Thank you Deadspin!

-- The Royal Bank of Scotland's Rec-League Basketball Team

After finishing his playing career, A.C. Green wanted to try the next best thing to winning a big game.
The same "sources" went on to say, "Now would be an ideal time to get your Cavs season tickets -- before the big rush. Order them now by calling 1-800-820-Cavs, or by visiting [www.nba.com] Get yours TODAY!!!"
I thought "Afterball" was the sequel to "The Sun Also Rises."
My advice: find the best doctor. They're more expensive, but 'er worth it.
"The individual in question was never someone that would not be permitted to attend the event today."

-- Convoluted Jerry

"That's what happens when you make bad decisions in your life. You can't go to the White House.''

-- Laura Bush's dad, 1963, cancelling a planned family vacation to Washington DC.

"I don't think that he's smart enough."

Well, it only took him seven months to read those five paragraphs.

This is exactly the reason that the Nationals did not promote Brad Coon.
We should have blamed the death on republicans and "tea-baggers."
Jack W. -- if you are going to make up a fake name for Melanie, try to use it the whole time.
If this van's a rockin', please come a knockin'
I told Jay Marrotti that Kornheiser's radio show was better.

It was not long after Marrotti's (brief) show had replaced Kornheiser in Chicago.

There is not a day goes by that I am not happy I did it.
@Chris Hanson's Axe: Apparently so does Barry Stanton.
@SenatorHowellTankerbell: And I promised my girlfriend we would keep dating after I went away to college. We all lie to high school students.
That's not his HOF ballot. Its an inventory of the two Sportflics packs he just opened.
This story is a mixed blessing for the dude. One the one hand, it advertises that he had a threesome. On the other, its pretty insulting to refer to his junk as a scooter rather than a motorcycle.
NFL policies do not extend to private conduct or make judgments about the appropriateness of personal relationships, except where that conduct or those relationships raise issues under the law or league policies.

Thank's for the circular statement NFL. Now do you might telling us about the league policies that do extend to private conduct and personal relationship?
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