Over the past few months, MortenWerder and their fleet of anonymous busybodies have dropped the following bombshells on us:

"Sources: Favre anguished over choice," July 24

"Sources: Favre throws for Vikings," July 13

"Source: Favre to be monitored in Miss.," June 12

"Sources: Vikings back off Favre some," June 10

"Sources: Vikings want answer this week," June 9

"Source: Favre doesn't want surgery," May 19

"Source: Favre looking for options," May 15

"Source: Favre, Vikings to meet," May 7

"Sources: Favre won't need major surgery," Dec. 30, 2008

"Source: Favre has 'itch' to return; player calls it 'rumor,'" July 3, 2008

The biggest story of all, of course, was Favre's ultimate decision to stay retired, which he relayed to Vikings coach Brad Childress in a phone call yesterday. And who got the scoop? The Minneapolis Star Tribune.

Brett Favre takes a pass on joining Vikings [Star Tribune]

Late last night, ESPN.com posted a story by Chris Mortensen—that has since been removed from the front page—saying that the Oakland Raiders were in talks to sell a controlling stake of the team to a billionaire investor who has allegedly tried to buy other NFL teams so that he can move them to Los Angeles. (As if anyone in L.A. wants them.) The Raiders furiously denied such a tale, and included some pointed jabs at Mortensen's fabled "reporting."

"Chris' report is not true," Trask told The Associated Press. "We are not negotiating with this group. We know who they are and that they want to purchase the controlling interest in a team. This team is not available to them. They are unhappy about that and have turned to Chris to assist them in their efforts, which is easy to do since Chris contacted no one with the Raiders to ascertain if there was any truth to his report. There is not. It would have been so easy for him to contact us and ask if we are negotiating with this group. We are not."

Well, okay then. Mortensen responded to that claim in an email to Associated Press, which he quoted in an ESPN.com story that he apparently wrote about himself. (His byline was removed from the top of the story, but his bio remains at the bottom.)

"The Raiders have lost the privilege with me of running stories past them for comment," the e-mail stated. "This stems from their history of denials to most stories I have reported — as well as others in the media — when those stories have eventually proven to be true. The latest example is I reported that Al Davis planned to interview Giants offensive coordinator Kevin Gilbride and, of course, the story was trashed by a team spokesman."

Lost the privilege? This is delicious. Oh, wait, Chris would like to clarify.

"Upon further review, I should not have qualified any potential communication with the Raiders as a 'privilege.' I'd say they have repeatedly diminished and discouraged efforts to reach out for an official comment based on the repeated denials of prior stories," Mortensen said. "It also would be an assumption on their part that I have not had any contact with the Raiders while reporting on this story."

Aww, don't back down. PR/reporter hissy fits are the only reason to care about anything that happens at the Coliseum these days. I nominate "Raiders get sold" for most boring story of 2009, but think "Head of ESPN reporter tossed around Oakland tailgate like beach ball" would be a great news peg for the start of next season.

Sources: Raiders trying to sell more of team [ESPN.com]

That is to say: He could definitely beat up Jim Gray.

Anyway, do you like the Chris Mortensen? Do you not like the Chris Mortensen? Let us know.

And by that, we mean, "Vote," because it's February, and it's a slow sports month.

Gawker Media polls require Javascript; if you're viewing this in an RSS reader, click through to view in your Javascript-enabled web browser.

Chris Mortensen woke up yesterday morning to learn most of his home and landscaping had been destroyed.

What was once a tranquil home for Chris Mortensen and his family, turned upside down during Monday night's bout with severe weather. "I didn't know what happened until I woke up in the morning. I looked around, and told my wife, 'you need to get up.' I don't think she was too excited to look at it all," says Mortensen.

It may take up to six months to clean everything up. But in the meantime, he says he will be better prepared the next time a storm hits. He says, "I'm a light sleeper, but you can't worry about this kind of stuff. God's in control, and he's protecting us."

We wish Mortensen luck in reconstructing his home; we've had family members' homes destroyed by tornadoes in the past, so we know how awful that can be. We just feel extra bad for Mortensen, because he had just reported that, according to sources, his house was going to be just fine. Hey, it happens.

ESPN Analyst's Home Damaged
Play Media [NWAhomepage]

(Note: "NWAhomepage" is, sadly, not about the old rap group.)

ESPN's Chris Mortensen — who must be ecstatic that his career has progressed to the point that he's filing breaking news briefs about whether or not a 26-year-old man had some pot on him — reported yesterday that no marijuana was found in Vick's famous water bottle and that he will be "exonerated on all charges." This begs the question, of course: Why was Vick so damned concerned about giving up the water bottle in the first place? Does he disagree with our nation's policy concerning beverages on planes? Was he just extremely thirsty?

The world might never know, but at least we can breathe easier knowing that Michael Vick has nothing to do with the demon weed. Let's just focus on what's on the field, people; in that regard, Vick is without reproach. Totally.

Vick Will Be Exonerated For Miami Incident [ESPN]
If You Can't Stash Your Pot In A Water Bottle And Get On A Plane, The Terrorists Have Already Won [Deadspin