The Mayweather-Pacquiao Conspiracy Theory Is Colorblind

Here are the judges’ scorecards for Saturday’s fight, a clear unanimous decision for Floyd Mayweather over Manny Pacquiao. If you are a normal human being, there’s nothing notable here; just a cool artifact of a megafight, and some relief in the knowledge that the judging accorded with reality—no given in this sport.… »5/04/15 3:20pm5/04/15 3:20pm


Anonymous Seahawk Blames Final Play Call On Anti-Lynch Conspiracy

It's important to try and understand the bone-deep despair that has no doubt infected the Seattle Seahawks before judging their postgame comments. A certain madness can come from a gut-punch like the one they suffered in the final seconds of Super Bowl XLIX, and that madness can lead to people saying some pretty… »2/02/15 9:46am2/02/15 9:46am

Bill Simmons Lays Out Nonsensical Theory About LeBron James

At the half during last night's Miami Heat-Indiana Pacers game, ESPN multiplatform presence Bill Simmons offered up a remarkable theory to explain why LeBron James came out slowly in the game. James, he speculated, may have been distracted by the results of the NBA draft lottery, in which his former team, the… »5/21/14 12:02pm5/21/14 12:02pm

The Astounding Conspiracy Theories of Wall Street Genius Mark Gorton

Mark Gorton is a prominent financier and a respected entrepreneur. He founded the music sharing site Limewire, and he runs Tower Research, a famed high-frequency trading firm. Gorton also believes that the "ruthless" secret cabal that assassinated JFK and planned 9/11 could be coming to kill his family. »4/10/14 4:08pm4/10/14 4:08pm

The Tsarnaev Brothers Allegedly Followed 9/11 Conspiracies Online

The world had to wait a half hour, max, for people to speculate that the Boston Marathon bombing was a “false flag,” i.e., a disaster manufactured by the government and pinned on someone else for political ends. Among the first to apply his apparent omniscience and determine, based on virtually no facts, that the… »4/20/13 5:21pm4/20/13 5:21pm

Former ECW And WWE Wrestler Stevie Richards Has Political Aspirations, Is Insane

Via The Masked Man, former wrestler Stevie Richards has introduced the world to his ideals and policy recommendations (both soon to be ubiquitous in our political milieu) with a radio interview on VOC Wrestling Nation announcing his aspirations for state office. Richards spoke eloquently of his heightened civic… »11/03/12 12:15pm11/03/12 12:15pm

Some Celtics Fans Will Be Wearing Tim Donaghy Masks Tonight

Celtics fans, including the world's most famous Celtics fan, truly believe that the NBA is rigged and/or biased for Miami and against Boston. To do their best to give David Stern an aneurism, there's a campaign to print out and wear masks of everyone's favorite crooked ref Tim Donaghy. This is the best possible way to… »6/01/12 1:36pm6/01/12 1:36pm

Are Messi And Barcelona Sending Secret Messages To Help Rebels Smuggle Guns Into Syria?

The answer is, no, obviously not. That would be stupid. But we can't ignore it, because at least one entity is buying into the conspiracy theory that Messi, Pedro and their Barcelona teammates are sending hidden messages to the Syrian resistance via their on-field play in a recent Clásico: Syrian State TV. »3/22/12 10:10am3/22/12 10:10am

Youth-Baseball Umpire In Missouri Claims Pitcher, Catcher Conspired To Hit Him With A Pitch

In the fifth-inning of a big 18-and-under Mac-N-Seitz Midwest Championships and Showcase baseball game, home plate umpire Kyle Reynolds detected shenanigans were afoot. They were the sort of shenanigans in which a catcher allegedly jumps out of the way of a pitch so it strikes the umpire behind him, and the brand of… »8/13/11 1:00pm8/13/11 1:00pm

John Wall Also Knew The Cavs Were Going To Win The Lottery. HMM.

TrueHoop's Henry Abbott asks that we take a second look at this throwaway line from Harvey Araton's piece on Kyrie Irving in the New York Times today: "Tuesday night, John Wall — last year's first pick by Washington — whispered 'Cleveland' in [Irving's] ear before the cameras turned on." Hmm. HMM. [TrueHoop, New York… »5/19/11 6:10pm5/19/11 6:10pm

Anonymous Baltimore Orioles Employee Goes To Great Lengths To Inform Us That Coworkers' Wives Also Hate Obama

We received this envelope today, just two days after posting this critique of ESPN's profile on Baltimore Orioles outfielder Luke Scott. Immediate thought: a terrible press release, for some reason sent via paper, or some kind of cease-and-desist letter for misrepresenting Cal Ripken's children's book a few months… »4/27/11 4:45pm4/27/11 4:45pm