I feel like we've seen this before, Part I. Well, Dirk Nowitzki and his Mavericks got the playoff matchup they wanted...and five games later, they're once again on the outside looking in. Surprise, surprise.

Chris Paul had a triple-double (24 points, 11 rebounds, 15 assists), David West scored at will (25 points, 10-for-17), Jannero Pargo gave a "suck it, Jason Kidd!" performance (17 points, 7-for-9) and the New Orleans Hornets are movin' on up after a 99-94 victory. Man, what I wouldn't have given to be on Bourbon St. last night.

The Mavs didn't go down quietly. Or wisely. Jerry Stackhouse got himself ejected with 1:47 to play for batting the ball out of Paul's hands during a stoppage in play. Then Stack got all up in West's face. Brilliant moves, Jerry, both of them. Still, Dallas cut a 17-point lead to three with 33 seconds to go, and then they forced a big miss by Paul...but failed to grab the ensuing rebound. Tyson Chandler (10 points, 14 rebounds) smacked the rock out to Paul, who passed it to Peja Stojakovic, and Peja sealed the win with a couple freethrows.

Dirk Nowitzki (22 points, 13 rebounds, 6 assists) did his best, but the results - as always - were the same. Still, Nowitzki offered that "We're better than we showed this series." Sure, Dirk. We hear that every year.

I feel like we've seen this before, Part II. Back in his MVP days, Shaq liked to quote Aristotle, who once said, "Excellence is not an act, but a habit." Unfortunately for the Suns, they have a bad habit of losing big games to the Spurs. Over and over and over again...

Speed it up, slow it down, doesn't matter. San Antonio eliminated Phoenix once again. And the 92-87 loss stung Amare Stoudemire as much as anybody else. "Every year it seems like we always play the Spurs, and they beat us every single time. As long as I'm here we're going to break it sooner or later, because I'm tired of losing to these guys. I'm sick and fed up."

And least Stoudemire is young enough to wait it out. Steve Nash - who lost the ball three big times down the stretch - might be out of time. And he knows what just happened to his team. "I think on paper we have more talent than they do. But I think their experience, their commitment and understanding of what they're trying to do is greater than ours. Their ability to play together and make small plays on both ends of the floor is unsurpassed."

As usual, the Spurs used two guys to do most of the damage. Tony Parker had 31 points and 8 assists, and Tim Duncan added 29 points and 17 rebounds. No other San Antonio player reached double figures, but, as Nash pointed out, they did all the little things champions do. And the Suns didn't.

Smackdown in Motown. Random statistical phenomenon: The Philadelphia 76ers are now 0-1 since Samuel Dalembert got his crazy-ass new mohawk. And given the importance of the game in question, this was the worst possible time for Sam to go on a spectacular hair adventure.

The Pistons, who have apparently turned their targeting computers back on, hit 58 percent of their shots and regained the series lead with a signature 98-81 win. Chauncey Billups finally had a big game (21 points, 12 assists), Rip was his old basket-making self (20 points, 10-for-17), 'Sheed did his 'Sheed thang (19 points, 6 blocked shots), and Tayshaun Prince chipped in with 17 points.

You know how to tell that Detoit has become totally serious about finishing Philly off? The near-to-complete absence of overconfident trash talk. When asked about his team's chances in Game 6, 'Sheed said: "I don't think they're going to lay down at all. It's do or die for them. It's not going to be a cake walk." Hey...who is that guy and what has he done with Rasheed Wallace?!

Andre Iguodala - who scored a career playoff-high 21 points on 8-for-13 shooting - finally figured out how to score against the Pistons. Unfortunately for the Sixers, most of his other players forgot. Louis Williams (16 points) and Andre Miller (13 points, 5-for-17) reached double figures, but that's about it. And that amazing first round upset suddenly seems very far away...

Problem solved. The Houston Rockets finally figured out the best (and perhaps only) way to keep Tracy McGrady from suffering his patented fourth-quarter meltdown: Just end the fourth quarter with a commanding 19-point lead. Not to go all John Hollinger on you, but the Rockets win almost 100 percent of the games in which that happens. Behold the power of math!

Thanks to a 95-69 shot to Utah's meaty flanks, the Rockets have lived to fail another day. McGrady finished with 29 points, 5 rebounds, and 5 assists, and he even managed to scored 8 points in the fourth quarter...thanks in part to the fact that the game had already been decided. Now the King of Martyrs is filled with a ridiculous confidence. "We're in a great situation. We know we can win in Utah because we've done it before."

You know, back in college I convinced a friend to hit me with his car after a night of drinking our way through a Jackie Chan marathon. Sure, I survived, but thanks to the wonders of sobriety, I realize that just because I lived through my stupidity once doesn't mean I could necessarily do it every time. My point? Apparently, I'm an idiot.

Houston got some additional anti-elimination support from Luis Scola (18 points, 12 rebounds), Rafer Alston (14 points, 6 assists) and Creaky Mutombo (10 rebounds). Utah got double-doubles out of Carlos Boozer (19 points, 10 rebounds) and Mehmet Okur (14 points, 10 rebounds), but the Jazz shot 36 percent as a team and seemed to have developed a case of Let'swinitathomeitis.

The first sign of trouble was when Dallas followed a 30-point first quarter with a 14-point second quarter. Then David West scored 10 of his 24 points during a third quarter run that pushed the Hornets' 4-point halftime lead to 13. The Mavs would be unable to cut into that deficit, leading Jason Kidd to get kicked out for almost killing Jannero Pargo and a fan to get ejected by Mark Cuban for verbally harassing Chris Paul. It was an ugly night in Dallas all around, and it turned into an ugly 97-84 defeat for the home team.

Paul had 16 points, 7 rebounds, and 8 assists and Peja Stojakovic added 19 points and 5 boards for the Hornets, who shot 50 percent from the field and committed only 9 turnovers. The Mavericks, on the other hand, were shooting cross-eyed all night (36 percent). Dirk Nowitzki led the cowboys with 22 points and 13 rebounds, and Jason Terry scored 20. J-Kidd (3 points, 1-for-6, 3 assists) didn't do much before he got the boot, and Josh Howard hit only 3-for-16 (but it was a relaxed 3-for-16).

And while a 3-1 series deficit isn't insurmountable, does anybody have confidence that this particular Dallas Mavericks team can overcome it?

LeBron 3, DeShawn 1. That's the official score after four games, despite all the trash talk, hard fouls, and what King James called "some extracurricular activities going on outside and inside in this series." And with about three and a half minutes left in the first half, Stevenson tried to get in a little more extra credit upside LeBron's head while the King was motoring toward the hoop. The two men took a few menacing steps toward each other before teammates got between them ... much to the sweaty-palmed relief of David Stern. Still, according to LeBron, the Locksmith was lucky the incident didn't happen during a pickup game. "If we was on the park, something definitely would have escalated. But, you know, I guess that's what they want to do. They want to hurt Lebron James this series. It ain't working."

Superstars speaking in third person aside, LeBron ain't wrong. After Stevenson's flagrant foul, James hit one of two free throws and then knocked down a three-pointer from somewhere just outside the arena to help his team go on a streak of 13 unanswered points. Gilbert Arenas said it best when he explained "That (foul) got him mad."

James finished with 34 points and 12 rebounds, but his biggest play of the night came when he drew pretty much every Washington defender into the paint and this dished the ball to Delonte West, who hit the go-ahead three-pointer with 5.4 seconds left. The play was eerily reminiscent of when the Cleveland eliminated the Wizards in Game 6 of their first round series. In case you've forgotten, James hit Damon Jones for the winning bucket in the final seconds of overtime. Said James: "Washington definitely probably had a flashback." Definitely. Probably.

Gilbert Arenas — who had tied the game with a couple free throws and a crazy, off-balance banker from eight feet out — missed an isolation three-pointer as time expired. And that was that: Cleveland 100, Washington 97.

In addition to the game-winning three, Delonte West had a career playoff high 21 points. The Cavaliers also got four three-pointers out of Boobie Gibson and 12 rebounds from Ben Wallace. Antawn Jamison led the Wiz with 23 points and 11 rebounds, Caron Butler scored 19, and Brendan Haywood added 16.

Pride game! And to think: Some people thought the Spurs were going to sweep. No way. The Suns were playing for a little pride, and they came out with the kind of reckless abandon and defensive intensity that would win them a championship if they could do it every night. But at least they did it for one game and thus saved themselves the shame and embarrassment of getting eliminated at home.

And believe it or not, the Suns' superstars weren't the authors of yesterday's 105-85 butt-kicking. That honor went to the tandem of Raja Bell (27 points, 5-for-7 from three point range) and Boris Diaw (20 points, 10 rebounds, 8 assists). And their out-of-nowhere revival was exactly what Phoenix needed ... even if it came about three games too late.

And let's face it, this loss isn't going to faze anybody on the Spurs. As Tim Duncan put it: "We didn't expect to sweep these guys. We're excited to be in the situation we're in, up 3-1. We've got to win one more game, and we get to go home and try to win it there. Those are a lot of things that are in our favor." Well, actually it's only two things. But in all fairness, it's a big two.

The Big Cactus added 14 points and 12 rebounds, and he also defied Gregg Popovich's Hack-a-Shaquery by hitting 6-for-10 from the line. Tim Duncan had 14 points and 10 boards for San Antonio, and Tony Parker scored 18 but shot only 7-for-17 against Diaw's long-armed and aggressive defense. All in all, it was a great win for the Suns. But still, I have a sneaking suspicion that the 20/20 Rule could be in effect on Tuesday.

Order is restored. For now. The Detroit Pistons pulled off one of their patented "big wins just when everybody thinks they're down and out," using a 34-16 third quarter blitzkrieg to beat Philly 93-84 and tie their first round series at 2-2.

Said Chauncy Billups: "Everybody knows that we are good under pressure. I hate that we put ourselves in this position a lot of times. I believe in the guys who are in our locker room." Those guys certainly made believers out of the 76ers, particularly Tayshaun Prince (23 points, 11-for-12) and Rasheed Wallace (20 points, 10 rebounds, 3 three-pointers in the third quarter).

In addition to 'Sheed raining down threes, the Pistons forced seven turnovers during their third-quarter turnaround. As Sixers coach Maurice Cheeks put it: "The game turned just like that. We gave them life in the third quarter."

Philadelphia's biggest problem, besides the whole losing the game thing, is the continued MIA status of leading scorer Andre Iguodala. The Detroit defense has totally taken him out of his game all series. Last night, he scored only 12 points on 4-for-16 shooting and committed 5 turnovers. It's hard to imagine Philly winning another game in this series if that continues.

Dominating the headlines this Saturday is the shocking (shocking!) admission by the Mavericks' Josh Howard that he, like every one in the NBA who isn't J.J. Reddick, smokes trees in the off-season. Also: baseball players take steroids and politicians cheat on their spouses.

"Most of the players in the league use marijuana and I have and do partake in smoking weed in the offseason sometimes," Howard told The Michael Irvin Show on the local ESPN affiliate. "I mean, that's my personal choice and my personal opinion, but I don't think that's stopping me from doing my job."

Irvin then laughed and called him a lightweight.

Yes, marijuana is one of them there controlled substances so the league and Mark Cuban have wrung their hands until they're rubbed raw about meting out symbolic punishment. Not that DUIs are a problem or anything, Melo.

As long as weed is illegal there has to be disproportionate punishment for even daring to speak its name. That's why you have to be subtle about it, Josh, like Clipse and Pharrell. See, they make you think "Gangta Lean" is really about some hot chick. But there's a secret message you get only if you're superattentive like me: it's about weed!

Oh girl ya taste is
Sweet like mornin' dew
I would go crazy girl
If I couldn't have none of you

Hell yeah. She sounds HOTT!

I said ya from Jamaica
Straight outta my Mercedes trunk

Well, uh, now I'm kind of hoping it's not a girl, to be perfectly honest. The message here is be subtle. Or try drinking in your free time. No one loses their job for that!

His latest suit is against Dallas Mavericks owner (and president of the Will Leitch fanclub) Mark Cuban and 2007 MVP Dirk Nowitzki. for about $30 million.

Here's what has his hamster wheel smoking this time.

"Dunking over my LIfe/Mark Cuban missle crisis on my
civil rights"

Respectfully submitted: Jonathan Lee Riches

The SaLaD Mavericks play the ETtolraHc (Ha. I'm a fuck). SnAelRo WEn Hornets in game 3 of their playoff series Friday.

Jonathan Riches suit [Dallas Observer]

Speaking of The Flying Dutchman, he had himself a game — a team-high 27 points on 7-for-11 shooting — but he was also a big grumpy-puss all night long, scowling around and screaming at his invisible friend (Herr Gefartenalldertimen) once after he threw the ball out of bounds. Dirk may have the trophy, and he may be in all the history books, but he sure doesn't act like an MVP, does he?

And how about the Little General? After watching his team get sliced and diced by Paul in Game 1, Avery Johnson chose to double-team the tiny point guard early and often in Game 2. That strategy ... didn't work. Paul had 6 points and 8 assists in the first quarter, he had a double-double by halftime (12 points, 10 assists), and by game's end he had become the first player in NBA history (as far as I know) to have at least 30 points and 10 assists in his first two career playoff games. If you didn't just say "wow," I'll assume Agent Smith just popped out of the Matrix and made your mouth disappear.

Paul got some bigtime backup from David West (27 points), Peja Stojakovic (22 points, 5-for-7 from three-point range) and Tyson Chandler (10 points, 11 rebounds, 3 blocked shots). Meanwhile, Nowitzki's fellow starters looked too razzle-dazzled by Paul to do much of anything: Jason Kidd shot 3-for-10 and had 8 assists; Josh Howard scored 10 points and also went 3-for-10; and Erick Dampier had an Oliver Miller-like 6 points and 6 boards. The only bright spot for Dallas was the bench play from Jason Terry (16 points, 4 assists) and Brendan Bass (19 points, 8 rebounds). The Hornets now lead the series 2-0. Game 3 is on Friday.

Super. Man. More super than man. Dwight Howard had his second 20-20 game of the playoffs with 29 points and 20 rebounds, cradling the Orlando Magic in his mighty arms and flying them to an exciting 104-103 win over the Toronto Raptors. I now believe a man can fly.

After the game, Howard talked about his all-consuming need to defend truth, justice and his team's playoff hopes. "It was tough to come back and play the same way I played the first game. But one of the things (coach Stan Van Gundy) has put in my head, and (assistant coach Patrick Ewing), is just trying to play as dominant as I could on both ends of the floor. Since the last game, the only thing on my mind, when I go to sleep, when I wake up, at the gym with the guys, is to dominate."

And that's just what he did, with the Raptors playing the role of the gimp. Not that Chris Bosh submitted meekly and without a fight. The mightiest dino had 29 points and 10 rebounds, which was good, but he also missed a 19-footer with 1.9 seconds that would have won it, which was bad. Now, you might be thinking, "Bosh put it up from 19 feet out to win it ... is that really the best shot they could have gotten?" And that would be a good question. But Bosh had a rationale for his desperation heave from the perimeter.

"I knew I was going to have space. The time before I drove to the basket and I didn't get the call. I didn't want to put it in the referee's hands. I wanted to get a clean look — I felt like I did a decent job. I got a decent look and just missed the shot." If by "decent look" he means "I could kinda sorta see the basket," then he's absolutely right. But whether or not it was a good shot, the end result is the same: The Raptors are down 2-0, and that's a pretty deep tar pit for an extinct lizard to crawl out of.

Orlando got 18 points a piece from Jameer Nelson and Rashard Lewis, and Hedo Turkoglu added 12 points and 9 rebounds. Toronto's Jason Kapono had a "Return To Jurassic Park" performance with 20 points. (It's about time, Jason.)

Jason Voorhees would be impressed. Chee-chee-chee ah-ah-ah! Just when you think they're finally dead and buried, the Spurs crawl out of their maggot-encrusted graves, slip on a hockey mask and go back to hacking and slashing the competition. Meanwhile, Phoenix keeps rising from its own ashes seemingly for the express purpose of getting killed by the Spurs over and over and over again ... Groundhog Day-style. And I think I just set a new two-sentence record for unrelated references.

The Suns slipped on one of the Gorilla's banana peels and fell into a 2-0 hole after last night's 102-96 loss. Phoenix ran out to an early 14-point lead behind quick starts from Amare Stoudemire (33 points, 7 rebounds, 3 blocked shots) and Shaq (19 points, 14 rebounds, 4 blocked shots), but their defense couldn't — if you can even call it that — couldn't stop, contain, or even sort of slow down Tony Parker (32 points, 7 assists) or Manu Ginobili (29 points). Toss in a little Tim Duncan for good measure (18 points, 17 rebounds), and San Antonio's titanic trio accounted for 79 of their team's 102 points.

The 60 Million Dollar Man had 23 points and 10 assists, but the Suns got next to nothing from Grant Hill (zero points, 0-for-1), Leandro Barbosa (zero points, 0-for-7) or Raja Bell (8 points, 2-for-7), and that's not going to cut it. Not that the Spurs bench was lighting it on fire, but at least Michael Finley scored all of his 8 points in a 10-0 third quarter run that helped the old guys take control for good. Advantage: Spurs. In more ways than one.

After Dallas wrapped up their season and secured the seventh seed by beating the Hornets, Dirk Nowitzki went and opened his big German mouth. "This was definitely a win we wanted to get. The Lakers are probably the hottest team in the West. We definitely didn't want to face them in the first round. ... (New Orleans) had a great year, but I think we match up pretty well."

You know, it's one thing for a team to have a preferred first round matchup — everybody has one — but it's another thing altogether to tell it to the media. Do you really want to give your opponents additional ammunition? (No.) Do you want your enemy to be able to motivate themselves with the "lack of respect" card? (No.) And do you really want to tempt the fates that have been so cruel to you over the last few years? (No.) Seriously, Dirk ... WTF?

The season series: The series was tied at 2-2, with the home team winning every game.

Good news for the Mavs: Dallas went 6-3 down the stretch, and that streak included wins over the Warriors (who were fighting to make the playoffs), Suns (who trying to get homecourt advantage), Jazz (ditto) and Hornets (who had nothing to play for but were seemingly trying to win the game). Even better, Dirk Nowitzki won the Phoenix and Utah games with big shots down the stretch. Could it be ... is it possible ... that Dirk has finally overcome his case of clutchshotitis?!

Bad news for the Mavs: The Hornets are 30-11 at home and won both games against Dallas at New Orleans Arena. On the flipside, the Mavericks — while great at home (34-7) — have the same road record as the "they're tragically bad on the road" Utah Jazz (17-24). And did I mention they don't have homecourt advantage? As Hubie Brown would say: "You've got to win on the road in the playoffs if you want to advance."

Reality check: Do you trust the Mavericks? They're like a girlfriend/boyfriend who keeps cheating on you: It's going to take a lot for them to earn your trust back, you know? At the end of the day, I just don't think they have it in them to win in the playoffs ... even with Jason Kidd.

Hornets player(s) to watch: Chris Paul. He is the New Orleans offense. David West. He must score points so Paul doesn't feel pressured to do everything (and perhaps too much). Jannero Pargo. He must be the spark plug off the bench. Bonzi Wells. He's their only lowpost option, and an inside game is critical in the playoffs.

Mavericks player(s) to keep an eye on: Jason Kidd. He has to contain Paul, and he has to hit a shot or two from the outside. Dirk Nowitzki. He has to lead — really lead — and I'm not sure he's ever actually done that before. Josh Howard. He just needs to do what he does. Erick Dampier and Brandon Bass. They need to control the boards and keep Chris Paul out of the paint. Preventing Tyson Chandler from getting all those uncontested alley-oops would be nice, too.

Key(s) to the series: The Hornets need some solid contributions from their bench. Dallas needs to play like gangbusters on the road. Mark Cuban needs to keep his mouth shut and trust his coach and players to win without his constant yelling and lobbying to the officials.

Prediction: Hornets in seven.

Get ready for one of those vaunted point guard battles, which is kind of like saying "prepare to see who grows lawns better," or "great moments in quarterback duels." It's true, Chris Paul and Jason Kidd will guard each other; given Paul's problems with the chunky Deron Williams, Kidd might be able to keep him from penetrating non-stop. But what's important here is that, on the whole, the struggle is largely parallel. Being a point guard involves a lot more than facing down the man in front of you.

In fact, this whole series is about two teams passing in the night. Neither one will be vindicated or shamed by the outcome, because it's the merest blip compared to the baggage they carry. The Mavs, in case you've forgotten, were unceremoniously ousted in last year's first round by those Satanic Warriors. They became a running joke, Dirk had everything down to his zip code questioned, and they started the year determined to move on. Then they swung a big trade for the aging Kidd, had to live without a full-speed Josh Howard, lost Nowitzki for a minute and then rallied to sneak into the postseason.

Cheap irony of the century: If the Warriors' win was fueled by BELIEVE, the Mavs are fighting an uphill battle against doubt. You've got to figure that a dominant regular season would've been even worse for them in this respect, since it would've set them up the punchline. But this team is fighting to prove itself, not in a "we are the underdog" way, but to battle past practical and psychological obstacles as they try to restore their shattered credibility. The Kidd trade just diverted the issue — it felt like an admission of failure, which is an important part of the healing process. And yet this current configuration hasn't exactly been all barrel-chested, and no amount of qualifiers can excuse the fact that, still, people don't believe in the Mavs.

The Hornets, on the other hand, have spent all season trying to convince the league that they're for real. Well first, they had to get people to acknowledge their existence. But after accomplishing that, the basketball public just kept waiting. What's more, while Paul's got that chip on his shoulder from the 2005 Draft, and M.I.A.'ers like Mo Peterson and Rasual Butler could easily embrace the "us against everyone mentality," this team lacks edge. They just kept winning, never acknowledging how unlikely their ascent had been, carrying themselves like NOLA Hornet, Toast of the West was a perfectly natural occurrence. And thus, people still expect things to snap back to their appropriate order, as they seemed to slightly when the Lakers passed them in the standings.

Chris Paul has claimed a position as his own in a way reminiscent of Nash, Shaq or Duncan. Kidd is an old master with nothing to prove but always ready to remind the world how much he matters. It's weird, Kidd goes back and forth between neglected and receiving an O'Neal-like slurp-job from the media. This is your point guard battle, guns drawn at high noon, but it really doesn't encapsulate what's going on in this series.

Paul will sparkle. Kidd will have three triple-doubles. Yet neither of these two men can provide an answer to their searching teams. This is about David West getting someone to recognize him on the street. Peja making it known that his three-point shooting is more potent than ever. Dirk and Josh Howard playing like a one-two punch that deserves a title shot. The Mavs asserting their commitment to defense, the Hornets lifting the veil that has thus far clouded their objectively lovely track record. Hell, this isn't even about these two teams playing each other; it's not a match-up, per se, it's two mirror images in desperate need of very much the same affirmation. Winning will start the process, but in a way, it doesn't matter who advances.

Next round, these questions will be only slightly less settled for whichever of these teams passes through the gauntlet. And that's a shame, since this will be one hell of a series. Reports of Dallas's demise have been greatly exaggerated, and the void around NOLA is almost as weird as the team's unexpected ascent. Maybe, at some point, we'll realized that these two teams are essentially playing themselves — in more ways than one. Both are wrestling with issues of identity that may linger until they're eliminated, and yeah, these two teams do have their similarities.

Let's just hope they don't look each other in the eye, or else they might all catch on fire and bring about the end of the world.

In response, Cuban has said he is encouraging ALL bloggers to apply for credentials. You might take this as a positive thing if he weren't saying it with such a smirk.

"Which means we will encourage all bloggers to apply, whether they be someone on blogspot who has been posting for a couple weeks, kids blogging for their middle school Web site or those that work for big companies," wrote Cuban, a blogger himself. "We won't discriminate at all."

That's pretty awesome, actually; Cuban is being a dick to prove a point, but it's a good point: Seriously, then, what IS the difference? It's really just a URL, right? What counts as "credentialed" again? If True Hoop weren't at ESPN, would Henry Abbott be less qualified to come in the locker room?

Predictably, now the Associated Press Sports Editors are mad.

"With all due respect for the potential journalism talent in the middle school ranks, this rebuttal smacks with the tartness of sour grapes," Fannin, managing editor for sports and features at the Kansas City Star wrote in an e-mail. "Is this really the standard the NBA wants to set for blogging?

"We're not asking the Mavericks or Mark Cuban to discriminate," added Fannin, who earlier in his career worked at The News. "We're simply seeking a common-sense distinction between someone who blogs professionally as part of an accredited media's beat coverage and someone who buys a ticket to the game."

So now EVERYBODY's mad. Say what you will about Cuban, but he's no dummy.

NBA Tells Dallas Mavericks To Allow Locker Room Access To Bloggers [Dallas Morning News]

And while Mark Cuban is busy waging a one-billionaire war against the blogging menace, his team is melting down faster than Chernobyl, only without the fun glow-in-the-dark animals and mutant babies: The Mavericks have lost three in a row at home for the first time in years, are 0-8 against winning teams since trading for Jason Kidd, and are about two games from being out of the playoffs. Speaking of J-Kidd, he pulled off a minor miracle by scoring a whopping 7 points - more than double his output from the last two games - and even hitting a semi-clutch three-pointer in the fourth quarter. Didn't help, though. Tim Duncan shot like he had a 20-sided die stuck in his eye but still finished with 19 points and 13 rebounds. Meanwhile, Ginobili was unfazed by The Strangler's strong-arm tactics, finishing with a game-high 26 points to go along with 8 rebounds and 6 assists. Stack led Dallas with 19 points.

Allen and Carmelo achieve mutual gratification...in winning. As of last night, this was ESPN's front-page headline for the Denver/Toronto game: A.I., Melo combine for 69, Nuggets stop Raps. They said, "combine for 69." Uh huh-huh-huh, huh-huh, huh. God, I'm such a 12-year-old. Anyway, Iverson scored 36, Carmelo added 33, and the Nuggets actually held an opponent to "only" 100 points and 50 percent shooting in their 109-100 win. That's a pretty good defensive effort for them. And actually, Kenyon Martin's crazy-man defense on Chris Bosh (6-for-16 shooting, 0-for-1 in the fourth quarter, 4 turnovers) probably won the game for Denver (although Bosh still had an "almost" triple-double of 17 points, 12 rebounds, and 9 assists). Jamario Moon had 15 points and a career-high 15 rebounds for the not-so-mighty dinos, losers of eight of their last 10 games.

Hey, Detroit, you can wake up any time now. The Pistons are just one victory away from reaching the 50-win plateau for the seventh consecutive season, which is almost enough to make you forget that they're only 10-7 since the All-Star break. Almost. Last night, Detroit shot bad (43 percent), defended worse (giving up 53 percent shooting), and lost to Washington 95-83 despite strong efforts from Rip Hamilton (19 points), Tony McDyess (14 rebounds), and Chauncey Billups (11 assists). Antawn Jamison was the Wizards' magic man with 24 points, 12 rebounds, and 0 assists, and Tough Juice tossed in another 17. Agent Zero update: Gilbert Arenas took part in the the Wizards' morning shootaround and expected to get a little PT, but Washington's team doctors wouldn't clear him to play. [Arnold Schwarzenegger voice] And the Hibachi was steamed. [/Arnold Schwarzenegger] About an hour before the game, Gil was heard muttering, "I'm not coming back this year." Then, during the game, he told ESPN, "I was ready, but they went out there with a fishing pole and yanked me back." Ooookay. What, does Gil have some kind of communicable disease or something?

So much for Phil Jackson and the Lakers "owning" the Warriors. The Golden State Warriors built a 26-point lead, let the Lakers back into the game, and then withstood a Kobe Bryant barrage to beat L.A. 115-111. Monta Ellis had 31 points, 7 rebounds, and 5 assists for the Warriors, but Stephen Jackson was Mr. Clutchtastic, out-dueling The Mamba by hitting three-pointers with 38.5 and 8.1 seconds left to cockblock the Lakers' comeback. And while you could point to several reasons why the Lakers lost - 41 point shooting (led by Kobe's 13-for-30), 18 turnovers (including 14 in the first half), and the fact that Ronny Turiaf kind of looks like a special needs child - the real problem was that Phil Jackson recently said that his squad was "the team to beat" in the West. And that's what we like to call the stat curse. Bryant had 36 points, a season-high 14 rebounds, and 8 assists, and Lamar Odom added 19 points and 22 boards for L.A.

Our favorite part about reading the accounts from Kamenetzky, McMahon and Abbott this morning is that Mark Cuban had specifically given their individual names to the man standing guard at the locker room's door.

I asked the PR staff as soon as I got here if I would be allowed in, so there were no surprises. But as it happened, I had to go through the same door later to talk to a Mavericks staffer. And a security guard took a look at my credential, and said, very nicely, "you know you're banned, right?"

I ended up having to loiter with the guard for a while as I got clearance to talk to said staffer. We talked a little. I had heard that before the game tonight they had to distribute lists with the names of the bloggers. And this poor dude was the one stuck with the embarrassing task of enforcing this goofy ban. And as I was small talking to the guy, another staffer — blogger alert! — rushed over to ask the security guard if everything was OK.

Honestly, that guy has the coolest job title of all time: Blogger Wrangler. That has to jump out at you on a resume, you know?

Another fun highlight of blog affaire de Cuban: Tom Jolly, the sports editor of The New York Times, mistakenly thinking he could somehow reason with Cuban. (Mr. Jolly: Don't bother! It doesn't work!)

The real enjoyment of this will be when the Mavericks fall off in the next couple of years, and suddenly the team actually needs bloggers for some coverage. Seem strange? It shouldn't; That's what the Pacers are doing. They're just happy they have people who still care about the Pacers. Someday the Mavs might be in the same position.

Pity The Security Guard [True Hoop]

That is to say: We love Henry's site, but we're not sure what ultimate point will be made. Abbott is just as justified to be in that locker room tonight as he was before he went to ESPN — he's just as respected and diligent as he has always been — but that's the undercurrent of Abbott's trip. Sure, you'll ban bloggers, Cuban ... but will you ban an ESPN blogger?

We hope there's some sort of scuffle with security. But we have our doubts. Good luck, Henry.

Off To Dallas [True Hoop]

After a Dallas Morning News reporter/blogger broke some embarrassing news about a "Fire Avery Johnson" campaign after a game late last month, the Mavericks and Cuban announced that no one writing a blog will be allowed in the locker room.

The Dallas Mavericks will not allow ANY writer into the locker room areas pre-game and post-game whose primary purpose is to blog no matter what affiliation. They may still represent their respective publication at games but will not be granted locker room access.

We have gone this route because we did not want to give preferential treatment to any blogger, whether they are an individual or from a large media outlet. We just do not have enough room in the locker room, nor enough media passes to fairly accommodate everyone.

Tim MacMahon, the blogger/reporter who might have caused all this fuss, points out that the Mavericks locker room is enormous and has never had a problem with overcrowding before. (He can't say it, because he's all "impartial" and "objective" and therefore can't just completely call bullshit on Cuban, so we will: Bullshit.) We presume this no-bloggers policy doesn't extend to, of course, Cuban himself.

We haven't talked much about our whole imbroglio with Cuban, not because we feared we were in the wrong (we're 100 percent certain we weren't), but because we hadn't quite come to terms with the fact that a guy we've always respected could be so petty and deluded. (He's also partially responsible for No End In Sight and Bubble, two great movies.) But our experience with him doesn't compare to this. Essentially, a man who supposedly is a champion of new media is attempting to control coverage of his team, even from "legitimate" credentialed reporters. Charming, really.

There has to be something more to this, right? Right?

Cuban's Policy Bans Bloggers From Locker Room [MavsBlog]

To remind: he made $4.3 million for not filing his papers.

The Mavs and Nets needed Van Horn, whose new contract will pay him $75,439 per day over the final 57 days of the regular season, or $148,275 for each of the Nets' final 29 games. Before the NBA would approve the deal, league officials had to be convinced by agent David Falk and his client that Van Horn would report to New Jersey and make an honest attempt at a comeback.

See, now, that's a nice gig. We also have not filed our retirement papers and encourage any NBA team looking for salary cap relief to call us. We will make an "honest attempt" to make the team.

This completely screws up the ESPN Trade Machine, by the way. Being able to just sign random retired players for whatever amount you want is pretty difficult to simulate.

Jason Kidd Trade Good For Van Horn [St. Lake Tribune]
Doing The Deal And Dishing The Dirt [Blog Maverick]

Devean George went scoreless in the first half, missing six shots from the floor (three 3-pointes) and a pair of free throws. He did contribute a couple assists and a steal to the Mavs' cause. Maybe George is trying to prove to the Mavs' brass that he can shoot like Jason Kidd.

Pretty much. Far be it from us to tell Mark Cuban how to do his job — oh, crap: Did we just do something unethical by mentioning his name in a place other than GQ magazine? We hope not — but if this deal is unable to be reconstructed, we think this might ultimately be for the best. And not just because it's a big pain in the ass to transfer a spousal restraining order from New Jersey to Texas.

Who Needs Kidd When You Have George? [DallasNews.com]

• Flippin' The Script. I'd like to be more excited about Nowitzki's 29 points, eight boards, six dimes and three blocks in the Mavs 121-99 win over the Warriors last night. I really would. But I'm afraid he'll just let me down again come May. He can be such a tease. And besides, GS played like ass in this game. Baron Davis scored just 10 points on 2-for-14 shooting. He couldn't do that again if his name was Antoine Walker.

• Fear His Name. Kevin Garnett scored 11 of his 26 points late and held The Yao in check after Pollard and Perkins had fouled out as the Celtics beat the Rockets 97-93. "It was superstar on superstar," James Posey said. "[KG] accepts those challenges, and we jumped on his back and he carried us to a win. Literally."

• Decagon The Halls With Boughs Of Holly. Move over ... um ... Mark Aguirre? No, that can't be it. John Salley? Let's try Fennis Dembo. Whatever. Richard Hamilton's 20 points made him the 10th-leading scorer in Pistons history, and he added nine assists and seven rebounds to help Detroit earn its 10th consecutive victory by killing Washington 106-93.

• Back On Track. What in the world has gotten into these Portland area kids? One minute they're out shoving referees and making bongs out of Sprite cans, the next minute they're winning 14 of 15 games. Brandon Roy fought through a poor shooting night to score 24 points to help his Blazers to a 90-79 victory over the woeful Timberwolves. Al Jefferson posted 29 points, 16 rebounds and no Bills in the loss.

For the record, I was against moving Jason Terry to the bench from the very beginning. But he seems to take to it; scoring 31 points to lead Dallas over Houston. "He just had that look in his eye and his shot really looked good,'' coach Avery Johnson told AP. "We are very surprised when he misses; we're kind of spoiled these days.'' Terry scored seven straight points in the third quarter, then he opened the fourth quarter with a 3-pointer, giving Dallas the lead. Nowitzki had 19 points.

And dear tiny infant Jesus, we thank you for Mavs Moneyball, which provided us with the above excellent NASCAR report.

• Wade Right In. Dwyane Wade reported no problems related to his left knee or left shoulder — both of which were operated on May 15 — after his first full contact practice on Monday. But the Heat (0-3) still doesn't know when he'll be ready to return to the lineup.

• Ah New Jersey Nets, You Sly Boots. There's nothing like a pink slip to motivate your employees. Antoine Wright was told by the Nets that they won't be picking up the option on his contract next year, so Wright came through with a big fourth quarter and overtime to lead New Jersey over Chicago 112-103 on Wednesday. Wright scored 14 of his career-high 21 points in the fourth quarter and OT.

• CA On KD. Kevin Durant had a rocky debut — hey, they're playing defense! They can do that? — as the Nuggets beat the SuperSonics 120-103 in the season opener for both teams. Durant scored 18 points in just over 31 minutes, shooting 7-of-22. Carmelo Anthony, who guarded Durant, had 32 points, with three 3-pointers. "He's going to be all right," said Anthony of Durant. "Hopefully no one puts too much pressure on him."

• Insert Lead Paint Joke Here. Yi Jianlian had nine points in 25 minutes and was 4-for-5 from the floor as Milwaukee lost to Orlando 102-83. Rashard Lewis scored 26 points on 9-of-13 shooting for the Magic.

Today: Dirk Nowitzki. Your author is Bethlehem Shoals. His words are after the jump.

—-—-—-—-—-—

If sports really resembled sports talk radio, Dirk Nowitzki would've gone out like T-Mac: wounded, weeping, and painfully aware of his imperfection. Instead, when last we saw Dirk, he was accepting the 2006-07 MVP, commendation for a superb, but empty, regular season.

This award marked the completion of his Avery Johnson-sponsored makeover. When Dirk first entered the league, he was a fantastic creature, the kind of felicitous monster that makes grown men rub their eyes and giggle. He came from a far-off land, tutored in a forest to overthrow convention and challenge assumptions. But griffins don't break bottles and unicorns never slobber; even as a star Dirk remained magical and aloof, the epitome of a Dallas team that was both breathtaking and disposable.

Then came Avery, a holy-rolling basketball firebrand determined to make the Mavs legit. Under Nellie, Dirk had shot when he felt like it, from any spot that felt right. He shared top billing with Steve Nash and Michael Finley, rarely caring if he came off as the franchise player. In a sense, he was the anti-go-to-guy. Avery changed all that, expecting Dirk to use his size, quit with the haywire threes, get to the line and just generally command respect.

And you know, it worked. Dirk became a smarter, more imposing player, albeit one that didn't always carry himself like the king of the border. What mattered was that he became the Mavs' anchor, their rock. Johnson built an offense around him, and the team ruled the games that mean nothing. In the Warriors series, though, Dirk Nowitzki's past flashed before him and swallowed his eyes. A Don Nelson-coached team, more demented than Dallas had ever dared be, assaulted Dirk with chaos-as-order. There were no positions, no sets, and no logical problems to be solved. The Warriors neutralized Nowitzki with a poison he knew all too well.

Most pundits saw Dirk's disappearing act as proof that he wasn't cut out to be El Hombre, that he was soft and lacking in giant nuts. The MVP meant less than nothing; it was a cruel irony that sang out Nowitzki's shame. But I've always felt that the trophy, and its burden, belonged every bit as much to Avery. He sold Dirk a bill of goods, training him in the ways of Popovich. And then, all that rationality proved to be no match for the very credo Dirk had abandoned.

As we head into 2007-08, Dirk Nowitzki sits at a crossroads. Avery Johnson helped him get recognized as the league's Most Valuable Player. Johnson got the team to the Finals in 2006, and then proceeded to put together seven months of irrefutable excellence. Dirk will do as he is commanded, and we'll get another chance to see just how legit Dirk/Avery is. But if they once again collapse (2006) or get blindsided (2007), Avery Johnson might not be the coach for 2008-09.

Where would that leave our valiant Teuton? This spring, he was harshly reminded of where he came from. That back-handed MVP isn't a referendum on his soul; it's an opportunity for reflection. As Dirk grinds out Avery's will and makes that unconvincing gladiator-grimace, will he think about Stephen Jackson? Will he wish it were he running wild on the Warriors? Or is this his temptation in the desert: Dirk, starved for pride and identity, must confront S-Jax and his false promise of Warriors paradise.

Of course, if the Mavs win it all, this angst becomes moot. However, there's a sizable chance this won't happen; if Avery moves on, or Dirk finds himself relocated, then the gangly German will enter a new phase of his career. In college, there was this thing called Hegel, and it went like this: When opposites collide in history, a new day is forged. It's as if GWFH sent a message to the future to direct his younger countryman.

It's normal for players to go through several phases in their career, usually as a function of experience and bodily changes. Dirk stands poised to enter a third phase of his prime, which is pretty much unprecedented. His wild years defied the logic of the "career year;" last season, he proved it to be something of a sham. At least for him. It's hard to imagine exactly what would come next, but that's part of what makes Dirk Dirk, the wonder that Avery has tried so hard to wring out and replace with kerosene. Would it be surprising if Nowitzki — one of the more exceptional players of our age — needed to find his own way of winning?

Either that, or Dirk's a spineless fake who doesn't deserve that max contract. But you already knew that.

Yes, in an improvement on last week, Cuban wasn't even in the last two to be elimiated; the boot went to some model we've never heard of. Which means Mark Cuban will be gracing the planet with his hoofing stylings for one more week. The kid's got pluck!

According to people who watch this stuff, it might come down to Cuban and Wayne Newton. Of course it will. If we can get more screenshots like this one, christ, keep going, Mark! Last chance to keep him alive, America!

Mark Cuban Dances, Taunts, Oggles [The Sports Hernia]

Don Nelson's attorney, John O'Connor, who said Cuban is suing Nelson, claiming the Warriors beat the Mavs in the first round because the Warriors' coach — and former coach of the Mavs — had "confidential information and he [Cuban] wants to enjoin Don from coaching against the Mavericks."

"There is no basis in our view," O'Connor said. "I suppose he [Nelson] knows [Dirk] Nowitzki likes to go right instead of left, but normally that's not a trade secret."

Every year, Cuban becomes a little less of the "hey, I'd be a crazy fan like that if I owned a team too!" guy and more of the "jesus christ, he's really quite nuts, isn't he?" guy. It's fun to watch.

Oh, God, Mark Cuban's Being A Jackass Again [Uwe Blog]

"Mark Cuban is a guy who . . . puts so much pressure on the players. He wants to win so much, ya know, he wants to put himself in the position of the players. He wants to be a player, I guess. And he's not a player . . . [Cuban] probably always wanted to be a winner all his life, and if ya look like him, you can't be a winner. So he wants to put himself in the place of the players, so what happens is, the team choked."

Fantastic analysis. In fact, I think Hubie Brown said the same thing. Cuban responded in today's New York Post.

"I guess Donald is still upset that he can't afford to buy an NBA team. No doubt the cash requirements of more than $10,000 created a problem for him. Hopefully he will sell enough Trump Steaks, Trump Perfume and Trump Dolls to save some money and buy a team. Then we can see how he does. Until then he is a wannabe that needs to get a new spiel."

That's great, guys. Really, just fascinating stuff. It's got all the intrigue and excitement of Brian Scalabrine arguing with Mark Madsen about who has the best sitting posture.

I wish Trump would keep his beefs outside of the sports world. I know that it's fun to get attention on television, and I know that you can get it easily by saying mean things about other celebrities ... but really, we have no shortage of people willing to call the Mavericks losers right now. Please find another talk show host to pick on.

The Donald In Basket-Brawl [New York Post]

It was not a good night to be a Dallas fan last night — it really hasn't been a good year to be a fan of any Dallas sports team — but it's really not a happy experience to be Dirk Nowitzki right now ... and it probably won't be for quite some time, writes True Hoop.

And now, instead of a champion, Nowitzki is only, until further notice, a pretender. I wonder how he'll feel, next week, when — most likely — he is summoned somewhere besides a Dallas home game to pick up the MVP trophy. It's a trophy he has earned. As much as he is in character fading from tough defensive schemes in these playoffs, he was also in character scoring 53 taking similar shots this time last year, and dominating all regular season long. The MVP is a regular season award, and this was his regular season.

But the more Nowitzki is lauded as the MVP, the more he is responsible for his team. And the more he is responsible for the team, the more he has disappointed. I wonder if that trophy will make him feel anything but worse. That little trophy, assuming he gets it, will be, in a perverse way, the precise reason someone somewhere is probably writing a column right now saying that Nowitzki should be traded. If this becomes the first MVP trophy ever to be tossed off a bridge, I won't wonder why.

And Mark Cuban remains silent.

The Spotlight Is Burning Dirk Nowitzki [True Hoop]
The City Of Dallas Is Experiencing One Of The Worst Sports Years Ever [WBRS Sports Blog]

• We Believe Upset!! I'd like to throw out mad love to our loyal GSoM community, Warriors Nation, and of course, my fellow GSoM writers for being together for so long to enjoy this moment. You deserve every bit of joy you get from this legendary series. Don't discount what you just saw tonight. We may have very well witnessed one of the most amazing sports moments we will ever see in our lives (besides the inevitable NBA Championship of course!) Savor it. We've earned it with many long hard years of loyalty and love. We earned it by being Warriors. [Golden State Of Mind]

• Go Mavs. I guess as Mavs blogger I'm supposed to have some huge post either passing out blame or delivering profound optimism. I won't be though. I refuse to join the millions of people who will be piling on my team the rest of the postseason, and I'm currently incapable of providing the second. All I can say is that it sucked. It's going to be a long offseason. And I can't wait until November for it to all start again. [Mavs Moneyball]

• Much Obliged. Now, if it's not too much trouble, go ahead and do away with Houston/Utah. [Pounding The Rock]

• I Believe Now. Years of season tickets and over $22k spent on Warriors tickets since 1995. 22k plus interest is a fat down payment on a used Porshe GT3. Averages out to over 7k per playoff game. Totally worth it. [Warriors World]

• The Dallas Mavericks Choked. It was amazing to see the Mavericks show no pride tonight and take the beating that the Golden State Warriors gave them! It was amazing to see owner Mark Cuban answering questions after the game with tears in his eyes as he probably came to realize that the coach he treated so badly was much better than the one he replaced him with. [Mavericks Locker]

• Mavericks Booted From The Playoffs. The Mavericks pulled maybe the biggest choke-job in the history of the NBA by losing in 6 games to the 8th-seed Golden State Warriors. But by saying it was a choke-job I don't give enough credit to the Warriors and Don Nelson. Nelson knew exactly what the Warriors needed to do to beat the Mavericks and they played it to perfection. Less important, but still fun to talk about, how are they going to present the MVP award if Dirk Nowitzki wins it now? Is there any way David Stern is going to go and switch the winner to Steve Nash so the NBA isn't embarrassed by having to present the MVP during halftime of some game the Mavericks aren't playing? [Bright Side Of The Sun]

Deadspin associate editor Rick Chandler was at the Oracle Arena in Oakland last night to watch the Golden State Warriors finish off the Dallas Mavericks. Here's his account of the experience.

All right! Uncle! I'll say I believe, but to be truthful it's all still quite remarkably unbelieveable, even now that it's over. Was that Stephen Jackson hitting seven 3-pointers? Was that Woody Harrelson sitting next to Snoop Dogg? Was that Baron Davis taking it to the hole on a pulled hammy? Was this the Bay Area's Kirk Gibson moment?

When Matt Barnes dunked in Dirk Nowitzki's grill with 2:15 remaining in the third, giving the Warriors an 80-57 lead, it suddenly dawned on us in the upper reaches of Section 217 that it would have been a bigger upset if Dallas had won this series. As a lifelong Warriors fan who has only heard stories of the former Glory Times — the '74-'75 NBA title run — this was delicious beyond belief. For the first time since 1991, the Warriors are thinking about the immediate future following a first-round playoff series. To put that into perspective, the final points of that series win over the Spurs were scored by Tom Tolbert.

Tom was seated a few rows below us on Thursday ... 42, to be exact. But his seats weren't as good as those of Kate Hudson and Owen Wilson, who were really into the game. Kate, in fact, did considerably more jumping than Nowitzki and had nearly as good a field goal percentage. Owen emoted far better than at any point in Wedding Crashers. At halftime I saw Ronnie Lott in the restroom, considered giving him the Larry David peek, but decided against it. As for the crowd, its the first time I've witnessed everyone standing for the entire second half of a pro sporting event. But there was an uncomfortable lull during the second quarter, just after Davis left with a pulled hamstring. It was odd seeing so many people wearing the same color t-shirt and sitting on their hands.

But then the third quarter arrived, The Beard was back and Oracle Arena began shaking once again.

Side note: The Warriors gave out "I Believe" signs on Thursday, which I noticed were sponsored by Comcast. For anyone who has made an appointment with that particular company to show up and hook up your cable, that slogan is really the only way to keep your spirits up.

At one time I was a newspaper beat reporter who covered the Oakland A's. On arriving for the game at the Coliseum one afternoon, I drove up to my customary parking spot to find an elephant in it, munching hay. The circus was in town and playing the adjacent Oakland Arena, which was what the Oracle was called at the time.

Up until yesterday, that was the biggest surprise I've had at that building. Note to the rest of the NBA: For the duration of the playoffs, the Warriors are now the elephant in the room.

Well, all right, kids, we think you probably agree with us when we say that if the Warriors can't clinch their series against the Mavericks in that Thunderdome, they're not likely to sneak out a Game 7 in Dallas. So tonight is, for all intents and purposes, the deciding game. And it's the biggest night in Golden State Warrior basketball since ... well, since further back than we can fathom.

To get a feel for how the Warriors faithful are holding up, we talked to the gang at Golden State Of Mind — Atma Brother #1, Hash and Fantasy Junkie — to get a feel how Warrior Nation felt going into tonight. Their responses after the jump ...

And enjoy the game — as well as the Jazz-Rockets matchup, no small bones itself. That place is going to burst into flames if Golden State wins.

(Getty Images photo)

—-—-—-—-—

OK, seriously ... are you guys shitting your pants? You're a game away from upsetting a team that won 67 games, and you haven't been to the playoffs in a decade.

Atma Brother #1: Just like I wrote in an article for The W Column before this great series began: "If you have nothing to lose, how can you possibly lose?"

Fantasy Junkie: Honestly, we wanted a matchup with the Mavs over any of the other playoff teams. Why? The record the last two years speaks for itself, 3-1 last year, 3-0 this year. Now we're 3-2 in the playoffs. The Warriors match up well with the Mavs, and we have the key ingredient, Don Nelson. It should only surprise those who don't follow the Warriors. We expected this to happen, and missing the playoffs the last 12 seasons just makes the players and fans hungrier and want this even more than any other team.

Hash: I'm absolutely shitting my pants. Right now the Warriors are in a situation that is considered to be too good to be true. To be one game away from eliminating a team with the sixth-best NBA record ever as well as be in a position to do something that has never been done in the history of NBA basketball makes me proud, but it also scares the hell out of me. Nothing short of a 30 point lead going into the fourth quarter tonight will keep me from having (yet another) heart attack.

Did you really see this coming? Be honest.

Atma Brother #1: Honestly? Hellnaw. Up until this season I thought there was an unwritten code in the NBA:

1) Manu Ginobili and Devin Harris will carry Vlade Divac and Derek Fisher's torch into the next decade as flopper extraordinaires.
2) Danny Ainge and Kevin McHale are the NBA's version of Dumb and Dumber.
3) The Warriors are banned from the playoffs for having the ridiculous moniker "Golden State".

Hash: It's tough to say yes to this question without sounding arrogant, but let's just say that we're probably not as shocked as someone who just started watching this Warriors ballclub. At the end of the regular season, I think all of us were praying for the chips to fall in favor of a Warrior/Mavs series. Simply put, we have the components to slow down the Mavericks. Tons of other teams have found ways around our game plan, but somehow, our exact style of play is a successful anti-Mavs formula. We were a threat to this team in the regular season, and all Mavs fans could say was, "This isn't the playoffs. It's a different game in the playoffs." Well, now this is the playoffs. The Warriors have already proven themselves to the GSoM faithful with their performance this season. Win or lose this series, the Warriors have now proved themselves to the rest of the world.

Has Baron Davis been playing like this all year? Because he kind of looks like the best player on the planet right now. And how long has he had that beard, anyway?

Atma Brother #1: When Boom Dizzle has been healthy this year, he's put up superstar numbers and performances. He was robbed of an All Star appearance this year despite 10 excellent reasons to send him to Vegas. Replace Steve Nash with Baron Davis, and the Phoenix Sunny Delight win the title this year hands down. A point guard who actually tries on defense? What a concept!

Hash: Baron has always been a beast, but his playoff performance has elevated him to Bigfoot status. Well ... his playoff performance plus his badass beard.

We don't remember the last time we saw an NBA team's fans go as crazy as you all have been these last few days. Has it always been like this? Or has it just been a crazed fan base waiting for something to scream about?

Atma Brother #1: There's just something about this sorry franchise that the good folks in the Bay Area just love and adore. Had the most inept owner in all of sports not owned this team for the past decade, this might be one of the top three most valued franchises in the NBA right now.

Hash: The GSoM and Warriors community have always been a crazed fan base waiting to pop. The playoff hype has contributed to some amazing new community members to the site, but even during the regular season, Warriors faithful have been living and dying on every game. I can't remember who said this but it was once said, "For a Warriors fan, every game is like Game 7 of the NBA Finals." For so many years, that's all that we ever had. The playoffs didn't make us crazy, they just allowed the rest of the world to see how crazy we actually are.

Any good Stephen Jackson stories from the road? Does he ghostride? We imagine he ghostrides.

Atma Brother #1: Well, we've all Nowitnessed Action Jackson ghostride Dirk this entire series. Let's just say Action Jackson's a character. He's that crazy cousin who's done some really dumb things in the past, but always has your back no matter what. You can't help but love a guy like that.

Fantasy Junkie: The best Stephen Jackson story that I've heard is the one where he told Charles Barkley why Dwyane Wade will never be in his Fave Five. It's because Wade will never replace Dominos, Pizza Hut, McDonalds, Jack in the Box and of course Krispy Kreme.

Admit it: You desperately miss Mike Dunleavy, Jr.

Atma Brother #1: Man, we've got 44 reasons why we miss Dunnuthin': Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV

Fantasy Junkie: The one thing that we really do miss about Dunleavy is the great pictures he would "pose" for during games. Our recaps of games are just not quite the same without the Dunleavy dogface or him getting kicked in the groin. He never ceased to amaze us with his uncanny ability to get a picture taken of him at the worst possible moment.

Hash: Like I miss hemorrhoids.

Do you worry about Don Nelson's health? His heart is just going to explode sometime.

Atma Brother #1: I'm more worried about the Warriors never making the playoffs again after Nellie retires. I guess I'm pretty worried about his rap career exploding after he leaves too.

Fantasy Junkie: His heart? I worry about his liver. Seriously, what other coach would show up to a postgame press conference with a Bud Light? I think the more he drinks, the better the Warriors play.

Hash: Nellie is immortal. The only thing I worry about is him subbing himself into the game and dropping 45 on the Mavs in a quarter. That, and seeing him in basketball shorts.

We're asking this just so you'll curse it: Whom do you want in the second round, Utah or Houston?

Atma Brother #1: What's this funny thing called the "second round" you speak of?

Fantasy Junkie: Hell, we were just happy to make the playoffs a couple weeks ago. Either team would be great, it doesn't matter. All we care about right now is winning the first round. Both Utah and Houston pose problems for the Warriors because they have tough big men who can score and rebound. Their big men don't get pushed around in the paint, are mentally tough, and can punish the Warriors down low. Also, both teams play excellent defense which will severely limit the run and gun style of the Warriors. It really doesn't matter who we face, but if I had a choice, I'd rather face Utah just because we blew them out the last time we played.

Hash: The Grizzlies.

You guys have been pretty bad for a while. What are some of the truly favorite embarrassing/humiliating Warrior fan moments that are making this success taste that much sweeter?

Atma Brother #1: I'd have to say missing out on Jordan and Pippen 2.0, but there's an infinite list of "All Time Great Moments in Warriors History".

Fantasy Junkie: Hmmmm, so many to choose from. My favorites are the missed draft picks. Joe Smith over Kevin Garnett. Todd Fuller over Kobe Bryant. Adonal Foyle over Tracy McGrady. Mike Dunleavy over Amare Stoudemire. Despite passing on all those franchise players and trading away a plethora of All-Star talent, we may just knock off the #1 team in the league and make a serious run in the playoffs.

Seriously ... they gonna pull this off? If they don't, what will it mean to Warrior fandom?

Atma Brother #1: No doubt the Dubs are going to pull this off. If they don't, Warriors Nation will still feel like we won the NBA Finals. I'm just happy that the 13 year curse is finally, finally over. Your Golden State Warriors- where mediocrity is considered excellence!

Fantasy Junkie: Yes.

Hash: At the risk of jinxing it, all I will say is that the Warriors are going to shock the world. Keep in mind that's a relatively safe bet, seeing as the world is already shocked that we're as far as we are in this series.

Anything else you want to add?

Atma Brother #1: To borrow a line from Warrior "legend" Marc Jackson during his rookie season after hitting a lay-up during a 29-point loss to the Dallas Mavericks' bench in 2000 — win or lose we're "Unstoppable baby!"

Hash: Just a shout out to the entire GSoM community. Behind every bandwagoner, there lies a GSoMer who has bled lightning bolts for years. They deserve all the joy they are getting out of this series.

We thought Bill Simmons' pregame breakdown of this series was rather dead-on — whatever criticism Simmons might receive, the guy knows his NBA — and until the last three minutes, you had to wonder if Dirk Nowitzki would retire post-game, because he clearly would be too ashamed to show his face in public again. And then ... he woke up, and a series that had, in just five games, covered just about every possible subplot added one more.

This is a series we desperately do not want to end, and we're already counting down the minutes — just 36 hours until it goes batshit crazy in Oakland again tomorrow night — until it fires back up again. That's too much time to wait. We suspect no matter what happens the rest of the way, this is the series from these NBA Playoffs that everyone will remember. And we're still only five games in.

Game 5: Warriors 112, Mavs 118 - We Got To Pray... [Golden State Of Mind]
Sorry, Dirk, You're No MVP [Bill Simmons]

Imagine the ramifications if, perchance, the Warriors eliminate the Mavericks tonight. First off, poor Dirk Nowitzki might never show his face in public again, or at least not around his coach. We'll have proof that the Warriors