I really wish Heeb Hymieyidowitz would stop calling me every week, right before I umpire at the JCC.
Wait. Smithers had a man?
[mlb.mlb.com] MLB ratifies new umpire contract and...it has been learned that as part of the agreement, Selig will have more flexibility to dictate expansion of instant replay. Wait. What? #tips
@Gravy: Oh, and for what it's worth, I love this feature, too. Or maybe I just need to stop drinking. Again.
Man, I loved Johnny Carson. Not because he was a fellow Nebraskan in a state where the small number of natives who find fame also find the adoration of an entire state as birthright. But because he set the ideal for the geeky kid I was. Carson was so introverted that he rarely attended the Hollywood party circuit that begged his approval. People would say he often could be found at those parties studying the host's artwork, or simply sitting alone, and so painfully, painfully shy that a simple conversation was nearly impossible. Yet, 4-5 nights every week, he would bare his soul to a nationwide audience, all while out-charming the charmingest people and out-funnying the funniest people in show business. For 30+ years. There's a reason every comedian who made us laugh over those 30+ years saved their best new material for appearances on Carson's show. To make Johnny laugh, and receive the coveted wave to sit on his couch, was to be anointed by the king. A.J., you're doing a good job. But there's a long way to go before a gold star equals the wave from the couch. Daaaah-da-da-dah-da. Da-dah-da, da-daaah. /Leno's a dick, joke
@FavreFAIL: The South. Where predominantly Latino populations live in Buford and predominantly Buford populations live in Montezuma.
@rulesboy: ...and Chris Henry in the pickup-surfing era.
Scott Reynolds, of PewterReport.com, reports Tampa Bay Buccaneers SS Jermaine Phillips was arrested early Sunday, Jan. 10, and charged with domestic battery by strangulation, which is a felony. He remains in a Hillsborough County (Fla.) jail and is being held without bond. [emphasis added] #tips
Jim Leavitt Takes His Case To The Courts [www.sbnation.com] #tips
...and every British schoolboy will come to know that the battle of Liverpool was lost in the email fields of Yahoo!.
Last night, Shelly Smith on ESPN Radio said that Herm Edwards is one of the leading candidates for the USC coaching job if/when Pete Carroll leaves. #tips
Not a facemask. Adams is just squishing the Line Judge.
@Dandy Koufax: FINALLY!!! Someone on this here damn interwebs site talking some sense!@!!!11 Sent from iDuckBlind
"Islamic culture does not allow us to hug a lady and have alcohol," committee chairman Jamshed Ahmed Dasti told Reuters. "However, we are encouraged to carry plastic explosives in our underwear. Quite a bang if you haven't tried it."
Meanwhile, Angola is all about the factions.
Smashing Time Wins $50,000 again at The World Series of Beer Pong V! How did we miss this sporting juggernaut last week? A repeat champion at the World Series of Beer Pong. Headlines with exclamation points. Female team members playing the Cover(-less) 2 defense. The WSOBP had it all(!) [www.bpong.com] #tips
@WILBON_08: Now that's a tip worth its Waithe in Gold. #tips
SOMEWHERE EAST OF LOS ALAMOS, NEW MEXICO.... I've kept a little secret — that we've got Einstein's brain stashed in the trunk... "Damn. I should have gone with this ending for Prisoner's Dilemma." -Richard Powers
Marshwn Lynch needs a raise. Lou Michel, of The Buffalo News, reports Buffalo Bills RB Marshawn Lynch has been accused of stealing $20 from a woman at a restaurant in December. The woman's husband, Buffalo Police Sgt. William Crawford, filed a complaint with police a day after the incident, but they delayed giving a statement to detectives until Wednesday, Jan. 6, in part because she wanted to wait until the Bills' football season ended and Lynch was out of town. Crawford said his wife's girlfriend was approached at the restaurant by another member of the Buffalo Bills, who struck up a conversation with the unmarried woman. At some point, Lynch arrived at the restaurant and joined them. When the woman's girlfriend stepped away from the table, Crawford said his wife pulled out a $20 bill to pay their check in preparation for leaving. Lynch then grabbed the money from her hand. #tips
Quebecois separatists have a new blueprint for bringing a successful NHL team to Quebec City.
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