Yesterday, Craig Biggio celebrate the announcement of his end-of-season retirement by hitting a grand slam. Nice. Randy Johnson, on the other hand, is frustrated — so unlike him! — and is openly talking about never playing again.

Johnson, we understand, because he's 43 and built like Uwe Blab. But Biggio, Biggio will be eternally young for us. We know his skills have faded, but that doesn't mean we can't struggle to come to terms with the fact that we remember when Craig Biggio was a young catcher, and now he's too old to play. Which makes us too old to do lots of things.

Is This The End For Randy Johnson [Lion In Oil]
Game Hero [Crawfish Boxes]

First, Thomas. He hit his 500th homer yesterday and celebrated by ... being thrown out of the game for arguing a strike call late. This reminded us of that stupid Billy Crystal movie in which he throws Kareem Abdul-Jabbar out of his farewell game. Excellently played, Frank.

But not nearly as much fun as Biggio. You have to love a guy who, while notching his 3,000th hit, gets so excited that he runs into an obvious out at second base trying to stretch it to a double.

We salute these men, who displayed the sports equivalent of Miss America falling down right after receiving her crown.

Thank You Craig Biggio [Crawfish Boxes]
First The Achievement, Then The Disappointment [Jays Nest]

Craig Biggio wears a pin on his hat during spring training. The pin is the logo for the Sunshine Kids Foundation, which describes itself as a non-profit organization "committed to providing positive group activities and emotional support for young cancer patients."

Biggio is their national spokesman, and he wears the pin because this is the time of year when baseball card photographs are taken, and Biggio feels like the Sunshine Kids like seeing the logo on his baseball cards. He says he's been doing it for 20 years.

It stops now, though. Biggio was told before the last Astros game that he couldn't wear it anymore, and umpires even came out and checked to make sure it was gone. I don't know that Major League Baseball has ever investigated Barry Bonds that closely.

It's hard to figure out MLB's angle on this one. I know everyone's got their uniform regulations, but ... it's a pin, it's spring training, and there's a pretty good reason behind it. Panger at Foul Balls tried to get some answers by calling MLB offices, and ... well, Vinny in public relations sounds like just the kind of guy MLB wants taking their calls these days.

Biggio angry over cancer kids pin flap [Yahoo! Sports]
The Sunshine Kids [Sunshine Foundation]
Bud Selig Thinks "Just Say No" Is For Baseball Fans with Cable and Kids With Cancer [Foul Balls]

I was in Kissimmee, Fla., for the Astros spring training in 1992, 12 years old at the time. I was with my dad and a friend from my little league team standing outside of the clubhouse collecting autographs after a mid-March game. Jeff Bagwell signed for over an hour; he was the NL ROY in 1991 so he was very popular and extremely grateful to all of the fans. Then after a few other players came and went and the crowd dwindled, the star Catcher turned 2nd baseman and noted humanitarian Craig Biggio came barreling out of the clubhouse at full speed and plowed through the remaining crowd and jumped into his Explorer without so much as a fucking smile or cool-guy head-nod. He wasn't going anywhere, just sitting in his car waiting, so on my dad's suggestion, I wandered over to his window and waved and asked for him to sign my hat. He told me to fuck off and pretended like I was a bum trying to wash his windshield. I pleaded for about five seconds and gave up. As I turned to walk off, I ran right into famed steroid and coke fiend Ken Caminiti. I could tell he was the one Bidge was waiting on, so I did not try to stop him for an autograph or anything. He must've seen the dissappointment on my face because he called me over to the Explorer and started talking to me about Houston and my trip to FL. I was star struck and really nervous but he asked me if I wanted anything signed. I had a few of his cards in my stack so he spread them out on the hood of Biggio's truck and signed every one. He then engaged my dad in conversation and was very polite and respectful. I could see Craig fuming in his car because he was being held up, and it made a lasting impression on me. Ken may not have made all the right decisions in life and people may think he's a bum for his drug use, but he was the coolest Astro that year and he made a lifelong fan. As for Biggio ... take that Hutch award you just got and stick it in your ass.

And Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night (music box plays softly).

Athlete Run-Ins: Messing With Cade [Deadspin]