NoPracticoBurress commented on Lock Up Your Bike Racks: Deadspin Goes To Bristol

"When did Leitch dye his hair blonde?"

NoPracticoBurress commented on Vick in Philly: Three Interpretations

"and then, in the third quarter of a game in Week 12, will absent-mindedly send him into the game to punt."

NoPracticoBurress commented on Wrigley Beer-Tossing Hand Job Still At Large (UPDATE) (UPDATE NO)

"Yes, in Victorino's hometown of Wailuku, thoughtless beer-tossers are dragged by the hair to the top of a volcano and pelted with coconuts. Still better than my hometown, where thoughtless beer-tossers are dragged out of a bar and stomped to death in the parking lot."

NoPracticoBurress commented on Look At You. You Disgust Me.

"Remember that whole Erin Andrews debacle 2 weeks ago?"

NoPracticoBurress commented on And Here's The Blurry, Anticlimatic Footage Of The LeBron Dunk (UPDATE)

"As opposed to the blurry, very climactic video linked last week."

NoPracticoBurress commented on Tony Romo And Jessica Simpson Reportedly Split For 98th Time

"This is why you don't proposition Papa Smurf for a threesome."

NoPracticoBurress commented on Tennessean Brings Out The Dead, Asks About Exciting New Line Of Restaurants

"The newspaper further apologized for printing the restaurant's name as Gridiron9mm."

NoPracticoBurress commented on Hypospadias And You: An In-Depth Study Of Bong Dick

"This story is so funny I just pissed my hat."

NoPracticoBurress commented on Let's Get This Over With Early: Joakim Noah Smokes Weed, Anonymous, Possibly Fake Text Messager Says

"@JohnnyDakotaStateU: Jesus Christ."

NoPracticoBurress commented on Lenny Dykstra Lets The World Know He's "Flying Higher"

"@Hit Bull Win Steak: Nice."