http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/base/img/thumbs140x140/deadspin.com.png http://deadspin.com/tag/plaxico burress shot himself in the leg http://deadspin.com/tag/plaxico burress shot himself in the leg

If you're looking for a bedtime story for your children tonight, may we suggest the felony criminal complaint of one Plaxico M. Burress. (It needs the initial, don't you think?) It's very short, but also very compelling and there's a life lesson in there for all of us. Namely, put down the wine before "fidgeting" with your waistband. Our favorite moment: "Informant then heard a 'pop' sound and defendant stated in substance 'Take me to a hospital.'" Am I the only one who wants to see this scene re-enacted with the robots from Wall-E? More »
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