Dibs on the first available liver.

I'm sorry Bo Jackson...I am for reeeeeal

It's like R. Kelly says "So Homie Don't Bring Your Girl To Meet Me Cuz I'm A Flirt".

Mr. Jackson is one of the finest video game athletes of the past two decades, and we apologize if the article served in any way to call into question his athletic video game accomplishments throughout his career.

fixed and corroborated

(Sorry ahead of time, Rob, but...)

I'm not even really a big Seinfeld fan, but that is certainly one of the funniest sitcom episodes I've ever seen.

I wonder what the market value for silence is nowadays. I mean, if it's for shutting up about seeing a married athlete hooking up, I can't imagine it being too high (10K). But for a guy on parole not wanting to go back, it's gotta be at least six-figures.

@metschick:

R Kelly is something that rhymes with "flirt," but "flirt" is not that word I'd have in mind.

Joe Posnanski is the most with that.

@Encouraging Referee Pitman: If it's not "hurt", put that on my to-do list.

I would like to apologize to Will Leitch for the assertion that his recent "glogging" was due to the use of anabolic steroids. This was reported by an anonymous informant (cough*Daulerio*cough), and was unfortunately not corroborated. Mr. Leitch is a patron of the arts and a fine human being, and I apologize if this has caused him any pain.

@Encouraging Referee Pitman:

pert?

@Swellesley: I think Seinfeld references are still safe.

squirt?

Maybe the OSU Softball coach adopted the kid, just for organ harvesting.

Gregggg Doyel underrated? Me thinks not. He is Jim Rome without a crappy TV show (yet).

@Weed Against Speed: Whew.

I love when newspapers bury a guy on page 1, then apologize on page 45. Thats why you have to go with the alternative media.

@Weed Against Speed: Oh I'm sure, but he hates when people show their quote-recognition skills so as to impress their Deadspin peers, which I wanted to assure him I wasn't doing. I just love Puddy.

@metschick: That song is amazing in so many ways

Gooden is growing a rat tail. It is going to be awesome.

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