Ten Humans
Which Sports Death Would Affect Us Like MJ's?

Which Sports Death Would Affect Us Like MJ's?

Deleted Scenes
The One With People Drinking And The Return Of The Fanny Cough Yarn-Spinner

The One With People Drinking And The Return Of The Fanny Cough Yarn-Spinner

Why your stadium sucks
Why Your Stadium Sucks: Oakland-Alameda County Coliseum

Why Your Stadium Sucks: Oakland-Alameda County Coliseum

moneyball
Soderbergh's <i>Moneyball</i> Script Too Real To Get Made

Soderbergh's Moneyball Script Too Real To Get Made

Media Meltdowns
The Jay Mariotti Online Express Could Be Headed Back To Chicago

The Jay Mariotti Online Express Could Be Headed Back To Chicago

2009 NBA Draft
Not Feeling Minnesota: Rubio May Stay In Europe, Says Father

Not Feeling Minnesota: Rubio May Stay In Europe, Says Father

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Deadspin
  • Image of Matt Sussman
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    Matt Sussman

    http://www.thelayoffbeard.com
    Show: Comments | Posts | Favorites | Messages | Friends | Followers | All Activity | Hybrid

  • Duan!

    Team Iraq Will Be Your Soccer Darling Tomorrow

    There's some type of non-American football tournament commencing in South Africa tomorrow as an appetizer to the World Cup. And, look, there's Iraq. Wave to them! More »
    06/13/09
    5,898
    32

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by Proverbial: I think I speak for everyone in Canada when I say thanks for posting a Hulu video. 6 Responses | Other threads

  • Stanley Cup

    Don't Ask Marian Hossa For Stock Market Advice

    The dogpile on Marian Hossa has been sufficient and thorough. The Wings beat Hossa's Penguins last year. Then the Penguins beat Hossa's Red Wings. Goat cheese. More »
    06/13/09
    16,291
    29

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by Night Man: Maybe if gay ninja Suss didn't destar all of the people funnier than him things would be different. 5 Responses | Other threads

  • High school baseball

    Iowa High School Umpire Knows How To Clear A Room

    High school baseball umpires have a lot of options in handling disputes. They can give teams warnings, ask the audience to control themselves ... or just throw everyone out of the game. More »
    06/13/09
    11,200
    11

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by Don't Spook the Horse: This post wasn't about farts? Well that's disappointing. I guess there won't be a Bert Blyleven post today. 1 Responses | Other threads

  • Golf

    The LPGA's Melting Pot Of The Future, TODAY!

    06/13/09
    2,687
    10
  • Trent Green

    Guy That Enabled Kurt Warner's Career Retires

    As a very, very late bloomer to football, one of my first memories was hearing about Rams quarterback Trent Green down for the count in 1999. More »
    06/13/09
    6,338
    19

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by Chris Hanson's Axe: Yes, this is Deadspin, where we constantly highlight and lament the stupidity and immaturity of today's athletes, so naturally when... 4 Responses | Other threads

  • Bobbleheads

    Shin-Soo Choo Is Korean For "Don Johnson"

    Tonight the Indians are giving away an undisclosed number of Shin-Soo Choo '80s-style bobbleheads. You know, back when South Korea was a great place to live. [Slanch Report] More »
    06/13/09
    3,108
    10

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by OokieDookie: Will someone please take the commenter name Disco Shin-Soo? I'm too white to do it myself. 1 Responses | Other threads

  • Soccer

    Even Their Coaches Know How To Flop

    In this undated video, we have an exciting footysoccer game with brilliant ball control, superb balance, and absolutely no match fixing whatsoever. What else do you need? More »
    06/13/09
    9,681
    18

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by Phil Mickelsons Man Tits: This is definitely one of my favorite videos on the internets. + Watch video_from=PL&index=36 2 Responses | Other threads

  • Stanley Cup

    Only Minimal Arrests? For Shame, Pittsburgh

    "We have a few arrests. For the most part people are being orderly but we've got a few people who don't want to leave." C'mon, Pittsburgh. That's no way to usher in a Crosby regime. [Post-Gazette] More »
    06/13/09
    2,963
    16

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by Slothrop: So now we know what this Yinzer does for a living [theblogdiet.files.wordpress.com] 3 Responses | Other threads

  • Warm childhood memories

    The Mets Do What The Mets, Pressured Third Graders Do

    Luis Castillo is now the face of the New York Mets' misery. All he had to do was catch that popup, and we're not talking about him. More »
    06/13/09
    8,639
    37

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by lastingsmilledge: meanwhile, orlando hudson is going to win another gold glove while hitting .304 with just as many RBIs and more... 3 Responses | Other threads

  • Wake up deadspin!

    Ladies, Meet The Splash 'Stache

    Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to tips@deadspin.com. Subject: Morning crap More »
    06/13/09
    5,870
    24

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by J-No: It also appears he has had a penisechtomy. 3 Responses | Other threads

  • Duan!

    So Here's How To Improve The NFL Draft

    They tinkered with this year's draft by moving up to 4 p.m. so Guamanians could watch it in the middle of the night. Did it work? More »
    04/25/09
    13,513
    796

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by This.Is.Malcolm: So anyway, bought a 2008 Ford Focus today. Love this seller's market. Car is a beaut. Used, but only 17,000... 56 Responses | Other threads

  • 2009 NFL Draft

    All Right Screw It, Now It's An NFL Draft Live Blog

    The post-to-post format is groovy but just a little taxing. So let's get down to the live blog tomfoolery everyone knows and/or loves. Refresh, relax, and remember Bea Arthur for who she was. More »
    04/25/09
    19,719
    299

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by wonderlic---myballs: Watching Sox blow their comeback. Did Greg Paulus go yet? /Giants fan//Like the Hicks pick 16 Responses | Other threads

  • 2009 NFL Draft

    T-R-D-E! Trade! Trade! Trade!

    The Browns were all "hey, let's pick someone" and the Jets were all "um, no, how bout we draft?" and the Browns were all "whoa" and the Jets were all "yay, Sanchez!" More »
    04/25/09
    11,926
    23

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by J.R. Brown: And Andre Smith is a Bengal... BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA...! Oh this is going to be so bad... 5 Responses | Other threads

  • 2009 NFL Draft

    I See A Green Hat And I Want It Painted Black

    Aaron Curry, padded in enough leather to coat an entire herd of skinless cattle, finally ads something non-black to his outfit. Neon green. He'll mesh well with the Seahawks defense. More »
    04/25/09
    6,831
    10

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by Father of 2 Future First Rounders: Mmmm....skinless cattle. I could go for a burger right now. 1 Responses | Other threads

  • 2009 NFL Draft

    Tyson Jackson, Go Directly To KC

    The city loves its steak, but hopefully they're fine with chicken. It looked like not many saw defensive end Tyson Jackson going in this pick, but what the heck do I know? More »
    04/25/09
    3,627
    9

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by FiddlingWhileJimRomeBurns: Ah fuck...are Herm and Carl still running the draft? more » | Other threads

  • 2009 NFL Draft

    Wait, Which Jason Smith?

    04/25/09
    2,593
    5
  • 2009 NFL Draft

    Stafford Welcomed To Detroit With Warm, Prickly Arms

    Yes, Stafford is now with the Detroit Lions. And who can blame them? They totally had the other team winning the 2008 Capital One Bowl. I'd boo too. More »
    04/25/09
    3,661
    12

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by Father of 2 Future First Rounders: Nice job picking a shirt and tie combo in team colors so that the hat would match. 2 Responses | Other threads

  • NFL Draft

    A Great QB List That Excludes Tom Brady AND Spergon Wynn

    If you can name 43 out of 56 first round NFL Draft quarterbacks, you win the prize of being smarter than me. Hint: two of them are named Manning. They're brothers! [Sporcle] More »
    04/25/09
    5,185
    26

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by ClintonPortishead: 38, which is disappointing. Aced the last twelve years, missed too many 80s guys like Mirer and Testaverde. I'm an... 2 Responses | Other threads

  • NFL Draft

    How To Entertain Yourself Today If You Don't Have A Bigass Touchscreen

    Well, hell, CNN gave John King one for the 2008 election. Why doesn't Michael Smith get one for the NFL Draft? More »
    04/25/09
    4,725
    20

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by Fatty_B: /threadjack. Whatever the opposite of nightmare fuel is, I believe this would qualify. Bar Refaeli shows off her Hurley perfect little... 3 Responses | Other threads

  • College Football

    Stick To Foursquare And Hopscotch, College Boy

    04/25/09
    2,748
    36
  • Hockey

    Here's Why Killing A Referee Is a Poor Idea

    It's never too early for a bizarre story involving murder, cover-up, the Philadelphia Flyers, and the age old dilemma of players and referees not seeing eye to eye. More »
    04/25/09
    9,614
    30

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by Dick Valentine: Clinical stuff from Rooney. 2 Responses | Other threads

  • NFL Draft

    Your 2009 Detroit Lions Are Matthew Stafford And Ten Other Guys

    The tension building around the first overall pick has been punctured with anonymous sources for, I think, the 312th straight year. We know that Matthew "Matt" Stafford will be the Lions' guy. More »
    04/25/09
    3,823
    39

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by bluebears: Can someone come to Detroit and be ready to shoot me in the head when this pick is officially announced?... 4 Responses | Other threads

  • Wake up deadspin!

    Andre Smith Needs Your Support, Both Emotionally And Areolically

    Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to tips@deadspin.com. Subject: Morning crap More »
    04/25/09
    12,008
    47

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by TheOnlyNetsFan: His tits look like Stuart Scott's eyes. 2 Responses | Other threads

  • March Madness

    North Carolina-Michigan State Live Blog

    This one's for all the General Motors, laddies. Will it be the Tar Heels? Or the Tar Heels? Then again, the Tar Heels could pull it out. Time will tell. More »
    04/06/09
    10,391
    205

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by FiddlingWhileJimRomeBurns: It's been amusing folks. If Rick Wagoner resigns as coach of the Spartans someone wake me up. Otherwise I'll catch... 16 Responses | Other threads

  • Duan!

    They Saved The Goofy Games For Friday Night

    I had this well-thought out screed about how the first round was about as scintillating as a Mennonite snuff film. I had to tear it up and deposit it in a UNICEF box. More »
    03/21/09
    7,249
    110

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by Camp Tiger Claw: Fucking shit. I hope you all die in a flood. 18 Responses | Other threads

  • March Madness

    Pitt Havin' A Little Trouble With East Tennessee State

    03/20/09
    1,109
    14
  • March Madness

    Kansas Experiencing Severe Woodside

    03/20/09
    1,624
    8
  • March Madness

    Sixteen More Moments, Ranging from Shining To Semi-Opaque

    Let's have another day, just like the other day. Only maybe, maybe let's try to have a buzzer beater somewhere. The One Shining Moment montage collage specialist might have to start looking for work. More »
    03/20/09
    7,357
    49

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by crazyjoedavola: 7:10 - Louisville vs Morehead State - Stev D, ArkansasFred, cheese-mac, and David Hume It might take 3 Polish people... 6 Responses | Other threads

  • Duan!

    We Survived Day One (Because We Were Favored)

    Boy, Thursday was fun, wasn't it? Sixteen games, win-or-go-home, play hooky from work and school. It was just missing one thing. Someone — anyone — winning a game they shouldn't have. More »
    03/20/09
    17,935
    93

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by Craig Eshericks Mustache: @Dustin White: Did you read the fucking story before posting that? How about clicking on the link for "the... 10 Responses | Other threads

  • March Madness

    Your Bracket Is Already Sweating Buckets

    03/19/09
    1,876
    16
  • March Madness

    The Few. The Proud. The Foolish.

    Well, today's the big day. Sixteen NCAA games, sixteen live blogs. If you're stuck working today or tonight, you can, I guess, "watch" the game from here. More »
    03/19/09
    6,823
    44

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by Tully Blanchard Enterprises: I wholeheartedly approve of the Homestar Runner graphic, and feel we need more of these 10 Responses | Other threads

  • March Madness

    Type Fast For Us During the NCAA Tournament

    Aw, so you didn't get to preview the team you wanted. Guess there's nothing left to do but cry. Or you could GET A SECOND CHANCE to participate on Deadspin. More »
    03/15/09
    8,569
    117

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by Shakey: Can I glog instead? [www.cbssports.com] 11 Responses | Other threads

  • Jeff Reed

    Revisiting Jeff Reed's Paper Towel Freakout: An Investigative Report

    You're probably thinking to yourself, "Hey, did they ever fix the towel dispenser that Jeff Reed broke?" That or you were thinking of pie. Quite often it's pie. More »
    02/26/09
    14,532
    70

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by VTBen: Fuck Sheetz. This would have never happened at a Wawa. /eastern PA pride 17 Responses | Other threads

  • Live Blog

    The Slam Dunk Contest Live Blog, Where Everything's Between 9 And 10

    Also, everything's worth two points and millionaire athletes break out an arsenal of props that would make Carrot Top blush. Sounds like fun! More »
    02/14/09
    16,723
    662

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by Business_Socks: What has two thumbs and dropped $130.00 on v-day dinner and is probably still going sexless tonight b/c my lady... 24 Responses | Other threads

  • Live Blogs

    Super Bowl XLIII Live Blog: The Battle To Legitimize Already-Printed Merchandise

    Whose team will reign supreme? The guys whose fans wave towels or the guys whose state has vowels? Which QB wins: the one who found Christ or whose appendix was sliced? More »
    02/01/09
    44,071
    834

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by Andy Hutchins: Bruce just sold a half-million albums with that performance. And Lil Wayne's rock album will beat his. 11 Responses | Other threads

  • Live Blog

    The NFC Championship Live Blog, Done Right (Not With Tagged Posts)

    Will it be the desert dwellers or the East coast fellers? Which nine-win team reigns supreme? This and much more Iron Chef-style prose to follow in the live blog, aprez le jump. More »
    01/18/09
    33,920
    1019

    By Matt Sussman

    Comment by carig: I have just discovered I am now living in a town that sells no alcohol at restaurants on Sundays. I... 49 Responses | Other threads

  • Bcs championship 2009 live blog

    Hugs For Everyone

    01/08/09
    387
    0
  • Bcs championship 2009 live blog

    That Referee's Heart Disease Is Magically Cured

    01/08/09
    276
    0
  • Bcs championship 2009 live blog

    Also He Got An A-Minus On A Spelling Test In Fourth Grade

    01/08/09
    225
    0
  • Bcs championship 2009 live blog

    If They Dump It On Tebow's Head, It'll Turn To Wine

    01/08/09
    200
    1
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