NEW YORK, 4:57 AM, MON MAY 12 | 15 POSTS IN THE LAST 24 HOURS | tips@deadspin.com | SUBMIT A TIP | RSS
Posts Tagged “

Arsenal

”
david hirshey is the closer

Man U Rubs It In

David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer.

Go ahead, bow down. Heel before Manchester United like you would a certain overdressed German guy with a pointy hat who's playing to a sold out Yankee Stadium this week. They deserve it. They stand on the cusp of pulling off an astonishing double championship, and they have done it with style and panache. So why am I not ready to genuflect?

More »

3:00 PM on Mon Apr 14 2008
By Hirshey
4,388 views, 31 comments

david hirshey is the closer

The Real Reason Arsenal Crapped Out


David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer.

I blame myself. I fucked with my own mojo this week, and, in doing so, cursed Arsenal.

More »

1:35 PM on Wed Apr 9 2008
By Leitch
5,868 views, 85 comments

Latest by Arsenalgirl: "- the second goal resulting from an Maradona-esque 80-yard run by Walcott through four Liverpool defenders in the 83rd minute that had me high-fiving and hugging everyone in the pub -" Theo Walcott so far always seems to have his thunder more »

david hirshey is the closer

Arsenal Gets Its Bear Stearns On

David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer.

What can I say? I drank the Haterade, going so far as to denounce a certain Israeli manager I call Average Grant as a disgrace to his religion for choosing Easter to rise from the dead. All I can say is: Would Sandy Koufax have played on such a holy day? Then I quaffed the bitter, screaming at a certain defender I call Cuntley Cole every time he touched the ball. "Even Eliot Spitzer didn't throw up on his whore, you whiny little bitch," I raged. I even made the ultimate sacrifice. I declined a free beer after Arsenal went up 1-0 so as not to jinx it.

More »

3:00 PM on Mon Mar 24 2008
By Hirshey
3,675 views, 55 comments

could jesus stop didier?

Drogba Blows Kisses, Hirshey Blows

Didier Drogba and Chelsea just finished off Arsenal at the Bridge 2-1, moving the home team in to second on the table. Drogba scored two goals in the second half to bring the Blues back from a one goal deficit. Chelsea now stands just five points shy of Manchester, and speaking of them... More »

2:51 PM on Sun Mar 23 2008
By Unsilent Majority
2,521 views, 15 comments

david hirshey is the closer

Arsenal's Limpness, And Rationalization

David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer.

Well, that settles it then. Arsenal' s wonder season is over, lost in the Oceanic 815 wreckage of its two colossal Cup defeats , first to Tottenham and now to Manchester United. There is nothing to live for and the only thing left to do is to off oneself, like, say, Owen Wilson. This way, if you survive, there's always that chance Sir Alex will invite you to United's victory orgy at Ronaldo's place

More »

1:05 PM on Mon Feb 18 2008
By Leitch
4,176 views, 48 comments

david hirshey is the closer

Mourning An Arsenal Defeat

David Hirshey writes regularly about soccer for Deadspin.

While the rest of the world was mourning Heath Ledger, the people in my shallow universe (almost all six of them) were offering their condolences for that other great loss yesterday. I speak, of course, of the 5-1 drubbing Arsenal's U-11 team took at the feet of their perennial butt boys, Spurs. Friends from all over the world (in other words London and Israel) wrote to commiserate about Arsenal being knocked out of the Carling Cup. How important is the Carling Cup, you ask? Let's get real for a second. It's not exactly the Nextel Cup or even the Stanley Cup. As far as I'm concerned, it's right above the Sippy Cup, which is probably why Arsene Wenger fielded his Diaper Dandys with a few senior players to babysit them.

More »

4:30 PM on Wed Jan 23 2008
By Hirshey
3,192 views, 58 comments

premier league

Never Bring A Lion To A Cannonfight

For some reason, great teams always play with more fervor after a loss. We can all assume the New England Patriots will win the Super Bowl if they fall in Week 17, or that Duke basketball will win the Final Four if they trip up in the ACC tournament. But this isn't the case over in England. Instead, the teams over there play with fervour, which is not actually a brand of alcohol, but actually holds the same definition as "fervor." And this is where Arsenal comes in. More »

8:45 AM on Sat Dec 1 2007
By sussman
3,215 views, 56 comments

Latest by spinachdip: @Somewhere Hidden Within The Dark Recesses Of The Mind: I bet Google does. /asshole (Actually, I'm watching it later on DVR, so I'd prefer not to read the score) more »

getting weekend soccer quotas outta the way

So There's This Big Soccer Game Today, I'm Told

Okay. Take a look to the east. See the sun rising? Okay, look at the little blotch of land right below it. Don't see it? Here, use my binoculars. Hmm... you still don't see it? Okay, well look at this Mercator projection map. Right there. England. Located somewhere in that country, probably in that city where all the roads are, there's a soccer game about to go down between unbeaten Arsenal and just-that-one-time beaten Manchester United. One versus two. More »

8:15 AM on Sat Nov 3 2007
By sussman
2,917 views, 97 comments

Latest by Spectator: Could someone explain to me why the Sp*rs fans at Floyd in Brooklyn could feel justified mocking us Arsenal fans for earning a draw? It almost, ALMOST made me want to finally go all the way uptown to hang more »

soccer

An Unspectacular Arsenal

Bad news for Arsenal fans ... in fact, bad news for all Premiership fans. Thierry Henry is taking his nifty feet and moving to Barcelona. With the move, Arsenal now seems like just another team while Barcelona inspires thoughts of, "Holy Christ, look at that line-up." More »

2:02 PM on Sat Jun 23 2007
By mjdeadspin
1,222 views, 27 comments

soccer

Nothing Says "Comfort Hug" Than A Room Full Of Whores

You know, sometimes we wonder if Deadspin were British (or Czech) and the major sport was — ha! — soccer, we might have even more fun around here. More »

12:00 PM on Thu Mar 29 2007
By Leitch
3,759 views, 106 comments

soccer

Hirshey: Going Crazy Over Arsenal (In A Bad Way)

David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer. More »
soccer

Today In The Premiership...

• Liverpool 0-1 Manchester United. They were playing with then men. Liverpool was controlling most of the play. Things were looking up for Chelsea, who desperately needed Manchester United to stumble... but two minutes into injury time, Cristiano Ronaldo set up for a free kick, it deflected off goalie Jose Reina, and John O'Shea knocked it home. It gives United three huge points, putting them (for the moment, anyway) twelve points clear of Chelsea in the race for the league title. Quite a turn of events, and particularly satisfying for Sir Alex Ferguson after he told Jose Mourinho to shut his goddamn mouth (or something) yesterday. More »

1:59 PM on Sat Mar 3 2007
By mjdeadspin
813 views, 13 comments

Latest by Absurd Hero: Drogba is indeed a beast, but it was Cech that stood out for Chelsea. Two brilliant saves in the span of a minute to keep Chelsea alive in the premiership. I think he's even better after the skull more »

soccer

Hirshey: Too Much Drogba

David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer. More »
soccer

Hirshey: On The Scene For A Huge Arsenal Triumph

David Hirshey writes regularly about soccer for Deadspin. More »
premiership

I'm Sorry, Goalie, But You Are Screwed

I missed this during yesterday's Premiership coverage, which necessitates doubling up on the amount of soccer posts this weekend. Many of you, I'm sure, hate this. And I'm sorry. But Portsmouth's Matt Taylor did something yesterday that is not normal, and I don't think we should ignore it. More »

3:15 PM on Sun Dec 10 2006
By mjdeadspin
238 views, 38 comments

soccer

Today In The Premiership...

• Sheffield United 1-2 Manchester United. Wayne Rooney put Manchester United on his back today and earned them a crucial 2-1 victory over Sheffield United. Sheffield led after a goal in the 13th minute, but a couple of clean Rooney strikes gave the Reds the win. I don't think Rooney's performance can compare, however, to the guy who bit off Sheffield United goalkeeper Paddy Kenny's eyebrow in a bar brawl on Monday, as if that guy's not ugly enough. We have to much to learn in America about brawling and supporting our favorite teams. More »

3:05 PM on Sat Nov 18 2006
By mjdeadspin
68 views, 7 comments

Latest by Existenz: Not to nitpick, but the Reds are Liverpool. Man U are the Red Devils. more »

epl

Today In The Premiership...

• Aston Villa 1-1 Tottenham. The day could've been so much worse for Juan Pablo Angel. Instead of missing the net on a penalty kick, three minutes later heading one into his goal, losing the game, and ending up in the trunk of a hooligan's car with his head wrapped in duct tape and his shoes on fire, he just missed the net on a penalty kick, three minutes later headed one into his own goal, and then had his ass saved by a Gareth Barry goal to salvage the tie for Villa, along with their unbeaten record. More »

3:21 PM on Sat Oct 14 2006
By mjdeadspin
108 views, 6 comments

Latest by stan: When Drogba's dive gave Bikey his second yellow card: "Drogba has a reputation in certain cultures." more »

soccer

Today In The Premiership...

• Everton 3-0 Liverpool. Now that is how you embarrass a rival team. The Toffees served up an ass-beating to their neighbors, with Tim Cahill putting Everton on the board in the 23rd minute, and Andrew Johnson finishing Liverpool off with goals in the 35th and the 90th. Everton finds themselves at the top of the table, with 10 points through 4 games. Liverpool has 4 points through the three games. More »

3:29 PM on Sat Sep 9 2006
By mjdeadspin
198 views, 21 comments