Marshall wideout Aaron Dobson is making a splash in Patriots camp, lining up with the first-team offense and projecting to be one of Tom Brady's targets in a depleted New England offense. His Twitter account, on the other hand, is having an identity crisis.
His verified account was, until now, pretty standard. Lots of retweets, the occasional photo, and a daily horoscope, automatically posted by a service he signed up for. But just around noon today, the ghost in the machine woke up.
(The tweets below have since been deleted.)
This is not his # anymore. I have had this # since last Wednesday. I would appreciate it if this all stopped. Thank you.— Aaron Dobson 3 (@aarondobson17) August 12, 2013
Idk what's going on... Everyone of these messages are coming straight to my personal phone.— Aaron Dobson 3 (@aarondobson17) August 12, 2013
Yet— Aaron Dobson 3 (@aarondobson17) August 12, 2013
I don't even have a twitter— Aaron Dobson 3 (@aarondobson17) August 12, 2013
This is crazy... Especially since I'm not Aaron— Aaron Dobson 3 (@aarondobson17) August 12, 2013
We have no idea what's happening. (Our best guess is that Dobson had his twitter account directly linked to his text messaging, and once he got a new number—and someone else got his old number—all the @-replies to Dobson started going straight to some poor schmo's phone. And that schmo's texts are showing up on Dobson's Twitter account.)
The alternative, which we very much fear is true, is that Dobson's Twitter account has gained sentience, and is discovering the painful questions that come with identity. Why am I here? What is love? Does my follower count have intrinsic worth if I advertise myself as #teamfollowback?