David Villa Breaking Down Is The Perfect, Saddest End To Spain's Dynasty

I'll admit it: I kind of love Spain. There was a time—weeks ago!—when they were considered the best team in the world, who had multiple, super long periods where they never lost to anyone for any reason and played a brand of soccer that wasn't just the best but was the culmination of all the best thinking about the… » 6/23/14 2:51pm 6/23/14 2:51pm

What Tim Cahill's Wondergoal Sounded Like In Australia

Australia's national broadcaster SBS gave us a treat yesterday: an inset of announcer Craig Foster going nuts on Tim Cahill's outstanding equalizer against Netherlands yesterday. Australia had a lot to cheer for at the moment, but so did Chile and the other countries who scored goals on Wednesday. Here's all of them,… » 6/19/14 12:23pm 6/19/14 12:23pm

Can Spain Redeem Themselves After The Netherlands Thrashing?

Tiki-taka is dead. The Dutch killed it. Of course, every time Spain or Barcelona lose a major match tiki-taka is proclaimed dead, only to rise again. The truth is tiki-taka remains effective—Bayern won their league and Barcelona came within a Diego Godín header of doing the same—so long as you have the right… » 6/18/14 11:30am 6/18/14 11:30am

Australian Cricketer Suspended For Etching A Dick And Balls On Pitch

Australian cricketer Daniel Worrall found himself a little bored during a match last Friday. Suddenly struck by inspiration, he decided to draw the dick and balls you see above onto the pitch, an act of lewdness for which he has now been suspended. Where the hell is your sense of humor, Australian cricket league? » 3/18/14 9:57am 3/18/14 9:57am

7-Year-Old Girl Writes To Scientists Asking Them To Make Her A Dragon

Australia's got its very own pint-sized Khaleesi in 7-year-old Sophie Lester of Queensland, who over Christmas wrote a letter to the national science agency CSIRO asking for a dragon of her own. Both the letter and the agency's response are so cute you're going to feel like passing out. » 1/08/14 6:05pm 1/08/14 6:05pm

Australian Horse Race Interrupted By Sprinklers

As the horses came around for the final stretch of Race 8 at Bathurst Racecourse, a gauntlet of sprinklers screwed everything up. Path To Freedom ended up passing Run Bullet Run and Roman Victory to win the race, and those tickets were honored, but there was good news for losing bettors. All non-winning tickets were… » 11/03/13 11:35am 11/03/13 11:35am

Here Is a 99-Page Guide to One Highly Organized Australian Man's Dick

There once was a ripped, huge-dicked, extremely attentive, highly organized young man from Australia who was frightfully eager to find the woman of his dreams (within a 50 km radius of his home). To that end, he drafted a 99 page guide (to himself, his life, his future wife; his quirks, his tics, his eleven-inch dick;… » 8/01/13 2:10pm 8/01/13 2:10pm