"How's Your Dick?": The Rise And Fall Of An Alleycat Race

"Stupor Bowl is dead," Gene Oberpriller pronounced after the 18th annual alleycat bike race. The fact that you—hopelessly mainstream as you are—are reading this is proof. As any nightclub owner will confirm, underground cachet is a fragile beast. It's only minutes, or entries in this case, between the insiders who… » 2/07/15 9:30am 2/07/15 9:30am

Newspaper Tweets, Deletes Perfectly Good Aaron Rodgers Penis Joke

The St. Paul Pioneer Press has a quick story on Aaron Rodgers's good-luck charm--the beard of a Lambeau communications technician, which the QB gives a playful li'l fondle during games. Above is how the paper sent it out on Twitter this morning; it was quickly deleted, because Americans just don't appreciate a good… » 12/30/14 5:47pm 12/30/14 5:47pm

Goodbye, Dirk Nowitzki's Out-Of-Control Beard

The damn thing lasted almost three months. The Mavericks swore to grow beards, bushy, unwieldy beards, until they got to .500. It wasn't easy, but with last night's win, the Mavs have crawled all the way back to respectability. As soon as the buzzer sounded, Dirk Nowitzki, the mountain manliest of Dallas's mountain… » 4/15/13 8:51am 4/15/13 8:51am

Pittsburgh's Brett Keisel Will Shear His Neptunian Beard For Charity

Brett Keisel of the Steelers will be de-bearded for charity on Thursday, Feb. 24 at the Diesel Club Lounge in Pittsburgh. The $25 tickets will benefit the Children's Hospital at the University of Pittsburgh's Medical Center, and if anyone feels the need to truly commemorate the occasion, there will be… » 2/18/11 3:10pm 2/18/11 3:10pm