"wanted to keep his situation private, because he didn't want it to appear he was trying to get sympathy as his trial nears."

So by saying he wanted to keep the situation private, he really didn't want to keep the situation private, but it will appear he wanted the situation private, and thus, the original sympathy he was pretending not to look for.

Well played, PR dude.

Talk About Stuff

Just ran into Ramon and he, in a somewhat unnerving manner, proclaimed he's up for some stuff.
Is it Vinnie or Vinny? Get your shit together, ESPN Media Zone.


What shall not be lost here is that Vinnie Malhotra has yet to experience his first shave.
AJ, would rather eat turnbuckle stuffing or wax George "The Animal" Steele's back?
It's widely assumed that 93% of the people who submitted these tragic errors are in no way jealous of Bill Simmons.
What about Coughlin's law?
The most shocking part of the scandalous, scantily clad scandal photo is that she looks far less like Gilbert Brown than she normally does.
That guy at the end spilled his Miller Lite. A wasted beer for an inaccurately clocked pitch that turned out not to be a record. Endless regret and infinite sadness.
With my team in one of their first pennant races of my young life, this was unacceptable. So my father would call the local Associated Press bureau each morning and ask what our team did the night before.

This is fantastic.
You two need to hash this out over whiskey at Angry Wade's.
The amount of $72.36 was an touching nod to The Fridge and Merton Hanks, correct?
I am so proud that I actually know Roy Spancake and submitted that name.

The man's last name is embedded in a god damn pancake.
You'd think a company like that would be more subtle and say something like "Beefarino" on the side.
Two esteemed sports writers were stranded in different cities, but absolutely had to get to their destinations. These are their stories.

Fuck yes Law-In-Order voice.
This is why they play the games.
Why is the guy next to him eating a giant imaginary Gobstopper?
If this were the NBA, they'd likely have to face David Stern & Russ Granik in the infamous Breakthrough & Conquer.
I'll be the one in the Brad Lohaus jersey gown.
Dude Getting Blown By Dog

And just like that, L.A. has the name of their inevitable NFL Franchise. Just need an 's' after 'dude' and we're all set.
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