You know who else is white? Larry Bird, the Pacers president and the whitest white boy of all time. In a league that is almost 90% non-white guys, Bird has assembled a roster that is 50% see-through and just drafted the whitest of white hopes, Tyler Hansborough. So what gives? Does Bird secretly have a thing for his pale brothers?

Red (Auerbach) never saw color. And I don't, either. I just pick them. If we hadn't taken Tyler Hansbrough, it would have been Ty Lawson. And if I could have gotten another pick (later in the first round), I would have taken Sam Young or Wayne Ellington."

So he's really just prejudiced in favor of Tar Heels? Anyway, Kravitz then points out that eight of Bird's 10 draft picks have been black and that he once famously said that he was insulted when teams tried to guard him with a white guy. So why would you even ask such a silly question?

In the end, it's not about black and white, but the bottom line is printed in black and white.

Wins and losses.

And nothing else matters.

Oh, so I guess he's not racist. He just loves to lose.

Bob Kravitz: Are Pacers too white? No, all Bird cares about are finding guys who can play [Indianapolis Star]

CBSSports.com's Gary Parrish has the story:

Turns out, there were at least two cameras rolling Monday night when Crawford dunked on James during a pick-up game here at the LeBron James Skills Academy. It was a two-handed jam, the kind that would've circulated quickly on YouTube. But Nike officials eliminated that possibility shortly after the dunk happened by allegedly confiscating tapes from various cameramen.

Freelance photographer Ryan Miller was one of the cameramen shooting the game.

He told CBSSports.com that Nike Basketball Senior Director Lynn Merritt took his tape.

"He just said, 'We have to take your tape,'" Miller said. "They took it from other guys, too."

Worth noting is that there is no policy against filming at the LeBron James Skills Academy, and Miller said he had been filming all day without incident. Nobody ever told him to stop. Nobody ever said there was a problem ... until after Crawford dunked on James.

"LeBron called Lynn over and told him something," Miller said. "That's how I knew his name was Lynn. LeBron said, 'Hey, Lynn. Come here.'"

Minutes later, Miller said Merritt demanded his tape.

"There's nothing I can think of besides LeBron just not wanting it online," Miller said. "It's a good story to tell people, I guess. But then again, I'm kind of pissed. I lost my tape."

If that's how it went down — if King James really sent a Swoosh drone to go all FBI-in-Dealey-Plaza on the cameramen — then that's surpassingly lame. Give the kid his YouTube moment. Congratulate him. Shake him by the hand. Or, you know, don't.

Nike does not want you to see that dunk [CBSSports.com]

Kobe said that after the Lakers lost game six of the '08 NBA Finals in Boston by 39 points, he was alone in the shower, just fuming. He heard somebody walk in and assumed it was one of his teammates, or maybe a staff member. Instead, he looked up, and it was Ron Artest (to this day, Kobe has no idea how Artest got into the locker room).

"I want to come help you," Artest said. "If I can, I'm going to find a way to come to LA and give you the help you need to win a title."

It's always been my experience that any job interview that ends with your future employer needing to put on a towel, is not one that leads to a healthy work environment. At that point, being "hoodalized" is the least of your problems.

Ireland: Artest Told Kobe He Was Coming To L.A. [CBS 2]
Signing Ron Artest is a smart move by Lakers [Los Angeles Times]

Ric Bucher says that Hedo did visit Portland, where a deal appeared all but certain, but ultimately decided that because Toronto was closer to his native Turkey, has a large Turkish population, and is a "cosmopolitan city"...

(pauses to sip mimosa, adjust monocle)

...it was the more attractive destination. Plus, he's already spent significant time in the city as co-host of The Basketball Jones.

Kind of strange how Hedo, a crucial cog in the Magic's run to the NBA Finals, ends up with the Raptors right after he gets replaced in Orlando by Vince Carter. And while some may blanche at the team giving $50 million plus to a thirty-year-old, even the faintest notion that he got pushed out the door for that über-talented marshmallow will be enough to endear him to Toronto fans forever.

Sources: Turkoglu headed to Toronto [ESPN]

Kobe and Artest: The 'Lost' Trash Talk from The Basketball Jones on Vimeo.

The Lakers enlivened their defense and their personality with the acquisition of Ron Artest. The Rockets decided to take a chance on the hot-tempered and baggage-toting Trevor Ariza. [SKEETS]

Jennings, who opted to play professionally in Italy last year rather than serve an unpaid internship in Arizona's backcourt, was last seen on Draft day making one of the more memorable sporting entrances not involving a paraglider. A few weeks ago, he lamely tried to play the dozens on Ricky Rubio's head. Many questions remain about him. Foremost among them now is whether he'll get John Hammond or Scott Skiles fired first.

Consider Jennings' exchange with a friend of his, rapper Joe Budden, about whom I know nothing but whom BlackSportsOnline helpfully describes as most famous for "putting his girl's ass on camera." BSO has the video for now. The Baseline's Chris Littmann has the heavily starred transcript:

On next season in Milwaukee ...

Budden: You better worry about Ramon Sessions, diggin' in your a**, pause.
Jennings: He's not going to be here. [inaudible] That money is going to Charlie.
Budden: N****, Ramon Sessions is gonna be there.
Jennings: I doubt it.
Budden: They ain't go no other guards.
Jennings: Ridnour.
Budden: N****, get that bum-a** n**** outta here.
Jennings: He's going to be a backup.
Budden: To who?
Jennings: To who? Who else n****?

On what happened on draft night ...

Budden: Who was hatin' on you?
Jennings: Jay Bilas.
Budden: What happened? You ran in the draft late or some dumb s*** like a loser?
Jennings: No, I was at the hotel. This is what happened right. My agent is like "Well, we ain't hear nothing .We ain't have no guarantee." So we makin' phone calls and s*** and n***** is saying like "The workouts is great and everything and he's the best point guard but we don't know yet, we just don't know."
Budden: They didn't say that about Rick Rubio, number one, and number two they didn't say you the best point guard. They said your jump shot is shaky, you got some potential, but your work ethic is bull****. You averaged 3 points.
Jennings: You're a liar. I know you're lying now.
Budden: I'm just telling you what they said.
Jennings: That ain't nothing but a college person.
Budden: Just tell me what happened. You end up running in the draft? I tunred it off after that.
Jennings: No, n****, I came out there and made my appearance n**** and I had the best appearance out of all them n******. And I was the best dressed, they said, by the way. I was the best dressed.

On whether he'll start next season ...

Budden: You think you gonna start for real though?
Jennings: I don't know, actually, I really don't know.
Budden: I heard that n**** Scott Skiles is an a**h***.
Jennings: That n**** tough, that n**** tough though. There must be a reason he liked me. There must be a reason.

On Ricky Rubio and the Knicks ...

Budden: Let me know when Minnesota get there. So I can watch Rubio light your f****** a** up. I never seen a n**** hate on Rubio so much.
Jennings: [inaudible]
Budden: You know what's funny? You're the only guard in the draft talking s*** about Rubio.
Jennings: The other n***** are scared.
Budden: What are you going to do when Rubio comes to the Knicks?
Jennings: Rubio is not coming, they are not giving up Rubio. You got Jordan Hill, you happy with that?
Budden: I don't really know enough about Jordan Hill to be happy ... I'm happy with Toney Douglas.
Jennings: I know they were booing this n****.
Budden: What does that mean? They boo everybody n****.
Jennings: If it was Stpehen Curry, them n***** would've went crazy in there.
Budden: Shut the f*** up, you don't even know nothing about New York basketball.
Jennings: F*** the Knicks, them n***** skipped out on me.
Budden: Oh man, you feel to the Knicks like I do about Jay-Z? [Laughs] Yo, the Knicks is your Jay-Z?
Jennings: F*** the Knicks, them n***** is always going to be weak.
Budden: This is where I f****** hang up on your f****** ass for talking stupid.
Jennings: Duhon ain't gonna get it done.

I know we're all supposed to be deeply appalled at the immodesty of our basketball youth, but you have to marvel at the sheer ballsiness of a 19-year-old who puts himself in his GM's shoes and non-tenders one player and demotes another, all on his own account. Jennings, I fear, is doomed to spend a long year in Coach Tough N****'s crowded doghouse.

Brandon Jennings & Joe Budden Prove Why They Both Are Potential Busts [BlackSportsOnline]
Social Media Biting Back at Brandon Jennings? [The Baseline]

Five teams for Shaq, and five times his teammate has been one of the best in the league. A swingman, two 2-guards, a point guard, and now a small forward. Four MVPs between them, and Dwyane Wade and Penny both finished as high as third. The image of Shaq in recent years is that of the reliable big man brought in to free up the star and put in a few points and grab a few boards while he's at it.

It wasn't always like this. The Magic built around Shaq. They added Penny to make him better. O'Neal led his team in scoring seven out of his first nine seasons, until someone named Kobe took over the Lakers.

We forget this now, but there was a big debate over who to build the Lakers around. Shaq had an MVP award of his own, and should have had two or three others. As late as 2001-02 — the final year of the Lakers' threepeat — O'Neal led the team in ppg.

It's impossible to judge him by how he'll perform with LeBron. He's 37 years old, with 17 seasons under his belt (and on his knees). But how will history judge Shaquille O'Neal? Will he be the big-man-for-hire, brought in to put teams over the top? Will we remember him drawing defenders and pulling down rebounds, creating more shots for Penny, Kobe, D-Wade, Nash and LeBron? Or will we remember him as a star in his own right?

I'm not sure Shaq really cares. Bill Russell was never the focal point of his own offense, instead playing a support role for Havlicek, Heinsohn and Cousy. If we remember him like we remember Bill Russell, I think that's good enough for Shaq.

*****

Thanks for your continued support of Deadspin. Like Ulysses, we made it home.

L.A. somehow scraped together enough cash for a victory parade this week, but it started an hour late. Whence the delay? A catfight between Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa (best known for nailing not one, but two local reporters) and Kobe over who would receive the undiluted hosannas of Angelenos:

The cause of the hold-up was occurring adjacent to the locker room, where Kobe was refusing to ride on the City Council bus because the mayor was to ride on it. At the same time, the mayor, the consummate spotlight thief, was refusing to get on the City Council bus unless he got on with Kobe. Kobe loudly denounced the mayor in phrases that started with "I don't like the …" and ended with "I'm not going to let him pimp my popularity!"

A compromise was reached when...well, a compromised was never reached. Kobe boarded the bus, and his teammates sneaked the mayor on behind his back. That's him above, the tiny little man in the fuschia tie.

But wait, there's more!

As the team bus approached Georgia Street, it was greeted by about 100 city workers who had labored throughout the previous day and night preparing the Coliseum for the rally. The bus stopped in front of them and the hard-working crew went ballistic for the team and shouted and cheered like they'd lost their minds. Then the mayor popped up from among the players and waved to the group, which suddenly turned silent, as if a spigot had been turned off.

...

Then, people in the Coliseum who knew nothing about the outside bus dust-up and the Georgia Street snub, had their own tale to tell: They say the mayor introduced the members of the team and after he introduced Kobe, he extended his hand for the customary shake and Kobe strode right past him ignoring the outstretched hand.

Now, all this info is coming from something called the Los Angeles Wave, so, grain of salt and all that. But does this sound particularly out of character for either of them?

The image associated with this post is best viewed using a browser.Blake Griffin, No. 1

Patti says: "He's not even really wanting to shake hands with the commissioner. He's not turning his body or extending his arm out. The commissioner has to do all the work. It ends up looking like Blake Griffin is holding a baseball bat rather than shaking a hand."

Hasheem Thabeet, No. 2

Patti says: "Hasheem looks like a parent looking at a child. His facial expression, his smile is not, 'Ooh, this is an honor.' It's, 'Oh, you're a little boy, commissioner.' His outer hand is on the commissioner's arm. That's a power handshake. That shows he feels powerful, in control. He's literally making him move the way he wants him to move."

Tyreke Evans, No. 4

Patti says: "Tyreke has his shoulders back and away, but his head is down. This is a conflicted movement. He's not comfortable and happy and in the moment. He's just kind of awkward. The commissioner looks much more confident, sure of himself. But Tyreke looks like he doesn't know what he's supposed to do. That index finger is really significant. You put out that finger when you're a little bit fearful."

Ricky Rubio, No. 5

Patti says: "He's shy. Even though he has a nice smile on his face, there's some stiffness to it. He's happy, but there's tension in this moment for him. The one thing that he is doing: He's giving a really nice, full handshake. He's connected to the commissioner. The other guys, it was more for show."

Jonny Flynn, No. 6

Patti says: "This is my favorite. He's not only joyful, but his whole body is leaning in toward the commissioner. He's actually putting weight on the commissioner, letting go of some of his power with that huge slant. He's lifting the commissioner's hand up a little bit as he's doing this. This is a totally different level of warmth."

Stephen Curry, No. 7

Patti says: "He's totally off-balance in this moment, and you see that throughout the whole body. His left arm is out to his side, reaching in the other direction — it's like he wants to be someplace else. There's a lot of tension around the head. He's not happy. He's feeling very awkward and doesn't want to be in this place."

Tyler Hansbrough, No. 13

Patti says: "This is the first one where we've seen a lot of stiffness around the commissioner's mouth. He's forcing a smile. Maybe he's been doing handshakes for awhile and has to fake it. And Tyler is just kind of, 'Uhhhh, God.'"

Jrue Holiday, No. 17

Patti says: "Wow. His posture is so different. That's the posture of somebody who was in the ROTC or the church, or who was raised by someone religious. Very erect, very proud bearing. His clasp on the commissioner is very warm. It surrounds the hand. He's not mad. He's not upset. He's not super-happy. He's just more self-contained and just very respectful."

Esteve Rubio's son Ricky, the basketball Jonas, was drafted fifth last night by the Timberwolves, who took another point guard, Jonny Flynn, with their very next pick. Esteve didn't waste any time declaring the Rubio camp dissatisfied with the night's events. Here's The New York Times' rendering of his comments:

Rubio's father, Esteve, cast serious doubt about Rubio's future with the Timberwolves, telling the Spanish Web site Marca.com, "Right now, Ricky is likely staying in Europe one or two years." He added, "We have to talk to the people in Minnesota and see what happens" and "we could be in Minnesota or somewhere else."

All the knowing coves think this could be prelude to a trade with the Knicks. The Timberwolves aren't budging, and already new president of basketball operations David Kahn is confusing the hell out of everyone, just like the last guy.

Esteve Rubio: "Ahora mismo, es muy probable que Ricky se quede uno o dos años en Europa" [MARCA.com]
Draft buzz: Trading game [Yahoo!]

We're reading from top to bottom tonight.

Recent Picks

11. New Jersey Nets: Terrance Williams, Louisville. TWill has a versatile game that will serve him well for years in the league. I'm starting to like the Nets a lot more, and that scares me a little.

12. Charlotte Bobcats: Gerald Henderson, Duke. It's a well known fact that Charlotte's scouts do not travel outside the state of North Carolina. At least Henderson can score. How he matches up against other shooting guards is the real question.

13. Indiana Pacers: Tyler Hansbrough, UNC. Damn, Woj finally missed one. The Pacers are whiter than French Lick.

14. Phoenix Suns: Earl Clark, Louisville And the run on Cardinals commences! Clark isn't there but Bradon Jennings decided to come out to say hello. Big surprise, he and Stern are both wearing purple ties.

WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON WITH ALL THE DAMN PURPLE?

Trade Update

The trade can't be made official until free agency begins, but nobody cares about that. What matters is that Stephen Curry is going to be heading for Phoenix and Amar'e Stoudemire will head to Golden State. Andris Biedrins is the other big component in the proposed deal.

15. Detroit Pistons: Austin Daye, Gonzaga Daye doesn't strike me (or anyone) as classic Piston. Regardless, he has a smooth game and a lot of that ever so precious upside. Not to mention all the length. Yes, we must mention the length. Because he's long, you see.

Oh good, I've been wondering what Dickie V has to say. What's that, he likes Hansbrough and Curry? WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL US SOONER, DICKIE? One of them can flat out play, the other can flat out shoot. I'll let you figure out which is which.

Oh God, don't let my boy Blair go to the Bulls. That's Washington and Pitt homerism right there.

Anyone who doesn't love Brandon Jennings is a terrorist. Flat out.

16. Chicago Bulls: James Johnson, Wake Forest /pumps fist. Upside. Length. Kickboxing champion. How could the Bulls pass on all that?

Steve Kerr is don of the purple mafia. Quit being so coy!

17. Philadelphia 76ers: Jrue Holiday, UCLA. Well it's about damn time. He struggled mightily for stretches last year under Ben Howland, but he is a beast. I certainly didn't think he'd be the last man in the green room.

Why are these interview chairs so damn big? Everybody looks like they're getting swallowed.

Stu Scott with the solid nugget about Jrue being the girl's tennis team's manager in high school. Great gig. Lofty gig.

Minnesota pretty much has to go Lawson right her, yes? Then they can pretend like they're not going to trade any of their point guards.

18. Minnesota Timberwolves: Ty Lawson, UNC HOLY SHIT! Okay, they might have to make a trade or two. That makes three point guards taken this round by the Wolves. Somewhere Bill Simmons is telling somebody how he should have been running this draft.

And now we have confirmation that Ty Lawson will be the odd man out. He's heading to Denver by way of Charlotte. Or something. It's a good pickup for the Nuggets, and it's the perfect spot in the draft to make a move for him.

19. Atlanta Hawks: Jeff Teague, Wake Forest. That's a perfect fit for the Hawks. Teague will fit into that offense nicely, and give them a huge boost off the bench. Something former first rounder Acie Law never could do on a consistent basis.

Ernie Grunfeld, the time is now. Move up with the 32nd pick and take DeJuan Blair. You can make it happen. You turned Kwame Brown into Caron Butler.

20. Utah Jazz: Eric Maynor, VCU Bilas is sad to tell you that Maynor is neither long, nor athletic. Then again, if he were those things the Jazz probably wouldn't have drafted him.

The Knicks fans are now booing Larry Brown. This surprises no one.

21. New Orleans Hornets: Darren Collison, UCLA. And there goes the Bruin backcourt. Collison is an ideal backup to Chris Paul. I can't believe these teams are passing on Blair.

DeMar seems ready to erase some bad memories in Toronto.

Portland traded up to the 22nd spot, but it might be too late. Yahoo! is saying that they were eying Collison with that pick.

22. Portland Trailblazers: Victor Claver, Spain A lanky ginger who can really play. The Blazers are fortunate enough to have no glaring needs, so they can draft for the future this year.

Finally, the Shaq interview. The Big Witness starts things off with some condolences to the Jackson family. At first I thought he was threatening Phil, then again I'm an idiot.

It's funny because Mike Brown is going to get fired.

23. Sacramento Kings: Omri Casspi, Israel Fuck yeah! Mazel, Omri. Mazel. I'm loving Sacramento tonight. They've made two awesome players tonight. Ziller better be pumped.

Breaking news out of Gawker headquarters: Perez Hilton is a douchetard.

24. Dallas Mavericks: BJ Mullens, Ohio State. That...that's not a good pick. Somebody had to take the big toolsy youngster, but Dallas has been burned by some raw big men in the past.

...and Blair continues to fall. Seven more picks. That's all I ask.

Hell, even if Oklahoma City does pass on him Chicago is right there.

25. Oklahoma City Thunder: Rodrigue Beaubois, France. The Thunder are passing this pick on to Dallas in exchange for BJ Mullens. Now things are making some sense.

The Knicks are pushing hard to land Rubio, but so far Minnesota isn't budging. The Wolves have them by the balls, and it's fun. (via Yahoo!)

26. Chicago Bulls: Taj Gibson, USC. Oh lord, that's an awful pick. Unless DeJuan Blair's knees are filled with sawdust this is ludicrous.

Oh and Sam Young is still around, just sayin'. The guy did have his arm impaled at the combine. Didn't really bother him.

This is a perfect spot for Sam Young or DaJuan Summers. The analysts were just discussing how they need a small forward who can provide some scoring.

27. Memphis Grizzles: DeMarre Carroll, Missouri Well the Grizzles will certainly be scrappier.

Okay Minnesota, Nick Calathes. Do it. Do it now.

David Stern is a rockstar.

28. Minnesota Timberwolves: Wayne Ellington, UNC Well at least he's a guard.

Uh, Lisa, they were calling Hansbrough overrated.

29. Los Angeles Lakers*: Toney Douglas, Florida State. *= not really. The Knicks are buying this pick, and they're trading Quentin Richardson for Darko. Darko in New York! A for Douglas, he's a bit of a beast, Knicks fans should take to him quickly.

30. Cleveland Cavaliers: Christian Eyenga, Congo Okay sure, why not? I don't think we'll be seeing him in next year's rotation.

That's it for the first round, say goodnight to Mr. Stern.

So yeah, one more pick before the Wizards. My favorite player is on the board. Team sure could use a rebounding power forward. Come on, Big Ern.

Hey Sacramento, I thought we were cool. Hurry the fuck up.

Don't try taking them on Silver, you'll lose.

31. Sacramento Kings: Jeff Pendergraph, Arizona State. Holy shit. Can't type. Shaking. Pendergraph? eh, not bad, low ceiling.

Trade Update

Pendergraph was traded to Portland for Sergio Rodriguez and the 38th pick. Good for them.

32. Washington Wizards: Jermaine Taylor, UCF. Ah, hell.

33. Portland Trailblazers: Dante Cunningham, Villanova That's a pretty full roster.

Yes, Stuart, we remember Darko. Not a lot of draft newbies sticking around for the second round.

Looks like the Wizards are going to trade that pick after all. I had a feeling they weren't going to add another guard. I can't believe they passed on Blair. Carl Landry better be involved in this trade.

34. Denver Nuggets: Sergio Llull, Spain. Apparently ESPN was at commercial.

35. Detroit Pistons: DaJuan Summers, Georgetown. The former Baltimore high school player of the year and Georgetown Hoya has a ton of skill, but he disappeared in a lot of big moments this past season.

36. Memphis Grizzles: Sam Young, Pitt Great pick, he'll help them immediately in a variety of ways. Great fundamentals, leaping ability, and an underrated outside shot. And yes, the pump fake.

37. San Antonio Spurs: DeJuan Blair, Pitt It's about fucking time, NBA. Of course the Spurs snatched him up. He's going to eat people alive, with or without some crappy ligaments. With Jefferson, Blair, and Mason I might start enjoying Spurs games. Plus Bowen is gone, so that helps.

38. Portland Trailblazers: John Brockman, Washington He's heading for Sacramento, because I'm pretty sure Portland has enough forwards.

The Wizards sold the pick for $2.5 million. That better be redistributed in the form of free beer for season ticket holders. So Houston know owns the rights to Jermaine Taylor. The scoring guard, not the super middleweight. Ernie Grunfeld says there's more news to come tomorrow.

Wow, Ricky Rubio sounds PUMPED to be in Minnesota!

Recent Picks

39. Detroit Pistons: Jonas Jerebko, Sweeden. Love the Swedes. Good people.
40. Charlotte Bobcats: Derrick Brown, Xavier. I'm surprised he lasted this long, he's solid.
41. Milwaukee Bucks: Jodie Meeks, Kentucky. Chucker.
42. Los Angeles Lakers: Patrick Beverley, Chicago via Ukraine. He's 20 and Fran seems to like him. My recollections are fairly vague.

The remaining fans at the draft are taking full advantage of the quiet atmosphere by yelling their own amusing answers to interview questions.

43. Miami Heat: Marcus Thornton, LSU Great pick for the Heat. He was one of the most underrated players in the country last year. He'll fit into their rotation nicely.

More Dickie V. Where did I leave that gravity bong?

Ah crap, I hate it when I agree with everything he says.

Okay Silver, stop saying "convey" every damn time.

44. Detroit Pistons: Chase Budinger Similar to what i said about Summers above. He has first round skill, but he spends way too much time standing still and waiting to shoot.

45. Minnesota Timberwolves: Nick Calathes, Florida. I get credit for predicting that the last time they picked. He could stick around and try to compete for time with Flynn and Rubio, or he could go play in Greece for a while.

46. Cleveland Cavaliers: Danny Green, UNC. The final Tar Heel is off the board. It's nice addition for the superheroes.

47. Minnesota Timberwolves: Henk Norel, Netherlands Ricky Rubio's teammate, and the third member of the same Spanish club's organization to be drafted tonight.

48. Phoenix Suns: Taylor Griffin, Oklahoma They can't do that, the Globetrotters called dibs! Apparently the Suns have a thing for crappy younger brothers.

49. Atlanta Hawks: Sergiy Gladyr, Ukraine. And this is where I begin to fade.

50. Utah Jazz: Goran Suton, Michigan State. It'd totally forgotten about him. He could be a useful bench player, but he probably won't see much time.

Stuart Scott just implied that Oleksiy Pecherov is an NBA player. That's adorable.

51. San Antonio Spurs: Jack McClinton, Miami Oh Spurs, you've won me over. He's a great shooter, and it will be on display all year long in the NBDL.

Trade Update

So maybe Thornton won't fit into that Miami rotation. Instead he's been shipped to New Orleans for two future second round picks.

52. Indiana Pacers: AJ Price, UConn At this point in the draft it's worth a shot. If the knee is okay he should be able to make an NBA roster.

53. San Antonio: Nando De Colo, France. I'm not familiar with him, so I'll give the Spurs the benefit of the doubt.

54. Charlotte Bobcats: Robert Vaden, UAB. They need scoring more than anything else, and they're going after it.

Trade Update

Chase Budinger to the Rockets for a future pick and cash. The Rockets are certainly opening their wallets tonight.

55. Portland Trailblazers: Patrick Mills, St. Mary's. Although I'm sure Patty's happy to be drafted, Portland probably isn't the ideal spot. He'll come in pretty low on that depth chart.

A smattering applause for a JCC reference.

56. Dallas Mavericks: Ahmad Nivins, St. Joe's. A double-double machine from the A10.

57. Phoenix Suns: Emir Preldzic, Serbia Bring on Fran! Verdict: Leave in Europe. Good to know.

So it's all Steve Nash's fault...

58. Boston Celtics: Lester Hudson, Tennessee-Martin

Trade Update

Beverley is CONVEYED to the Heat for a future pick.

Trade Update

Vaden was "traded" to the Thunder for cash.

59. Los Angeles Lakers: Chinemelu Elonu, Texas A&M.

60. Miami Heat: Robert Dozier, Memphis. NBDL. Not that there's anything wrong with it.

And that's going to do it for me tonight. Like Mark Jackson, I am fulfilled. Although I still can't believe the Wizards passed on Blair. I'll shut up about that one day, I'm sure. Thanks for stopping by.

MVP of the Draft: Brandon Jennings.

The Sacramento Bee's Sam Amick reports:

Rubio, who had planned on working out for the Kings last week before he became sick on the trip, took part in an individual workout that included Petrie and coach Paul Westphal and lasted approximately an hour. While the session remained secret at the request of his representatives, he told The Bee it was a necessary exercise that hardly showcased his game.

"It's difficult to show them what I have to do on the court, because there are no teammates and nobody there," Rubio said at the Sacramento airport just before leaving town. "I can't show them what I do on the court. This workout is not my style. I need my teammates around me to play basketball. I was alone."

Meanwhile, DraftExpress' Jonathan Givony believes the Kings, drafting fourth, were cooling on Rubio before the workout:

It's looking more and more clear that the Kings are not nearly as enamored with Ricky Rubio as they once were, for a number of reasons. The official party line is that Sacramento is concerned that Rubio will struggle to assert his leadership ability on the group of players they currently have in place, due to the fact that he's only 18 years old and not a native English speaker. One of the biggest issues Sacramento had last year was with the culture of their team lockerroom. On top of that, the Kings are worried that will Rubio will have a huge target on his chest coming into the NBA, and that other players will "try to go at him every single night."

Just days before the draft, Rubio remains its most fascinating story, if only for the various psychodramas that seem to spring up all around him. Consider this blog entry, from the Bee's Sam Amick, who marvels at the lengths to which grown men go to get a glimpse of the kid (and who, not incidentally, chased down Rubio at the airport to record three minutes of Spanish-accented mumbling). Amick uses the word "shame" four times.

Between this and Brandon Jennings' lame shit-talk and the Kings' assorted phantom concerns, I'd say Rubio has already had a substantial impact on the NBA. He hasn't played a minute yet and he's turned the whole damn league into a bunch of neurotics.

Kings finally get to see Rubio play [Sacramento Bee]

Among the other revelations: It sounds like poor Dirk was madly in love with Taylor, a grifter whom he supposedly called his "little jailbird." You Teutons out there can read the Bild interview here. For the rest of you, The Dallas Morning News has the recap:

According to the article, published on Bild's Web site Monday evening and due on newsstands today in Germany, Nowitzki has started to feel better about his private life recently.

"In the beginning, I was very down and disappointed, sad and furious," Nowitzki said. "But I made a few steps forward and I think someday I will be over it totally."

[...]

The Mavericks' perennial all-star verified that the couple met via an allegedly fluke phone call.

"She told me she dialed the wrong number and was trying to call her brother," Nowitzki said. "We talked, texted and e-mailed a lot over the next three years, but we never met. It was more of an Internet type of flirt.

"We had daily contact, then none for months. But we were friends for so long, we finally met and the first meeting was good. Then in December, we got engaged, but we didn't have a real date for the wedding. She had further plans and wanted to get married in July.

"She was an interesting woman. She was funny and never boring."

Nowitzki was asked about the mockery of Taylor's appearance in some of the unflattering photos that have been published.

"Well, everybody has different tastes," he said. "Some people love Italian food, some don't."

As for the emotional scars left by the difficult liaison, Nowitzki said: "I still want to have a family, but the wounds have to heal first. I want to raise a family and have a couple of small Dirks running around. But it will not be easy to win my heart."

I urge you to read the Babelfish translation, which better captures the felicities of the German tongue. Headline: "I groped in such a way in case of dear."

Dallas Mavericks' Nowitzki talks about relationship with ex-fiancée [The Dallas Morning News]
I groped in such a way in case of dear [Bild, via Babelfish]

FBI agents in Texas have seized recordings of threatening jailhouse phone calls made by Crista Ann Taylor, the ex-girlfriend of Dallas Mavericks All-Star forward Dirk Nowitzki, to the player's attorney, two sources with knowledge of the investigation said.
[...]
Taylor's prison phone calls allegedly contained threats as well as demands for money from Nowitzki, whom she has referred to in numerous media interviews as her former fiancé, and many of Taylor's phone calls were made to the offices of Nowitzki's Dallas-based attorney, the sources said.

This woman is a few crayons short of a whole box. Everyone knows you're supposed to wait until after the kid is born and then go after the money. You know, for the good of the kid.

Yes, that's a puppet hand with four rings on it. (Nice catch by the boys at Waiting For Next Year on this one.) This is like the guy who wears a Metallica t-shirt while attending a Metallica concert, only Kobe Bryant and LeBron James are the type of guys who wear a Metallica t-shirt while attending a Metallica concert when they are actually in Metallica.

And great anti-prediction by TMZ. Did you really think LBJ could out-ego the master?

Eat It TMZ: Kobe Rocks His Own T-Shirt [Waiting For Next Year]
LeBron James — Most Valuable Loser [TMZ]

On Friday, the financially struggling Globe reported that three locals with millions in loose change had emerged as potential buyers of Beantown's newspaper of record, which The New York Times is actively trying to sell. (Newspapers, if you haven't heard, aren't doing so well.)

Behind Door No. 1: Stephen Pagliuca, managing partner of the Celtics.

Pagliuca's day job as the managing director of Bain Capital gives him the kind of cash to pay for Kevin Garnett and potentially dole out the loot necessary to purchase a far-less-intriguing commodity. No one really knows what the Globe is worth — estimates range from $1 to much, much more — but if Pagliuca scores the newspaper, you would think he would have to immediately address the obvious conflict of interest in his owning the Globe's sports section, once the best in the country and still a veritable powerhouse, while presiding over one of the local teams.

All it would take is a statement resembling NESN's list of 10 values, of which "Integrity" is No. 7 — behind "Adaptability" and "Teamwork" — and concisely defined as: "We are committed to the highest level of ethics and professional standards." Somewhere, Dennis Eckersley nods in approval.

If Pagliuca does add the Globe to his list of holdings, the only Boston team left out of this ethical quandary would be the Patriots. Bill Belichick declined to comment.

3 men with local roots emerge as potential Globe buyers [The Boston Globe]
What Price For The Boston Globe? [The New York Times]
The Last, Best Sports Staff [Deadspin]

First of all, here's Rose's apology:

This photo of me was taken at a party I attended in Memphis while I was in school there, and was meant as a joke . . . a bad one, I now admit. I want to emphatically state, now and forever, that Derrick Rose is anti-gang, anti-drug, and anti-violence. I am not, nor have I ever been, affiliated with any gang and I can't speak loudly enough against gang violence, and the things that gangs represent.

In posing for this picture, I am guilty of being young, naive and of using extremely poor judgment. I sincerely apologize to all my fans for my mistake. I pride myself on being a good citizen, and role model, that young people can look up to and I want to urge all my young fans to stay away from gangs and gang-related activities.

Did anyone out there actually think Derrick Rose was or is in a gang? Or that he's some sort of Gangster Disciples emissary because he once threw their sign in front of a camera and because he's from ... the South Side? That he's endorsing a lifestyle? With a white player, it should go without saying, this would all be chalked up to nothing more sinister than youthful indiscretion. With Rose, however, some jittery people seemed to think there was cause for concern:

DaBullz.com:

There's not really a lot to comment on this picture, other than it looks like there is a lot of smoke in that room, and to say that I hope that Rose isn't down with the gang lifestyle.

Hardwood Paroxysm:

It's common knowledge that there's a very big gang structure in Chicago, particularly on the South Side where Rose grew up. ... Chicago and it's surrounding areas are a hotbed of gang activity. It's a huge, huge city, so that sort of thing happens. But it's also a circumstance of his upbringing that Rose would be associated at all with this sort of thing. It's scary and dangerous that Rose could at all be indebted to Chicago gangs, if it's true. But it's also a fact of his life that he really didn't have much choice.

It's also common knowledge that the South Side is home to a large black middle class and in many ways wouldn't be all that alien to anyone who grew up in, say, suburban Maryland, so let's please stop talking about the area as some lawless, monolithic Dodge City of the Midway. Gangs, however, have always had a special purchase on Americans' fears, and people prone to exoticizing them seem to suddenly forget they're woven into the fabric of certain neighborhoods — like the Englewood neighborhood where Rose was raised. That they are is an unfortunate state of affairs. But that Rose might show some familiarity with the culture of the place where he lived for nearly two decades shouldn't be shocking or scary.

Chicago Bulls' Derrick Rose responds to photo controversy [Chicago Tribune]

Christopher James Carolan—who was already wanted on an unrelated burglary charge—worked for Price Security Company, and was assigned to provide security services to Parker's home. He abruptly resigned last month and then the very next day—lo and behold—he listed an autographed Michael Jordan jersey on Craigslist. A jersey much like the one that used to belong to Parker! How about that!

Are you ready for the dumbest part of the story?

The jersey was listed on Craigslist for $500 or best offer, but sheriff's investigators said the jersey has a value of $20,000.

I'm starting to suspect that this guy didn't really know what he was doing.

Tony Parker's Stolen Jersey Recovered [KSAT]
Guard accused of stealing from Tony Parker [San Antonio Express-News]

Nash was on with David Letterman last night, filing a comedy field report from the NBA Finals and guess what? He wasn't terrible! He's got a sense of humor of about himself, he pronounces words correctly, thinks pretty quickly on his feet, and didn't drop the microphone. He's already more qualified that 90% of ESPN or TNT's studio analysts.

He has got to do something about that hair though. I thought he only looked like that after four quarters of playing basketball. Yeesh.

Late Show with David Letterman [CBS]

Donaghy is serving a 15-month sentence in Pensacola, Florida, for gambling on NBA games while serving as an NBA referee, which I guess is frowned upon. He will be released to a halfway house in Tampa, but it's not clear if the release is tied to an alleged incident in November of last year, when a mobster went to town on him.

The only evidence of the assault is this press release from a "prisoner advocacy group" that went to the media yesterday.

Donaghy's release date has recently been in question due to concerns about his medical condition. Donaghy was injured during an assault in November of 2008. During the assault, another inmate claiming ties to the New York mob beat Donaghy with a heavy object. Donaghy suffered severe knee and leg injuries that will require surgery.

Oh, man. I know that NBA fans consider the guy a despicable low-life, but that sucks. It's like when you're watching Shawshank Redemption, doesn't some small part of you feel a tiny bit of pity for Bogs after Captain Hadley puts him in a wheelchair for the rest of his life? I mean, sure, the guy was a sadistic, psychopathic rapist, but that just ain't right. (Is it just me? Crickets?)

Anyway, moral of the story? Prison is the worst.

Former NBA Referee Tim Donaghy to be Released From Prison on June 17, 2009 [P. Zaranek Executive Prison Consultants]
Former ref Donaghy seeks to rebuild his life when released from prison [LA Daily News]

UPDATE: We just got an email from Pat Zaranek, of Executive Prison Consultants, with a little more detail on the "incident":

Here is what we know at this time regarding the incident in prison:

Tim Donaghy was attacked by another inmate claiming he had ties to the NY mob. Donaghy was threatened that he would be shot in the head and his knee caps would be broken. Donaghy suffered knee injuries that were confirmed via x-ray and an MRI taken 3-4 months after the attack. The attacker was removed from the facility and locked down in a higher level facility. The prison officials did not refer the attack to investigative authorities - they chose to handle it internally. Donaghy was placed on "protective status" which is known as Central Inmate Monitoring. This is done for inmates who face possible safety concerns.

The book he is writing is a "tell all" about his 13 years in the NBA and how he successfully picked winners of NBA games 70-80% of the time. It is about his knowledge of special relationships between referees and players and coaches, as well as the NBA's manipulation of games and playoff series. There will be more on the book at a later date.

Donaghy reportedly received a lesser sentence due to his "substantial" cooperation with authorities, but it's not clear if that meant selling mob-connected gamblers down the river or if this guy just lost a lot of money on Sacramento. Or it could just be a good old fashioned prison war. Maybe we'll find out in the book!

In case you're still wondering, Executive Prison Consultants "serves an advisory capacity for clients facing federal criminal charges, those who have already been charged, those facing incarceration, and those who are being released. We do not provide legal advice. Rather, our clients contract with us to help them navigate the many challenges they and their family will face when involved in the federal legal process." Look them up if you ever get sent to the hoosegow.

Prolific contrarian Allen Barra had a column in yesterday's paper in which he not only addressed the fact that Stan Van Gundy's looks fall somewhere south of the Greek ideal (maybe you've heard), but suggested that his average appearance was actually drawing in fans.

Stocky — the uncharitable might say portly — and with a mustache that appears to be borrowed from Dr. Phil, Mr. Van Gundy is pretty much indifferent to fashion and can often be seen courtside in a simple dark jacket and pullover knit shirt. His confrontational style owes more to perspiration than inspiration; his uncoiffed hair is tousled by the end of the game, as it was during Sunday night's thrilling overtime loss to the Lakers in the NBA finals.

[...]

But despite the absence of marquee superstars on the Magic, the ratings for the first two games of the finals have been surprisingly good, and early indications are that fans are finding a working-class hero in Orlando's coach.

OK, well, that's just ridiculous, not least because Barra seems to think so-so looks and an indifference to style are exclusively the domains of the working class. Most people identify with ugly (but fabulously wealthy) pro coaches just as much as they do with good-looking (but fabulously wealthy) pro coaches, which is to say, not at all.

But then Barra goes and talks to Pat Riley and things get really stupid. Maybe Riles feels guilty over stealing Van Gundy's first championship and wants to say nice things. Or maybe he, like every coach ever, thinks the job matters far more than it really does:

Mr. Riley, for whom Mr. Van Gundy served as a longtime assistant coach at Miami, calls him "the most important acquisition Orlando ever made. More than any single player, he's the one who turned the franchise around."

This story is as old as Clair Bee, and it isn't any truer now than it was back in those days. Coaches just aren't that important — James Naismith said as much. Far more important is having a very tall, very athletic man who can score 21 points on six shots. Enough about the guy in the bad suit.

UPDATE: Mr. Barra responds:

This is Allen Barra replying to Tommy Craggs. My piece in the Wall Street Journal was not, as you imply, a round table discussion on the brilliance of the coach. I did not, as you suggest, imply that Stan Van Gundy's "average appearance was actually drawing in fans." I did not suggest that "so-so looks and an indifference to style are exclusively the domains of the working class." These are things you seem to want to have a confrontation about with someone and chose to distort what I wrote in order to have that confrontation. I did not say these things, and I did not imply them.

I did describe Stan Van Gundy's appearance — accurately, I think — and quoted his brother, Jeff, to the effect that no one would confuse either of them with Brad Pitt. If you disagree with this, I'm afraid you'll have to take up the matter with Angelina Jolie.

My assessment of Stan Van Gundy as a working class hero was based at least in part on his own statement that he'd like to find a small school and "settle there."

I did suggest that people were tuning in after a lopsided Lakers win because they were identifying with Van Gundy's animated style. If I'm wrong, you will please tell me which charismatic superstars on the Orlando Magic people were tuning in to watch.

Finally, if Pat Riley's assessment of Van Gundy — that he turned the Orlando franchise around — is "really stupid" and that "coaches just aren't that important," please take time to present a reasoned argument instead of using the typical internet loud-mouth mode of yelling that something is so because you say it is so.

The Magic's Coach Just Looks Ordinary [WSJ]

At the very least, this one is sure to get a little more traction than U.S. Rep. Steve Cohen's "vestige of slavery" line of attack. Writes Pechman:

Surprisingly lost in the discussion about whether age limits are appropriate for the NBA draft is the fact that many state laws prohibit employment discrimination against individuals who are eighteen or over. As playing in the NBA is employment - albeit a dream job - eighteen year olds are deprived of their potential employment and are thus victims of age discrimination. In New York, for example, the New York State Human Rights Law prohibits employers from refusing to hire or employ an "individual eighteen years of age or older… because of such individual's age." The NBA, and its players' union, are subject to compliance with all New York employment laws, as well as other state laws which prohibit discrimination based on age.

So the lawyers hate the rule. The economists hate the rule. A Tennessee congressman hates the rule. Bob Knight hates the rule. Greg Oden hates the rule. Hell, even Dick Vitale, who never offers an opinion that can't be expressed via catchphrase, hates the rule. Yes, that's right: The rule is so bad even Dick Vitale makes sense.

And David Stern's response? He wants to raise the age minimum to 20. This is what the modern NBA has become: a league where the suits are the ones constantly breaking the law. Awesome, baby.

The NBA Age Limit and the Employment Discrimination Laws [BWP Employment Law]

After all, who wouldn't want a tramp stamp in the front, where it's more conducive for touching? Certainly not Miller and, apparently, not this female companion of his, either.

Either way, it beats spending the summer recess with a jet ski and a pig.

Reggie Miller Struggles In the TNT Chair, But Out Of It... [The Big Lead]
Reggie Miller's Tat: Does It Come In Men's? [TMZ]

PHOTO: Flynet