The premise of the bit was an interview with the members of the Padilla Flotilla—it rhymes if you're actually a member of the Spanish Armada—who used to be the personal fan club of Vicente Padilla, but have renounced their hero since he's pitching for the Dodgers tonight. Then a cab driver in a Yankee jersey drove by and started heckling them. So Jerrick, always the professional, chased the cabbie off with cardboard boat oar. He then continued the interview by asking if these youngsters, seeking a new Phillie hero to throw their allegiance behind, could "ride the Cooch Train?"

Thank heavens he didn't direct that question toward the girl or this post would have a very different set of tags. The female anchor politely pointed out that Jerrick was actually referring to the Chooch Train, in honor of Carlos Ruiz. Believe it or not, there are actually two Chooch fan clubs fighting for Chooch supremacy. Mike Alfonso, leader of the "Chooch-Chooch Train" demands that his group be granted the true Chooch throne.

"We tailgate with authentic Panamanian beer and an inflatable sombrero beer cooler - all approved by Ivan the Cart Guy, who works outside my building and is from Panama," Alfonso wrote.

Wait, there's more. Philadelphia city workers have spent most of the day greasing light posts throughout the city, as if that would somehow stop a determined drunk from scaling one tonight.

So it's come to this, Philly? Ivan The Cart Guy is the arbiter of taste? Greased poles and inflatable sombrero beer coolers? Could Yankee fans actually end up looking like the civilized ones here?

Although, I have to grudgingly admit that this is pretty cool. Now go home and get your shine box.

Padilla Flotilla [Fox29]
All aboar+d the Chooch-Chooch Train [Daily News]
Quite Possibly The Greatest Thing Ever [The Fightins]

And, oh, yes...it's time to officially start worrying about Brad Lidge. Brad Lidge is "tired"?

Good news for Milwaukee fans, though — C.C. Sabathia is not:

“Everybody who knows me and that’s close to me knows how competitive I am,” Sabathia said. “If I’m healthy enough . . . to pitch, they’re not going to tell me not to because I’m not going to listen to it. We’re going to end up getting into an argument.”

And in other cooch-related news, there's this amusing anecdote featuring a drunken Phillies cretin heckling some Brewers fans in the stands:

About three rows in front of them a Phillies fan was feeling no pain. He turned and gave the couple a piece of his mind. The Brewers fans ignored him

My friend describes what happened next:

"The subjects had an unknown projectile thrown in their direction."

My friend is a lawyer. Forgive him.

"I think it was a peanut. The guy in the Braun shirt didn't do anything. He was just being stoic. Kinda taking the lumps you might get if you go into enemy territory."

In the ninth, the game tightens up. So does the obnoxious Phillies fan, described as an ordinary-looking guy in his 30s. A clean, well-lighted cretin.

"Fielder is up, and we're all sitting there worried that he's gonna knock one out of the park, and that's when the Phillies fan starts acting up. You know when you toss a beer at someone, but hold onto the bottle so you just flick your wrist? He did that. He doused the guy with his beer. A full frontal, he gave. And the Brewers fan still didn't do anything.

But the section of Phillies fans that surrounded the couple did.

"A good half a dozen Phillies fans converged on this guy and just friggin gave it to him. He got no support for his antics. The whole section was pointing at him and berating him. They got him tossed out immediately."

Afterward, my friend reports, a lot of people approached the couple to apologize.

If the Phillies lost, that apology probably wouldn't be as forthcoming. And that cup of beer most likely would have been some sort of animal urine that they smuggled in.

Two more to go...

Jumping back into the fire [JS Online]
Good news: Lidge is now tired [Philly.com]
The Polite Phillies Fans [Blinq]