Deadspin: ben+wallace

Take Our Mistake, And Make It Yours

Leitch — Fri, 22 Feb 2008 11:40:55 EST

Because we attended school (occasionally) at the University of Illinois, most of our old friends are fans of the Chicago Bulls, and it's difficult to overstate how excited they were when they initially signed Ben Wallace. It felt vindicating, the reward for waiting for the first post-Jordan star. That didn't work out quite the way they had hoped. And now it's over.

Now Wallace is part of the "save LeBron's sanity" experiment in Cleveland, and the Bulls have Larry Hughes and Drew Gooden to show for it. Alas.

This is how it works in the NBA, we suppose. Shaq, Jason Kidd and Ben Wallace is exhausted and exhausting in Miami, New Jersey and Chicago; they're flipped to become saviors in Phoenix, Dallas and Cleveland. If you're not sure how you feel about an aging superstar ... just wait.

NBA Roundup: Much Ado About Headwear

rickchand — Wed, 29 Nov 2006 10:00:31 EST

Notes on Tuesday's games in the National Basketball Association ...

• Band On The Run. On Saturday Ben Wallace was a rebel — even though he was told by the Bulls not to wear his headband, he wore it anyway, and was benched by coach Scott Skiles. (See? Rebellious.) But on Tuesday he toed the party line, playing sans head strip in a 102-85 win over the Knicks, in which he scored eight points and had 12 rebounds. But then, a bit of retribution, as Wallace made the Bulls look bad. On Saturday the team said that Wallace sustained a sprained finger and wrist, On Tuesday, Wallace said the injury was much worse — ligament damage and bone chips. Nice try Chicago, but Ben Wallace is in the No-Spin Zone!

• What Could Possibly Go Wrong?. All is well with the Houston Rockets. Yao Ming had 25 points as the Rockets tripped up the Timberwolves 82-75, Houston winning their fourth str ... on no, McGrady down! Tracy McGrady is down! (Bruised hip, finished with eight points).

• Bucks Finally Fight Back. Michael Redd's 45 points helped Milwaukee end the horror that has been their series with the Lakers ... LA had won ten straight until Tuesday's 109-105 Bucks victory. Redd had two four-point plays, by the way.

• Happy Trails. Danny Granger, from New Mexico, scored 21 points to lead the Pacers over Trail Blazers 105-97. And that's how they roll in the 505!

• Then Why Do They Keep Scheduling Them?. The Clippers shot a league single game worst 30.6 percent from the floor, losing to the Kings 93-80, their 14th consecutive win over LA.

Scott Skiles Insists That Sweat Drip Unimpeded Into Your Eyes

mjdeadspin — Sun, 26 Nov 2006 13:45:00 EST

Chicago Bulls head coach Scott Skiles, taking a page out of David Stern's playbook, bans players from wearing headbands during games. Ben Wallace, Chicago's prize free agent acquisition, likes to wear a headband during games. Last night, the heated and emotional issue came to a head.

Wallace entered the game with a headband on, but Skiles didn't notice the evil effects of it until 2:02 had elapsed. At that point, he pulled Wallace from the game. Ben took the headband off and played out the first half, but when the second half began, he took the court with the headband on again. Skiles again yanked him from the game before play could start. Chicago hasn't seen a brazen act of defiance like that since Bill Wennington had his chest hair permed and frosted.

It's hard to imagine what Skiles has against headbands, but hey, those are the man's rules. You have to wonder if Ben Wallace is regretting signing with Chicago. His numbers right now are the worst they've been since 99/00 with Orlando, and had he stayed in Detroit, Flip Saunders would probably let him take the court in a coat made from bald eagle feathers before he said anything.

Skiles enforces the law [Chicago Sun-Times]

Chicago Bulls Mascots, Just One Step Ahead Of The Law

Rick Chandler — Wed, 05 Jul 2006 14:30:54 EDT

You're probably tired of hearing about NBA mascots attacking the police while driving mini-motorcycles at outdoor festivals — we know we are — but this one has a slight twist. The mascot, Benny the Bull of the Chicago Bulls, threw a punch at a sheriff's deputy, knocking off his glasses. The best part (to us) is that, when the police tried to stop Benny, he ran. He had naturally assumed that he could get away and blend into the crowd, while wearing a bright red Bull costume and riding a tiny motorcycle. Barry Anderson, 27, was charged with misdemeanor battery and driving within a parkway.

Oh, and this was the last graph of the AP story: "In 2005, another Bulls mascot, Da Bull, was sentenced to probation for 11/2 years for possession of cannabis with intent to deliver."

Thankfully, Ben Wallace heard of none of this before he signed.

Mess With The Bull Mascot, Get The Horns [MSNBC]
IndeBENdence Day [Blog A Bull]

Blowing Ben Wallace Up

Leitch — Thu, 06 Apr 2006 11:00:12 EDT

So here's a phrase you weren't ready to hear on a Thursday morning: "Ben Wallace Blow-Up Doll."

Detroit Bad Boys has the story; a product meant (apparently) to help kids deal with seven-foot tall Afroed centers called The Inflatable Defender.

The idea is that you blow up Ben and then, uh, just kind of put him in your driveway and let your kids drive around him. Definitely don't elbow him, though, or you'll end up with one of those neighborhood brawls.

When we received the email this morning informing us of the "NBA blow-up doll," we'll be honest, we had thought of something else entirely.

All The Fun, Half The Bruises [Detroit Bad Boys]
The Inflatable Defender [Official Site]