I understand that when you see a foul ball coming towards you, you can get a rush of blood to the head. Everyone wants to make a dope catch on a foul ball. “You did it!” they’ll say, “You made the big catch!” The Pirates will call you up and offer you a tryout because you made a sweet frickin’ baseball catch.

Advertisement

But none of that’s going to come true if you don’t pass off your nachos and tall boy first. Instead, you’re gonna end up wearing the nachos, dropping your $11 beer, and missing out on the baseball. Sorry bud.

The path to greatness is strewn with nacho-stained t-shirts.