Daunte Culpepper

NFL

Daunte Culpepper's Rather Depressing Email Retirement

The starnge, sometimes brilliant career of quarterback Daunte Culpepper — who played Butch to Randy Moss' Sundance in six seasons with the Vikings — has announced his retirement. It wasn't at a press conference, but in an email to NFL.com reporter Adam Schefter. Replaced by Trent Green in Miami, a backup with the Raiders ... yeah, that would do it for me too. And so that one guy in your fantasy pool who always drafts a big name free agent in the hopes that he'll pull out a Comeback Player of the Year season is foiled again. I hated that guy anyway. More »

12:45 PM on Thu Sep 4 2008
By Rick Chandler
5,601 views, 51 comments

Most discussed Sports-Pun: He's retiring from email? What's he gonna use to communicate, signal flags? more »

fantasy madness

The Fantasy Assassins

Considering most of you — unless you happened to draft using Yahoo's fantasy game last night — have already held your fantasy football drafts, you are, today, in the lone moment over the next three months when you won't be tinkering with your team. Right now, you are strong; your team is awesome! And then ... More »

3:00 PM on Wed Sep 5 2007
By Leitch
9,733 views, 99 comments

Latest by J. Walter Weatherman: @Rob Iracane: DITTO to that Iracane. I wouldn't touch Shawn with Shaquille Oneal's 10 foot newly ring-less pole. more »

nfl

An Odd Way To Get Your Coach Off Your Back

Because we're just the kind of sniggering, obnoxious, wisenheimer 14-year-olds you think we are, we thought we'd giggle a bit this morning at Steelers lineback Joey Porter, who is in serious danger of becoming a staple around these parts. More »

11:00 AM on Fri Sep 8 2006
By Leitch
532 views, 66 comments

nfl

Culpepper Now Free To Have Naked Women Dance In His General Vicinity (But There, And Only There)

New Dolphins quarterback Daunte Culpepper need not worry about the potential new ramifications of the term "lap dance" from jail; he has been cleared of all charges in the sex boat incident. His former teammate Moe Williams was not so lucky; he'll still have to strand trial, along with decidedly more ribald charges against Fred "Double Header" Smoot and Bryant McKinnie. More »

5:45 PM on Tue Apr 4 2006
By Leitch
2,059 views, 3 comments

Latest by The Big Picture: you've gotta think ricky williams needs to get in on this somehow. perhaps he likes double-dippers too and they can more »

nfl

What Is A Lap Dance? You Know, In An Existential Sense, Aren't We All Just God's Lap Dancers?

So the Vikings sex boat trial in Minnesota is going on, like, right now. Well, kind of; former quarterback Daunte Culpepper and fullback Moe Williams are trying to talk a judge into dismissing charges against them. The two players were charged, pretty much, with receiving lap dances, which has spun our legal system into motion: They've spent all morning attempting to define what a "lap dance" is. It's pretty great. More »

4:40 PM on Wed Mar 22 2006
By Leitch
952 views, 16 comments

Latest by Full Metal Slacker: I got married in Minneapolis, and now I am remembering the complete lack of fun that it provides as a more »

nfl

Culpepper To Spend Plenty Of Time Near Water

The Orlando Sentinel and FOX Sports are reporting that the trade is official: Daunte Culpepper has been traded to the Miami Dolphins. More »

2:02 PM on Tue Mar 14 2006
By Leitch
292 views, 16 comments

nfl

The Sex Boat Story Will Never Go Away. Awesome.

Is it possible to ever get tired of the Vikings sex boat story? We think it's not. We're pretty sure, actually. More »

2:15 PM on Thu Mar 2 2006
By Leitch
1,902 views, 6 comments

nfl

Culpepper: Lap Dances? Who, Me?

We don't want to overstate — and it probably won't happen, anyway — but if Vikings sex boat gods Daunte Culpepper and Bryant McKinnie get their way, we might be in for the real trial of the century. More »

11:00 AM on Wed Jan 4 2006
By Leitch
364 views, 11 comments

nfl

The Vikings Meet The Seventh Floor Crew

Sometimes, someone comes up with a concept that's so perfectly in our sweet spot that we can merely stand up and salute, and that's really saying something, because we spend the whole day on our ass. More »

11:15 AM on Mon Dec 19 2005
By Leitch
683 views, 4 comments

nfl

Your Takes On The Sex Boat Wrapup

We love doing this site, but, to be honest, what we might love the most are you, the readers. Your comments are the highlights of our days, and not just because you're funnier than we are. We thought we'd take this opportunity to showcase our personal favorite slices of hilarity from today's earlier post about the Vikings' sex boat. And thank you. More »

2:52 PM on Fri Dec 16 2005
By Leitch
282 views, 6 comments

Latest by Trackback: Per Mark Maske at the Post: Many NFL team officials say they will be less likely to draft players who more »

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