Deadspin
You know, when you're talking group sex, you're obviously talking about Ohio. This is something the Cincinnati Bearcats like to call "an eight-on-one drill."
According to the Feb. 14 letter, the sex acts took place during a party at which alcohol was served, the sex acts were videotaped and the tapes have been circulated in UC dormitories.
The allegation concerns eight football players and a former female soccer player at the school, though we're not sure if the "former" refers to her status as a student, her status as a soccer player or her status as a woman. (Or all three!) The video is supposedly circulating around the Cincinnati campus and it's only a matter until Marvin Lewis starts showing it to potential draftees.
Bearcats Bracing After Bareback Bash? [Every Day Should Be Saturday]
(UPDATE: Here's letter that started it all.) (PDF)
Comments
8 dicks + 1 chick = Tru Luv 4eva!
Now that's teamwork. *rimshot*
I'll be here all week. Don't forget to tip your webmaster.
talk about a clusterfuck...
It can also be referred to as an Octagon.
strictly for reference purposes
http://www.netitor.com/photos/schools/cinn/sports/w-soccer...
The video is supposedly circulating around the Cincinnati campus
Isn't this why Baby Jesus invented Pornotube? C'mon, UC students. Step up!
At this moment, Carl Monday is grabbing his trench coat and dashing off to Cincinnati for another investigative report.
That must have been tough, because she couldn't use her hands.
(Although I am all for people getting their freak-on.)
Ah, Cinti...from the Bengals down to the Bearcats..it's only a matter of time until a sex tape emerges from a primary school in Mt. Healthy.
Will, I hope you're going to reimburse Mike Cooper for the keyboard that this story just caused him to ruin.
In other news... WHAT THE FUCK, OHIO?
Love the graphic there. Note that "#40" is in fact "Dead Last in the Survey", a well-deserved honor having been single and living in Cincy at one point in my life.
That's exactly how I wanted Necessary Roughness to end.
this is just proof that there are entirly too many cameras out there, and we are doing too much to encourage stupid people to film their exploits.
And God I love every minute of it.
Plus, I think her status should be updated from "former soccer player" to "inside out porcupine"
Anyone??? Is this thing on???
That's funny. I thought UC football didn't know how to score.
As the good people at Vivid Video taught me, sometimes women get into this type of thing.
any more than a 3-to-1 ratio... is... not good.
Ohio native here. (shaking head)
1.) Vag
2.) Butt
3.) Mouth
4.) Left ear
5.) Right ear
6.) Left nostril
7.) Right nostril
8.) Umm...pee hole???
Yeah, that makes sense.
Kinda makes me wanna watch Havoc. Come for the Anne Hathaway Boobies, stay for the Bijou Phillips gang rape scene
@badbabu:
I believe it would actually be an Octopussy
Ohio native here. (shaking head)
1.) Vag
2.) Butt
3.) Mouth
4.) Left ear
5.) Right ear
6.) Left nostril
7.) Right nostril
8.) Umm...pee hole???
Yeah, that makes sense.
LLLB...doing God's work...
Fred Smoot believes the gauntlet to have been laid down. He will not fail.
Phoenix is #1 for culture and #2 for nightlife? PHOENIX?!?!?!
http://www.forbes.com/lists/2006/3/06singles_Best-Cities-F...
LLLB- you apparently have never heard of "DVDA", because right there you knock out four of the players. Throw one in each hand, one in the mouth, and the requisite guy wacking it off to the side, and there you go, 8 dudes.
Tim Hardaway most definitely approves of this behavior unless swords were crossed.
Who wouldnt watch that?
"Cost of living alone."
I know most of us do it, but how depressing a stat does that sound?
+1 to 44 in a Row for making a co-worker wonder what the hell is going on.
The eight players are collectively known as the O-Line.
How many posts do we need to get to the level of post-feminism this represents?
(The answer is not eight.)
What's a gangbang?
@TheStarterWife: +1
UC, where sloppy eighths are encouraged.
@HeavyPettingZoo: would your suggestion be "DVDA HJX2 BJ & WO"
Sager Bombs:
Top Row:
I wouldn't, I would, wouldn't, wouldn't, would, would, wouldn't, wouldn't, wouldn't, wouldn't, would, would, wouldn't, would, wouldn't, wouldn't, I think that's a guy, wouldn't, would on a dare.
Bottom Row:
I would, I wouldn't, wouldn't, would, would, would, wouldn't, wouldn't, wouldn't, would, would, would, would, would, would, would.
Actually I might do the coaches just for the story. I wouldn't enjoy it.
not impressed
sincerely,
the 7th Floor Crew and that kid in Georgia serviing 10 yrs for statutory rape
@scumdog0331:
That should be the first play from scrimmage UC runs next season.
Let's hope Gangbangapalooza 2007 doesn't rope in Mark Dantonio. MSU couldn't handle it.
you mean there are people out there who don't like to get their freak on?
Cincinnati looks better and better everyday.
The tape's pretty awful, sadly; Billy Crystal insisted on opening with a song-and-dance number.
Well, at this explains all those pesky "Salisbury to be named Cincy QB Coach" rumors...
I would think it would be better recruiting practices to provide more variety to the recruits than one solitary soccer player. Do the Volleyball and track teams not care about UC football recruiting or what?
@UkraineNotWeak: I'm sure Tim of all people knows it's not gay unless your balls touch.
I'm sure the UC coaching staff will be breaking down the film and grading the players on their performance.
I can't believe I didn't think of "DVDA." Speaking of videos going around the dorms...when I was in college, Sylvia Saint's "DA" was a big hit with the network. I still like the nostrils though.
So it's safe to assume someone is working on getting us a copy of this, right?
Those are some exceptional ball-handling skills on display by the Bearcats soccer team.
If only the basketball team were that good at hitting the hole...
There simply HAS to be some kind of Nick Lachey joke in this somewhere...
"How come you guys never call me anymore?"
-Mark Chmura
Somebody get that girl a Wet-Nap™
and maybe some penicillin.
Man, I hate sloppy sevenths.
@SagerBombs: Based on that picture, I'm going with the 5th one from the right (not counting the coach).
Will, please, please, make the rest of the posts today hockey related so no one pays attention to them and we can revel in this gift from the baby jebus all night!!!
"How come you guys never call me anymore?"
-Mark Chmura
Prince. Love it.
... Also, too bad Chewy played for the Vikes's arch-rival, because otherwise, he needed -- nay, owed the world, & the United States -- to be on that Sex Boat.
@Tuffy: four. Feminism says this is bad, post-fem rejects feminism's premise that it's bad, post-post says it's empowering, postx3 says despite consent, it's exploitative and reps the patriarchy, and postx4 would totally get on board with this if she could find eight guys.
I wonder if this chick got tips from that former Arizona State cheerleader who went into porn.
Or maybe that louisville cheerleader whose 'pics' ended up all over the web.
God bless the internets.
Sager: That is probably the least attractive soccer team I have ever seen (and it looks like the freshman squad)...
but I agree with LWB, 5th from the right in the bottom row seems like the one...
Chinese fingercuffs. Times 4.
Because I watched this movie last night...
Joe Young: You see, when the Mormons first arrived, they didn't have any money...
DVDA Porn Actress: They should've done DVDA.
Joe Young: DVDA?
DVDA Porn Actress: Yeah, double-vaginal double-anal. It's the only way a woman of my age will get work in this industry. If you don't think that splits me open like a turkey on Thanksgiving...
Here's the 2006 roster: http://grfx.cstv.com/photos/schools/cinn/sports/w-soccer/a...
Listed as seniors:
#2 Ashley Roush MF/D
#3 Jessica Legge MF
#7 Anna Farmer F
#8 Becky Imhoff MF
#12 Anna Barrett MF
#17 Heather Haney F/D
#19 Kate Morton MF/D
The media guide insists that Haney will "contribute both offensively and in the backfield."
Just sayin'.
"we're not sure if the "former" refers to her status as a student, her status as a soccer player or her status as a woman."
No she's still a woman...a real woman. This just confirms it.
And by woman I mean slut.
Soccer player, really? You would think the football team could have done better than that, no?
Took me while to move past the mental imagery of the story and onto those nightlife rankings, but those things are a crock. Chicago- 38th in nightlife?! There are more happening bars across from my condo on Division than in all of Phoenix.
the bengals are not impressed by this. you know what the bengals call 8 on 1 sex? tuesday afternoon.
Spanky: It just has to be Jessica (Gigi) Ernst...and she is listed as "...one of the team's best ball winners"
This def. should have been the last post of the day for the late nighter