Do Arsenal Even Need Jack Wilshere?

We're pretty staunchly against the year-round transfer gossip circus, since even at the best of times—when the transfer windows are actually open—there are about a thousand reasons never to trust what's being bandied about. But these rumblings about Manchester City sniffing around Arsenal's beloved, detested,… » 4/10/15 3:41pm 4/10/15 3:41pm

Arsenal Players Speak Out Against Homophobia, With Sexy Results

As a matter of policy, we don't usually participate in advertising campaigns. We're making an exception here, though, because a) the advertisement above, featuring several Arsenal players, is for an anti-homophobia campaign, which is fine by us and b) we need a pretext to run the following, which is definitely the… » 9/05/14 12:46pm 9/05/14 12:46pm

Arsenal Striker Nicklas Bendtner Rubbed His Dick On A Taxi Tuesday

While Arsenal were in Germany being ousted by FC Bayern in the Champions League on Tuesday, Gunners striker Nicklas Bendtner was getting shithoused in Denmark. He got so smashed, according to reports, that he threatened a cab driver, pulled out his cock, and humped the car. The Telegraph has more: » 3/13/14 2:02pm 3/13/14 2:02pm

Sad Manchester United Lose Following Wonder Goal From Joel Campbell

Manchester United traveled to Greece to play Olympiakos FC in the Champions League, and they caught an ass-whooping. Olympiakos opened scoring in the 38th minute, when an Alejandro Dominguez shot from the top of the box was deflected before tragically trickling past United keeper David de Gea into the back of the net. » 2/25/14 4:52pm 2/25/14 4:52pm

Let's Celebrate The Least Efficient Scorer in The Premier League

The chart above shows the Premier Leaguers with the highest ratios of goals to shots on goal this season among those who've both scored and averaged two tries per league game. It seems like the sort of thing you could write quite a lot about, but then the more you think about it, the less clear it is just how much of… » 11/09/13 9:25am 11/09/13 9:25am

Once Sad Posers, Arsenal Are Playing Like England's Best Team

Arsenal played Napoli yesterday in a vital Champions League match. It was important because they were drawn into the group of death in the most prestigious club tournament in the world, so of course any points they could pick up at home against last year's Italian runners-up would help them advance to the knockout… » 10/02/13 3:38pm 10/02/13 3:38pm