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Red Sox Skip Johnny Pesky's Funeral, Probably To Get Chicken And Beer…

In case you're keeping score at home, a non-comprehensive list of reasons why the Red Sox are six games under 500: The Red Sox used to drink too much in the clubhouse. The Red Sox aren't allowed to loosen up in the clubhouse. The Red Sox got too fat. Ownership is too concerned with Liverpool. Josh Beckett spent an… » 8/23/12 2:21pm 8/23/12 2:21pm

Hey, Look, The Boston Red Sox Are Smearing Their Manager Again

The Red Sox stink. This we know. They are 57-59, fourth place, the whole thing. Why they stink is not quite as clear. Cody Ross and David Ortiz are the only position players who have hit especially well, and no one (save, uh, Scott Achison) has pitched well. Does anybody know where Dustin Pedroia and Adrian Gonzalez… » 8/14/12 5:35pm 8/14/12 5:35pm

Boston's Clubhouse Beer Ban Is A Victory For Stupid People Everywhere

Jon Lester said he's not proud of what happened. Josh Beckett called it a "lapse in judgment." Clay Buchholz said he'll learn from "bad decisions." David Ortiz says it won't happen again. We will merely point out that a Major League Baseball team drank beer, and it's been a story for four-and-a-half months. » 2/27/12 2:15pm 2/27/12 2:15pm

Jon Lester Says They Probably Only "Ordered Chicken From Popeyes Like…

Lester tells the Boston Globe (though not Bob Hohler, who wrote this) that starting pitchers on their off-days were the only ones drinking during Red Sox games. "There's a perception out there that we were up there getting hammered and that wasn't the case... Most of the times it was one beer, a beer. It was like… » 10/17/11 1:35pm 10/17/11 1:35pm

When Jack McKeon Managed Beer-And-Chicken-Lovin' Josh Beckett In…

The Boston Globe story on the Red Sox's September collapse included a lot of semidamning revelations, among them that starters John Lackey, Josh Beckett, and Jon Lester ate fried chicken and drank beer while playing video games in the clubhouse during Sox games. Quelle dommage! Apparently Terry Francona lost control… » 10/12/11 8:15pm 10/12/11 8:15pm

What's The Most Dishonest Sentence In The Boston Globe's Red Sox…

There are so many nutty revelations in the Red Sox's self-serving/self-defeating exercise in blame and vengeance—and the revelations are so thoroughly unexamined by the Boston Globe reporters who wrote them down—you might think it would be hard to pick out the most ridiculous. The attacks on Adrian Gonzalez… » 10/12/11 2:21pm 10/12/11 2:21pm

Pitchers Hooked On Beer, Fried Chicken, And Video Games! Francona On…

It took two weeks, but the Boston Globe has produced the definitive grisly autopsy of the 2011 Boston Red Sox meltdown, and it's lurid, all right. (You'll recall that the team collapsed in epic fashion and missed the playoffs.) The Globe's story is full of drink and drugs and player grousing, but the story's existence… » 10/12/11 2:40am 10/12/11 2:40am

Read This Ode To Baltimore's Valiant Last Stand And Boston's Unexpected…

Our friends at Et tu, Mr. Destructo have composed the best reaction to the chaos of the final week of the MLB regular season. You should go read it. A snippet, from the prelude: "The only time a Bill James almanac should come out over seven games is if you find your chair leg wobbling as you lean back and watch. Great… » 10/07/11 2:10pm 10/07/11 2:10pm

Dan Shaughnessy, At Approximately 10 P.M. Wednesday: "The Red Sox…

Here's Dan Shaughnessy, during last night's rain delay, with the Sox leading the Orioles 3-2 and the Yankees leading the Rays 7-0: "I think the Rays are not going to win tonight. I think that's the one thing that we've eliminated tonight is that the Red Sox season is not going to end tonight. They live to play… » 9/29/11 11:08am 9/29/11 11:08am