• Griffin does it all to secure a win. Oklahoma was carried to a narrow 80-76 victory on the shoulders of super-soph Blake Griffin. The 6'10" 250 pound monster tallied career highs in both points and rebounds with 35 and 21 respectively. Oh and he also led the team in assists with 5. The Runnin' Bulldogs of Gardner Webb drop another heartbreaker, their third straight to start the season following losses to Virgina Tech and Longwood by a combined four points. As for their mascot, I grew up with a bulldog and she did very little running. But when she did it was pretty awesome.

• Blair puts the Zoo in a frenzy. Pitt man-child Dejuan Blair exploded with his biggest game of the season, a 27 point and 18 rebound performance in Pitt's 86-60 dismantling of Indiana University of Pennsylvania. The 6'7" center missed just one shot attempt and even had the opposing coach likening him to a much larger man.

"That was DeJuan? I thought that was Shaq," said IUP coach Joe Lombardi, a former Pitt assistant. "He was a man in waiting last year, but he's arrived."

One day all teams will be coached by former Pitt coaches.

• Samuels makes his debut in the Lou'. For fans of the Louisville Cardinals this day couldn't come soon enough. Samardo Samuels, the star freshman forward from St. Benedict's prep in Newark, NJ, finally got his first taste of game action in Louisville's first contest of the year. The Cardinals crushed Morehead State 79-41 to open the Billy Minardi Classic, which is apparently some sort of awful tournament. Samuels led all scorers with 18 points while adding five rebounds in 23 minutes.

• Monroe might elicit some favorable comparisons. Greg Monroe, the latest in a long line of dominant centers from Georgetown University, dominated in every facet of the game in his team's 81-53 win over Drexel. Monroe finished the game with 20 points, eight rebounds, four assists, three steals and three blocks in 31 minutes.

• UNC's golden son Tyler Hansbrough played well in his first game back on the court after his season was delayed by a minor leg injury. The Tar Heels knocked off UC Santa Barbara in a 84-67 win. According to UNC coach Roy Williams, Hansbrough was a gametime decision, a decision that I'm sure was influenced by the injury to the "other Tyler" Zeller.

But players injuries seem to be the least of the problems with last night's game. According to the wire reports,"Santa Barbara's rabid students were warned by the public address announcer before tip-off to keep their chants clean." Boy, there is nothing worse than fans with rabies.

• Stephen Curry had yet another impressive performance with 30 points and a career-high 13 assists in Davidson's 97-70 trouncing of Winthrop last night. The nation's leading scorer is making his transition from shooting guard to point guard quite well.

"I'm still making mistakes out there, making careless turnovers," Curry insisted. "I've got to figure out how to control the ball a little better. I think in transition I've got it pretty much where I need to be."

I'm filling in my bracket already. Davidson FTW.

(1) North Carolina 86, Pennsylvania 71
Playing without superstar Tyler Hansbrough, who's still recovering from his shin being stressed out from all of the relentless pressure of his massive course load, the Tar Heels went ahead and gave freshmen Tyler Zeller (18 points) and Ed Davis (14 rebounds) a chance to work off their Freshmen 15 with some extended playing him.

(11) Gonzaga 83, Mont St Billings 52
In this much-anticipated battle between a team whose best players historically look like 70s porn stars and the college that sounds like a porn star, the former won handily behind the strong showing by their two 6-foot-11 behemoths, Austin Daye and Josh Heytvelt.

(12) Memphis 90, Fairfield 63
Memphis was actually losing for about half of the first-half, but then freshman Tyreke Evans decided to start taking the proceedings seriously, put up 19 points, and the rest, as they say, it's extremely boring history.

(13) Tennessee 114, Chattanooga 75
The Vols just couldn't stop helping one another out! Breaking their old school-record, Tennessee had 32 assists in only 43 baskets. We can all learn something from the Vols: sharing is caring. Except when its communism.

(16) Miami (FL) 96, Florida Southern 60
I'm not going to say much about this one, other than a plea that, if it hasn't already been established, we collectively refer to freshman DeQuan Jones lovingly as "Dukie" from now on. Deal?

(21) USC 78, UC Irvine 55
Freshman DeMar DeRozen left the DeCharge in his DeDebut with 14 points, forcing Tim Floyd to spend the night in his chambers, contemplating over candlelight how to keep him from DePulling the old "wham, bam, thank you ma'am" like O.J. Mayo did last year.

(2) UCONN 81, Western Carolina 55
ManMonster Hasheem Thabeet went defensive-minded, swatting away five pitiful shots from the opposition and bringing down a career-high 17 rebounds. FUN FACT: Every semester, WCU publishes their own humor magazine named "The Gadfly", which is an anagram for "Glad Hefty", which in turn is the definition of Frank Caliendo.

(6) Pittsburgh 86, Farleigh Dickinson 63
Levance Fields finally came back from his foot issues to put up 15 points and eight assists. FUN FACT: A notable alumnus of Farleigh Dickinson is Stephanie Adams, a 1992 Playboy Playmate who has spent her post-nude time authoring 17 "metaphysical books", whatever that means.

(8) Texas 68, Stetson 38
A.J. Adams scoffed at the moved-back 3-point line, sinking five from beyond the arch. It was the 18th time in his collegiate career he's made at least five 3-pointers in a game. FUN FACT: Stetson hosts the nation's first and oldest "Model U.S. Senate", which features students playing make believe that they're actual U.S. Senators. But presumably without the "illicit sex with their pages" part of the job.

(17) Marquette 95, Houston Baptist 64
Here's a telling stat to show you just how worthless these early contests are: Marquette won handily despite only going 5-for-22 on 3-pointers. FUN FACT: This fall is the first time Houston Baptist has been on the semester system, choosing to give up their time-honored tradition of handing out grades quarterly and probably angering God in the process.

(20) Davidson 107, Guilford 83
Stephen Curry came one menial steal short from collecting a triple-double, but since he registered a block it seems wrong not to give him one anyone. FUN FACT: Guilford's mascot, The Fighting Quaker, is a walking oxymoron, seeing as the Quakers are traditionally a peaceful people.

And some other contests around the league:

Stanford 75, Yale 67
This one's getting blamed on Bush too.

Illinois 66, Eastern Washington 50
Somewhere, awash in a sea of women who really, really seem into him, your old editor nods in approval.

Oh yeah, and once-proud Kentucky hilariously lost to Virginia Military 111-103. Thankfully, the folks at Storming the Floor have a nice little writeup about it. Head that-a-way.

I just found out that a guy who works in my office reads the Closer. You know how I found out? Because he sent me a Motivational Platitude for today. Actually, this is an anti-platitude, uttered by that old softie Moe as he coached a softball team on The Simpsons:

All right you ragtag bunch of misfits, you hate me, and I hate you even more, but without my beloved ringers, you're all I've got. So I, uh, want you to remember some inspiring things that someone else may have told you in the course of your lives and go out there and win."

Thanks, Andrew, that's perfect. Especially for the Sunday finals, which mostly feature power-conference teams packed with McDonalds All-Americans.

In other news, I've finally caved. I really wanted to call Michael Beasley the Player of the Year, and argue it to death, but Beasley's team flopped to a lower-seeded Texas A&M team in the Big 12 Semis, while Tyler Hansbrough knocked in the winning shot over Virginia Tech with :01 on the clock to move his Tar Heels into the ACC finals. Good show, bowl-cutted white dude. Good show. I guess Beasley will just have to console himself by shaking David Stern's hand within the first five minutes of the NBA Draft.

Today's Championship Action

This is the last day for conference tournaments, though I'm not sure what we'll do if another tornado hits the SEC tournament in Atlanta. The Meaningful Collateral thinks it never should have gotten this far. They say cancel it, and give the auto-bid to Tennessee. Thoughts, concerns, questions? No? Then let's get it on.

ACC Final: #3 Clemson vs. #1 UNC. Well, "pulling a Clemson" has a whole new meaning now. The Tigers look good in their dark blue unis with orange accents, but this may be the last time they have to wear them this season. This is their first ACC final in 46 years. UNC barely nipped Virginia Tech, as Tyler Hansbrough took the big shot yet again. Sadly, he also felt the need to run down the court with his eyes closed, high-stepping and windmilling his arms. And that's why a lot of people are looking for any excuse to name Michael Beasley as POY.

Big Ten Final: #10 Illinois vs. #1 Wisconsin. What is this, tennis? And the ten-seed vs. one-seed is the widest seed disparity for a final this season, though the SEC result is somehow even crazier. This would be the lowest seed to ever make the Big Ten final, except that the Illini took a #11 to the Championship game in 1999. Oh yeah, and they're facing the #1-seeded Wisconsin Badgers. Don't Stop Believin'.

Big 12 Final: #2 Kansas vs. #1 Texas. This is getting to be a broken record. These two teams have met for the Big 12 championship the last three times it was played, and one or the other has been in the game eight out of the past 10 years. Look for both teams to spread the scoring around and play tough defense. Depending on other conference results, this could be for a #1 seed in the NCAAs.

SEC Final: #6E Georgia vs. #W2 Arkansas. Just an insane tournament for the SEC. First the hallways of the Georgia Dome look like outtakes from "Titanic," and now this. Georgia played what amounted to a double-header against superior competition, and won both. Is there anything these Bulldogs can't do? Arkansas is riding high on a last-second defeat of Tennessee, after lightly regarded seven-foot Senior Steven Hill dropped in his only two points of the evening at exactly the right moment.

Southland Final: #7 Texas-Arlington vs. #5 Northwestern State. You may remember Northwestern State from their 2006 upset of Iowa (yes, I know, Lady Andrea, I'll just go ahead and get bent now). Arlington, on the other hand, has never been to the Big Dance, and built a highly suspect 20-11 record by touring the community colleges of Texas (not literally, but close). Coolest name on the UTA roster belongs to Freshman Center Trey Parker. Hey! He invented South Park!

In with Auto Bids: Cornell (Ivy), Winthrop (Big South), Belmont (Atlantic Sun), Austin Peay (Ohio Valley), Drake (Missouri Valley), George Mason (CAA), Siena (MAAC), San Diego (WCC), Butler (Horizon), Davidson (SoCon), Oral Roberts (Summit), Western Kentucky (Sun Belt), Mount St. Mary's (NEC), Portland State (Big Sky), American University (Patriot), UMBC (AEC), Memphis (C-USA), Temple (Atlantic 10), UNLV (Mountain West), Kent State (MAC), Mississippi Valley State (SWAC), Coppin State (MEAC), Pittsburgh (Big East), Boise State (WAC), Cal State Fullerton (Big West)
Selection Sunday Live Blog: Bizarro Joe Lunardi
Check back shortly after the Selection Sunday show to get the Deadspin version of bracket analysis. Then regional previews begin on Monday, along with all the Pants Party fun you can shake a stick at.

Technology has enhanced my college basketball viewing experience in many ways this season. There's the flat-screen TV that makes the players look like human beings instead of fuzzy blobs. There's the satellite package that brings arcane channels full of small-conference basketball beyond the city limits, and there's DVRs to tape the games I have to miss, and the high definition networks that sharpen the images to amazing levels.

All that was great until I took advantage of my access to the Big Ten Network last night. I was keeping an eye on the Illinois/Purdue game, and even admiring the multi-colored petals of the new Big Ten Tournament logo. Then came halftime. The studio hosts have a cushy platform above the action in the United Center, and they do the usual talking head analysis, which is OK. But then the director, for reasons unknown, decides to give us a close-up of Gene Keady, the designated ex-coach pundit for the network. Gene Keady's whole head, in High Def! It's crueler than waterboarding.

Ladies and gents, it was not a pretty sight. God Save the Fan, indeed. I'm a little wiser now - I can plan to watch a game and just skip halftime. But I learned the hard way last night.

The Games

Today's games are all important, so we'll just go conference by conference and see what huge matchup has come from the morass of upsets and unusual winners.

America East Final: #1 Maryland-Baltimore County vs. #2 Hartford. These two teams split their season series, and each game was a one-point win. Expect a close one. Neither team has ever been to the Big Dance, so this is kind of like two virgins hooking up.

ACC Semifinals: #1 UNC vs. #4 Virginia Tech and #2 Duke vs. #3 Clemson. The only upset along the way to this textbook seed pairing was Boston College over Maryland in the first round, which just saved us a step. This tournament is being played in Charlotte Bobcats Arena, so clearly the Chamber of Commerce will be rooting for the 1 vs. 2 matchup here.

Atlantic 10 Final: #5 St. Joseph's vs. #2 Temple. If you're planning on visiting Atlantic City for a casual day of gambling and staring at the Trump Casino, pick another weekend. Hordes of Philadelphians will be heading to the Boardwalk and there probably won't be a lot of brotherly love. A great game? Probably.

Big East Final: #1 Georgetown vs. #7 Pitt. I choose to view this as a battle between historical figures George Washington and William Pitt. That makes it funnier, doesn't it? Maybe a little. Otherwise, this will be a big vs. little game, as Pitt favors a guard-heavy lineup. The fact that the Hoyas seem poised to grab the auto-bid probably presages some kind of strange upset.

Big Ten Semifinals: #1 Wisconsin vs. #4 Michigan State and #10 Illinois vs. #6 Minnesota. These games should be fun for completely different reasons. Wisconsin and MSU only met once in the Big Ten this season due to unbalanced schedules, so this will be relatively new territory for both. Illinois, in the other game, has been winning in logic-defying ways: They narrowly edged Penn State, and bricking free throws like crazy in an OT upset of Purdue. Minnesota got in on a buzzer-beater over Indiana, but haven't beaten the Illini in two meetings this season.

Big 12 Semifinals: #1 Texas vs. #4 Oklahoma and #2 Kansas vs. #6 Texas A&M. The Big 12 has been so predictable over the past few years, with Kansas and Texas playing for the un-needed auto-bid more often than not. Will there be a change this season? Probably not. A&M upset K-State and Michael Beasley yesterday, stating their case for the bubble bid that nobody seems to want. Will it be enough to have gotten here, or do the Aggies need to avoid a blowout in Kansas City?

Big West Final: #5 Cal-Irvine vs. #3 Cal State-Fullerton. It's a well-kept secret that the Big West has some of the best damn team names out there. This one is Anteaters vs. Titans. The Titans haven't made the Big Dance since 1978, and the Eaters, never. I really can't wait to see what Irvine fans dress up as. I'm hoping there are prosthetic tongues.

Conference USA Final: #1 Memphis vs. #7 Tulsa. Snore. Wake me up when this is over, please.

MAC Final: #3 Akron vs. #1 Kent State. Akron hasn't been to the NCAA Tournament since 1986, so they'd no doubt like a picture for the trophy case that doesn't show guys in perms and short-shorts. Kent State swept the Zips this season, and the Flashes are still smarting from last season's final-game loss that kept them out of the postseason. Could there be a repeat?

MEAC Final: #7 Coppin State vs. #1 Morgan State. This will be a fun Pants Party preview no matter how you slice it. Coppin State is led by legendary coach Fang Mitchell, who led the Eagles to a tourney upset of South Carolina in 1997, and Morgan State is lead by Todd Bozeman, who has paid recruits and pitched a hissy about ham sandwiches (after losing to dreadful Longwood, I might add). This will be a good one.

Mountain West Final: #2 UNLV vs. #1 BYU. This one is almost an archetypal battle. There's Sin City against the Mormon Temple, right there for you, baby. Both teams are likely in the tournament, so enjoy this as just a simple basketball game. But with good vs. evil and all that. Are Mormons allowed to storm the floor?

Pac-10 Final: #2 Stanford vs. #1 UCLA. Classic matchup. The Tree will be there, the UCLA cheerleaders will be there, and both teams have talented big men to go to. One thing won't feel quite right, however. John Wooden likely won't be there, as he recovers from a fall in his home a couple of weeks ago. Then again, if he somehow shows up, the place will implode, then explode. Anyway, great game.

Southland Final: #7 Texas-Arlington vs. #5 Northwestern State. This is the Mavericks vs. the Demons, which is another stellar nickname battle. However, with all of the upsets in this lightly-regarded league, I think we're looking at the winner going to Dayton for the play-in game.

SWAC Final: #2 Mississippi Valley State vs. #4 Jackson State. Sadly, JSU ran Chief Kickingstallionsims and the Alabama State Hornets out of the tourney picture. If that's not enough reason to root for MVSU, root for the name Delta Devils.

WAC Final: #4 Boise State vs. #3 New Mexico State. I'm just dying for BSU to get in and end up playing Oklahoma. You know the rest.

Whew. I'm exhausted already, and there hasn't been a single game played. We'll check back in tomorrow to see how all of this turned out and preview the last few finals. Then STF will put together a special Selection Sunday post-mortem in the evening.

It's the most... wonderful time... of the year....

I live in ACC country, and people here are used to hearing six or seven familiar team names called on Selection Sunday. But this year, the conference is top-heavy, with North Carolina and Duke on a level far above challengers Clemson and Miami. With the latter team winning today, those four teams may be all the ACC gets.

The tough neighborhood this season is the Big East, where up to eight teams might make the grade. Nine different squads have held national rankings during the season, and none of the top teams should feel the least bit safe during the post-season tournament. The Quarterfinals are starting to look like Thunderdome, as lower-seeded teams are battling for better NCAA real estate by taking out the regular-season winners. Observe:

West Virginia 78, UConn 72. Consider that statement made. Bob Huggins will lead his alma mater to the NCAA tournament in his first year at the helm, after upsetting a Connecticut team that was ranked No. 15 in the nation. Mountaineer forward Joe Alexander scored a career-high of 34 points, which is just two more than his previous mark, set against this same opponent on March 1. Georgetown is next for WVU.

Pitt 76, Louisville 69 (OT). Sam Young led four Panthers in double figures, putting up 21 points and pulling down 11 rebounds. The winning margin came in overtime, as Pitt outscored the Cardinals 14-7, calmly sinking free throws while Louisville donged three-pointers.

Georgetown 82, Villanova 63. 'Nova's good feelings didn't last long after they eliminated Syracuse from the bubble. I'm sure the Wildcats would have preferred to make a better showing against the Hoyas, even in a loss. In their defense, they did put together a nice run to start the second half before succumbing to Jessie Sapp's career-high 23 point outing.

Marquette 89, Notre Dame 79. 5'8" Mo-reece Acker rolled out of the halftime break with guns blazing, scoring all eleven of his points in the second half. Luke Harangody fouled out, and the Irish were on the ropes. Jerel McNeal put in 28 to lead all scorers.

So, that's the 1, 5,6, and 7 seeds in the semis. I'd call that a balanced conference.

Other Tournament Action

It sounds like someone got a hold of the bubble wrap and is sitting there, deliberately popping the bubbles one by one. A small minority are popping because they aren't needed any more, as their occupants move onto firm bracket ground. The rest evaporate and send teams falling into the abyss. Or, as we like to call it, the NIT. I'm surprised ESPN hasn't cooked up some silly name for this collection of meaningful Quarterfinal games - something like "Clarification Thursday."

ACC Quarterfinal: Miami 63, N.C. State 50. You know what Julius Hodge would say about this N.C. State team? "If you scared, get a dog." Last season Sidney Lowe was able to ride the magic of the Hey Kool-Aid blazer to the brink of an NCAA bid, but this year, that dog don't hunt. Miami simultaneously puts the Wolfpack out of their misery, and cements their first NCAA bid since 2002, when they were a rare first-round victim of the Missouri Tigers.

Pac-10 Quarterfinal: USC 59, Arizona State 55. Reviewing the carnage in other sections of bubble-land, the Sun Devils might still feel OK about their chances. I think everyone feels safer when we can count on Trojans to mount an effective defense, right? Aside from that, O.J. Mayo is coming on strong at the right time, as he scored 23 to lead his team to victory.

C-USA Quarterfinal: Tulsa 78, UAB 68. At one point, UAB was clearly the second-best team in the sprawling Conference USA. Now they look like a punch-drunk boxer who can't find his mouthpiece. After an encouraging five-game win streak, the Blazers ended the season with a 38-point loss at Memphis. And now this disaster. This is not the Tulsa of Tubby Smith or Bill Self, so it seems unlikely that this signals the beginning of a Golden Hurricane run.

Also screwed:
Baylor - lost to Colorado in the first round of the Big 12 Tournament.
Houston - lost to UTEP in C-USA Quarters.
Florida - lost to Alabama in the SEC's first night of tourney play.
Oregon - Got Cougared (and not in the good way) at the Staples Center.
UMass - Good Charlotte makes Minutemen feel Emo in the A-10.
Maryland - Joins Syracuse in the NIT waiting room after choking vs. Boston College.
Ole Miss - Dropped by a Georgia team that managed only four wins in the SEC.
Arizona - Stanford was too much for the Wildcats in the end.
New Mexico - Utah does away with the Pit Monsters in a red-eye special featuring OT.

In with Auto-Bids: Cornell (Ivy), Winthrop (Big South), Belmont (Atlantic Sun), Austin Peay (Ohio Valley), Drake (Missouri Valley), George Mason (CAA), Siena (MAAC), San Diego (WCC), Butler (Horizon), Davidson (SoCon), Oral Roberts (Summit), Western Kentucky (Sun Belt), Mount St. Mary's (NEC), Portland State (Big Sky)

Linkage: If you'd like to discuss Selection Sunday as it happens, the good folks at Bizarro Joe Lunardi will be hosting a live-blog of the televised portion of the show. [Bizarro Joe Lunardi]

The Closer will return this evening with a recap of some of the early action from today, and a preview of tonight's big conference tournament games.

Eric Angevine writes about College Hoops at Storming the Floor and CAAZone. He can be reached at stormingthefloor@gmail.com.

At STF we have a real soft spot for teams that haven't made the NCAA dance before. Especially a school like Sacred Heart, which totally sounds like it could have won the 1942 Championship with a crew-cut whitewash. But alas, the Pioneers have yet to achieve that pinnacle, and after losing to Mount St. Mary's last night, they won't be able to do it again this year. Which is too bad, because we totally get a kick out of seeing SH coach Dave Bike stalking the sidelines looking for all the world like Family Guy's Peter Griffin.

Ah well, we can't have it all this year, I suppose. But we'll always have Fairfield, Connecticut, and that sweet parquet floor.

Wednesday Tournament Results

NEC Final: Mount St. Mary's 68, Sacred Heart 55. MSM star Jeremy Goode had a relatively tame 13 point night, but who-dat Freshman guard Jean Cajou scored 15 to get the Mountaineers into the Big Dance again for the first time since legendary coach Jim Phelan (800+ wins) last escorted them there in 1999. Cajou first scored in double figures in February of this year, and didn't begin to do it consistently until the 21st of that month, which was the last time the Mounties lost a game.

Big Sky Final: Portland State 67-, Northern Arizona 51. Portland State and coach Ken Bone will make their first-ever NCAA tournament appearance this season, which is quite an accomplishment for a school that just reinstated the dormant basketball program 12 years ago. This was an unusual win, as Coach Bone brought star players Scott Morrison and Jeremiah Dominguez off the bench, paving the way for Deonte Huff to lead all scorers with 17 points.

Big East First Round: West Virginia 58, Providence 53. Junior forward Joe Alexander continued his recent hot streak, scoring 22 points to hold off the rampaging Friars of Providence. Over the final 7:00 of regulation, the WVU defense came on strong, limiting Providence to just two field goals during that stretch. The 'Eers move on to face UConn in today's matchup.

Big East First Round: Pitt 70, Cincinnati 64. The other half of the backyard brawl also survived and advanced yesterday, overcoming a 30-point night from Bearcat Deonta Vaughn. Pitt's starting lineup felt at home in the Garden, as three New York-bred Guards scored in double figures to join Sam Young, who had 21.

Pac-10 First Round: Arizona 87, Oregon State 56. The Wildcats took care of business in the first of a couple of games that they need to win to make the Dance. Arizona pounded the Beavers with 59 points in the first half, as interim Head Coach Kevin O'Neill starts auditioning for his next job. Next up: Stanford.

So let's recap: Mount St. Mary's, Ken Bone, Pounded the Beavers. Yep, it's going to be a fun tournament.

The Sun Yet Shines on Philadelphia. Conference tournament wins by St. Joe's, Villanova, and Balls State keep the City of Brotherly love from getting too ugly on Hump Day.

In With Auto-Bids: Cornell (Ivy), Winthrop (Big South), Belmont (Atlantic Sun), Austin Peay (Ohio Valley), Drake (Missouri Valley), George Mason (CAA), Siena (MAAC), San Diego (WCC), Davidson (SoCon), Oral Roberts (Summit), Western Kentucky (Sun Belt), Mount St. Mary's (NEC), Portland State (Big Sky)

I'll be back around 5pm with a Sean Connery-inspired Motivational Platitude from Joe K., as well as previews of the night's best tournament madness matchups.

Eric Angevine writes about college basketball at Storming the Floor and CAAZone. He can be reached at stormingthefloor@gmail.com.

When Oral Roberts beat IUPUI 71-64, they made a lot of people happy. And some of them even went to the school. Our fearless leader has demanded Oral for the Deadspin Pants Party, and he will get it. And this isn't some one-sided affair, either. There is reciprocity. The ORU women's team pounded IUPUI in their conference final, making sure everyone goes home happy tonight.

(Innuendo not sanctioned by Oral Roberts University or by Coach Scott Sutton's Bobblehead)

Conference Tournament Results

Horizon League Final: Butler 70, Cleveland State 55. You've become accustomed to their faces, but did you know that Butler has been getting into the NCAA tournament the hard way recently? For a team that has been dominant on the national scene, the Bulldogs seem to have a difficult time with the Horizon tournament, having to resort to the at-large bid for the past two years. They almost did it again this year, blowing a 14-point first-half lead before they decided to get busy livin'. Mike Green was a force for Butler, scoring 24 points and snatching 13 rebounds.

Sun Belt Final: Western Kentucky 67, Middle Tennessee State 57. We're going to forgive Western Kentucky for having a mascot that looks like the illegitimate offspring of McDonalds' Grimace. Pundits have been eagerly awaiting the arrival of star Guard/Forward Courtney Lee on the national airwaves for some time. C-Lee did score 13, but it was Sophomore big man Jeremy Evans who put on a show, scoring 20 and hauling down 14 to lead the towel-waving Hilltoppers to the Big Dance.

Big Sky Semis: Northern Arizona 75, Weber State 70. Lumberjack Kyle Landry was the only Northern Arizonaman to score in double figures, but with nine other players scoring in the contest, you could say he got by with a little help from his friends.

Big Sky Semis: Portland State 72, Idaho State 61. The Bengals circled PSU big man Scott Morrison, holding him to one point and two rebounds for the evening, but the Viking guards turned them to butter with a barrage of three pointers.

Other Scores

MEAC First Round: Coppin State 55, Howard 54.
South Carolina State 78-Bethune-Cookman 69.
WAC First Round: San Jose State 64-Louisiana Tech 62.

In the Tournament

Cornell (Ivy), Winthrop (Big South), Belmont (Atlantic Sun), Austin Peay (Ohio Valley), Drake (Missouri Valley), George Mason (CAA), Siena (MAAC), San Diego (WCC), Davidson (SoCon), Oral Roberts (Summit), Western Kentucky (Sun Belt)

On the line tomorrow: NEC Championship. Previews of tonight's games, and a Motivational Platitude from Gourmet Spud, in the evening edition of the Closer.

Eric Angevine writes about college basketball at Storming the Floor and CAAZone. He can be reached at stormingthefloor@gmail.com.

You probably already know that the motto of this site is "Sports News without Access, Favor, or Discretion." This credo is generally understood to mean that the site will look at sports from the viewpoint of a fan, rather than that of a jaded VIP. I tacitly accepted that motto as my own when I signed on to write for Will. But today I must confess: I still have no favor or discretion, but I did have, briefly, Access.

Attending the CAA Tournament with the CAAZone crew, I was given a media pass that would allow me to interview athletes, wander around the locker rooms, and eat free pretzels from the press buffet. In practical terms, this offered the following advantages:

• Listening to a TV announcer complain about how sick he is of basketball. While standing at a urinal.
• Seeing VCU players give sincere bro-hugs to William & Mary players despite being knocked out of the tournament and onto the bubble by those same men.
• Watching John Feinstein eat pretzels.
• Watching Dan Steinberg eat pretzels.
• Realizing that Washington Post writers love free pretzels just as much as I do.
• Having a damn fine view of the various dance teams from the "blogger ghetto" section of press row.
• Did I mention the free pretzels?

So, I hope you can forgive me this breach of Deadspin etiquette. Because really, if you think about it, all I did was eat free food, watch basketball and ogle cheerleaders. And then I wrote about it. Any one of you would do the same. (Ed. Note: Not all of us.) I promise, I'll never do it again. Unless we're talking Pac-10 cheerleaders. Because you-all are nice, but damn.

Championship Week Recap: Monday Night

WCC Final: San Diego 69, Gonzaga 62. Playing at home in the Jenny Craig Pavilion, the San Diego Toreros overcame an early deficit to beat Gonzaga to win the auto-bid, just one day after also knocking St. Mary's out of the semifinals. Their second-half run was keyed by 15 points from Rob Jones, grandson of Jonestown leader Jim Jones. What the hell is this, a Michael Chabon novel?

SoCon Final: Davidson 65, Elon 49. Sorry, folks. No Elon-gate. But then again, they probably angered the lord by changing their name from Fighting Christians anyway. With Davison and Curry safely in the NCAA tournament, we're all going to have to find some other potential bubble team to argue about. I'm guessing one of the above WCC tournament dropouts will do very nicely.

MAAC Final: Siena 74, Rider 53. Go Tay, it's your birfday, gonna party like it's your birfday. Siena's Tay Fisher dropped 21 points on his 22nd birthday to propel the #1 seed Siena Saints to a big win over the Rider Broncs. Rider forward Jason Thompson put up 22 points and 12 rebounds in the losing effort. Thompson is said to be NBA-ready, but he may have to make a detour to the NIT first.

CAA Final: George Mason 68, William & Mary 59. Guess who's coming to dinner? Folarin Campbell and Will Thomas, that's who. You may remember them from their roles as Final Four participants in 2006. The tournament-tested veterans made damn sure the William & Mary Tribe didn't add a fourth miracle-shot finish to their repertoire by knocking down every shot they took with ruthless precision. Oh, and that's a sliver of their dance team at the top of the page, too. Hubba hubba.

Summit League Semis: Oral Roberts 58, Indiana-Purdue Fort Wayne 42. This one was like the Snopes Monkey Trial all over again. As a strict interpreter of the Bible, I'm assuming Brother Oral doesn't even believe in Mastodons, so his team's quest to eradicate them from the Summit League tournament takes on some serious social overtones. The Golden Eagles advance to face...

Summit League Semis: IUPUI 80, Oakland 65. Just when you thought we had run out of Indiana/Purdue hybrid teams, here comes another one. In 2005, Oakland made the NCAA tournament with a 12-18 record, so I guess, all things considered, we should thank the Jaguars for making sure a 20-win team will come out of the Summit. You may remember that IUPUI's coach took to the sidelines barefoot earlier this season to raise money for charity. Jaguars ace George Hill had 32 points in the win.

Sun Belt Semis: Western Kentucky 70, Arkansas-Little Rock 50. Western Kentucky got Courtney Lee (20.9 ppg) into the final. Too bad they won't be facing...

Sun Belt Semis: Middle Tennessee State 82, South Alabama 73. Mid-major-heads were really rooting for the WKU/USA final. Ain't gonna happen, so we get to debate the Jaguars' place on the bubble as well. Ain't no flies on MTSU, however. Four players finished in double figures.

Cornell (Ivy), Winthrop (Big South), Belmont (Atlantic Sun), Austin Peay (Ohio Valley), Drake (Missouri Valley), George Mason (CAA), Siena (MAAC), San Diego (WCC), Davidson (SoCon)

Tune in this afternoon for a preview of another night full of conference tourney action.

Eric Angevine writes about college basketball at Storming the Floor and CAAZone. He can be reached at stormingthefloor@gmail.com.

They Are Who We Thought They Were

• Michael Beasley, Kansas State: A beast without remorse from wire to wire. Beasley's 26 double-doubles smashed the freshman record set by Syracuse's Carmelo Anthony.
• Eric Gordon, Indiana: Only failed to score in double figures in two games, due to injury. Succeeded despite scandal-marred ousting of his head coach.
• Kevin Love, UCLA: Doubled up on points in ever contest his team played, and threw in nineteen double-digit rebounding performances to boot. Succeeded despite dubious facial hair.
• Derrick Rose, Memphis: Led his team to a 30-1 season and showed no signs of jitters as a newbie floor general. While not relied on to score every night, he averaged 4.5 assists per game, dropping 12 on Austin Peay and 11 on UAB in the final game of the Tigers' regular season.
• Jonny Flynn, Syracuse: As his teammates dropped like one-dimensional characters in a World War II movie, Flynn stayed steady. A capable scorer, it was his skill as a setup man that astounded. A campus legend from the moment he set foot on the private campus, Flynn has earned his accolades during a tough season.
• Honorable Mention: O.J. Mayo (USC), Jerryd Bayless (Arizona).

Hitting the Wall

• Patrick Mills, St. Mary's: The indigenous Australian dazzled insomniacs in the first meeting with Gonzaga, going full-bore all game long and hitting circus shots to keep his team in the lead. Looked mortal later in the season in a loss to Kent State, followed by a two-point ousting against rival San Diego.
• Patrick Patterson, Kentucky: He didn't really hit the wall so much as develop a stress fracture, but the promise of his rookie season is destined to remain undelivered.
• Andrew Ogilvy, Vanderbilt: Another Aussie who may have been worn down by playing away from home for a full year. Ogilvy was putting up 20 point games regularly in the early season, but tends to have off nights in conference play, such as his four points vs. then-No. 1 Tennessee.
• DeAndre Jordan, Texas A&M: Much like his team, the seven-footer looks great for stretches, then mediocre. The Aggies have been shellacked a few times this season, and Jordan was mostly AWOL for every one.
• Robbie Hummel, Purdue: It kind of pains me to put Hummel here, because he was such a pleasant surprise for the Boilermakers. But the numbers don't lie - Hummel is not consistent in any category. Yet.
• Honorable (?) Mention: Kyle Singler (Duke), Kosta Koufos (Ohio State)

Hidden Under a Bushel

• James Harden, Arizona State: A little buzz has started to surround Harden as his team has clawed and fought to stay on the NCAA bubble, but for the most part, he has been overshadowed by Love, Mayo, and Bayless in the Pac-10.
• Manny Harris, Michigan: Putting in good work on a bad team. His sweet all-around game has been obscured as the Wolverines struggled to adapt to a new system, but with a little help next year, watch out for Manny.
• Chris Warren, Ole Miss: Another guy who is just as happy to give the ball away to a hot-shooting teammate as he is to keep it for himself. His name recognition has tumbled due to his team's inconsistency.
• Jeff Teague, Wake Forest: Actually got stronger as the season went on, finding his place on a team that was reeling from the loss of coach Skip Prosser. Finished the season with three straight 20+ point games.
• Nick Calathes, Florida: This Baby Gator seems to have the skills to work within Billy Donovan's system, and even kind of resembles his head coach. Could blossom next year when the team grows up a bit.
• Honorable Mention: Matt Howard (Butler), Blake Griffin (Oklahoma)

I couldn't find a category that made sense for Alex Legion. Should he ever complete a season, I'll let you know. (Ed. Note: Next year, baby!)

Top 25 Action

North Carolina 76-Duke 68. They've split the season series; will they meet Sunday?
UCLA 81-Cal 80. Unusual wins are still wins. I'm sure they'd prefer blowouts.
Memphis 94-UAB 56. Tigers crush their nearest C-USA rival. Tournament should blow.
Tennessee 89-South Carolina 56. Pearl says goodbye to Odom the only way he knows.
Kansas 72-Texas A&M 55. Jayhawks very good at dominating in boring fashion.
Stanford 64-USC 77. Mayo's year not as planned. Will he stay?
Wisconsin 65-Northwestern 52. Badgers take Big Ten one week after I gave it to them.
Texas 62-Okie State 57. Sharing a Big 12 title is like kissing Bevo.
G'Town 55-Louisville 52. Hoyas rolling back to the Final Four?
Xavier 86-Richmond 61. Musketeers take of shoes and kill Spiders.
Butler 66-Illinois-Chicago 50. Bulldogs had the Green light.
UConn 96-Cincy 51. No Bearcats broke the double-digit barrier in this game.
Purdue 72-Michigan 58. UM fans made a Belein for the exits.
Vanderbilt 73-Alabama 78. Riley romps in OT.
Notre Dame 67-USF 60. Irish have outfits all picked out for St. Patty's Day.
Indiana 64-Penn State 68. Gosh, if he keeps winning, will JoePa ever retire?
Michigan State 54-Ohio State 63. Jamar Butler deserves a Buckeye sticker.
Drake 79-Illinois State 49. Bulldogs go dancing, Redbirds not damn likely.
Gonzaga 52-Santa Clara 48. Zags in WCC final, awaiting St. Mary's?
Marquette 72-Syracuse 87. Orange are Marycuse's better half this weekend.
Washington State 76-Washington 73. Cougs need 2OT to quash the purple.
BYU 61-TCU 54. Verily dids't Brigham Young win. And there was much rejoicing.
Mississippi State 84-LSU 75. Charles Rhodes racks up another double-double.

The Judges Will Allow It Just This Once

William & Mary students threw down the barriers that caged them and stormed merrily onto the floor at the Richmond Coliseum on Sunday. Problem is, their team hasn't won an NCAA bid, yet. However, in ending an epic streak of CAA futility by defeating No. 1 seed VCU to make the final game, the Tribe may have earned this moment of joy. We still feel that the basketball gods may punish them with a loss to tourney-savvy George Mason tonight, but we're not laying odds on it.

Tonight's Big Games

Davidson (25-6) vs. Elon (14-18): Southern Conference Championship.

William & Mary (17-15) vs. George Mason (22-10): Colonial Athletic Association Championship.

Gonzaga (25-6) vs. San Diego (20-13).: West Coast Conference Championship.

Siena (21-10) vs. Rider (23-9): Metro Atlantic Athletic Conference Championship.

In The Dance: Cornell (Ivy), Winthrop (Big South), Belmont (Atlantic Sun), Austin Peay (Ohio Valley), Drake (Missouri Valley).

Eric Angevine writes about college basketball at Storming the Floor and CAAZone. He can be reached at stormingthefloor@gmail.com.

As basketball fans watch the bubble report every season, two names seem to come up with alarming frequency: the Maryland Terrapins and the Syracuse Orange. As we were batting those names around over at STF, we came up with the radical theory that perhaps the difference between the two teams is razor-thin. In fact, they are living parallel lives.

Witness:

• Large eastern state schools with a basketball-first mentality (granted, this may not be completely by choice)
• Each program is run by an old-school coach with a persecution complex
• Both Boeheim and Williams are coaching at their alma maters
• Maryland won the NCAA title in 2002, Syracuse the very next season
• The Terrapins experienced a decline in returns, missing the tournament in 2005 and 2006. The Orange missed out in 2007 and are likely to do the same this year
• Maryland no longer plays in Cole Field House. Syracuse no longer runs plays for Derrick Coleman

The evidence speaks for itself. Perhaps Gary Williams sweats so much because he is, in fact, Jim Boeheim in a Gary Williams suit.

It rubs the lotion on its skin or it gets the hose again.

Mom Always Did Like Pat Best. St. Josephs 71-Xavier 66. Maybe all that talk of a Philly curse was premature. I'm not going to say Xavier tanked, but they have already locked up the at-large bid from the A-10, and found plenty of minutes for bench players on this road trip. Nonetheless, this is a huge win for St. Joe's profile, and it helped them close Alumni Fieldhouse in truly memorable fashion. Pat Calathes had a fine Senior Night, going for 17 points, 8 rebounds, and 2 steals in 39 minutes. And one last sweet floor-storming.

Meanwhile, In the Maritime Provinces... Providence 85-UConn 76. Friars... Huskies... Dunkin Donuts Center.... Too many jokes, head exploding!!!!! Seriously, though. Big, bad UConn got Efejuku'd last night, as the Providence Guard poured in 25 points to keep his team within farting distance of the bubble. Still, it's not really jake to storm the floor when you just ran your record to 15-14, unless you beat a top-5 team. So let it be written, so let it be (not) done.

Lord, I'm not Asking for Much. Just Big Kenny vs. Duke in the Dance. UNC-Asheville 75-Liberty 57. Big Kenny George's knees were good for 24 minutes, 19 points, and 11 rebounds. The 7'7" Junior didn't get any of his signature blocks, which was probably a result of (or proximate cause of) the Flames taking 30 three-point shots and making only nine of them. The Bulldogs set up a home-floor rematch with Winthrop for the Big South title and a shot at the Big Dance.

Tournament Bids decided this weekend:

March 8
• Ohio Valley: There's a 75% chance that a team from Tennessee gets in.
• Big South: 2-seed Winthrop plays #1 Asheville on Bulldogs home court.
• Atlantic Sun: Belmont is the favorite, but Gardner-Webb is still pulling upsets.

March 9
• Missouri Valley: Respek for Arch Madness in St. Louis. Drake is #1 seed.
• America East: Retrievers, Great Danes, Terriers... who will be Best in Show?

Top 25 Action:

Saturday

• Louisville (24-6) at Georgetown (24-4). A great deal of Big East marbles hang in the balance. Louisville's Padgett has either been dominant (20+ points in wins over Notre Dame and Pitt) or schlominant (single digits in wins over Syracuse and 'Nova). Which guy shows up to do battle with Roy Hibbert?

• North Carolina (28-2) at Duke (26-3) .Yawn - Apparently this is supposed to be some big deal. Like, Coach K won his 800th game or something? But he, like, has to still play this Roy Williams guy, OK? Like maybe even twice? But anyhow, this game is going to be on television. As if.

Sunday

• Florida (21-9) at Kentucky (17-11). The ultimate in bubble warfare. Two-time defending champs vs. All-time wins leader. The prize? A shot at a middle-low seed and a possible first-round exit. Man, times be changin'. Patrick Patterson's stress fracture complicates this one for the 'Cats.

• Virginia Tech (18-11) at Clemson (21-8). Clemson is shopping for bracket position with a skylight and a nice view of the ocean. Virginia Tech will take a garden-level efficiency, and thank you for it. Aside from that, both teams are currently 9-6 in the ACC, so this could have tournament seed implications as well.

I'll be at the CAA tournament in Richmond starting today and running through the Championship game on Monday. If you're so inclined, you can follow the action through the auspices of the fantastic CAAZone, where they'll be hosting chats, live-blogs, video streaming, and more.

Eric Angevine writes about college basketball in a few different places, usually with a minimum of embarrassing factual, logical, and grammatical errors. He can be reached at stormingthefloor@gmail.com.

The ups and downs of this season have been tough on the Baylor Bears. When the Big 12 season began, they were riding high at 12-2, having only lost to then-No. 6 Washington State and Arkansas. The conference slate was going their way as well - they even won an epic 5 OT game against Texas A&M. But after that, things began to fall apart. The Bears lost seven of their next eight to fall below .500 in the conference and needed a recent three-game win streak to climb back onto the NCAA tourney bubble. It's the kind of thing that can drive a fan wild, until you realize that this is the best thing that's happened to them in a long, long time.

Baylor has actually won two NCAA titles - one in men's tennis, and one in women's basketball. But in marquee sports like basketball and football, they fall woefully short time and time again. Hoops-wise, they went 477-651 in the old Southwest Conference. When that league went belly-up, they joined the newly-formed Big 12 and rolled up a putrid .256 win percentage prior to this season. Throw in the odd teammate-on-teammate murder and coaching coverup, and you've got yourself a pretty damn sad representative of your church-sponsored University. It's almost enough to make a feller cuss and drink beer.

The Bears have made the tournament four times in their history, with three of them coming before the Eisenhower administration. The most recent was in 1988, when they lost to a Memphis team that never made it out of the round of 32. But this year's team has 20 wins, talent, and a cornball optimist for a head coach in Scott Drew (of the Valparaiso Drews). Even after losing to A&M at home last night, Baylor has a good chance to go from scandal-rocked outcast two years ago to the postseason. Ask St. Bonaventure how easy that is to do.

Shan, come back! Shan!!! Vanderbilt 86- Mississippi State 85 (OT). Well, that's one way to neutralize Varnado's shot-blocking skills. Shan Foster (42 points) was a blazing 9-15 from the three-point line in this one, including the winning points with .01 left on the clock in OT. Even more amazingly, the Commodores were a perfect 11-11 from the free-throw line as well, though only four Vandys total made it to the stripe.

NIT One, Pearl Two. Tennessee 89- Florida 86. OK, I'm going to go ahead and move the Volunteers into "lock" status for this season. Ha, whew, that joke never gets old. JaJuan Smith was so busy scoring (23 pts) that Forward Tyler Smith ended up leading the team in assists. Florida's Nick Calathes led all scorers with 24 points, and all assisters with 9, but it was not enough to keep the Gators on top all game long.

A Tale of Two Halves. Miami (FL) 74-Boston College 61. After scoring just 20 points in the first half, Frank Haith's Hurricanes found the Eye of the Tiger and damn near tripled that in the second stanza, putting up 54 to inch a little bit higher on the bubble.

Minute Made Men. UMass 100-LaSalle 63. This might be the one that puts the Minutemen in the driver's seat for the second bid in the Atlantic XIV. Each UMass starter scored in double figures, and the bench put in the remaining ten points to lay an even C on Balls State.

Fair To Middlin'. Oklahoma 67-Oklahoma State 56. These two teams sit smack in the middle of the Big 12 geographically and record-wise. The Sooners reached the 20-win plateau despite a season full of injuries, and might be able to eke into the big dance if they can put together a run in Kansas City.

Tonight's Big Game

Stanford (24-4) at UCLA (26-3). Through a quirk of scheduling, it's been more than two full months since the last time these teams played, a 76-67 Bruin victory. If the Cardinal can somehow pull off a win at Pauley, these two teams will end the evening tied atop the Pac-10.

Eric Angevine writes about college basketball for Storming the Floor and CAAZone. He can be reached at stormingthefloor@gmail.com.

Philadelphia sports fans are very used to failure at this point. Going 25 years between championships tends to do that to a fan. Still, the college basketball scene in the City of Brotherly Love, home to the historic Big 5, has managed to remain somewhat successful over the years. While none of five have reached the Final Four since Nova's miracle run in 1985 (Historians claim this to be the last remnant of a championship to reach the greater Philadelphia area), Saint Joseph's, Nova and Temple have all reached the Elite Eight in the past decade.

But it looks as if the curse of William Penn may have finally struck the college hoops scene, as Philly may be shut out of the NCAA Tournament for the first time since 1977. As of today, Saint Joseph's, Villanova and Temple all appear to be on the wrong side of the bubble, and recent tourney staple Penn has been eliminated from the Ivy race, swept by long-dormant Cornell.

Barring finals runs in the Big East tournament by Nova and Atlantic 10 tournament by SJU and Temple, it looks like Philly soul will be left out of the dance for the first time in 30 years. Which is going to make for a very dull March, even if someone busts out Green Man.

And let's not even talk about Balls State.

Shakespeare Couldn't Have Written a Better Ending. Ohio State 80-Purdue 77. Wow. Really bad night for Purdue in Columbus. Kramer and Hummel combined to shoot 1-8 from behind the arc, and tallied only 11 points. The only positive that came out of this game was that freshmen E'Twaun Moore and Scott Martin picked up the scoring load, which could come in handy come tournament time. Ohio State's Othello Hunter (56% from the stripe over the course of the season) hit the clutch freebies in OT to keep bubble hope alive for the Buckeyes.

The Objective is to Get OFF the Bubble... Ole Miss 81-Arkansas 72. I can't remember another year in which so many gut-check games were frittered away in the last two weeks of the season. Arkansas was in excellent position to climb permanently into the brackets after beating Vanderbilt, then they drop this stinker in Oxford to a previously flailing Ole Miss team. Rebs Center Dwayne Curtis went for 23 and 11.

We're Too Tired to Eat the Free Tacos. Tennessee-Martin 101-Samford 94 (3OT). Lester Hudson, a scoring phenom who may or may not understand long division, lived to fight another day after this Ohio Valley tournament slugfest.

Shoulda Made A Left Turn at Albuquerque. New Mexico 59-UNLV 45. J.R. Giddens had some 'splodin' to do, and he concussed all over Lon Kruger's Runnin' Rebs. The Kansas transfer had 17 points, 15 rebounds, and 5 assists as he moved his team within a whisker of second place in the Mountain West.

The NIT Has Become So Commercial. In other news, if you're just dying to watch some third-rate basketball in March, you're in luck. Fox Sports Net has announced that they will be carrying the inaugural College Basketball Invitational, otherwise known as "Sixteen teams so bad they didn't even make the NIT." I can't wait to see Frank Caliendo planted in the audience at the Grambling State-Florida International game.

Tonight's Big Game

Mississippi State (20-8) at Vanderbilt (24-5). This game features one of my favorite players from this season - Jarvis Varnado. The Bulldog sophomore has put up the blue-collar points/rebounds/blocks triple-double once this season, and is always a threat to double an opponent up in any of those three categories. That said, this game is played in ultra-funky Memorial Gym, where Tennessee lost the No. 1 ranking just about one week ago.

My wife dragged me to see Cirque du Soliel this weekend, so maybe I'm still a little confused by the fact that I actually kind of liked it. But is it wise for Brook Lopez to say what he's really thinking while talking to Sports Illustrated?

In a recent Pop Culture Grid segment, the clean-cut and more offensively polished Lopez brother spilled his guts, confessing that his favorite HBO series was Sex and the City, and comparing himself to a lazy cartoon bear. In addition, when asked which singer he'd most like to be a roadie for, Lopez came up with.... Michael Jackson. I'm not going to delve into the subtext of that choice, other than to say that he redeemed himself pretty well by also choosing Jessica Simpson as his Ultimate Red Carpet Date.

Still... the combined admiration for Carrie Bradshaw and Jacko paints a disturbing self-portrait.

Y'all Should See What We Do in the Front Yard. West Virginia 76-Pitt 62. Tonight, Bob Huggins wore some kind of giant flower in his lapel, continuing his bid to be the most unusually dressed coach in the Big East. Something must have been pollinated correctly, because the Mountaineers rolled to victory in a very loud Coliseum. Junior Forward Joe Alexander had by far his best game of the season, putting up 32 points and taking down 10 rebounds to move WVU to a slightly classier section of the bubble, without so many rusted-out cars and abandoned refrigerators.

Hey, Pops. Why Don't You Have a Seat? Kansas109 - Texas Tech 51. In the service of irony, I should mention that tonight was KU's Senior Night. But this beatdown got out of hand so fast that Kansas' walk-ons and freshmen got more PT than they've had all season long. Jayhawk frosh Cole Aldridge (11 points, 11 rebounds) gave Kansas fans a glimpse of the future with his first collegiate double-double. The guy from Knight School got on the floor for Texas Tech, but seemed to be blissfully unaware that the team was running offensive and defensive plays that he was expected to participate in.

Tonight's Big Games

Before I get to the big game, I need to show you the WTF? Game of the Night. Apparently, the Marquette Golden Eagles feel they've had enough of that pesky Big East race for now, because they've scheduled 10-20 Florida Gulf Coast as their sparring partner for this evening. The A-Sun tournament starts tonight, but FGC is a provisional member and not eligible this season. Try not to strain anything there, fellas.

Now for the good stuff, or as close as we can get right now:

Purdue (23-6) at Ohio State (17-12). I'm only mentioning this game because some people continue to insist that the Buckeyes have a shot to return to el tournamente grande. Reality says that both of last season's dance marathon finalists are suffering the big-time hangover this time around. Call me next year when Kosta Koufous is a little more polished.

Arkansas (19-9) at Mississippi (19-9). I know which kind of 19-9 I'd rather be. Arkansas has an 8-6 SEC record, including a fresh win at Vanderbilt. Ole Miss is 5-9, featuring bad losses to LSU and South Carolina, as well as a season sweep at the hands of Auburn. This is why they always tell us not to get excited until the conference season starts...

Eric Angevine writes about college basketball for Storming the Floor and CAAZone. He can be reached at stormingthefloor@gmail.com.

Like a lot of people (none of them UNC fans), I feel kind of ambivalent about Coach K getting his 800th victory with the close win over North Carolina State this weekend. In reality, the only thing I can really accuse him of is being smug and humorless (unless you find that "leader who just happens to be a coach" line as hilarious as I do), and extremely damned efficient.

Krzyzewski's story is tough to beat. He's a first-generation American, son of Polish immigrants, born in Chicago. If that guy goes on to coach, say, Oregon, and wins his 800th there, we probably throw him a party and film soft-focus documentaries about the American Dream. But instead, after picking up his first 73 wins at Army, Coach K. burrowed into the soft, warm underbelly of Duke University, in the heart of ACC country where the folks really know how to hate. And he won enough important games outside of Tobacco Road to make many of the rest of us a mite irritated with him and his peevish collection of blue-blood players as well.

But honestly, that's about all we can say about him. He built a machine, and operated it efficiently. At his current rate of 30 wins per season, he should pass his mentor, Bobby Knight (902 wins), sometime in the next four years. Only 61 years old, Krzyzewski could easily set the new mark for coaching excellence at 1,000+ wins. He might not be our favorite coach, but it could be a lot worse. What if Eddie Sutton still had a shot at the top mark?

I'm still going to stop short of the congratulatory handshake, though.

Top 25

• Tennessee 63-Kentucky 60. 3 point L @ TN > 40 point L @ Vandy. Still sucks.
• North Carolina 90-Boston College 80. 3 players in double figs > 1 with 46.
• Memphis 76-Southern Miss. 67. Here's a shocker. Memphis takes C-USA title.
• UCLA 68-Arizona 66. Close but no cigar. Story of the Wildcats' season thus far.
• Texas 80-Texas Tech 83. Hmm.. we might have to start taking this Knight guy seriously.
• Duke 87-NC State 86. A squeaker for Coach K's 800th victory.
• Kansas 88-K-State 74. So, does Beasley still want to "beat them in Africa?"
• Stanford 60-Washington State 53. Lopez brothers reject Cougars' advances.
• Indiana 74-Michigan State 103. Never underestimate the Spartans on Senior Night.
• Georgetown 70-Marquette 68. JT3 rallies the troops with Kenny Rogers lyrics?
• Notre Dame 98-DePaul 91. Irish assailed by Demons, Dana Jacobsen. Win anyway.
• Xavier 66-George Washington 56. Three Musketeers shared the scoring for 11th straight.
• Butler 65-Detroit 31. Bulldogs' Mike Green ended one assist away from a triple-double.
• Vanderbilt 73-Arkansas 78. This helps Razorbacks more than 'Bama loss hurt them.
• UConn 79-WVU 71. With Pitt and WVU at 9-7, Monday's Backyard Brawl means a lot.
• Purdue 68-Northwestern 43. Seems I was talking out of my ass, Big Ten not yet clinched.
• Louisville 68-Villanova 54. Cardinals are developing Seinfeldian "hand" in the Big East.
• Drake 73-Wichita State 63. Bulldogs unwilling to submit to Shockers.
• Gonzaga 88-St. Mary's 76. Samhan's injury may be limiting his effectiveness for SMC.
• Kent State 83-Bowling Green 89. Well, I'll be damned. Must be Sussman's birthday.
• BYU 76-Air Force 57. Apologies to Mich. St. BYU is now the team I have nothing to say about.

• 
  Tonight's Big Game

  Pitt (21-8) at West Virginia (20-9). Both teams are now 9-7 in the Big East, and both are considered bubble teams. Some say Pitt is already in, so the onus is on the home team to make their case and simultaneously throw some doubt on a hated rival. To borrow one of the best blog names ever: We Must Ignite this Couch! (sad story, incidentally).

  Eric Angevine writes about college basketball for Storming the Floor and CAAZone. He can be reached at stormingthefloor@gmail.com.

So enjoy it this time, people. Come tournament time, a good lot of these games' final minutes will make the airline delays look manageable.

(Video from Awful Announcing)

Shoulda Been You, Skip Prosser. Mike Krzyzewski guided Duke to an 87-86 victory over NC State, giving him his 800th career victory. He's 102 shy of his mentor Bob Knight on the career wins list, and therefore must resist the urge to use steroids, which in this case is hair coloring Seriously, media. That's why he looks young. No bald spot, coupled with putting the Just For Men CEO's kids through medical school.

Ick. While I'm happy for Morgan State, their MEAC-clinching win over Delaware State had the final score of 39-36. The halftime score was 22-13. Only one guy on either team had double-figure points. Comatose patients who were listening to this game on the radio sank further into comas.

Even if you like conference tournaments as much as I do, this might still seem a little early to be talking about March Madness. But seriously, think about it; if this weren't one of those random leap years, it would be March right now, right? But the main reason we're going to talk tournament today is because we might very well have our first NCAA tournament entrant by the time we head off to bed tonight.

Now, as Deadspin readers, I know you're probably already aware that the Ivy League doesn't have a tournament, but rather gives their auto-bid to the regular-season champ. And you probably also know that Cornell has powered through the genius league with a perfect 10-0 mark, and a pretty stellar 18-5 overall record. The numbers are simple enough that even this public-school grad can understand them: Brown, the closest challenger to Cornell, has three losses. It was swept by Cornell, and there are four games left in the Ivy season. Ergo (Get a load of me! I said Ergo!), if the Teddy Bears knock off Dartmouth (9-15) tonight, they get the first bid.

Let's look at the Big Red via the incisive medium of bullet-points:

• Cornell hasn't lost since January 6th, at Duke. That's a twelve-game winning streak.
• The Big Red lost four road games: at Ohio, Bucknell, Syracuse, and Duke. Then there was the mystifying loss at home to Colgate. Honestly, ask the average American, and they'd probably be surprised to find out Colgate and Cornell were different schools.
• Their win streak includes the requisite victory over NJIT, in Newark. The Highlanders scored less than any other team that played Cornell this season. Their 33 was even less than the 46 put up by non-DI visitor Alvernia College.
• Cornell is led by 6'6" Ryan Wittman (15 ppg) and 5'11" Louis Dale (12.7 ppg), but it also sports a legit seven-footer in the person of Jeff Foote, a senior transfer from St. Bonaventure. I hear he can weld the hell out of anything you got.
• The last time Cornell made the Big Dance was in 1988, as a 16 seed. It was blown out 90-50 by Arizona, which eventually made the Final Four.
• Cornell is the Big Red. Dartmouth is the Big Green. It's going to be like Christmas all up in here.

Sadly, there will be no national television coverage of this event.

[The Cornell Basketball Blog]

• Louisville 90-Notre Dame 85. Harangody had 40 points and 12 rebounds, but the Cardinals put the kibosh on Kyle McAlarney to earn the win, holding the superb shooter to 3-of-14 shooting on the night, and just 1-8 from his beloved three-point line. Bizarrely enough, Harangody himself hit for 75% from behind the arc. David Padgett paced the home team with 26 points. Louisville is now tied with Georgetown atop the Big East, and the Irish fall 1 ½ games back.

• Wisconsin 57-Michigan State 42. Goran Suton went for 14 and 15, but his Spartans fell in Madison, allowing Wisconsin to claim a share of the Big Ten regular-season title.

• Butler 66-Wright State 61. This win officially gives the Horizon's #1 seed to Butler, which means that, barring an early exit by the Bulldogs, the road to the NCAA auto-bid goes through Hinkle.

• USC 70-Arizona 58. Here comes that crazy Strength of Schedule debate again. The Wildcats played everybody, but didn't beat enough of them. So does that make them a good team for the NCAA's, or does it prove that they can't handle the competition? On the other hand, maybe the Arizona football team should sign that kid who winged the water bottle at Tim Floyd.

The Weekender

Tonight

• Dartmouth (9-15) at Cornell (18-5). I'm going to have to preview the hell out of Cornell until March 8th, when the next bids go out.

• Niagara (18-8) at Siena (17-10). The winner of this game gets to break the three-team 11-5 logjam in the MAAC standings and join Loyola (MD) at the top of the heap.

Saturday

• Georgetown (23-4) at Marquette (21-6). If Marquette wins this home game, Louisville sits alone atop the Big East. I'm going to let that sink in for a minute...

• Washington State (21-6) at Stanford (22-4). Both teams are in, so this is for seeding.

• St. Mary's (24-4) at Gonzaga (22-6). Winner takes top seed in the WCC tournament.

• Kansas State (18-9) at Kansas (25-3). Take these last few chances to watch Michael Beasley and Brandon Rush, friends. You owe it to yourself.

Sunday

• Kentucky (16-10) at Tennessee (25-3). Will this be another 40-point thrashing for the Wildcats, or will they finally stamp their ticket to ride?

• Indiana (24-4) at Michigan State (22-6). Wisconsin has claimed their share of the Big Ten title, will Indiana make them slice that pie?

• UCLA (24-3) at Arizona (17-11). Want to hit Ben Howland with a water bottle? Go ahead, punk, make his day.

Eric Angevine writes about College Basketball for Storming the Floor and CAAZone. He can be reached at stormingthefloor@gmail.com.

So, ESPN The Magazine has released their list of Academic All-Americans, and it looks something like this:

First Team
• D.J. Augustin, Texas, 3.64, Education
• Adam Emmenecker, Drake, 3.97, Business and Finance
• Justin Hare, Belmont, 3.87, Exercise Science (Pre-Medicine)
• Jack Leasure, Coastal Carolina, 3.82, History
• Brett Winkelman, North Dakota State, 3.84, Industrial Engineering and Management

Second Team
• A.J. Graves, Butler, 3.35, Actuarial Science
• Bryan Mullins, Southern Illinois, 4.0, Finance
• Drew Neitzel, Michigan State, 3.27, Interdisciplinary Humanities
• Joe Reitz, Western Michigan, 3.72, Finance
• Mike Schachtner, Wisconsin-Green Bay, 3.81, Psychology

Third Team
• Ryan Bright, Sam Houston State, 3.59, Kinesiology
• Matt Nelson, Boise State, 3.52, Business
• Greg Paulus, Duke, 3.30, Political Science
• Alex Ruoff, West Virginia, 3.79, History
• Drew Streicher, Butler, 3.95, Chemistry (MBA)

• Academic All-American of the Year: Adam Emmenecker, Drake

QUITE FRANKLY, the logic escapes me. Bryan Mullins ended up on the second team after getting a 4.0! Are they factoring in Strength of Schedule and RPI? Wins and Losses? U.S. News & World Report College Guide ratings?

And Neitzel... c'mon. We all studied Interdisciplinary Humanities. Pick a major, big fella, Emmenecker's got four, fer chrissakes. Borrow one of his.

Speaking of Emmenecker, at STF we started wondering how he finds time to excel in the classroom while also starring on the hoops team, and we have a theory. Either he studies while using the restroom, or he's given up going to the restroom all together. Which would really explain the urgency in his game. We were also scandalized at the lost .03 in his GPA. Sounds like somebody tried the old "The Bulldog ate my homework" excuse one too many times.

Personally, I think if a guy can get a 4.0 in Welding, he should go on the list. Welding is a more valuable skill than analytical discourse any day. Unless, of course, you want a job writing a Closer.

In all seriousness, good for these guys. As the NCAA reminds us, most of our basketball heroes end up "going pro in something else", and these guys have a nice head start. The fact that you could make a kick-ass all-star team based on basketball ability out of this list makes it even cooler.

• Oliver's Army Are On Their Way. Clemson 79-Miami (FL) 69. Littlejohn Coliseum was the right place and the right time for the Tigers, who solidified their tenuous grip on 3rd place in the ACC behind a 19-point effort by K.C. Rivers. Clemson has a deeper bench than one might think - five players average double figures in scoring, with Demontez Stitt not far behind at 9.1 per. Looks like it's up to someone else to "pull a Clemson" this year. See Below.

• Pop! Rhode Island 68-George Washington 85. "I'm not gonna lie to ya, Upstate. It's bad, real bad. We can let you have a few minutes with him before the end, but then we're going to have to let the Padre administer last rites." This is my way of saying: Maybe next year, Rhody. Losing to a team with a 9-14 record is a sure sign you're not in the right headspace for the NCAA tournament.

• Anchors Aweigh. Navy 83-American 68. The United States Naval Academy hasn't sent a team to the NCAA's since 1998, but it may surprise you to know that they've been there more often than any other service academy, amassing an 8-12 record in eleven separate tourneys. Army has zero appearances on the big stage, and Air Force has just four losses to show. This is the long way of saying that the Midshipmen have pulled into a tie with American atop the Patriot league. Since they swept AU, they also own the tiebreaker. Verrry Innnnteresting.

Tonight's Big Games

• Notre Dame (21-5) at Louisville (22-6). According to the Associated Press, Rick Pitino has no idea which defense to use against the Irish. If he wants to stop Luke Harangody, he may have to resort to a pitchfork-waving mob of villagers. The Beast continues to shore up his 20/10 average for the season, due in part to the speed and finesse of his teammates. Louisville is riding a seven-game win streak and playing at home, so this ought to be a doozy.

• Michigan State (22-5) at Wisconsin (23-4). The Spartans gobbled up Penn State and Iowa in their past two games, but now it's time to pick on someone their own size. Wisconsin, on the other hand, seems to be able to handle anyone in the Big Ten not named Purdue. This game is in Madison, where I'm pretty much expecting Steve Lavin and Brent Musberger to purchase a nice summer cottage together at this point.

Eric Angevine writes about college basketball for Storming the Floor and CAAZone. He can be reached at stormingthefloor@gmail.com.

Any of you who run your own blog know the joy of "search terms." While comments tell you what your regular readers think about your content, search terms show you what freaky, random internet strangers might find valuable in your accumulated pages of pseudo-journalism.

At STF, we get a ton of searches for the likes of "Bill Walker peeing," "Dan Dakich bald spot" and "Lute Olson sexy." Then there's the lonely soul who wandered in looking for late-80s Oklahoma guard Dave Sieger. But we also get a surprisingly steady flow of anonymous queries about Tennessee's Bruce Pearl. We're glad that hoops nation is turning to us to answer the tough questions, but the reach of our little site is not enough to truly solve these riddles. So, without further ado, let's use this here bully pulpit to battle some ignorance.

Search term: Bruce Pearl black or white? According to JewishSports.com, Bruce Pearl is a member of the tribe, having grown up in a reformed Orthodox home. So, the correct PC code word to use here is "swarthy." It covers all of your bases.

Bruce Pearl ladies man: Answer=hell yes. We've seen photos of an oiled-up Pearl gripping a young lady half his age on a boat somewhere. Then he unveiled his "drape 'em" move on Erin Andrews on live television over the past weekend. Women want him, and men want to be him.

Bruce Pearl Pat Summit relationship: AAAAAAAAAAAGH! MY SYNAPSES!!!!!

Is Bruce Pearl dirty? There are many ways to take this query. Is he guilty of recruiting violations? Not so far as the NCAA is concerned. Is his personal hygiene suspect? During and after a game, he's probably pretty rank, but I'm betting he at least takes a PTA shower and splashes on some Hai Karate before hitting the clubs at night. If it's young ladies wanting to know if Pearl is "up for it", then heck yes - Uncle Bruce will do anything, any time, anywhere. I think his record speaks for itself. (Ed. Note: We Illini fans might have a different definition of "dirty" than you do, at least when it comes to Pearl.)

Strangely enough, not one search for "Bruce Pearl topless" yet. Ah, well, there's always the postseason.

Apparently, These Two Schools Don't Like Each Other. Tennessee 69-Vanderbilt 72. This game was played in America's least telegenic gymnasium. However, the term barn-burner was a figurative, if accurate, description of the action contained therein. Shan Foster hit for 32, but it was freshman Keegan Bell (zero points) tracking down a loose ball on the one-hrmph line that saved Kevin Stallings' few remaining hairs. Coaching job of the night honors went to the Nashville cops, who somehow kept the student white-out from spilling onto the Memorial Gym floor, sparing the school a repeat of last year's Florida debacle.

Greg Oden Isn't Limping Through That Door. Ohio State 69-Indiana 72?. Remind me again why we're taking OSU seriously as a bubble team? With the exception of an early-season win at a then-healthy Syracuse, the Buckeyes have failed to answer the bell in every statement game they've been faced with. Give their at-large spot to the real deal in Ohio - the Kent State Golden Flashes. Love, love, love D.J. White, however. When Gordon flounders, Deej is there to pick up the pieces.

Sometimes A Loss is Still A Win. Western Michigan 56-Northern Illinois 49. The score of this game matters less than the fact that it was played at all. Former Colorado coach Ricardo Patton has successfully led the UNI Huskies back to the court following an extended break to mourn the victims of an on-campus shooting. Western Michigan, aware that they would be accorded the honor of being the next opponent for the struggling school, has been wearing black ribbons in solidarity. I'm not really the type who believes that sports heal all, but sometimes a team outing is the best way to put on a brave face for the public.

Tonight's Big Game

Again, I wasn't really feelin' it when it came to the significance of tonight's top 25 games. Instead, I went for a matchup that has a great deal of meaning in the at-large picture.

Miami (Fla.) (19-7) at Clemson (19-7). Clemson's tournament profile looks pretty good at this point, but if they really want to lay the doubts to rest and solidify their third-place standing in the ACC, it really behooves them to win this home game against a possible contender. On the Miami side, this is their last chance to make a statement for the committee outside of the conference tournament. We're dealing with a lot of shit here.

Coming Soon: Conference Tournaments

Eric Angevine writes about college basketball for Storming the Floor and CAAZone. He can be reached at stormingthefloor@gmail.com.