The NFL analyst who shall not be named that took a picture of his penis with a cell phone camera and has shown it to numerous, uncomfortable women, then was suspended by his network for it. Absolute true story. Please make sure to clean off the mirror when you are done with it.

First of all, you can relax, because I don't have the photo. Also, thank God it was Salisbury and not Berman, because those "You're With Me, Leather" t-shirts might have had to look completely different. And I doubt that they'd have sold very well.

I'm also wondering what Harold Reynolds could have done that was much worse than this. What did Reynolds do, run around showing people pictures of Peter Gammons' junk?

TBL Investigation: That was Easy. We Found that Perverted NFL Analyst That Was Suspended [The Big Lead]
Guess the Suspended, Perverted NFL Analyst [The Big Lead]
Pro Football Talk Rumor Mill [ProFootballTalk.com]
Take a look at this year's All-Selfish team [CBS Sportsline]

We got a tip this morning from a guy who says he was out with a couple of ladyfriends last night when they encountered Steelers kicker Jeff Reed. The story goes that Reed was hitting on these two ladies, was eventually shot down, and then Jeff Reed did what any of us would have done: he stood in front of a mirror, pushed his pants down, and took a picture of the top of his junk.

He then sent said picture to the ladies to let them know what they were missing out on. Since then, the ladies went into a deep depression, began to cut their arms, and are now both currently having sex with David Akers.

Now, I can't promise you that any of that is true. I can't even tell you for sure that that's Jeff Reed. If it is, though... I seriously doubt that Jeff Reed's the type of guy who will be the least bit embarrassed about this.

I've always thought Reed was a pretty good kicker, and I'll tell you what—that guy knows his way around a razor, too.