How Hulk Became The World's Most Underappreciated Superstar

If there's one good thing about the handful of great players plying their trade in Russia—and it would be the only good thing, mind you—it's that their home Champions League ties often start a few hours before the rest. That timeslot gives their abilities at least a modicum of the attention they deserve yet so often… » 10/01/14 10:06am Today 10:06am

Polish Fans Hoist Giant Anti-UEFA Banner

Legia Warsaw fans are still salty after getting DQ'd from the Champions League for fielding a suspended player, despite beating Celtic 6-1 on aggregate. So today, two days after Celtic were themselves knocked out, Legia fans raised this display: a big fat pig surrounded by the UEFA logo, with the caption "6<1 Because… » 8/28/14 5:05pm 8/28/14 5:05pm

Striker Scores On Insane Long-Distance Volley


Today's soccer hotness comes from a Champions League match in Sweden, where Malmo's Magnus Eriksson launched a ridiculous left-footed strike from well outside the box over the head of Salzburg goalkeeper Péter Gulácsi. Malmo's keeper launched the ball into a scrum deep in Salzburg territory. Meanwhile, Eriksson was… » 8/27/14 6:13pm 8/27/14 6:13pm

Real Madrid Win Champions League After Atlético Finally Run Out Of Gas

Atlético Madrid—at least the unrelenting, ever-charging, indefatigable version that has taken Madrid, Spain, Europe, and the entire soccer-loving world by storm this season—outclassed, out-ran, and out-fought Real Madrid en route to a 1-0 Champions League win on Saturday. Unfortunately, that iteration of Atlético only… » 5/26/14 1:57pm 5/26/14 1:57pm

Atlético Madrid's Diego Simeone Is The World's Dopest Manager

Atlético Madrid and Barcelona are set to play the biggest league game in the history of the world today. Most of the cast in this production are well known—Barça are still Barça, though by all accounts their manager is not long for this city; we've touched on Atléti's players before—but the total badassery of the… » 5/17/14 10:00am 5/17/14 10:00am

Atlético Madrid Beat Barça In Champions League, Dream Season Continues

It's all fun and games cheering on plucky upstarts Atlético Madrid, right up until the point they tear out your heart and play keepy-uppy with it. So excuse me if I'm not appropriately excited about Atlético's thoroughly deserved and enjoyable-for-neutrals 1-0 Champions League win over Barcelona. » 4/09/14 5:37pm 4/09/14 5:37pm

Sad Man United Score Great Goal, Then Get Pounded In Champions League

So...the gig's up. Manchester United, who have played like absolute dog shit all season long, almost definitely won't play in the Champions League next season. After drawing defending CL champions FC Bayern last week in the first leg of their quarterfinal, they needed to avoid a loss in Germany to advance to the… » 4/09/14 4:58pm 4/09/14 4:58pm

Typical José: Chelsea's Champions League Win Was Right On Schedule

José Mourinho's teams are some goddamn cockroaches, man. Just when you think you've got them squashed, their viscous innards seeping from their corrugated underbelly—as PSG could've justifiably believed, leading Chelsea 3-1 after the first leg of their Champions League tie—they somehow keep right on crawling and end… » 4/09/14 2:03pm 4/09/14 2:03pm

Watch The Stunning Champions League Strike That Put Atléti Up On Barça

Barcelona welcomed Atlético Madrid to the Camp Nou today in what is becoming a regular rivalry of increasingly large stakes. It was a Champions League matchup this time, as tense and cagey as you'd expect—that is, until Diego decided he'd had enough and straight flattened a ball into the net from about 25 yards. » 4/01/14 5:05pm 4/01/14 5:05pm

Manchester United Get A Big Win, Remain Soccer's Funniest Joke

Coaches and players often say, when asked whether something or other has added fire to an upcoming game, that if just being in the Big Time Sporting Event doesn't motivate you, you're beyond hope anyway. If that's true, then Manchester United's passion-filled 3-0 comeback against Olympiakos probably doesn't say much… » 3/20/14 5:04pm 3/20/14 5:04pm