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New York, 1:39 PM
Fri Dec 11
21 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #atheletics more →

    Jesus Christ Football Star
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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Kid Canada Kid Canada
    06/26/09

    In reply to Jesus Christ Football Star
    23. Bo Duke
    24. Luke Duke
    25. Writing letters to CBS to have Daisy Duke wear something more ladylike
     Reply
    Kid Canada was starred Kid Canada was unstarred
    Image of Sonar Jose Sonar Jose
    06/26/09

    In reply to Jesus Christ Football Star
    "Tebow ... demonstrated that a home-schooler could absorb a playbook as well as the Book of Deuteronomy."


    How very homeschooled of them to cling desperately to the one piece of marginal evidence in favor of what they want to believe and not acknowledge the thousands and thousands of counterexamples that don't fit. I'm sure all those kids will be the next Tim Tebow.

     Reply
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    Image of David Hume David Hume
    06/26/09

    @Sonar Jose: +1
     Reply
    David Hume was starred David Hume was unstarred
    Image of sir_pantsalot sir_pantsalot
    06/26/09

    @Sonar Jose: They will be the next Tebow but not by their choice. Tebow chooses not to sleep with any girl of his choice. These guys on the other hand would give their left leg to be able to sleep with any girl.


    Or were you talking about football skills? If so then these kids have no chance.

     Reply
    sir_pantsalot was starred sir_pantsalot was unstarred
    Image of Hatey McLife Hatey McLife
    06/26/09

    In reply to Jesus Christ Football Star
    That is one creepy sign. No wonder Brandon Marshall wants out.
     Reply
    Hatey McLife was starred Hatey McLife was unstarred
    Image of David Hume David Hume
    06/26/09

    In reply to Jesus Christ Football Star
    [Gets on knees, clasps hands]


    Dear lord, I want to give thanks for your sweet blessings of prefabricated comedy pyramids. Whether they are numbered lists that can be repurposed, open ended questions that suggest ribald answers or easily-reconfigurable ironic happenings, they are the light that guides my days.


    I also want to thank you for so many things, like good health, nice parents, a nice truck, and what I'm told is a large penis.

     Reply
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    Image of MarkKelsosMigraine MarkKelsosMigraine
    06/26/09

    @David Hume: Awesome.
     Reply
    MarkKelsosMigraine was starred MarkKelsosMigraine was unstarred
    Image of ChuckKnoblauchThrowingError ChuckKnoblauchThrowingError
    06/26/09

    @David Hume:

    I'm going to print that out and keep it in my wallet.


    When I try to explain to my friends what makes the comments on Deadspin so funny, I never quite capture it. This does perfectly.

     Reply
    ChuckKnoblauchThrowingError was starred ChuckKnoblauchThrowingError was unstarred
    Image of David Hume David Hume
    06/26/09

    @Chuck Knoblauch Throwing Error: Dude, I'm blushing.
     Reply
    David Hume was starred David Hume was unstarred
    Image of MarkKelsosMigraine MarkKelsosMigraine
    06/26/09

    In reply to Jesus Christ Football Star
    In fairness, "Acedemics" is the coach's new line of Christian-themed athletic gear. Kind of like Under Armour if it were as masculine as Joel Osteen.
     Reply
    MarkKelsosMigraine was starred MarkKelsosMigraine was unstarred
    Image of shea_guevara shea_guevara
    06/26/09

    In reply to Jesus Christ Football Star
    Be the HAMMER! Not the NAIL!


    Oh I would, if I could. If I coooould.

     Reply
    shea_guevara was starred shea_guevara was unstarred
    Image of Weed Against Speed Weed Against Speed
    06/26/09

    In reply to Jesus Christ Football Star
    I could be wrong, but weren't the Acedemics one of the Twelve Tribes of Israel?
     Reply
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    Image of Hatey McLife Hatey McLife
    06/26/09

    In reply to Jesus Christ Football Star
    They can only run the ball on offense, none of them are allowed to complete passes until they get married.
     Reply
    Hatey McLife was starred Hatey McLife was unstarred
    Image of Weed Against Speed Weed Against Speed
    06/26/09

    In reply to Jesus Christ Football Star
    Be the HAMMER not the NAIL


    So, they prefer their players not to be power bottoms? I can see that.

     Reply
    Weed Against Speed was starred Weed Against Speed was unstarred
    Image of Jews For Purple Jesus Jews For Purple Jesus
    06/26/09

    In reply to Jesus Christ Football Star
    Be the HAMMER! Not the NAIL! is also the same pep talk that a good Christian Conservative like Mark Sanford has with his penis before a trip to Argentina.
     Reply
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    Image of ArkansasFred ArkansasFred
    06/26/09

    In reply to Jesus Christ Football Star
    1,167,498: Science and Reason
     Reply
    ArkansasFred was starred ArkansasFred was unstarred
    Image of NineSevenOh NineSevenOh
    06/26/09

    In reply to Jesus Christ Football Star
    Not Pictured: "GOD HATES FAGS" sign.
     Reply
    NineSevenOh was starred NineSevenOh was unstarred
    Image of MarkKelsosMigraine MarkKelsosMigraine
    06/26/09

    @NineSevenOh: +1, but it is not a sign, it is a sandwich board they wear outside of a bar where they heard two dudes once kissed.
     Reply
    MarkKelsosMigraine was starred MarkKelsosMigraine was unstarred
    Image of Steve U Steve U
    06/26/09

    In reply to Jesus Christ Football Star
    6. Chasin' That Tail
     Reply
    Steve U was starred Steve U was unstarred
    Image of Steve U Steve U
    06/26/09

    @Steve U: Great double-post, asshole.
     Reply
    Steve U was starred Steve U was unstarred
    Image of Youkilis on First Youkilis on First
    06/26/09

    In reply to Jesus Christ Football Star
    Be the Hammer! Not the Nail!


    I know these people don't like sodomy, but this is a little too graphic for my tastes.

     Reply
    Youkilis on First was starred Youkilis on First was unstarred
    Image of Weed Against Speed Weed Against Speed
    06/26/09

    @Youkilis on First: @Weed Against Speed: Gah! Well played.
     Reply
    Weed Against Speed was starred Weed Against Speed was unstarred
    Image of I Party With Smoot I Party With Smoot
    06/26/09

    In reply to Jesus Christ Football Star
    83. Shower
     Reply
    I Party With Smoot was starred I Party With Smoot was unstarred
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