthday present — August 6, everybody; postmark Bryan Leitch, Mattoon, Illinois! — that's a piece of Chicago Cubs memorabilia. But this might just be an exception.

Currently up for auction on Events.org: A urinal signed by every member of the Chicago Cubs.

We can't quite make out all the signatures, so we can't tell if Michael Barrett was still around when everybody brought out their blue magic markers. But if he was, we're pretty sure this has been used.

Clubhouse Urinal Signed By The Cubs [Events.org]