Linscrutable.
Hey Harbaugh! HARBAUGH! Check out my impression of your mom! Woo! Haley out!
Originally, the Polish Defense involved concession and retreat to Romania.
Laugh all you want, but when the sleeve and pantleg markets collapse he'll be sitting on a gold mine.
At the risk of losing my Gawker Media Gold Club Snark Card™ I have all the respect in the world for this guy and hope he gets back on track and soon.
/whiskey dick joke
+1. Bravo. COTY.
Thanks a lot, Ninja. Now where am I going to get my Anchorman quotes and my tangentially-related song lyrics?
The League turned down Ray Lewis's original idea for a Super Bowl player safety ad. It involved a getaway limo, a dumpster, and eyewitnesses who could keep their fuckin' mouths shut.
The balls on these guys...
Maybe you could do a barter exchange. He could teach you about being a artsy fartsy football-hating commie pussy so you can impress that hot barista.
Hey Salisbury, you forgot the Sent from my iPhone
+1. Almost rivals "decaying bat stench" as the grossest thing in this post.
This entire story would be better with folksy, nonsensical Waylon Jennings voiceovers.
"Now I don't know about you, but puttin' your marble sack on a man's head is like puttin' socks on a rooster...you're gonna regret it. (guitar riff)"
No one thinks the fix is in, not in a $3500 claiming race in Grove City, Ohio
As someone who has a long history in racing, both as a horseman and as a fan, I can say that $2500 claimer in Grove City, Ohio is exactly where the fix would be in.
Downing and his lawyer are en route to New Orleans to face possible sexual battery charges
Funny, my ballsack is named "the judge."
Yeah, and that fat English nanny you just interviewed? It's really Bartolo Colon.
"Gallo" means rooster, but is usually used to refer to fighting cocks. So that's cockfighting beer. The perfect cold beverage to enjoy at your neighborhood cockfight. Bad ass.
Pictured: Tebow, just before being swallowed by the whale.
Taps placed on Todd Haley's personal cell phone revealed his pet name for his wife is "fuckbucket," but for his girlfriend it's "dickbarrel."
Smoking cigarettes and walking around the Mall in Washington, waiting for informants to mistake him for some sort of omniscient government functionary who has the power to ensure their and their family's safety in the face of exposing a conspiracy that goes straight to the highest levels of power.
Then raping them.
