parker91 commented on This Week in Love

"Just stay far away from Ben Stein and his money this time and everything will be all right."

parker91 commented on A Season Of Failure, Graphical Edition

"@dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac: At least that's an improvement from their previous physician, Dr."

parker91 commented on Suddenly, Everyone Cares About Delaware Again

"Tell you what, Delaware, you can keep the gambling, but in exchange, you gotta get rid of the goddamn toll plaza."

parker91 commented on What Are You Watching Tonight?

"I chose the NHL, for the sole reason of wanting to hear the bell go off when the officials count to six tonight."

parker91 commented on Yes, That Is A Horse In Vogue

"@JoePa's Eye Dr.: Do you really think the guy in the $3,000 suit is going to let the horse who just made a millions just shit all over him like that?"

parker91 commented on How Conan O'Brien Ruined The Stanley Cup Finals

"It figures that a league that is run by Count Chocula would let the guy from the Lucky Charms box screw up his signature event."

parker91 commented on Patriots Team Up With State Lotto; NFL Conveniently Forgets That It Pretends To Hate Gambling

"The Bills should do a similar promotion with Yolanda Vega."

parker91 commented on Barry Melrose Looks A Little Medium Rare

"Somewhere, the manager of Hull City doesn't think that tan is fake enough."

parker91 commented on Manny Ramirez Releases His Statement On Suspension

"You know, if he went off and consulted with Dr."

parker91 commented on Introducing The Deadspin Comment Of The Week (Now With 100% More Prizes!)

"I don't understand the significance of the photo."