Deadspin
David Hirshey writes regularly about soccer for Deadspin.
"You fancy one, mate?" It was noon on Sunday, and I was on the tube to Arsenal station (how cool to root for a team with its own subway stop!) when the fetid breath of the bloke in the hooded Arsenal sweatshirt next to me wafted up into my face.
"One what?" I replied, not sure exactly what I was being offered. A knuckle sandwich? A hummer? A ticket to Jade Goody's address on racism before the House of Lords?
That's when he reached into his backpack and took out a ... six pack of Stella.
Did I miss something, or can you brazenly drink beer on subways all around the world except in our benighted little country? Or is it just on big game days?
At any rate, I accepted the gracious gift from my fellow Gooner and we clinked cans. "Here's to Arsenal," I toasted. "Fookin' ManU," my new friend added. "What a bunch of shite."
It was at that moment, as I brought the Stella to my lips and wallowed in the shared vitriol toward our most bitter rival — note I didn't say "hated", a designation I reserve for Mourinho's overpriced tarts — that I asked myself the question: Could life get any better?
You bet your Gooner ass it could. To be in Emirates Stadium when Henry headed the winner in the final minute of stoppage time was to witness an explosion of joy that even Dirk Diggler would have envied. The second the ball billowed the net, I was bearhugged by a large bald man, high-fived by a 13-year-old boy and kissed by a halfway decent-looking blonde whom I saved from certain death when, in her crazed exultation, she nearly did a triple gainer off the upper deck. Then came the ear-splitting chant that echoed around the stadium.
"Who are ya? Who are ya?," the fans taunted as United, which seven minutes earlier had the title by the balls, trudged off the pitch still atop the Prem but now looking warily over their shoulder at the three teams — Chelsea, Liverpool and You Know Who — perched below them. Yes, it's no fun anytime you do Chelsea a favor, but considering all the pain that has been inflicted on Mourinho lately, I didn't feel too bad that ManU's defeat kept them in the hunt. See, like the beer-proffering guy on the subway I believe that it's the small, unexpected gestures of generosity that make the world a better place.
(more after the jump)
Besides, who cares about the Special One's problems when I could take such fiendish delight in Sir Alex's discomfort. All that faux bonhomie Fergie spouted before the game about the deep respect he has for Wenger and Arsenal disappeared at the final whistle; he never broke stride or made eye contact when shaking the Frenchman's hand.
Even though the main antagonists who stoked the blood feud between these two football giants in recent years — Keane, Vieira, Van Nistelrooy — have moved on, make no mistake, this was no love-in at Emirates. The only differences between yesterday's match and the famous bustup in the tunnel at Old Trafford were: a) Arsenal won and b) Fergie ended up with egg, not pizza, on his puce-colored face.
Enmity aside, no two teams in the Premiership play more free-flowing, stylish, connect-the-dots soccer than ManU and Arsenal, and yet it took Rooney's goal — his first in eight matches — in the 53rd minute to bring the game to life. Up to that point, Arsenal was strangely subdued, with Henry alternately shrugging and whinging his way around the pitch. As if to remind him of his influence on the Gunners, the PA announcer welcomed the team back after halftime by bellowing, "Here come Thierry Henry's Arsenal!"
Monsieur Va Va Va Voom plays at his own regal pace, but after Rooney scored you sensed the old urgency returning. His clever dummy-jumping out of the way of Rosicky's killer cross-allowed Van Persie to sneak in at the far post and smash home the equalizer in the 83rd minute. Had the game ended then, I would happily have accepted the point and lifted several pints in honor of our gutty comeback. How sweet, though, that it didn't, and that Henry, unlike me, had a glorious last leap of faith in him.
That was one I most definitely fancied, mate.
Comments
Don't worry Reds, at least Ricky Hatton's big payday is coming.
Arsenal has a great team crest. Even though I have been watching Fox Soccer Channel, that's about all I can add.
Apparently I was watching the wrong football game.
We drank on the Tube all summer in London. We also just walked the streets with open containers. It's pretty sweet.
HBO is getting on my last nerve with the way they've been not promoting Ricky Hatton. Showtime did a much better job of hyping him up, and showing the fights from MEN was brilliant on their part.
Sigh, Deadspin needs more boxing talk.
I'd like to remind Mr. Hirshey that his Gooners are still looking at the taints of the other three in the standings.
Gotta admit, Arsenal is my fave...love the fans and the atmosphere live at the games. Thanks Dave for the updates...
ps Am I the only member of the Vaginarchy that watches the EPL?
Amen to that, Ron.
TFA: Not for long.
Yawn, although the Gooner love is warranted this time around, after a big win over the fucking Mancs.
Still, I guess Liverpool will be Hirshey's eternal black spot, except when he can hyperbole up an Arsenal goal at Anfield.
Glad you had a good trip though, especially thanks to our blatant public drinking laws.
Photo of the blonde, please...
TFA: Not for long.
No kidding. They are probably too far behind at this point, but I'd say the Gunners are playing better than anybody at this point.
Ooops... Didn't know about the Van Persie injury.
I don't want to retract, so much as hedge.
I can't believe Hirshey is JUST finding out about drinking on trains/tube en route to a footy match. That's like saying, "Oh look people park cars and sit on their tailgates before football games."
So, maybe the Premiership is out of reach, but an FA cup title and perhaps another trip to the Champion's League final would make this season a success. Too bad Van Persie broke his foot. Although as was said over the weekend this will give Adebayor, Baptista and even Walcott a chance to shine.
Pink Floyd's favorite team is Aresnal, therefore, my favorite team is Arsenal. That's about all I can add to this conversation.
The Van Persie injury is gonna be rough...I'll be watching the replay at noon, cant wait.
I'll third the need for more boxing talk around here as well.
For those wanting boxing talk, I'm going to have to assume that you already make your daily visit to No Mas:
http://www.nomas-nyc.com/scorecard.html
Also, that was a great fucking match. Probably better than Chelsea-Arse, although it didn't have anything on the same level as Essien's rocket.
Ricky Hatton is a City supporter, thank fuck.
Maybe Psycho should send him round our practice ground to scare the shit out of some of the boys after that abortion vs Rovers on Saturday.
I walked by the Emirates just before the match, and the t-shirt guy was playing a song (to the tune of 'Doncha' by the Pussycat Dolls)
#Chelsea, doncha wish you had Thierry Henry?"
llpvol: nope. I'm also a member of the vaginarchy (wow, what a charming term).
Anyway. I hate to be happy for an Arsenal win after those two Cup games, but screw it. Good job, Gunners.
That was the greatest EPL game I have seen all season. I am EXTREMELY jealous of Mr. Hirshey for having been there. Thierry (whom, by the way Mr. Hirshey, the French prefer to call Titi) had a brilliant header to seal the 3 points after the announcers spent most of the match discussing how his lack of scoring off headers was the biggest criticism of his game.
2nd base: is that Randall "Pink" Floyd or THE Pink Floyd?
I'd be more smug about Liverpool remaining ahead of the sainted Gooners if it weren't for the fact that the Reds still have to play Arsenal again at the end of March, and the fact that Arsenal has been utterly dominant in the three matches so far this year.
Oh by the way, which one is Pink?
Although van Persie has been absolutely ON FIRE lately, I think that Walcott will be able to fill in ably (not to the same extent) certainly. And with Baptista, Adebayor and Henry (and Flamini beginning to make things happen) I don't think that second place is out of the question.
Sorry DH, but speaking as a recovering gooner, I'm trying to keep you from hitting rock bottom with this from The Guardian's Fiver:
"When will Henry be hailed as the best player in the world?" enquired one of the in-no-way excitable occupants of a certain satellite channel's studio as Arsenal celebrated their win. "Imagine how much sunshine they'd be blowing up his hole if anyone had been marking him?" enquired one of the cynics sprawled across the sofa in front of the Fiver Towers plasma screen.
And while the first step to moving back into sanity - and perhaps south of the river - is admitting you have a problem. The second step is the far more important one in this arena; acknowledging the pain you have inflicted on those you harmed through careless boosterism and Darren Prince-esque hyperbole. Put the Emirates "unaccompanied minor" colouring book away, re-read this piece of revisionist reportage, look at the Premiership standings and all will be forgiven.
Henry's post-goal celebration was all kinds of fun. He does that thing where he always does, coolly running up the sideline, then says "Fuck it, I'm going to enjoy this", takes a sharp turn and starts dancing with the crowd, and then does a goofy dance with Adabayor.
And now I don't feel so bad about Liverpool beating Chelsea, which sorta helped United. Still, Hirshey, Hornby, bin Laden and all you other Gooners can still suck a dick.
Vizzini - I'd worried about the return fixture against Arsenal as well, but two things to keep in mind:
a) the match is at Anfield
b) Dudek won't be in goal
So maybe Reina can hold them to 2 goals this time?
Plus it's at Anfield, so Kuyt'll get at least one.
I like how it took about a third of the season for the various EPL announcers to start calling "Cowt" instead of "Kite".
spinachdip:
c) van Persie is out for at least six weeks. Not that the other strikers aren't dangerous, but that's not gonna hurt.
Can someone explain to me how being a fan of one of the three teams that seems to win every year in the EPL (United, Arsenal, Chelsea) is different from being an insufferable fan of the Yankees, Lakers, Cowboys, Red Sox, et al?
For reference:
05-06: Chelsea
04-05: Chelsea
03-04: Arsenal
02-03: Manchester United
01-02: Arsenal
00-01: Manchester United
99-00: Manchester United
98-99: Manchester United
97-98: Arsenal
96-97: Manchester United
95-96: Manchester United
94-95: Blackburn Rovers (!!!!)
93-94: Manchester United
92-93: Manchester United
God Bless beer and youtube:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aI4eFfRfRWk
BigTenObsession: Would you say the French are obsessed with Titi?
No Mas is blocked at work, sadly. "Personal Websites"
Spinachdip: I would have agreed with you on the Anfield advantage until a few weeks ago. I'll go with you on point b though ... my nine year old daughter would have been more effective than Dudek.
Would you say the French are obsessed with Titi?
Yes, Tuffy, yes we are.
And KC - I've been a fan of Arsenal since '99 when they first picked up Thierry Henry, who I had been following since his debut with Monaco. So, although I have seen my fair share of wonderous seasons (including the undefeated season), my love for the team really developed due to Wenger's importing of his fellow Frenchmen (and Thierry in particular). I try not to be insufferable about it, but they do play the game beautifully.
Ron - That's an effing shame, man. They've got a gnarly Frazier first-round brutalizing as "Knockout of the Week" this time around.
Kid Canada - Yeah, note that it's even worse than the various American leagues. Of course, this is because without playoffs, the most consistently good team nearly always wins.
I don't follow the EPL, I wasn't trying to be 100% snarky, it's just that everyone seems to be a fan of one of those three teams (and perhaps Liverpool), and every other team in the EPL seems like the Kansas City Royals.
Vizz - you're unsure about the Anfield advantage? We've won 14, Drawn 2 and Lost 2 at home in all competitions [Premiership, Carling Cup, FA Cup, Champion's League] since August.
Granted, the 2 L's were recently, and both to the same team [fucking gooners], but still, we fielded weakened sides in both contests [aka DUDEK... need I say any more?], so the advantage is still there.
KC: NOW WITH ONLY 90% SNARK!
By the way, you'll also get tired of hearing about Fulham (aka MLS East) pretty soon if they get Oguchi Onyewu (putting them at 4 Americans on the team). Although Gooch IS the balls.
KC: Somehow my sister is a Tottenham fan.
Don't know if a data point of one is enough to convince you of anything, but if you concisously make the decision pull for anyone else besides the teams you mentioned, it's like deciding you want to be a Cubs fan. And that's just stupid.
Kid Canada -- in fairness, a lot of the Liverpool fans around here appear to be natives of the Merseyside area [like myself]... and it's probably a similar case with a lot of fans for the other 3 teams.
As for the US followers of the Premiership, it makes sense. When yr trying to get into following the foreign sport, you form the allegiances quickly when those 4 teams get the lion's share of the TV time, and eventually the support is there.
Before I moved to the US, I discovered the NBA [sad, I know], and the only teams that ever got UK airtime were the teams making the championships or the finals. In the mid-90s, it was a steady diet of the Sonics, the Jazz, the Bulls and the Lakers. I became a Sonics fan, and the allegiance stuck. [Again, sad I know].
It's also a school thing, right? Lot more people doing semesters abroad, or just traveling in general, and London, Manchester are the main destinations.
Am I way off-base on this?
LB: I'm trying to see it that way, but those 2 Ls (and the L at Emerates) were pastings. I would think at this point that Arsenal would be mostly immune to the Anfield effect, and that the Reds could be a little rattled. Reina will be a massive improvement, though.
Liverpool 3, Arsenal 6
LFC: Dudek, Peltier, Hyypia, Paletta, Warnock (Alonso 58), Guthrie, Gerrard, Aurelio, Gonzalez (Luis Garcia 11) (Carragher 75), Fowler, Bellamy.
Liverpool 1, Arsenal 3
LFC: Dudek, Finnan, Carragher, Agger, Riise (Aurelio 60), Pennant, Alonso, Gerrard, Luis Garcia, Kuyt, Crouch.
Arsenal 3, Liverpool 0
LFC: Reina, Finnan, Hyypia (Agger 82), Carragher, Riise, Gerrard, Alonso, Zenden, Gonzalez (Pennant 61), Crouch (Bellamy 71), Kuyt.
Vizz --
Believe me, I'm not taking away from Arsenal's performances in those games, but we did field weird sides. The 3-1 result was close to full-strength, but that 6-3 side is just ridiculous. 3 guys in defence who barely play!
It shows where Rafa's desires lie in terms of what trophies he's focusing on. Ferguson does that shite all the time -- field a team of random squad members in a minor competition, and if they win, they win, but if they lose, no hard feelings, at least no-one's hurt.
However, I do see what you're saying -- I feel like we're still tough at home especially with Reina between the posts. Plus we'll play 'em much harder in the Premiership, I hope.
PR: That's assuming you choose your teams.
I like to think that Charlton chose me, or at least that way I get to play the victim in the abusive relationship.
I became a Sonics fan, and the allegiance stuck. [Again, sad I know].
Yes, yes it is. (this from a Knicks fan - please don't laugh.)
As for your other assertions - beats the hell out of me. My dad was good enough to play in a lower league in France when he was there in high school, and played in college here in the US so I grew up watching matches every Weekend. Back then it was mostly on the Spanish or Italian channels, but when I got a little older I began to follow the motherland (France) as much as I could without being able to see too many matches. I was weaned on Platini, Cantona, Thuram, Lizarazu, Pires, Vieira, Zidane, and eventually Henry (whom I followed beginning with Monaco all the way to Arsenal).
In my defense, I became a Liverpool supporter when I was 9 because I thought the red uniform was pretty. And they were pretty crappy (relatively speaking) during the mid-to-late-90s, so while I may be insufferable, I have suffered myself (again, relatively speaking).
I also support Barnet down in League 2. They won the Conference a couple of years ago, so I guess that makes me a glory hunter.
Listen, if you are an american with no prior history, going to go to the trouble of following a league on the other side of an ocean, why the hell would you root for a team like man city, that, in a good year, might sneak into one of the last UEFA cup places? Yeah the big four tend to dominate the EPL, but there's always the champions league. I've always felt that you can't really choose a team, they sort of choose you. And as LB said, when the top four get the lions share of TV time, they are ones that make an impression.
Also, Chelsea can suck a dick
KC - it doesn't really answer your question vis a vis douchi-ness, but one difference is that winning the title is just one of a number of competitions these teams are fighting for. FA Cup, League Cup, UEFA, Champions League, etc. The FA Cup especially always has some complete underdog making it the finals and shaking things up. It makes for a lot of competition all around.
But yeah, not a lot of variety at the top.
I always enjoy pissing off the British guys at work by steadfastly refusing to support one team and hating every