If you're the type of person who loves to listen to semi-panicked, mostly confused 911 calls from the wives of professional athletes, boy, are you ever in for a treat this morning.

The call that the woman — and police are insistent on not giving out the name of the woman or her "relationship" to Artest, even though the cops have been to their house five times since August — made is largely scrambled and bewildering, with the woman making references to events that she assumes the 911 operator knows about. (She seems to have initially called 911 to complain that Artest is taking her car.) You can hear the call right here. We always feel for the 911 operator when we hear "celebrity" calls like this; they never know when they're gonna take a call that ends up with their voice on the news. Though we suppose we feel for the lady being slapped a bit more.

Artest 911 Call [CBS-13]

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