Deadspin
If you thought Elijah Dukes would sit on his laurels and be happy with a first round SHOTY victory, then you sir, are a Rays fan praying to God he doesn't do anything stupid. Your prayers haven't been answered, but are very important to us and will be answered in the order they were received.
Dukes found himself in the middle of a Dominican league game and was thrown out for — get this! — arguing with the umpire, and chest bumping him a little. It measures just a 6.3 on the Dukes Intensity scale. But maybe it's society's fault. Literally:
It's not uncommon, however, for these games to become heated - and this one was between the league's top teams - with players jawing and fans screaming and throwing bottles onto the field, and umpires are quick to eject players in order to retain control.This stuff's normal, huh?
Elijah Dukes: "Is this heaven?"
Licey: "... It's the Dominican Republic."
Dukes Erupts Yet Again [St. Petersburg Times]
Comments
Is that Pedro Martinez Jr. holding him back!?
Lou Pinella is not impressed
Why did Dukes go to the D.R? There are plenty of lovely latina teens in Tampa he can impregnate.
Usted es muerto, Dawg.
@mlmintampa: Dude missed a few games this year; you may have heard about it. The Rays sent him for some practice where he couldn't get in any more trouble. Unfortunately, they soon discovered space travel hadn't advanced to that point yet, so they settled for the Dominican League.
Shut up, Dukes. You're just a white suburban punk like the rest of us.
Elijah's intimidation would suit well for a Dominican Rap Video. In your face, Melkys Cabrera.
@Innings Eater: Usted esta muerto, Dawg.
Fixed.
/SPN 2200 does teach you things
"with players jawing and fans screaming and throwing bottles onto the field"
I'll think about this when the Royals are playing the Orioles before a half-empty stadium on a Saturday afternoon in July and both teams are 15 games out of first. Man, those Latins know how to turn everything into a party.
He will be ours. Oh, yes. He will be ours.
Here's to hoping his broken Spanish is as good as his broken English, dawg.
Dukes better stay in the DR and away from Haiti, or else he gonna be the un-dead, dawg.
I fucking got no Dukes
@Slothrop: +1
@RockYouLikeAnIracane: "How you feel and where you are, always use the verb estar"
That's what we were always taught. I supposed muerto is a way of feeling in this case.
I wonder if he will visit any orphans?
@Sarge: +3 pints of Jimmy Beam.
You're a regular fucking Staubach.
@Tuffy: Joking buddy. Actually I would have sent him to Venezuela for winter ball. His level of crazy would be normal there.
Is this the same league Brendan Fraiser played in in The Scout?
@Innings Eater:
I think I just shat myself laughing.
If you think those games are intense, you should watch a game in Knuckle Beach sometime. They wouldn't even be allowed to wear those blue jerseys there.
Can the latina's cross borders in search of child support? If not look out ladies.
@Nationalcoholic: That outfield of Wily Mo - Dukes - Lastings Milledge will be something; the Nationals will have cornered the MLB's freedarko quota.
@ CHIEF WAHOO: You say our names, we're going to have to kill all these people, Archie.
Start a discussion:
Login with your username and password below. Or comment on this post via email.
Forgot your username or password? New User?