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buffalo bills
blame canada
Canada Would Like You To Keep Your NFL To Yourself, Thank You
This handsome, strapping young gentleperson is Canadian Senator James Campbell. He's for the legalization of marijuana — obviously; come on, look at him! — and is known as a bit of a nationalist. How much so? He says the NFL should be banned from Canada because it threatens the CFL. More »
karl malone
Karl Malone Once Liked Them Very, VERY Young
So you know that story earlier this week about the Bills draftee who's the secret son of Karl Malone? Well, the plot thickens. According to The Buffalo News, Malone might have been robbing the cradle a little bit. More »
cold hard cash
Get Ready For The Toronto Bills
The Buffalo Bills will cross the border and play five regular season games in Toronto over the next five seasons, becoming the first NFL team to play annual games outside of the U.S. And for their trouble, they'll receive $78 million. Did the French and Indian War accomplish nothing? More »
karl malone's boy
Karl Malone's Son Is No Son Of His
The best story from yesterday's five rounds of the NFL Draft has to be that of Demetrius Bell, an offensive lineman out of Northwestern State drafted by the Buffalo Bills. He's the son of former Mexican-girl-chasing NBA superstar Karl Malone. Not that either Malone or Bell is particularly happy about it. More »
let berman say his stupid line about the bills
1st Round, Eleventh Overall: Bills Select Leodis McKelvin
Oh where do parents find names like "Leodis"? Well, smart guy, it turns out that Leodis was the Olde English name for the woods that eventually became the English township of Leeds. The word "Leodis" is mentioned several times by the Venerable Bede, and there are few sources as venerable as the Venerable Bede, who was known to kick back with a forty of Olde English in his day.
More »
nfl 2:45 update
Kevin Everett Picked The Wrong Game To Attend
For as much as he's been through this year, injured Bills tight end Kevin Everett has to be all confused why the Giants aren't exactly collapsing according to plan this late in the season. More »
That November 18 Patriots-Bills night game is gonna be awfully rowdy. [Buffalo News]
monday night football
The Bills Get The Monday Night Football Buzzsaw Treatment
Perhaps this is now going to become a yearly ritual on "Monday Night Football:" Franchise that rarely plays on Monday night shocks undefeated, heavily favorite road team and seemingly secures the win four or five times, thanks to the poor play of the young opposing quarterback. And then they lose in the most heartbreaking way possible. The Cowboys are what we thought they were, indeed. More »
monday night football
In honor of tonight's Cowboys-Bills "Monday Night Football" stint, we present this old, brilliant clip of a Bills fan awfully fired up before the Bills' Super Bowl loss to the Cowboys. We'd say the odds are pretty good this guy's dead by now. More »
Monday Night Football Makes The Bills Want To Shout
In honor of tonight's Cowboys-Bills "Monday Night Football" stint, we present this old, brilliant clip of a Bills fan awfully fired up before the Bills' Super Bowl loss to the Cowboys. We'd say the odds are pretty good this guy's dead by now. More »
kevin everett
Karma Smiles On The Buffalo Bills
As you've surely heard by now, there's some fantastic news about Bills tight end Kevin Everett: He's moving, and doctor's think he'll walk again. More »
nfl divisional previews
OK, it appears we are finally back. Boy, it's been a fun day to work for Gawker Media; it was extremely enjoyable to have people tell us what was happening on our site, since we couldn't see it and couldn't update it. Awesome. Anyway, to the AFC!
Hard to imagine anyone other than the ole' Patriots winning this one, but hey: Has Belichick been on the Sopranos? He has not. So there.
Some picks!
• AJ Daulerio: Patriots, Jets, Bills, Dolphins.
• Kissing Suzy Kolber: Patriots, Bills, Jets, Dolphins.
• Robert Weintraub, Slate: Patriots, Jets, Bills, Dolphins.
• Matt Pitzer, USA Today: Jets, Patriots, Bills, Dolphins.
• Aaron Schatz, Football Outsiders: Patriots, Jets, Bills, Dolphins.
• Sports Illustrated: Patriots, Jets, Bills, Dolphins.
• DEADSPIN: Patriots, Bills, Jets, Dolphins. We don't see a single way the Jets can duplicate what they did last year, even though, as has been mentioned a million times, they might be better. We have a hunch on those Bills, though.
As always, we know nothing.
It's The AFC East Pants Party
OK, it appears we are finally back. Boy, it's been a fun day to work for Gawker Media; it was extremely enjoyable to have people tell us what was happening on our site, since we couldn't see it and couldn't update it. Awesome. Anyway, to the AFC!
Hard to imagine anyone other than the ole' Patriots winning this one, but hey: Has Belichick been on the Sopranos? He has not. So there.
Some picks!
• AJ Daulerio: Patriots, Jets, Bills, Dolphins.
• Kissing Suzy Kolber: Patriots, Bills, Jets, Dolphins.
• Robert Weintraub, Slate: Patriots, Jets, Bills, Dolphins.
• Matt Pitzer, USA Today: Jets, Patriots, Bills, Dolphins.
• Aaron Schatz, Football Outsiders: Patriots, Jets, Bills, Dolphins.
• Sports Illustrated: Patriots, Jets, Bills, Dolphins.
• DEADSPIN: Patriots, Bills, Jets, Dolphins. We don't see a single way the Jets can duplicate what they did last year, even though, as has been mentioned a million times, they might be better. We have a hunch on those Bills, though.
As always, we know nothing.
nfl season preview
NFL Season Preview: Buffalo Bills
Believe it or not, folks, the NFL season is much closer than you can possibly imagine. So close, in fact, that, if we're going to fit in every NFL team preview by the start of the season, we have to go this early. So there you have it.
Last year, we asked some of our favorite writers to opine why Their Favorite Team Was Better Than Yours. Ultimately, we found this constrictive, and it also might have killed James Frey. So this time, we've just asked them to just run free, talk about their team, their experience as a fan, their hopes, their dreams, their desires for oral sex. All our teams are now assigned; if you sent us an email and we didn't get back to you, we're sorry, and we accept your scorn. But today: The Buffalo Bills.
Your author is Jack Kukoda, a staff writer for the Onion News Network and an occasional contributor to American Hockey Fan. His words are after the jump.
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buffalo bills
Willis McGahee Is Easily Replaced
With the 12th pick of the NFL Draft, the Buffalo Bills select Marshawn Lynch, RB, Cal. Mike Tanier of Football Outsiders tells you all about it. More »
nfl
NFL General Managers Make It Rain
The first twenty-four hours of the NFL's free agency period have come and gone. There was a flurry of activity last evening ... let's get ourselves caught up. More »
nfl
You Stay Classy, Buffalo
The wisdom of sending more of our troops to Iraq is making less and less sense to us, mostly because there are bitter, liquored-up Bills fans wandering around with nothing to do. Meet Patriots' fan Barry Donaghey, who was simply trying to enjoy a tailgate celebration with his pregnant wife following visiting New England's 28-6 win over the Bills on Sunday. More »
nfl
Sir, Please Allow Me To Retort
The Bills play the Patriots this weekend, and, just for shits and giggles, we present you this video of a Bills fan from last year who would like everyone to know that, in his opinion, the Bills have a more skilled roster and a better coaching stuff than the Patriots. More »
nfl
