This will teach you all a lesson. Do not doubt me and the countless hours I spent analyzing this.

Our long, national wet dream is over.

If anyone knows about ass it's BFT.

BFT--"from the pics I know who it is"--the pics of her butt? How well do you know the Thong Girls? Anyway, tell Megan her goods made me cry, in a good way.

Now that's investigative journalism.

I just want the world to know I had a youtube link to the song girl's ass up on the Darrent Williams post on January 1st, moments after it happened. And I'm very proud of that.

Thank You Wahoo Mcdaniel. From the bottom of my loins.

I stand by my point, nothing says Darrent Williams is dead how do we move on like Megan's prime ace!

TJH

Wahoo, I never thanked you for rescuing that comment thread from threats (including my own)of near serious discussion and debate.

Your contribution was invaluable, although 289 almost made us forget with his 'Ville link from last night.

Also I know know them all, and from the pics I know who it is...

Isn't he the one who originally said it was Allison?

so there's a hierarchy of songgirlness??

you're not allowed in certain areas if you're new/old/etc?

from the looks of that wizofodds video, i thought they just jumped around and shook their asses wherever they were at the moment...didn't know there was any more too it....

One Word To Describe Me: Fun!

Any chance we come up with some better ones??

At the end of the day, does it really matter who's ass it was?

What really matters here is we were treated to a sight only Matt Leinart, smarmy overbearing USC frat punks, and her gay wax-ologist had seen. And that's a very, VERY good thing.

It gave my happy sock a Merry New Year's Night.

Our long, national wet dream is over.

I was gonna go with "boner" over "wet dream," but that works.

Type "ass" in Google image search.

There, you didn't even need this. You're welcome.

finally, a name to put in my mental rolodex.

Back from a three-week Deadspin leave of absence for a holiday bender/vacation and then a few days of sobriety and catching up at the office. Nothing could be a more rewarding welcome back than the thought, effort, analyis and spirit that went into solving this mystery.

I thank you.

It's not Megan. It's Megan Exclamation Point!

Next, gentlemen, we tackle the whereabouts of Amelia Earhart. 289, I fully expect a Google screencap of her plane's wreckage by tomorrw AM.

Whew. What a relief.

I now know that the completely anonymous 20 year old that I'll probably never see again in my lifetime anyway has a different name than I thought she did 12 hours ago.

Unless she shows up at my office, resume in hand, in a couple of years looking for work, I'm thinking my interest in the whole thing is over with.

Word is Amelia had a flat, slat ass...thus...she''ll remain missing...

It seems like USC song girls are having a great year....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Brcl8U0jHto

BCP - You screen for people in your office cheering at the wrong time or not wearing underwear?

Glad I didn't go work for you...

She did have a sexy back though:
http://maproomsystems.org/images/blogimages/blog1/000milli...

I love this country.

3. This type of action should not be tolerated..she is repersenting the school and she should be expelled.

Posted at 2:04PM on Jan 2nd 2007 by Linda

http://www.aolsportsblog.com/2007/01/02/usc-song-girl-goes...

hahaha Amelia was bringing SexyBack decades before JT. Scooped by female aviators, suck it Boy Bander!

while we were busy trying to name that ass, this happened:

Happy New Year, Sweet Barbaro! I had a dream about you New Year's night. You were running in a pasture with your friends and having a grand ole time! You're beautiful, and we love you! Love always, Gail & the furry 13 & feathered 1
Gail Fuller, 57; Maryville, TN, USA
posted on 2007-01-03 12:24:28

the good news is, at the rate the internet is going, every single one of you losers will have a chance to be humiliated online someday. I'm sure you'll enjoy it almost as much as you've enjoyed all of this assery.

oh whittlz, do email discussions count? because i have a good one for you.

Next week on Unsolved Deadspin Mysteries:

Suss attempts to discover the name of the cute little brunette waitress down at Ruby Tuesday, and if she's single, and if she is up for a lifetime of disappointment.

Suss-- ask her if she likes Kung Fu movies.

Meredith, As if, and she works at Ruby Tuesday's so yes.

Suss-- how much flair does she have?

I still say she is Allison.

I can finally get some rest.
Good night, Deadspinners.

oh whittlz, do email discussions count? because i have a good one for you.

it's not my fault you can't read English good.

Gail, that's amazing - on New Year's Eve, I had a drunken dream about a USC song girl's ass!

Too bad we know my dream is the only one that will ever come true.

Pencil in Megan as a 15-seed for the 2007 SHOTY, and see if she can work her way up the bracket.

it's not my fault you can't read English good.

it's not my fault you left a very open ended statement that could be read that way.

Get out of my brain, Sam!

it's not my fault you left a very open ended statement that could be read that way.

hey, where's my t-shirt?

more importantly....did anyone figure out whom the Louvisville cheerleader from last night is?

link provided for quick reference:

http://chadrules.com/documents/louisville.html

did i take your shirt off?

Becca Manns supposedly.

Suss attempts to discover the name of the cute little brunette waitress down at Ruby Tuesday, and if she's single, and if she is up for a lifetime of disappointment.

You know, "My Horny Applebee's Lunch" was one of the best things I ever read on Craigslist.

This might sound made up, but I promise from the bottom of my frickin heart its the truth.
Last year I attended classes at USC. I dropped out, long story, money talks$$$
But anyway I didn't have a class with Megan, but she was in the same buliding as me. I socialized a couple of times, and to tell you the truth she drinks like a fish, is loud, spoiled, annoying, and truly is a bitch. No I didn't hit it, I don't spit much game (In all honesty as much as I try to deny it my girlfriend is quite ugly) I was kinda hammered, but i can vagley remember her talking about her dreams to getting into acting. This kind of ass coverage could jump statrt her career in porn. Can't wait...

Sorry soozy, but channel 39, totally.

44, I almost pissed my pants on that Applebee's post. How had I never seen that before? Phenomenal.

It's too bad Fox didn't cover this tonite instead of the football "game"

Happy New Year, Sweet Barbaro! I had a dream about you New Year's night. You were running in a pasture with your friends and having a grand ole time! You're beautiful, and we love you! Love always, Gail & the furry 13 & feathered 1
Gail Fuller, 57; Maryville, TN, USA
posted on 2007-01-03 12:24:28

Wow. Just wow.

http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b243/michiganboy2412/USC...

Sadly, definitely appears to be butt-floss, and not a bareback. Still, enticing.

Lace trim, bikini-cut, off-white silk. Victoria's Secret most likely. Light skidmark stains visible if held under the right light.

It really does look better in HD.

Thanks for the link JerseyCubbies...I clicked on it and was scrolling down when my boss walks in. He shrugged and said "nice snapper." He's so chic.

Manny: Thanks for the update. Got any news on the Hindenburg?

TheStarterWife: You missed the point, sadly.