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god bless the bengals of the beast
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Cincinnati Bengals
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god bless the bengals of the beast
do they need defense?
1st Round, Ninth Overall: Bengals Select Keith Rivers
Keep standing pat, ye mighty Bengals! The Jags and Pats leapt over you to take defenders you so badly needed, guys you targeted so heavily that you sent your line coach to molest them at their pro days. Your star wide receiver plans to toilet paper team headquarters. Your other receiver, whose name I don't dare try to type in real time, is also miffed. Stay the course. Don't do anything rash. Sucking indefinitely isn't as bad as it sounds.
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chad johnson
Chad Johnson's Attitude Reaches New Level Of Stinko-ness
It was only a couple years ago when Bengals' wide receiver Chad Johnson was cause celebre to NFL fans; his defiance against the league for his wacky endzone celebrations seemed harmless and amusing, even if it did cost his team the occasional 15-yard penalty. He was also quotable, seemingly self-aware, and had all the skills to become the elite, Hall of Fame receiver he prematurely considered himself. But as his displeasure with the Bengals became more public (he seemingly could not find one redeeming quality about any aspect of the organization that gave him a monster contract extension two years ago), he slowly transformed from a colorful personality into a less talented, more annoying version of Terrell Owens. More »
chris henry
Piling On Chris Henry, Just Once More
Like Tuffy said last night on our radio show, Chris Henry is like Pacman Jones without the Eddie Haskell-type contrition, and it's just way more depressing. And now that he's been cut by the Cincinnati Bengals, it's no longer really a sports story, but a troubled human interest story. Which makes this particular story relevant on a sports blog in the ex post facto sense, because the night before Henry punched a teenager, he and some other Bengals were thrown out of a Cincinnati nightclub. More »
that's it
ESPN yakkity-yak Brian Kenny displayed the appropriate amount of annoyance and amusement during his teeth-pulling interview with aggrieved Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson. Kenny, not getting too much out of Chad besides his usual grousing (although, Johnson did say he wouldn't sit out next season) attempted to gracefully sign off from the interview. More »
Brian Kenny's Media Approval Rating Went Up A Little Bit
ESPN yakkity-yak Brian Kenny displayed the appropriate amount of annoyance and amusement during his teeth-pulling interview with aggrieved Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson. Kenny, not getting too much out of Chad besides his usual grousing (although, Johnson did say he wouldn't sit out next season) attempted to gracefully sign off from the interview. More »
chris henry
Chris Henry. Arrested. Again. Really, Chris? Really? (UPDATE: And Now He's Gone)
Chris Henry is going to be arrested again. This is a statement you probably could have made at any point in the last, oh, three years. But it's one you can make specifically for today. Because Chris Henry is being arrested today. More »
Chad Johnson Might Want To Play For The Redskins
The Bengals are adamant: They're not trading Chad Johnson. But it appears Chad Johnson has a differing view. Sorry, Chad: Even in Washington, you can't put Ocho Cinco on the back of your jersey.
The Bengals are adamant: They're not trading Chad Johnson. But it appears Chad Johnson has a differing view. Sorry, Chad: Even in Washington, you can't put Ocho Cinco on the back of your jersey.
good ole chris henry
Well, Look Who's In Trouble Again
Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Chris Henry was just reinstated to the NFL after an eight-game suspension. That's good. Police are already investigating him for another incident. That's bad. More »
just give me the damn cue
No matter what anyone says, it's still hard to adjust to the notion of Keyshawn Johnson wearing a suit and being introduced by Chris Berman. It's like the spectacle of Sitting Bull as part of Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show. Keyshawn was not meant to be tamed. More »
Chad Johnson Wants You To Keep The Tape Rolling
No matter what anyone says, it's still hard to adjust to the notion of Keyshawn Johnson wearing a suit and being introduced by Chris Berman. It's like the spectacle of Sitting Bull as part of Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show. Keyshawn was not meant to be tamed. More »
monday night football
Pity Poor John Bowie
As the Patriots cruised to yet another easy victory last night, with three more Tom Brady touchdowns and two more Randy Moss touchdowns, we take a look at the sad sack that is John Bowie. More »
monday night football
Will The Patriots Score 38 Again?
This could be the last stand for the Bengals, early on anyway, and they're playing the absolute worst team you could play right now if you needed to make a last stand. Unfortunately, everyone's just going to talk about that CameraGate situation all night. Again. More »
poop
Bring Your Umbrellas To Paul Brown Stadium On Monday
There might be no better metaphor for the beginning of the Cincinnati Bengals' season than the fact that fans have been noticing bird poop in their beers. More »
free cars!
Chris Henry Probably Isn't Felonious; Just Dumb
We know what suspended Bengals wide receiver Chris Henry was doing on Sunday; he was watching football with our own MJD. And now we know what he doing the rest of the week; accidentally stealing rental cars. More »
nfl roundup
Please, No More MNF Doubleheaders
We're not sure why, exactly, we feel compelled to write about a game that we spent four hours writing about last night and just ended about eight hours ago ... and, oh yeah, was completely miserable to watch. But, alas, here we are. More »
monday night football
We noted that during the preseason, we enjoyed the work of the revamped "Monday Night Football" team; replacing Joe Theismann with Ron Jaworski really did make that much of a difference. But that was preseason. More »
Monday Night Football Returns ... And An Invitation
We noted that during the preseason, we enjoyed the work of the revamped "Monday Night Football" team; replacing Joe Theismann with Ron Jaworski really did make that much of a difference. But that was preseason. More »
nfl divisional previews
Three fascinating teams in the AFC North ... and then the one that has Brady Quinn. What's not to like? More »
It's The AFC North Pants Party
Three fascinating teams in the AFC North ... and then the one that has Brady Quinn. What's not to like? More »
monday night football
If you watched "Monday Night Football" earlier this week, you might have noticed a new segment called ESPN's Rowdy Friends, in which fans are encouraged to shoot videos of them acting like idiots — which is what networks and leagues think we are, as they remind us daily — so the "best" ones can be weaved into the "MNF" broadcast. The segment debuted last week, even though we hadn't seen any advertisements for it on the site. So how'd they pull it off? Well, the way any major corporation would: By making the lackeys do it! More »
ESPN's "Fans" Seem To All Have espn.com Email Addresses
If you watched "Monday Night Football" earlier this week, you might have noticed a new segment called ESPN's Rowdy Friends, in which fans are encouraged to shoot videos of them acting like idiots — which is what networks and leagues think we are, as they remind us daily — so the "best" ones can be weaved into the "MNF" broadcast. The segment debuted last week, even though we hadn't seen any advertisements for it on the site. So how'd they pull it off? Well, the way any major corporation would: By making the lackeys do it! More »
nfl season preview
NFL Season Preview: Cincinnati Bengals
Believe it or not, folks, the NFL season is much closer than you can possibly imagine. So close, in fact, that, if we're going to fit in every NFL team preview by the start of the season, running one every weekday, we have to start this week. So there you have it.
Last year, we asked some of our favorite writers to opine why Their Favorite Team Was Better Than Yours. Ultimately, we found this constrictive, and it also might have killed James Frey. So this time, we've just asked them to just run free, talk about their team, their experience as a fan, their hopes, their dreams, their desires for oral sex. We have two teams left unassigned, so if you've got a jones to write about the Oakland Raiders or the Baltimore Ravens, email us to let us know why you're perfect. But today: The Bengals.
Your author is Robert Weintraub, a freelance TV producer/writer based in Atlanta who writes about sports media for Slate. His words are after the jump.
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