Kevin Hart did it right: Buy into the dream that a big-time college is recruiting you, hold a huge press conference to announce your commitment, then have it revealed that the whole thing is a sham.

As high school seniors, we should all have been so lucky.

We should all have been ogled by skeevy grown men who drool over our 17-year-old "hip swivel" and text us day and night ("So R U Going 2 FSU?") when they aren't stalking us in our high school parking lot.

We should all be rated on a star system, one through five, even though unless your name is Vince Young, being a "5" usually no more guarantees ultimate success than being a "2." (Why do we never hear about "1-star" prospects?)

We should all be the subject of ugly rumors on message boards at web sites bought by Yahoo for $100 million. ($100 million! For a glorified message board!)

We should all get a series of YouTube clips that show only the greatest highlights of our potential, set to a soundtrack of Souljaboy, death metal or catchy Christian rock. (Screw Sam McGuffie: Where was the video of Big Daddy Drew as a high school senior, regaling classmates with dick jokes that flashed his future promise?)

We should all have enjoyed a Signing Day moment on ESPNews, putting on an ugly hat (Shocker: Haverford over Penn!) while mumbling thanks to mom and boasting of Econ stardom as a true freshman.

We should all enjoy being the center of a recruiting battle between Michigan and Ohio State that has bloggers like Brian Cook dissecting every sliver of new info... then ditching both schools for Penn State. (No, I have no special inside info about Terrelle Pryor. Stop emailing me, Coach Rodriguez.)

We should all be able to commit, de-commit, then re-commit to the college of our choice, with that college's faculty recruiters lapping our taint every step of the way.

We should all be able to use the phrase "strong lean" as it relates to our stress-addled teenaged mind's decision-making ability and have adults we have never met before spend more time parsing that phrase than they spent with their children that week.

We should all be part of an incoming freshman class that is ranked against every other freshman class in the country, then have that ranking debunked by everyone as being complete and utter bullshit.

(Oh, wait: Rivals and Scout rankings may be ridiculous, but U.S. News and World Report college rankings are still the unrivaled king.)

Kevin Hart knows, that's what Signing Day is really about: Inflated hopes, unfulfilled promise(s) and a bunch of sketchy-ass people telling you things you shouldn't believe, but do anyway. Hell, that's the entire college experience. (So who's going to let the kids in on THAT?)

As usual, send comments to danshanoff-[at]-gmail-[dot]-com.

Let me say this once and for all, to all the Ohio State fans out there:

Thankfully, mercifully, finally... S.T.F.U.

Dan Shanoff Is the Bandwagoneer

Stop yapping, stop emailing, stop commenting. After your season of bitching, we don't want to hear from you. Certainly not today. Let's throw in next year, too, as a penalty for last night's bed-shitting.

For the second straight year, your team has shown up in the national title game ranked No. 1, boasting the sport's "best" defense (at least on paper, which let's all agree was bullshit) and gotten shellacked.

After those consecutive personal-foul penalties that effectively ended the game, I actually had this thought, only half-sarcastically:

If Ohio State really wanted to win the national championship this season, the Buckeyes would have been better off turning down the BCS title game and playing USC in the Rose Bowl, hoping for a win against the Pac-10 and salvaging a split title. Because it's obvious this "winning a title outright against an SEC team" BCS Championship stuff doesn't really work for them.

Congratulations to LSU fans, on a championship performance so dominating that it made me think twice about yesterday's well-intended but half-cocked assertion that Georgia deserved a national title split.

And to Ohio State fans, I would say better luck next year, but the rest of college football fans would like you to stop wasting a slot in the national title game. Unbeaten? One-loss? Doesn't matter: Stick to the Rose Bowl. Give a chance to another team that might not suck... again.

This season's final Top 10 ballot:

1. LSU
2. Georgia
3. USC
4. Missouri
5. Kansas
6. West Virginia
7. Ohio State
8. Virginia Tech
9. Texas
10. Oklahoma

Split the Vote! Campaign: As you see above, even I backed down. But three AP voters picked Georgia as their champ. (One each picked USC and Kansas.)

There WAS one split... for No. 2: The AP picked Georgia; the coaches picked USC. Chalk it up as a moral victory for everyone.

Playoff Watch: There will be a ton of talk about the "Plus-One" idea this offseason. And the idea STILL sucks.

Consider its two manifestations, applied to this season:

(1) Match up the top two teams after the bowl season. OK, after watching all the bowls, who would you pick today? LSU and...

Georgia or USC? UGA was 2nd in the final AP poll. USC was runner-up in the final coaches' poll. It's intractable.

In a season as muddled as this one, the bowl season did nothing to clarify a single pair of teams ahead of the rest.

(2) Pick 4 teams and have them play in two "semifinal" bowls, with the winners advancing to a championship game.

Here are the four teams that would have likely been picked heading into this year's bowls: LSU, Ohio State, Virginia Tech and Oklahoma.

In hindsight, with bowl season to use as a litmus test, three — THREE — of those four choices now look ludicrous. USC, UGA and KU were clearly more "playoff-worthy" than OSU, VT and OU.

This season was frustrating to those who want some sort of playoff system, but here's what this season WAS good for: Exposing the flaws of the Plus-One concept.

Unless a Plus-One proponent can explain how it would work in a season as crazy as this one, the Plus-One is even more flawed than the current system.

In the end, almost every fan who watched the game last night can agree that LSU is the best team. USC lost at home to a 41-point underdog. Georgia didn't win its conference. Kansas played a flimsy schedule. Ohio State, Virginia Tech and Oklahoma all lost their bowls. Missouri couldn't even beat Oklahoma once in two tries.

Once the season played out to its very last game, there was a clear champ — or perhaps the least-flawed team, which in sports is often the same thing.

Looking ahead to 2008: Back in August, I predicted that the BCS would implode this season, because multiple teams would go unbeaten - not, of course, because NO teams would go unbeaten.

I was right in theory, wrong on the execution. I think we'll see a correction next season: College football will be top-heavy with some overwhelming powerhouses. The game of the year will be USC and Ohio State: The winner has the inside track on one of the spots in the national title game; the loser needs help.

The rest is a jumble: The survivor (if any) of Georgia, Florida and LSU in the SEC. The survivor (if any) of Texas, Missouri, Kansas and Oklahoma in the Big 12. And God help us if Ohio State makes it back into the national title game. Let's hope poll voters have finally learned their lesson about putting OSU there when there is any doubt about their viability. Ranking inflation — preseason or otherwise — based on "reputation" is an insult to fans, teams and the sport. Now let me undermine that...

Here's a preliminary 2008 preseason Top 10 ballot to keep you feeling warm and fuzzy until August — or at least Signing Day:

1. USC
2. Georgia
3. Florida
4. Texas
5. LSU
6. West Virginia
7. Ohio State
8. Missouri
9. Kansas
10. Virginia Tech

As usual, send all comments and questions to danshanoff-[at]-gmail-[dot]-com.

Split the national title! The campaign climaxes tonight: AP voters need to showcase the creativity and cojones to vote a deserving Georgia as No. 1, sharing the national title with the LSU-Ohio State winner.

For every reason there is to vote LSU (or OSU) at No. 1, Georgia has an equal case. ("Didn't win a conference title?" Meh: If they had the chance to play LSU in Atlanta, don't you think UGA would have won?)

If I was an AP voter, I wouldn't even need to watch tonight's game: I would have written in UGA as my No. 1 team as soon as they finished annihilating the most prolific offense in the country.

In this most clusterfuckish of seasons, a split champ — from the same conference, no less — would be as symbolic as it gets.

LSU-Ohio State Preview: At the very least, we know one team will win a national title tonight, but I think I've seen this movie before: Top-ranked Ohio State versus an SEC champ that critics seem to think hasn't won decisively enough.

Except as dominant as that Florida defense looked a year ago, this LSU defense is even better. And as dominant as that Ohio State offense seemed heading into last year's title game, this OSU offense isn't as good.

Still, you're hearing the same criticism of this LSU team that you heard about Florida a year ago: Too few decisive performances, too many close and "lucky" wins, blah blah blah... the next morning: Blowout.

The only reason an LSU win tonight won't be as big of a rout as last year is that OSU has last year's memory to ensure it comes into the game with less of a sense of entitlement: 30-13, LSU.

(I have added incentive to root for LSU: If the Tigers win, I will win the 239-player bowl pick 'em group I set up on ESPN.com. Never won anything in fantasy ever. Thank you, back-loaded "confidence points.")

Bowl Season Hangover: In advance of tonight's title game (or "title game," if you're supporting Georgia as national champ), let's romp through the highlights from the rest of the bowl season...

Bowl Season MVP: Chris Jesse. Only the step-son of a head coach (of a bowl-winning team) could get away with the douchebaggery of being called for touching a ball while it's on the field. Or was it the douchebaggery of Jesse's you-mean-that-wasn't-intended-as-ironic MySpace page? Either way: Well done. (Runner-up: Pat White)

Best Game: Capital One Bowl. Finally coaching with the freeing feeling of nothing to lose, Lloyd Carr loosened up to embrace the spread offense, giving the finger to his successor and all the doubters. Chad Henne had the best game of his endless career. Hart the Angry Dwarf backed up the talk, even if loose lips came with a loose grip. And, since you want to hear me say it: Florida fans were hating fucking life, thank you very much. (Runner-up: Motor City Bowl)

Biggest foreshadow: Kodi Burns is Auburn's Tim Tebow. You can keep your Booty or your Henne: By next season, every self-respecting team is going to have their own version of a dual-threat QB, either one guy to do the job (ie, Dan LeFevour and Pat White) or by committee (ie, Texas' McCoy and Chiles). Just wait until Terrelle Pryor... (Runner-up: Joe McKnight, who will vie with Devine, Maclin, Harvin and Benn as "biggest all-around threat" in 2008.)

Biggest winner? Big 12. Kansas completed a dream season. Missouri proved they were BCS-bowl-worthy. Texas positioned itself as a preseason Top 5 team in '08. Oklahoma State put up 49 behind Zac Robinson's 5 TDs. Texas Tech put up a 4th-quarter comeback for a win. Only Oklahoma really stunk it up, which makes the rest of the Big 12 happy, anyway. (Runner-up: West Virginia's Bill Stewart, who got a job out of the thing.)

Biggest loser? Hawaii. For everything Boise State did for non-BCS schools a year ago, Hawaii took it all back. The Warriors talked big heading into the game, then were silenced. There is a huge difference between "unbeaten" and "best," and Hawaii helped prove it. (Runner-up: Bob Stoops. Stop wasting the Big 12's BCS bowl slot.)

Biggest confusion: How the hell did West Virginia's offense sputter against lowly Pitt, when WVU so totally gave Oklahoma the shock-and-awe treatment? There's only one explanation: They were over-Rod-ded. (Runner-up: How can the BCS continue to justify limiting conferences to a maximum of 2 schools? Expand the BCS to include the Cotton Bowl, and allow each conference a 3rd team, if worthy.)

Finally, Biggest "What If?": Oregon would have been a hell of a national champ...

P.S.: For those of you who missed the Gelf interview I did last week that put my Florida fandom into perspective, I was asked about my analysis of the Deadspin Commenters. Here's how I articulated it:

It's like the people who call into Jim Rome or other sports-talk radio are like the "before" version of Charlie in "Flowers for Algernon ," when he was mentally challenged.

The Deadspin commenters are like the super-smart "post-drugs" version of Charlie — still fundamentally retarded, but riding a tide of brilliance — that's the daily commenting stream.

Self-aware retarded kids: I salute you.

Coming tomorrow: A title-game wrap-up, a final Top 10 for 2007 — and a look-ahead to 2008.

As usual, send any questions or comments to danshanoff-[at]-gmail-[dot]-com.

Nothing says "end-of-the-year" (or "MSG hangover") like a batch of fairly obvious, entirely shallow superlatives, representing the best and worst of 2007, with a baseless look-ahead to 2008. Feel free to add your own in the comments.

Biggest moment: App State beats Michigan
Biggest upset: Stanford beats USC
Biggest game, individual: Darren McFadden vs. LSU
Biggest "YouTube" clip: Trinity's "15 Laterals" to beat Millsaps
Biggest Cinderella: South Florida Kansas, Illinois (tie)
Biggest dud: Cal, Louisville (tie)
Biggest choke:: West Virginia at home vs. Pitt
Biggest symbolism, on-field: Navy beats Notre Dame
Biggest symbolism, off-field: I-AA teams in I-A Top 25 poll
Biggest trend: Deploying a QB who can run
Biggest scandal: FSU's mass bowl ineligibility
Biggest news-maker: Nick Saban
Biggest back-in: Ohio State
Biggest bandwagon: Tim Tebow

Plus 5 Predictions for 2008:
Biggest game: Ohio State at USC, Sept. 13
Biggest headline: "Plus-One" "playoff" "approved"
Biggest coaching opening: Notre Dame
Heisman Winner: Percy Harvin
BCS Championship Game: USC vs. Florida

Coming next week: Bowl hangover.

As usual, send any questions or comments to danshanoff-[at]-gmail-[dot]-com.

Bowl sponsors have fascinated me since their arrival was supposed to herald the end of the "classy" "pageantry" of college football's bowl season. (Riiight: It was all FedEx's fault.)

But sponsors have become as integral to the bowl experience as the games themselves. (Teams come and go, but Meineke Car Care is forever.)

Some bowls maintained their original classic name but tacked on a sponsor (AT&T Cotton); some bowls dropped the original name (Chick-fil-A ne Chick-fil-A Peach); some bowls are real-life parodies ("PapaJohns.com Bowl"); and one bowl even pretentiously added their sponsor to the END of the bowl name, thinking Purists Who Are Keeping Us From Having a Playoff might miss that it now shouts "Rose Bowl PRESENTED BY CITI, BITCHES."

And so my 2007 bowl preview is as much about the sponsors involved as the teams involved. Oh, sure, there is still a little about the games themselves, but just remember: Roady's Truck Stops puts the "Humanitarian" into the Humanitarian Bowl. (Don't forget to stop by the traveling exhibit of All-Time Truck-Stop Restrooms outside the stadium, for your chance at a glory-hole shot worth $1 million!)

With that image scorched in your mind, bowl capsules follow. (Picks in italics.)

12/20: Poinsettia (San Diego)
Utah vs. Navy
Title Sponsor: San Diego County Credit Union.
"Free bowl tickets with proof of SDCCU sub-prime mortgage foreclosure!"
Plus: Paul Johnson leaving Navy, obviously hates America.

12/21: New Orleans
Memphis vs. Florida Atlantic
Title Sponsor: R&L Carriers
"I want a playoff... of the nation's top trucker-servicing hookers."
Plus: Memphis fans waiting on Final Four.

12/22: PapaJohns.com (Birmingham)
Southern Miss vs. Cincinnati
Title Sponsor: Eponymous
"Delivery in 30 minutes or less or your next bowl is free!"
Plus: Way better name? The "Buddy Garrity Bowl."

12/22: New Mexico (Albuquerque)
Nevada vs. New Mexico
Title Sponsor: Eponymous
"But it's a dry heat. (That's what your momma said!)"
Plus: UNM enjoys home-bowl advantage.

12/22: Las Vegas
UCLA vs. BYU
Title Sponsor: Pioneer
"Why go to the game when you can watch on a sick new HD TV?"
Plus: Um, does UCLA even have a coach for the game?

12/23: Hawaii (Honolulu)
Boise State vs. East Carolina
Title Sponsor: Sheraton
"What: Like you can afford the Four Seasons?"
Plus: Boise quickly learns this ain't the BCS.

12/26: Motor City (Detroit)
Purdue vs. Central Michigan
Title Sponsor: None
"Hard to believe it didn't become the 'Toyota Motor City Bowl.'"
Plus: Big Ten Nth place vs. MAC champ... thrilling!

12/27: Holiday (San Diego)
Arizona State vs. Texas
Title Sponsor: Pacific Life
"Apparently, ASU didn't take out insurance on losing the Pac-10."
Plus: Texas takes first step to Top 3 season in '08.

12/28: Champs Sports (Orlando)
Boston College vs. Michigan State
Title Sponsor: Eponymous
"Begging the question: 'Champs' of what, exactly?"
Plus: That Matt Ryan sure looked Heismanesque watching the Heisman Ceremony on TV from home.

12/28: Texas (Houston)
TCU vs. Houston
Title Sponsor: None
"What every fan wants to hear: On the NFL Network!"
Plus: Lucky for TCU and Houston fans, game is local.

12/28: Emerald (San Francisco)
Maryland vs. Oregon State
Sponsor: Eponymous
"Guess the number of almonds you can fit in Friedgen's pants!"
Plus: Beavers' bowl game was season-breaking win over Cal.

12/29: Meineke Car Care (Charlotte)
UConn vs. Wake Forest
Title Sponsor: Eponymous
"You're not going to pay a lot for these naming rights!"
Plus: 10 years ago, who saw THIS pairing coming?

12/29: Liberty (Memphis)
Central Florida vs. Mississippi State
Title Sponsor: AutoZone
"Because nothing bellows 'Liberty' like car parts!"
Plus: How can you root against Sylvester Croom?

12/29: Alamo (San Antonio)
Penn State vs. Texas A&M
Title Sponsor: Valero
"'Valero Alamo' is the porn-star name of FedEx Orange."
Plus: Dennis Franchione will email you all about it.

12/30: Independence (Shreveport)
Alabama vs. Colorado
Title Sponsor: PetroSun
"Just as long as you don't mean ENERGY independence."
Plus: Nick Saban said he was excited, but then he wasn't.

12/31: Armed Forces (Forth Worth)
Cal vs. Air Force
Title Sponsor: Bell Helicopter
"Do you REALLY want to talk shit about a gunship?"
Plus: Remember when Cal was poised to ascend to No. 1?

12/31: Humanitarian (Boise)
Georgia Tech vs. Fresno State
Title Sponsor: Roady's
"Stick one in the Roady's Truck Stops glory hole for $1 million!"
Plus: When you think 'destination bowl game,' think Idaho!

12/31: Sun (El Paso)
South Florida vs. Oregon
Title Sponsor: Brut
"El Paso + cheap cologne = October 1 baby-birth surge"
Plus: Remember when this could have been our title game?

12/31: Music City (Nashville)
Kentucky vs. Florida State
Title Sponsor: Gaylord Hotels
"Hotel of choice for FSU boosters and their mistresses."
Plus: Last chance to see pre-NFL Andre Woodson.

12/31: Insight (Tempe)
Indiana vs. Oklahoma State
Title Sponsor: Eponymous
"'I'm a man! I'm 40!' wins CFB Insight of the Year."
Plus: Say a quick prayer for IU's late Coach Hep.

12/31: Chick-fil-A (Atlanta)
Clemson vs. Auburn
Title Sponsor: Eponymous
"Expect spooky-looking cows with signs saying 'Eat Mor Tigr'"
Plus: Really, was "Peach Bowl" so bad?

1/1: Outback (Tampa)
Wisconsin vs. Tennessee
Title Sponsor: Eponymous
"Now, if they played Aussie rules football, they'd have something."
Plus: Phil Fulmer is one barbied filet away from angioplasty.

1/1: Cotton (Dallas)
Missouri vs. Arkansas
Title Sponsor: AT&T
"I want an iPhone made for Verizon, god dammit."
Plus: Darren McFadden AND Chase Daniel? (Drool noise.)

1/1: Gator (Jacksonville)
Texas Tech vs. Virginia
Title Sponsor: Konica Minolta
"Reminder to self: Call the guy to fix the office copier tomorrow."
Plus: Mike Leach in... Pirates of the Caribbean 4?

1/1: Capital One (Orlando)
Florida vs. Michigan
Title Sponsor: Eponymous
"Not to be awkward, but when does the new coach get here?"
Plus: No, seriously. Rod Era can't start fast enough.

1/1: Rose (Pasadena)
USC vs. Illinois
Title Sponsor: Citi
"Saying 'Presented by' doesn't make it less of a sell-out."
Plus: (Zook in Pasadena. I'm still in disbelief.)

1/1: Sugar (New Orleans)
Georgia vs. Hawaii
Title Sponsor: Allstate
"The only bowl game actually featuring an undefeated team."
Plus: Boise-Oklahoma, Part 2? Don't think so.

1/2: Fiesta (Phoenix)
Oklahoma vs. West Virginia
Title Sponsor: Tostitos
"Did you know the inventor of Tostitos is Swedish?*"
Plus: * - Not true.

1/3: Orange (Miami)
Virginia Tech vs. Kansas
Title Sponsor: FedEx
"What can Orange do for you? (Not much, actually.)"
Plus: Which neck draws the bigger reaction from the non-fans in your house who happen to walk by the TV: Mangino's or Beamer's?

1/5: International (Toronto)
Rutgers vs. Ball State
Title Sponsor: None
"Like Boxing Day, a Canadian event no one in America cares about."
Plus: Why is a mid-December-quality bowl game on in January?

1/6: GMAC (Mobile)
Bowling Green vs. Tulsa
Title Sponsor: Eponymous
"I want a playoff... to find the best financial services company!"
Plus: Championship Eve and we couldn't do better?

1/7: BCS Championship Game (New Orleans)
LSU vs. Ohio State
Title Sponsor: Allstate
"Home of the least satisfying championship result ever!"
Plus: And yet, a champ is what we'll get.

Wishing you and your family a very happy holiday (or Chinese-food-and-a-movie, if that's your persuasion). Catch you next week for the Bandwagoneer End-of-Year Awards.

As usual, send any comments or questions to danshanoff-[at]-gmail-[dot]-com.

So I'm sitting there watching the 1-AA playoffs, at the same time going over all these various (and ludicrously unrealistic) "But mine would work!" playoff plans being put out there, all while keeping an ominous eye on this "Plus-One" plan.

(You know the "Plus-One." Tagline: "The Solution That Wouldn't Solve Anything.")

Except every time you read about the "Plus-One" (or any other playoff idea), you read about some allergic, threatening reaction from the Rose Bowl or its bitch, the Pac-10, or the Pac-10's bottom, the Big Ten.

A playoff system — "Plus-One" or otherwise — will never happen with that tradition-stifled cabal holding it hostage. And so I was struck by the most realistic and effective solution to the playoff problem:

Let's create a playoff system WITHOUT the Rose Bowl, the Pac-10 and the Big Ten. Everyone else — enthusiastic and ready to create a playoff system — joins the "Coalition of the Winning."

Let the stodgy Pac-10 and Big Ten stick by the Rose Bowl (and maintain their arrogant and hypocritical rejection of a playoff) and exclude them from the new system; that's their choice.

But just let them try to claim a share of the national title without access to the 4-, 8- or even 16-team playoff that everyone else will be engaged in. Let a 12-0 USC or Ohio State watch helplessly as the rest of the country rallies around the playoff champion.

Let USC or Ohio State or Michigan try to recruit the best players in the country nationally while answering recruits' concerns about not getting to play for the national championship.

Let the other four power conferences (plus any non-BCS conference that wants in) share in the insane revenue created from the playoff system, generating more money for the non-BCS conferences, even more money for the power conferences — and further sending the Pac-10 and Big Ten into self-selected irrelevancy.

Let every participating conference be required to have a conference championship game, which both equalizes the competitive balance and generates even more revenue. If everyone is doing it, no one has an advantage.

Let a conference have as many teams play in the playoff system as they can qualify, and not artificially restrict them to two, as the current BCS system demands.

Let the conferences and university presidents and TV networks who all see the value in a playoff system win the day. (Don't wait for the Pac-10 and Big Ten to pout or threaten; simply create the new system, open to anyone who wants to join.)

Let the conferences and university presidents and everyone else who doesn't want to be included make the case to their fans that they are rejecting being part of college football's championship playoff.

Join me in saying...

"Fuck the Rose Bowl:" If they want to continue to isolate themselves from what fans and players and coaches and alumni really want, let 'em.

"Fuck the Pac-10 and Big Ten:" If they think they are so much more special than the rest of the country, call their bluff.

"Fuck 'tradition:'" It's why we're in this mess to begin with. Only a non-traditional (or tradition-rejecting) solution will work here.

If we want a playoff, let's just make one — with teams that actually want to be in one. If you don't want to be a part of it, don't be.

Just don't gripe when you realize what you missed out on.

Tim Tebow is Superman American Idol Heisman Winner: Remember the first edition of this guest-post, when I named it "Dan Shanoff Is the Tebow?" I felt self-conscious, so I changed "Tebow" to "Bandwagoneer," which was OK, right up until Saturday. I want my old name back, damn it.

Michael David Smith at CollegeFootballTalk posited on Saturday night that by the time Tebow is finished with college football, two years from now, he could very well be considered the best player of all time.

It's hard to argue: No sophomore — and few players ever, regardless of class — have ever put together the resume Tebow already has: Most Valuable Offensive Player on a national champ and a Heisman season defined by unprecedented numbers for a college football quarterback.

To really help his case that he is one of the greatest ever, Tebow will need to lead Florida to a national title, win another Heisman Trophy — or both. Possible, but improbable: Just ask Matt Leinart.

(Speaking of Heisman, when the quote-unquote "Heisman Trust" finally decides to strip Reggie Bush of his Heisman Trophy, I hope they will do the right thing and give the award to Vince Young, who was Bush's runner-up and who in hindsight was the best player that season.)

Handicapping the 2008 contenders, in this order: Tim Tebow; Pat White; Percy Harvin; Chase Daniel; Colt McCoy.

College Football's REAL Playoff System: It's called 1-AA. (Actually, it's called "Football Championship Subdivision" which wins the award for the worst branding re-launch in college sports history.)

What fascinates me about the 1-AA playoffs (aside from the fact that, mercifully, it IS a playoff) is that for all the griping by college football fans about wanting a playoff system in 1-A, no one outside of fans of 1-AA teams actually seems to give a shit about the 1-AA playoffs.

That's a shame: Appalachian State is on its way to an unprecedented third straight national title. (Remember App State? They only kicked off this craziest season ever by beating Michigan in Ann Arbor. In hindsight, we should have seen it as the foreshadowing of the insanity to come, rather than simply hyperbolizing it as the Upset of the Century.)

And, in their semifinal win over Richmond, App State QB Armanti Edwards put on what was arguably the finest individual performance in college football this season — at any level: a 1-AA record for rushing by a QB 313 yards (with 4 TDs), throwing for 182 yards and 3 TDs just to confirm what a badass he is. He's like the 1-AA Tim Tebow.

Anyway, App State plays Delaware for the title this Friday night in a must-see game for any real college football fan:

You can not care at all about 1-AA but still appreciate the culmination of the playoff system you wish you had, witness a college football three-peat, watch perhaps the most electrifying player in college football and pay tribute to the team that started this season's craziness.

Coming Next Monday: The Bandwagoneer Bowl Preview

As usual, send any questions or comments to danshanoff-[at]-gmail-[dot]-com.

While everyone is griping about the BCS, you know what is unsatisfying? Complaining about the BCS system the day after the bowls are set.

Complaining about Ohio State and "backing into" the national title game. Complaining about LSU being picked over a half-dozen other contenders. Complaining that there's no playoff. Yeah, yeah: It's a broken system; I'm no apologist. But here's my new campaign:

Stop snitching bitching.

What's the point of griping about it now? Particularly now that we have left the 24-hour frenzy of arguments that happen between the end of the regular season late Saturday night and the BCS reveal on Sunday night, it's just not worth it.

Yes, the system is exposed worse than ever (although the most aggrieved fan in 2007 would be hard-pressed to top the screw-job suffered by Auburn fans a few years back), but you certainly ain't changing it with your whining.

Ohio State and LSU may or may not be most worthy, but — and this is hardly perfect — every other contender is somehow LESS worthy:

Oklahoma has "worse losses"; Georgia didn't even play for (let alone win) LSU's conference title; USC had the single-worst defeat of the season; Virginia Tech lost to LSU head-to-head by 400; Kansas couldn't beat the team who couldn't beat Oklahoma; Hawaii played their schedule.

Given the discontent, let's quickly foreshadow the chance of a split national title if (when) LSU beats Ohio State, and the AP decides they would like to prove their relevancy by anointing an alternative champ.

If there's one legit gripe about the current BCS system, it's these counter-productive conference bowl-alignment requirements, which limit our ability to see, say, AP No. 3 (Oklahoma) vs. AP No. 4 (Georgia), with the winner earning the AP's share of the national title.

It will be a lot harder for the Sooners or Bulldogs or Hokies or Trojans to make that claim for a share of No. 1 when they are playing West Virginia (ranked 11th) or Hawaii (10th) or Kansas (8th) or Illinois (13th). So a split is a stretch.

There is one intriguing BCS scenario one of my blog commenters pointed out: What if Hawaii just throttles Georgia?

Given the way many — including me — consider UGA the best team in the country right now, wouldn't a sudden contrarian surge of AP support for Hawaii as champ put the perfect cap on this most imperfect of seasons?

Regardless, in this lull between the end of the regular season and the start of bowl season, can we just take a second to stop bitching about how fucked up the system is or how unfair the selections were — and appreciate that this was by far the most fascinating, unpredictable and thrilling college football season of our generation?

From the first week's "Upset of the Century" by App State over Michigan to this last week's shoulda-seen-it-coming bank-shot losses by both Top 2 teams, there has been nothing to complain about.

Except for some, the complaint is its ending.

For me, the complaint is it's ending.

This Week's Bandwagon: Who Is the Best Player? The most iconic individual award in sports will be given out next Saturday, and if we're all lucky, Tim Tebow will win — not (just) because he is the best player in college football but because he will end the tyranny of the previously impenetrable voter bias against sophomores.

With that inexplicable taboo eroded, we can actually focus on honoring the best player in the sport, regardless of age. (Meanwhile: Can I assume that as that "Top 25 Greatest College Football Players of All Time" countdown winds down, we'll find that Tim Tebow surprisingly ends up in the Top 3? OK: I'll settle for seeing him there after 2008.)

(My final ballot: (1) Tebow (2) McFadden (3) Brennan.)

This Week's BlogPoll Ballot Top 10
1. Georgia
Hawaii? UGA couldn't even get WVU or Kansas?
2. LSU
Miles will beat OSU, just not for Michigan.
3. Oklahoma
Start lobbying the AP voters now, OU fans.
4. USC
2007: "How Stanford Ruined a Championship."
5. Ohio State
No. 1? Needs "By Default" asterisk.
6. Florida
God damn you, clutch Auburn kicker.
7. Virginia Tech
Only 6 spots from my preseason pick.
8. Missouri
As long as they're not playing OU.
9. Illinois
Ron Zook in Pasadena: Amazing.
10. Kansas
Mark Mangino: Coach of the Year.

And so, in the fictional universe where my rankings reign supreme, here's the BCS bowl lineup I would have liked to have seen (but don't call it "bitching"):

National title: LSU vs. Georgia. Matches the "best-body-of-work" qualifier vs. the "hottest-top-team-at-end-of-season" qualifier.

(If you want a playoff, you want to see a team that didn't even PLAY for its conference title play for the national championship.)

Rose: USC vs. Ohio State. Let the teams too pussified to play a conference title game enjoy their precious little no-stakes bowl.

Sugar: Florida vs. Illinois. Screw the BCS' "two-team limit" per conference. Because Zook against Tebow in New Orleans sounds awesome.

Fiesta: Oklahoma vs. Kansas. The Big 12 showdown we're all intrigued to see. Bonus: Winner gets the AP half of the national title.

Orange: Virginia Tech vs. Hawaii. Stick the "sympathy vote" teams together No: I am not COMPARING VT sympathy to Hawaii sympathy.

(Yes, I left out West Virginia, as a penalty for gagging the worst choke of the year AND for ruining my prediction from last week.)

Given how utterly wrong I was about my WVU-over-Pitt pick, it is of nominal consolation to me that my preseason pick of Virginia Tech as national champs was in line with the BCS computers' final regular-season results, which had VT ranked No. 1.

Coming next week: A realistic playoff system we can all agree on!

And in two weeks: The Bandwagoneer Bowl Preview!

As usual, send any comments, observations or complaints to danshanoff-[at]-gmail-[dot]-com.

The wildest — and best — college football season in modern history is down to a simple set of "ifs":

If Missouri beats Oklahoma, Mizzou will be in the national title game and no one will have a gripe.

If West Virginia beats Pitt, WVU will be in the national title game and no one (outside of Ohio) will have a gripe.

If Mizzou loses, Ohio State will be in the national title game and no one (outside of Kansas) will have a gripe.

If BOTH Missouri and West Virginia lose... well, that's just not happening.

Did you see what West Virginia did to the next-best team in their conference, when WVU realized they had to impress the nation? They hung 66 on them.

They ran up the score, because they knew they had to, in order to silence any doubt spread from, say, Columbus. Those 'Eers are one cut-throat bunch of s.o.b.'s; they ain't losing to Dave Wannstedt with a trip to the national championship game on the line.

All this clarity thanks to LSU, who a week ago I couldn't even fathom losing, losing. Not just losing, but losing at home to a 4-loss, one-man team. (Now, that one man happened to put on what I considered to be arguably the greatest individual performance in college football in the last decade. But, still: Just one guy, visiting Baton Rouge, against the No. 1 team in the country.)

Here's the thing that defies the week-in, week-out insanity of the regular season that sadly ends this coming Saturday: There is really no controversy to its conclusion.

Missouri-West Virginia? Sure, it sounds a little strange, but I'll take a championship game with two of the most exciting offenses and an over-under of 90 combined points. No debate.

West Virginia-Ohio State? Sure, OSU would back their way in, but what would be a more fitting end to this season than to see the regular season's last No. 1 team lose in the final game? No debate.

What's that? What happens when I'm totally wrong — as I was about LSU a week ago? When Mizzou and West Virginia BOTH lose? When we're left with Ohio State and a scrum between a half-dozen (barely) worthy teams that would cap what has otherwise been a blissfully anarchy-fueled season?

It all depends on which team is elevated to the No. 2 spot. They all have their flaws. For the sake of the exercise, let's project Ohio State versus...

Georgia: If you want to pick the next-best team.
BUT: Didn't even play for its conference title.
Oklahoma: If you want the team that beat No. 1.
BUT: Lost to not one but TWO unranked teams.
Kansas: If you want the next-best 1-loss team.
BUT: Didn't even play for its conference title.
LSU: If you want to give a team a 3rd chance.
BUT: Couldn't win at home when it mattered most.
USC: If you want the biggest "name" available.
BUT: Stanford. 41-point underdog. In L.A.
Florida: If you want to see Ohio State lose the game.
BUT: 3 losses?! Ha: That's ludicrous, even for me.
Hawaii: If you want the nation's only unbeaten team.
BUT: It would make a mockery of the sport.

More Notes from This Weekend: Although we should agree that Hawaii is not one of the Top 12 teams, I really like seeing a non-BCS team crash the BCS cabal ... After last week's debate over Michigan, can we all agree that Nebraska is not among the Top 5 coaching jobs in college football? ... I can't see how Texas A&M fans will be enthusiastic about Mike Sherman ... Why should the Heisman ceremony be forced to leave one of the Top 4 (McFadden, Tebow, Daniel, White) at home? Expand the invites to "However many are worthy" ... This week's "Notre Dame should have hired": Sylvester Croom ...

Bowl Clusterf*** Series Update: Who will get the coveted (and lucrative) "at-large" BCS bowl invites? If Hawaii can beat Washington, they are a lock for an invite through the non-BCS "Top 12" clause. Meanwhile, if Ohio State DOES go to the national-title game, will the Rose Bowl have the moxie to pick Illinois as the replacement, maintaining the integrity of the Rose's traditional "Pac-10/Big Ten" orientation?

This Week's Bandwagon: Defending conference-title games. Sure, they can wreck your chances at playing for the national title at the last minute (see Missouri if they lose to Oklahoma), but here is the flip side:

If Ohio State was playing in a Big Ten championship game this coming weekend, even in a down year for the conference, they wouldn't have to scoreboard-watch from home, trading in "scarlet and grey" for "crimson and cream." They likely would have given both West Virginia and Missouri a legit challenge.

Sure, if Missouri loses and Ohio State backs into a national-title appearance, it seems like a winning strategy to have their season end two weeks before everyone else. But, otherwise, it's a lost opportunity for Ohio State and the Big Ten.

This Week's BlogPoll Ballot Top 10
1. Missouri
Admit you NEVER saw this coming.
2. West Virginia
Pat White is Tebow's "Mini-Me."
3. Ohio State
Dropping the "S" to root for OU.
4. Kansas
KU could beat the Buckeyes, I think.
5. Georgia
SEC's best not playing for SEC title.
6. LSU
Fool me twice: Shame on me.
7. Virginia Tech
ACC's best? Eh: Nothing to brag about.
8. Florida
Where was this dominance in October?
9. USC
Still lost at home to Stanford.
10. Illinois
Say it: 2008 Rose Bowl.

Click here for my complete BlogPoll ballot.

This Week's Games to Watch:
Missouri vs. Oklahoma: (Big 12 C.G.) Much as I'd like to see yet another No. 1 lose, "Mizzou playing for a national title" is crazy enough, thanks.
Pick: Missouri

Pitt at West Virginia: Prep your couches early for the post-game pyrotechnics show.
Pick: West Virginia

LSU vs. Tennessee: (SEC C.G.) This went from LSU's BCS coronation to a debate whether the best team in the SEC is watching this game from home.
Pick: LSU

Virginia Tech vs. BC: (ACC C.G.) There will be no miraculous Matt Ryan comebacks this time. The BCS was the Hokies' destiny.
Pick: VT

UCLA at USC: Somehow, I think that USC won't choke away this game like they did a year ago. Too bad it's only for a Rose invite.
Pick: USC

Ohio State vs... (Big Ten Championship Game)
Nevermind.

As usual, send any comments or questions to danshanoff-[at]-gmail-[dot]-com.

For a season as clusterf—-ish as this one has been, the irony is that we seem to be heading for a blandly straightforward finish. Supporting my original theory that college football's regular season is a de facto playoff system held over 14 weeks, merely four realistic contenders remain with two weeks to go:

LSU: All they have to do is beat Arkansas at home, then beat the SEC East winner (Tennessee if they are lucky; Georgia if they aren't). Despite a few close calls for the Tigers this season, it isn't unreasonable to consider them as close to a lock for the national-title game as there can be this season.

Kansas-Missouri winner: Simple enough. Win next week, then beat the Big 12 South winner (Oklahoma if they are lucky; Texas if they aren't.) If the KU-MU winner wins the Big 12 title, no one will question their worthiness to play in the national championship.

Barring the unexpected, everyone can agree that LSU vs. "KU/MU-survivor" would be the most worthy title-game match-up. Of course, the unexpected is the norm this season...

What happens if the KU/MU winner loses in the Big 12 title game (possible, probable or inevitable — depending on your rooting interests) or LSU improbably loses in the SEC title game?

West Virginia will capitalize, jumping into the Top 2. All the 'Eers have to do is beat UConn in Morgantown next Saturday, then stay home to beat Pittsburgh the following week, while shipping a few couch-burners to San Antonio to root for the Big 12 South champ.

And though it may shock you to see me promote this, Ohio State holds the final claim, though the Buckeyes need help:

If West Virginia loses either of its final two games AND the KU/MU winner loses in the Big 12 title game a week later, Ohio State would deserve to play for the national title. (After last year's debacle, it would be refreshing to see the Big Ten's downtime before the end of everyone else's season actually work FOR the conference this time.)

Stranger shit has happened: Remember last season when USC was a mortal lock for the BCS title game against Ohio State ... right up until the Trojans choked to unranked UCLA. It shouldn't shock anyone to end up with West Virginia and Ohio State in the national title game.

There are only two weeks to go and everything seems so clear (for once)... if you consider everything we have seen this season, a predictable finish would be the wackiest result yet.

More notes from this weekend: Which previously hot team has tanked worse: Cal, which is a loss away from .500, or Alabama, which lost to Louisiana-Monroe en route to dropping three straight?... You can think Tim Tebow more "Hypeman" than "Heisman" and still appreciate his "20/20": Becoming the first player to run and throw for 20 TDs each in a single season ... You know it's the Worst. Season. Ever. at Notre Dame when "Well, at least we beat Duke" is the season highlight ... Here's to a healthy recovery for Dennis Dixon.

This Week's Bandwagon: Who's next at Michigan? The real intrigue in this story isn't who replaces Lloyd Carr, but when it happens.

Les Miles is in the awkward position of spending the next six weeks trying to win a national title at LSU, when his dream job is suddenly open and with him as the presumptive fan favorite for the job. Geaux... Big Blue?

This can't end well: Either (1) Miles is leaving and LSU fans, in blindly lustful pursuit of a national title, leave their self-respect at the door for the next six weeks, putting up with a lame-duck coach ready to abandon a perennial contender for a Northern has-been...

... Or (2) Miles stays at LSU, and Michigan painfully ends the self-delusion that it is one of the Top 5 coaching jobs in college football, the same delusion that seems to drive Maize & Blue Nation's necromantic fetish for hiring a "Michigan man" in the first place.

(From the scuttlebutt, it sounds like the timing of Carr's resignation is meant to pressure Michigan not to pursue Miles. Internal tension = more interest!)

Bowl Clusterf*** Series Update: With virtual clarity over the title game situation, the interesting scenarios become which teams will get picked up as "at-large" picks. Human voters might force a non-BCS team into the mix, artificially inflating the ranking of the Hawaii-Boise winner to ensure they make a BCS bowl (which would be a shame). The bigger question is whether a "name brand" team like USC, Texas or Florida vaults more qualified teams. Prediction: At least one will.

This Week's BlogPoll Ballot Top 10

1. LSU
Will Miles-to-Michigan distract?
2. Kansas
Miracle ending two long games away.
3. Missouri
Daniel/Maclin > Tebow/Harvin
4. West Virginia
Better not look past UConn.
5. Ohio State
Yes: Back in the BCS picture.
6. Georgia
Shut out of SEC East title?
7. Virginia Tech
Would love rematch vs. BC
8. Florida
Must settle for Tebow's Heisman.
9. Texas
UT fans rooting for Okie St.
10. Illinois
Dare to dream: BCS at-large bid?

Click here for my complete ballot.

Looking Ahead to Next Week:

The question is: Which of the handful of teams still alive for the BCS title game will be KO'ed? We know at least one will be ...

Missouri vs. Kansas (Saturday): I would say that a de facto national playoff quarterfinal qualifies as the latest incarnation of Game of the Year. If only the Kansas AD didn't pimp KU's "home" rights to this game to play it elsewhere.
Pick: Missouri

UConn at West Virginia (Saturday): It's a play-in game for the Big East's automatic BCS bid. Will WVU get caught scoreboard-watching?
Pick: WVU

Boise State at Hawaii (Friday): Hopefully, we can end this travesty that Hawaii is even remotely in the BCS conversation.
Pick: Boise State.

Virginia Tech at Virginia (Saturday): A rivalry game that doubles as a play-in for the ACC title game vs. B.C.
Pick: Virginia Tech

USC at Arizona State (Thursday): Who would have thought that USC could play the spoiler in the Pac-10?
Pick: USC

Arkansas at LSU (Friday): LSU is playing not to lose, literally, either this week or next in the SEC title game.
Pick: LSU

As usual, direct any comments, questions or criticism to danshanoff-[at]-gmail-[dot]-com.

For some reason, the angry emails from Ohio State fans have dried up, sort of like the Ohio Stadium scoreboard clock in the 4th quarter. But I'm not here to gloat or say "Told you so" about the Buckeyes ... well, not really.

Obviously, I can't now take back any of what I have said previously about how overrated the Buckeyes have been, but there is one thing I would like to take back, from a post earlier this season — that first insane Saturday of upsets throughout the Top 10:

"For fans of a team like Illinois, an unexpected win over a ranked team like Penn State is, in its temporary way, as sweet as winning a championship."

That's still true (infinitely more so in beating Ohio State in Columbus), but in the topsy-turvy six weeks since then, expectations for the have-nots and also-rans can — and should — have changed:

• Sylvester Croom took over the worst program in the SEC and four years later is bowl-eligible, beating Auburn, Alabama and Kentucky along the way this season — something even LSU can't claim.

• Ron Zook took over the worst program in the Big Ten and three years later has the Illini winning in Columbus and on track for a New Year's Day bowl game.

• Mark Mangino took over the worst program in the Big 12 and has them playing more successfully than they have since the 19th century, with a legitimate shot at the national-title game.

The common factor: Brutal programs mired in vicious cycles of ineptitude not only reversing them under the toughest of circumstances, but actually excelling — and in short order.

Vision matters (Croom). Recruiting matters (Zook). Scheme matters (Mangino). But whatever the root causes of turnarounds: Thanks to what we have seen this season, fans of other programs — from the downtrodden to the mediocre to the best — all have the right to demand Croom/Zook/Mangino-style results.

Going back to that original point six weeks ago, your bar could be simple bowl-eligibility, the thrill of New Year's Day relevance or just a wild once-in-a-lifetime ride to the top of the BCS, but if this season has taught us nothing else, it's that your team should have just as good of a shot as anyone.

The slogan is simple: "Why not us, too?"

So take heart, Notre Dame faithful: Your epically terrible 1-win, 9-loss mockery of a football program is positioned perfectly for a "Cranginook"-style turnaround.

Just think of that, Irish fans: If you are extremely lucky, you can aspire to be Illinois, Mississippi State or Kansas.

At the very least, you should demand as much.

Bowl Clusterf*** Series Update: Despite finally elevating into the Top 2, Oregon is in trouble, and you can see it coming:

Provided that Kansas goes into its game against Missouri unbeaten (and Mizzou still has only that one loss, at Oklahoma) and Oklahoma maintains a single loss until the Big 12 title game, the winner of that game will deserve — and probably get, from human pollsters and certainly the computer polls — the "conference championship game bump" ahead of Oregon, much like Florida did over Michigan a year ago.

As they should.

Leagues with a conference-title game deserve that bonus when all other factors are equal, commensurate with the extra risk they put their top BCS-contenders through by even playing a conference title game.

Given the remaining schedules of LSU, Oregon and the Big 12 title-game winner, the Ducks look like the odd team out, even though they might not lose between now and BCS Selection Day.

Maybe at that point, the Pac-10 will lose their notorious self-righteous indignation toward conference title games. (Either that, or secede from the BCS entirely.)

This Week's BlogPoll Ballot Top 10
1. Kansas
All they have to do is keep winning.
2. LSU
SEC title game will clinch for them.
3. Oregon
BCS shut-out is foreshadowed
4. Oklahoma
Looking ahead to Big 12 title game?
5. Missouri
Could beat Sooners on neutral field.
6. West Virginia
Jumped by Big 12 impressiveness.
7. Georgia
Best 2-loss team in the nation.
8. Ohio State
Lost at home to an unranked team.
9. Virginia Tech
Vanquished the FSU curse, finally.
10. Cincinnati
You'll see when they beat WVU.
Click here for the full ballot.

More Notes From the Weekend:

(1) Play of the Year: Juice on 4th and Inches.
(2) America's new most must-see team: Navy.
(3) Vote Tebow: 300+ pass, 100+ rush, 7 TDs

This Week's Bandwagon: Unexpected uniform changes.

Georgia warmed up for Auburn at home wearing their usual red jerseys; when they came back out to play the game, they were in non-traditional — but entirely bad-ass — black jerseys, the first time UGA had worn black since anyone could remember.

Fired up by the stunt, the team rolled over Auburn and is playing as well as any team in the SEC, if not the country, with a shot at getting to the SEC title game in Dawg-friendly Atlanta, in what would be UGA's first meeting this season with LSU. Here's hoping they bust out the black jerseys for that, too.

Looking Ahead to Next Week's Schedule:

BCS Top 2! LSU at Ole Miss, OREGON at Arizona (Thursday): Both have to win impressively in order to use the human polls to keep fending off whoever emerges from the hard-charging top of the Big 12.
Pick: LSU, Oregon

Big 12 Mania! Iowa State at KANSAS, OKLAHOMA at Texas Tech, MISSOURI at Kansas State: It's all about setting up an unbeaten Kansas-1-loss Missouri winner facing 1-loss Oklahoma in the BXII title game.
Pick: KU, OU, Mizzou.

Upset Special! West Virginia at Cincinnati: No need for 'Eers fans to gripe about being shut out of the BCS title game after they lose to the highly underrated Bearcats. Brian Kelly should be coaching Michigan next season.
Pick: Cincinnati

From Big to "Big": Ohio State at Michigan: Suddenly, just a really great Rivalry Game, nothing more. Big Ten title? Meh: Illinois is a better Big Ten story than either. Rose Bowl bid? Meh: Second-tier bowl this year.
Pick: Michigan.

As usual, send any comments or questions to danshanoff-[at]-gmail-[dot]-com.

But the fact is: The BCS polls have OSU in the top spot, and like it
or not, that's where the Buckeyes will stay, provided they win their
final two games, sweeping them right into one slot of the national
title-game pairing.

And so it begs the far more controversial question: Who's Number
2? Which team has the strongest claim to that second BCS slot?
Given the flimsy way Ohio State has constructed their unbeaten record,
being No. 2 at season's end seems as good as winning the BCS title
itself.

Is it LSU? No. 2 in the latest BCS poll, the Tigers overcame
their own multiple screw-ups to beat Alabama, arguably the second-best
team in the SEC, in Tuscaloosa. But was the win decisive enough? Will
voters get tired of Les Miles' close calls — and can the Tigers ride
the wire through the season-making (or -breaking) SEC title game?

Is it Oregon? The Ducks beat previously undefeated Arizona
State. But it was at Oregon. (Do the Ducks win that game at Arizona
State?) That said: They have the fewest obstacles to finishing the
season at No. 2. (If OSU, LSU and Oregon all win out, and Oregon is
shut out, they will have a hell of a legit gripe.)

Is is Kansas? One of two remaining BCS-conference unbeaten
teams hung 76 on Nebraska, but have zero respect nationally. Here's my
question: How could you NOT be rooting for Kansas to complete this
dream season? (On the other hand, KU's schedule strength makes Ohio
State's previous schedule look perilous, if you can believe that.)

Is it Oklahoma? Not until they win the Big 12 Championship,
which will involve either winning a rematch with Missouri on a neutral
field... or beating the Cinderella Jayhawks. And the Sooners would
still need LSU or Oregon BOTH to stumble ahead of them.

Is it West Virginia? Not until they beat UConn. Ponder the
improbability of that statement 10 years ago. And even if the
Mountaineers do that, they need improbable help ahead of them.

Is it anyone else? Missouri would need to beat Kansas, then
beat Oklahoma (and STILL need help)... I love a 1-loss UConn, but no
one else seems to...Of the 2-loss teams, Michigan beating Ohio State
would cap an incredible comeback, but that 0-2 start returns to haunt
them....

The bottom line: We are down to a handful of legit contenders, and all
have the potential (even likelihood) of stumbling before the finish
line. Because who wouldn't want to see a Kansas-UConn national-title
game?

This Week's Bandwagon: We Are All Navy Fans! In this most
contentious of seasons, we have argued more than we have agreed: About
Ohio State's real strength. About who's number 2. About "biggest
upsets ever." About fictitious playoff systems.

But for one moment on Saturday night, we could all agree on one thing:
Go Navy.

In an otherwise meaningless game, Navy ended a 43-game losing streak
to Notre Dame (in South Bend, no less), the longest losing streak ever
by any college football team to another.

The schadenfreude party game of the season has been reveling in
figuring out at what point Notre Dame's season has sucked worst: Was
it the nonexistent offense in the beginning? The 38-0 pummeling by
then-0-2 Michigan? The 0-5 start? It HAD to be the 38-0 loss to USC,
right?

Wrong: Rock bottom continues to be a moving target for the Irish, and
losing to a service academy they haven't lost to in 43 years qualifies
as a new low in a season of them. The 1-8 record is almost incidental.
(Almost.)

It has to be asked: How does Charlie Weis still have a job? Any other
self-respecting so-called "national" program would have jettisoned a
coach who had performed so epically poorly in his third season. Face
up to it: Weis is a feeble college coach.

This Week's BlogPoll Ballot:
1. LSU
"4th Down" = Game-winner
2. Oregon
What about Dixon's knee?
3. Ohio State
Talk to me after Michigan.
4. Kansas
Scoring 76 is no joke.
5. UConn
My "Put Down The Pipe" Pick o' the Week.
6. West Virginia
"Bye week" means "Forgotten"
7. Oklahoma
How did they lose at Colorado?
8. Missouri
Lurking behind TWO Big 12 rivals
9. Michigan
For UM, wins are wins.
10. Georgia
Wow: Was that really Troy?
Click here for the complete ballot.

Bowl Clusterf*** Series Update: How can I rank LSU *and* Oregon
ahead of Ohio State? In addition to passing the "believe what your
eyes tell you" test, LSU has at least FIVE "quality" wins better than
Ohio State's BEST win, and Oregon has at least three "quality" wins
better than OSU's best win.

OSU beating Wisconsin in Columbus did nothing to help that situation,
nor will beating Illinois in Columbus next week. Can we all agree that
Ohio State would most certainly not be unbeaten if they played in the
SEC, Pac-10, Big 12 or Big East?

(Stop griping about disrespect, OSU fans: The BCS' mouth-breathing
pollsters can't see past the "and-oh" in OSU's record; keep winning,
and you'll have a spot in the BCS title game, don't you worry. But you
better hope LSU and Oregon stumble along the way, because you know in
places you don't talk about at tailgate parties, either team would wax
the Buckeyes.)

Heisman Watch: I promised Will I wouldn't write about the
Heisman race, but since he's taking the day off today, I'll enjoy an
exemption. I was all set to declare Oregon QB Dennis Dixon
the new front-runner (as the most valuable offensive skill-position
player of a title contender, the usual Heisman criteria)...

...But preseason Heisman pick Darren McFadden forced his way
back to the top of the list after running for an SEC-record 323 yards.
I don't care that his team has 3 losses; last season's Heisman
runner-up reminded everyone that he's the best player in college
football.

Looking Ahead to Next Week's Schedule

Louisville at West Virginia (Thursday): Before the season
started, this was a de facto national semifinal playoff game. Sigh.
Pick: WVU

Illinois at Ohio State: Is it too much to ask for Leitch's
Illini to ruin the Buckeyes season? Probably.
Pick: OSU

Kansas at Oklahoma State: I am waiting for Mark Mangino's
version of Mike Gundy's rant: "I'm a man! I'm 400 pounds!"
Pick: Kansas

Auburn at Georgia: If, like me, you think the SEC is the best
conference in the country, knowing who its second-best team is
matters.
Pick: Auburn

Michigan at Wisconsin: Remember when this was supposed to be
the only stumbling block en route to a huge season for Michigan?
Pick: Michigan

Connecticut at Cincinnati: If UConn is the new South Florida,
then they better understand that Cincy just beat the old South
Florida.
Pick: Cincinnati

Florida at South Carolina: If Spurrier versus his old team is
half as good as Saban versus his old team, it'll be a barn-burner.
Pick: Florida

As usual, direct any questions or comments to
danshanoff-[at]-gmail-[dot]-com.

With all four BCS unbeatens surviving the weekend in "prove-it" wins of varying satisfaction (in order: BC, Arizona State, Kansas, Ohio State), it's a convenient moment to revisit an annually thorny issue:

Why a playoff system really doesn't work.

Whether you favor the ludicrous "Plus-One," a 4-team or an 8-team (or even an 1-AA-style 16-team) format, this is not the year for you.

If you think it's hard to pick two teams to play in a national title game from among, say, a handful of worthy teams, how the hell in a year like this do you pick a playoff field of 4 or 8 or even 16?

There's an insane alternative that I described a year ago. I remain obsessed with it. Here's how it works:

• Start by promoting 8 worthy teams from 1-AA to give 1-A a nice, bracket-friendly 128 schools. (You can already see where I'm going.)

• Play six regular-season games: Three non-conference games (to generate revenue) and three conference "rivalry" games. Week 7 is a national bye week.

• A Selection Committee seeds all 128 teams into a bracket on the basis of their first six games. Everyone is in: No "bubble," no trouble. Because of that, the best teams have an incentive to schedule an extremely competitive first six games to prepare themselves for the rigors of the tournament. (The incentive to win? Seeding and game location, same as for basketball.)

• In Week 8, you would hold the first round. 64 teams move on, 64 teams head to a loser's bracket. (Consider the amazingness of a mid-season Saturday when all 64 games are consequential.)

• Keep playing each week, using the bracket as the guide and winnowing the field. (Along the way, teams that lose are sent to an increasingly complex loser's bracket to fill out their usual 12-game schedule. But they're losers: Who cares?)

• Five weeks later (Week 13 of the season), you're down to two teams, who would then play in the national title game a month later, in what will have been established as the fairest, most scandal-free (and most dramatic) championship system in sports. Rather than what we have now.

(What happens to everyone else? The 30-some remaining bowl games out there participate in a wild open free-market to fill their various openings.)

In its favor, the system creates a true playoff and excitement unmatched in sports (even March Madness). There isn't anything out there that isn't better after being put in a bracket. Meanwhile, the regular season still ends in Week 13, as it does now.

Going against it, you would circumcise the traditional conference season, which some purists would hate even more than they hate the BCS. Plus, fans who schedule their game travel a year in advance would be totally screwed. And I would need a PhD from MIT to contemplate both the home-away scheduling fairness and the loser's bracket.

Regardless, it will never happen. It's my own personal (crack-)pipe dream. But this is the time of year when people start to talk about the mythical college football playoff solution that would somehow make everything better — but just won't realistically work, certainly not in a year like this.

So why not try an unrealistic idea?

(Seriously: Could it be any more unrealistic than the so-dubbed "Mississippi Miracle?" I'm sure you've all seen the Trinity-Millsaps game ending by now. If you haven't, here it is. This is why YouTube is one of the Top 5 fan-friendly innovations of our time.)

About that Georgia Penalty... I have to tip my hat to Mark Richt for the most classless — and effective — coaching move of the season, all but ordering his team off the sidelines and into the end zone en masse after the Bulldogs' first TD. It was such a gallingly unsportsmanlike display that I actually respect him for it, particularly since it obviously inspired Georgia to its win over rival Florida.

If the only penalty is a single "unsportsmanlike conduct" penalty, hell, I'd have my team do it after every single TD. I know the refs were completely baffled by the situation, but the flaccid penalty just didn't seem to fit the massive scale of the offense, which has the potential to spark imitators. God: Can you imagine Michigan doing the same thing against Ohio State next month? (No, but still...)

More From This Week: How soft is Ohio State's schedule? It is arguable that LSU's opponent last week ("Idle") was as tough as any team Ohio State has played this season ... I know Cal isn't the same team it was a few weeks ago when the Bears won at Oregon, but you simply can't rank Oregon ahead of Arizona State now that the Sun Devils have beaten Cal... The same goes for West Virginia and UConn, now that the Huskies have beaten 'Eers-pinning South Florida... I will never mock the name "Knowshawn" again...

This Week's Bandwagon: "Jayhawk and the Fat Man." I finally got my first chance to watch Kansas play a lot on Saturday night, and here was my biggest impression: Wow, Mark Mangino is a house.

I'm not one to make something out of personal appearance, but Mangino makes Ralph Friedgen look like the "dorm fridge." He makes Charlie Weis puffy p.f. look like Gisele Bundschen. I don't know whether Mangino has tried to diet or being "larger than life" (literally) is part of his schtick. Whatever it is, his appetite for winning seems matched only by an appetite for seconds.

(And more power to him: If college coaches tend to mimic successful peers, look for Urban Meyer to put on 100 pounds next year. Now we finally understand why Charlie Weis sucks: He lost all that weight.)

Bowl Clusterf*** Series Update: Four BCS-league unbeatens and six 1-loss teams remain legit contenders. Looking down the road, only BC, Ohio State and LSU don't inevitably run into one of the other 10. BC and Ohio State seemingly have the inside track; their limp schedules are, ironically, their No. 1 strength. (Will the SEC East's cannibalism kill LSU's argument that a 1-loss SEC champ deserves a shot at the national title over an unbeaten with an easier schedule?)

My BlogPoll Top 10 This Week
1. Boston College
Everything's coming up Jagodzinski!
2. Ohio State
Looked good beating merely OK opponent.
3. LSU
Needed idle week to prep for Saban.
4. Arizona State
Short-lived if they don't beat Ducks.
5. Oregon
Easy: Beat AZ St and move up.
6. Kansas
If jersey said "Texas," in Top 3
7. UConn
Who needs a program history?
8. West Virginia
Sitting behind...UConn?
9. Oklahoma
Poised to surge late.
10. (tie) Missouri, Georgia, Michigan
Michigan is back.
See the complete ballot here.

Looking Ahead to Next Week's Schedule: It's all about those 10 BCS-conference teams with one loss or less.

Game of the Week: Arizona State at Oregon. A quasi-playoff game! The winner might merit being in the Top 2; the loser is effectively out of the national-title picture.
Pick: Oregon

More Unbeaten-Watching:
Wisconsin at Ohio State: Will Buckeyes fans have the chutzpah to claim this as a "quality" win? (They did for Penn State.)
Pick: Ohio State.

Florida State at BC: Any chance the Eagles suffer a let-down? Not at home with 10 days to prepare against the negligible Noles.
Pick: BC

Nebraska at Kansas: What will it take to earn the Jayhawks some respect? Probably not a win over the mess known as Nebraska.
Pick: Kansas.

One-Loss BCS Contenders:
LSU at Alabama: If anyone can figure out how to beat LSU, it's the Tigers' former coach.
Pick: Alabama.

Texas A&M at Oklahoma: The Sooners keep rolling along to the Big 12 title game.
Pick: OU

Rutgers at UConn: UConn is the new South Florida is the new Rutgers. And the deep Big East is apparently the north's SEC.
Pick: UConn

Missouri at Colorado: Mizzou needs a pinball shot - win out, including a regular-season win over Kansas and, in the Big 12 title game, winning a rematch with Oklahoma. Plus everyone else losing.
Pick: Mizzou

Got any questions, comments or complaints? Email me at danshanoff-[at]-gmail-[dot]-com.

Here is the flimsiest argument I have heard about how (and where) to value a team right now:

"Because They're Unbeaten."

Why can't I buy it? Because in addition to totally discounting reasonable factors like, oh, strength of schedule, it is so inconsistently applied, by pollsters and fans alike.

Why is Ohio State No. 1? Because they're unbeaten. Not because they have played a challenging schedule so far. Not because they have any "signature" wins over great (or even very good) teams. But, let's all agree: Because they have the biggest brand name among the five remaining unbeaten teams.

Why is Boston College No. 2? Because they're unbeaten. Their early-season wins over Georgia Tech and Wake Forest just aren't that impressive a month later. Let's agree why they are the consensus No. 2: Because human pollsters remember Doug Flutie.

(The BCS computers now rank B.C. ahead of Ohio State. Then again, the computers rank one-loss LSU ahead of Ohio State, too. Be honest: Does anyone really doubt that on a neutral field, the Tigers wouldn't throttle both? But I digress...)

OK, so if you buy the "Because They're Unbeaten" thing, then how does that explain how Arizona State (ranked 4th by BCS computers) is ranked 7th/8th by the BCS' human pollsters and 7th by the AP?

And if you're one of the group who support the "Tyranny of the Unbeaten," why is undefeated Kansas ranked 9th in the BCS and even worse (as crappy as 12th) by the human pollsters?

If "unbeaten" matters so much, how does one-loss Oklahoma rank 4th across all three major human polls (AP, Harris, Coaches), even after the Sooners lost at Colorado, where the Jayhawks just WON this past weekend? (Let's not even talk about Oklahoma's escape Saturday at mighty 1-7 Iowa State.)

I'm not suggesting that Kansas should be in the Top 4, simply because KU is unbeaten. It's precisely the opposite: "Unbeaten" must be taken in context of the season, which is generally provided by the soulless computers, while we frail humans can't help but see "Ohio State" and think "Oh, if I HAVE to pick an undefeated team and the other unbeaten choices are Flutie, Pac-10 and a basketball school, then the Buckeyes MUST be No. 1."

I'm not immune: Once you get more than halfway through the season, "And-Oh" is the sultriest come-on in college football. That's why I've got 4 of the unbeatens in the Top 7 of my BlogPoll ballot this week. Because, confirming what so many Ohio State fans emailed me last week, I suck.

I have that, even though I'm pretty convinced that every team in the Top 20 with one loss (and most of the teams with two losses) could beat any of the remaining unbeaten teams on a neutral field. Again, the reason I don't reflect this in my own BlogPoll ballot is: Because I suck.

I'm with Sunday Morning QB's Matt Hinton: Strength of schedule should matter. Big wins over those strong teams should matter. That's why, if the season ended today and we applied the latest BCS computer ranking, BC would get smoked by one-loss LSU for the national title — and Ohio State would be playing Arizona State in the Rose Bowl, with nothing on the line except both teams would be going for their first meaningful win of the year.

Meanwhile, for all the jokes about the Jayhawks' strength of schedule, Kansas has the closest thing to a quality win out of any of them (at Kansas State). That's why B.C.'s game at Virginia Tech on Thursday is so huge: If the Eagles win, it would be "signature win" legitimacy that eclipses any other "big win" of the Top 10 BCS contenders.

And that's why if "because they're unbeaten" simply reflected how title-worthy a team was, Boise State would be the reigning national champ. (I'd take last season's Broncos over any of the five unbeatens this season, too.)

More from This Weekend: There's no way to put this delicately: LSU's Les Miles has bigger balls than any other coach in college football, and the only reason I'd think he wouldn't be at Michigan next season is that they can't deal with a coach who has such a huge pair.

Anyone out there lose (or win) money because Kentucky, a 7-point underdog, lost by 8 after not kicking that extra-point after their game-ending TD as time expired, which would have forced a push.

In a season of shocking upsets, may I nominate Vanderbilt beating BCS formula-favorite South Carolina in Columbia, while beating Steve Spurrier for the first time ever (holding him to six points, no less). No wonder Spurrier was in the mood to crap on Ohio State...

OK, I think it's safe to say that Notre Dame has finally hit rock bottom. (OK, maybe a home loss to the service academies. OK, no: A home loss to Duke. That would do it.) Amazingly, even as bad as they suck, you know there are probably two dozen bowl games out there that would give them an invite if they could...

For the rest of the season, I propose we relegate Minnesota to 1-AA and promote North Dakota State into he Big Ten.

This Week's BlogPoll Top 10: As I mentioned above, I lack all conviction to walk the talk. I am beaten down by the Tyranny of the Unbeaten. My final BlogPoll ballot version is due Tuesday night; maybe I'll find the strength before then. (You know it's an all-time great season in college football when your own existing finely honed sense of self-loathing can be enhanced even more by the process of filling out an effing Top 25 ballot.)

1. Ohio State
I can't look myself in the mirror.
2. Boston College
Season made or broken in Blacksburg.
3. LSU
Sure are living dangerously.
4. Oregon
Game of Their Year: Hosting USC.
5. West Virginia
Lurking in shallow 1-loss pool.
6. Kansas
Did what Oklahoma couldn't.
7. Arizona State
Time to start proving it.
8. Virginia Tech
One W over BC from legitimacy.
9. South Florida
Still can point to two huge wins.
10. Florida
Turning into last year's LSU.

Click here for my complete ballot. I am happy to acknowledge that the entire thing is a mess, particularly after No. 10 (if, wading through the morass that is 1-10, you can believe that even possible).

Looking Ahead to Next Saturday:

With only five unbeatens left, the focus turns to how many will stay that way (next week, up to four could fall) — and the jockeying among the best 1-loss teams (Oregon, LSU, West Virginia, VA Tech, Oklahoma) to rack up impressive "quality" wins (or trying to avoid unimpressive unquality wins... I'm talking to you, Oklahoma fans).

Boston College at Virginia Tech (Thursday): Coming off my pick that USF would lose last Thursday at Rutgers, I'll double down.
Pick: Virginia Tech.

Ohio State at Penn State: Can OSU fans really look deep down and claim that their team is the BEST in the country? Based on WHAT, exactly?
Pick: Ohio State.

Cal at Arizona State: So Cal goes from BCS lock 10 days ago to mere spoiler to the Sun Devils' season. Sucks to be them.
Pick: Cal.

Kansas at Texas A&M: OK, it's been fun, but it's just about time for the Jayhawks' ride to end, isn't it?
Pick: Texas A&M.

USC at Oregon: Suddenly, the winner of this game could very well earn the inside track on being the top-ranked 1-loss team in the BCS.
Pick: Oregon.

West Virginia at Rutgers: Nothing would avenge WVU ruining Rutgers' Cinderella season a year ago like Rutgers KO'ing the 'Eers BCS hopes.
Pick: WVU

Florida at Georgia: Only because it's the best nickname of any regular season game in sports: "World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party."
Pick: Florida

As usual, direct any comments, questions or complaints to danshanoff-[at]-gmail-[dot]-[com].

With Saturday's losses its two top-ranked teams, college football reached an unprecedented place it had been teetering on for weeks:

Even with a half-dozen unbeaten teams remaining, this season has officially become the biggest clusterf—k in the sport's history.

It started with the mayhem in the Top 10 two weeks ago. Last week, USC lost at home to Stanford. This week, Cal lost that shocker at home to Oregon State, just hours after it was all but assured of ascending to No. 1, because LSU went from Gator-slaying imperviousness to being on the wrong end of "Bluegrass Miracle 2: Electric Boogaloo."

Ohio State might be No. 1 today, both in the polls and Sunday's initial BCS results, but who can't see coming a Buckeyes season-ending loss at Michigan, in the perfect bookend to the Wolverines' sorry start to this season (and equally pathetic end to 2006). It's a karmic lock.

The team with the most legit claim to No. 1 — South Florida — is the top team according to the BCS' computer polls, but gets less respect from human pollsters, because the program didn't exist 10 years ago. (And, yet, USF could be as good as evicted in 72 hours, when they play at Rutgers, a team that knows something about being a Cinderella.)

BCS No. 3 Boston College is in the ACC, and simply for that, they should be discounted from this year's BCS equation. (It's moot, anyway: They'll lose in 10 days at Virginia Tech.)

Meanwhile, Arizona State is suddenly the unbeaten team to beat in the Pac-10. They won't be for long, based on their previous soft schedule and what's next: Cal, at Oregon, at UCLA, USC. (And who's that crack-smoking AP voter who gave Arizona State its lone vote for No. 1?)

Kansas may be the last unbeaten team in the underrated Big 12, but I doubt I'm offending anyone to say that I won't buy KU until I see "13-0," following a Big 12 Championship Game win over Oklahoma. Yeah, sure.

Please don't suggest unbeaten Hawaii. Just don't. (Even the initial BCS rankings have them at No. 18, a distant six spots from a guaranteed BCS bowl spot.)

That covers the six unbeatens. For the real clusterfuckitude, just try to make sense of how to sort through the 1-loss teams: Start by dismissing any who lost to unranked teams at home (USC, Cal)...

Then, teams that lost at home to ranked teams (Oregon)...

Then discount the ones who lost to unranked teams on the road (Oklahoma)...

Least offensive are the 1-loss teams that lost on the road at highly ranked opponents (West Virginia, Virginia Tech, Missouri).

For a real challenge, try to untangle the SEC's Big Three: Kentucky beat LSU. LSU beat South Carolina. South Carolina beat Kentucky. (And Kentucky and South Carolina still have to survive the SEC East, then beat a pissed-off LSU in the SEC Championship Game.)

Here's the point: With the dwindling number of unbeatens, their sketchy prospects to stay that way and a logjam of worthy 1-loss teams, the BCS Apocalypse is finally upon us.

Remember in my first Bandwagoneer post of the season, how I laid out that "Four Unbeaten Teams Will Tilt The BCS" scenario?

Yeah, um, about that: It is infinitely more complicated — more clusterfuckish — when there are NO unbeaten teams, replaced by not just three 1-loss teams, but four... or five... or six... or seven... or eight... or nine... or even 10. For once, I'm not using hyperbole.

The good news is that even just four 1-loss teams — hardly a stretch — and the process will be so tilted that if there was ever an event to trigger the reform of a playoff, it would be this.

(Hey, based on the relentlessly punishing way it has worked over the past seven weeks, maybe the regular season's de facto playoff system will continue to do what it is supposed to: Dwindle today's many contenders to an obvious pair, with the usual runner-up griping on the side. But, based on the way this season has unfolded so far, I doubt it.)

I say: Keep those shocking upsets coming. At the top of the rankings, it has been a thrill ride like no other season that fans can remember. And, with yesterday's big reveal, the BCS stands for something worthy of years of fan frustration, on the tantalizing verge of completely imploding:

Bowl Clusterfuck System.

This Week's Bandwagon: The BCS Computer Polls. I have no problems admitting that I favor the BCS' computer polls to their human counterparts. And I'm not just saying that because they rank South Florida at No. 1, which was absolutely the right place to put them.

It's also because the computers value the SEC's Big Three of LSU, South Carolina and Kentucky — each with one loss apiece — ahead of Ohio State, Arizona State and BC, who have zero losses between them. The computers didn't even need to see the six teams play "with their own eyes" — a typical human-poll "advantage" — to know the SEC trio is better.

And, if nothing else, because the PCs rank USC somewhere outside the Top 20, while the "human" pollsters of the Harris and Coaches Polls both inexplicably have USC at No. 9. (For the record, USC made a huge leap in my BlogPoll Top 25, from No. 25 all the way to No. 24.)

The computer polls have become anthropomorphic; fans and critics treat them like people, rather than recognize that the computers merely take the on-field results and make off-field sense of them. Griping about the computers is like yelling at your Google results.

But tracking how the computers will calculate their weekly rankings sure beats the truly mystifying process of understanding the decisions made in the far sketchier Harris and Coaches Polls.

My BlogPoll Ballot Top 10:
1. South Florida
Only team playing like they're not scared to lose.
2. Ohio State
Try not to preen until AFTER Michigan.
3 (tie). LSU
3 (tie). South Carolina
3 (tie). Kentucky
Ohio State would go .500 in the SEC.
6. Oklahoma
Need teams ahead to lose, and more.
7. Boston College
The Arizona State of the East.
8. Oregon
At least they lost to a ranked team.
9. West Virginia
Bye week the only safe route these days.
10. Virginia Tech
Remember my preseason BCS title pick? Hmm...

Here's a link to the entire Top 25 ballot</>.

Looking Ahead to Next Week's Schedule:

South Florida has to go to Rutgers on short rest. Ohio State has to defend a No. 1 mantle no one can maintain against unpredictable Michigan State. Teams with 1-loss have to start jockeying for BCS position. And everyone else wants their turn to play the spoiler...

South Florida at Rutgers (Thursday): I love the USF story this season enough to rank them No. 1 this week. But Rutgers knows a little something about being a national Cinderella.
Pick: Rutgers.

Auburn at LSU: LSU and Oklahoma are battling to be the top-ranked 1-loss team. Here's where the SEC schedule helps LSU: Beating Auburn is a hell of a lot more impressive than OU beating Iowa State.
Pick: LSU

Michigan State at Ohio State: I can't help but wonder if newly anointed No. 1 Ohio State can get caught looking ahead five weeks to the Michigan game?
Pick: Ohio State

Florida at Kentucky: Florida lost to LSU. One week later, LSU lost to Kentucky. In the cannibalized world of the SEC, one week later, Kentucky will surely lose to Florida.
Pick: Florida

As always, send any questions or comments to danshanoff-[at]-gmail-[dot]-com.

Appalachian State over Michigan. Syracuse over Louisville. Last weekend's upheaval of the unbeatens. All were mere prelude to the mother lode:

Stanford beat USC: The poster child of college football in the 21st Century lost to its red-headed step-sibling.

Thinking back over the decade's Trojan Dynasty, there have been a few priceless moments of schadenfreude: The 2006 Rose Bowl. Reggie Bush's scandal. The 2007 BCS implosion. Matt Leinart's life.

This tops them all: USC — mighty, dominant, loaded USC — losing at home to a 41-point Stanford underdog that was so sorry, the Cardinal scored all of 3 points a week ago in a 41-3 loss to Arizona State (and might as well have not even shown up for a shutout blowout at home a year ago to USC.)

This isn't simply about USC flushing away any hopes it had of competing for a national title this season. Like many, I would argue that this is the single most humiliating loss in modern college football history.

Michigan lost to a two-time defending 1-AA champion. Louisville doesn't play defense. So what's USC's excuse?

Maybe USC wasn't as good as its preseason No. 1 ranking (or even last week's No. 2 ranking) would have suggested. That might explain a loss later this season at Cal or other would-be Pac-10 contender.

No: In the end, this USC team was so vastly (and, in hindsight, obviously) overrated that they couldn't hold serve at home against the worst team in the West, playing with a thoroughly inexperienced emergency starting QB and no expectation of victory, let alone the expectation of a last-minute come-from-behind game-winning drive.

I come not to haze the Trojans but to bury them: The USC dynasty, running from an October 12, 2002 win over Cal through October 6, 2007 is dead.

There was foreshadowing: Getting overrun by Vince Young, losing to Oregon State and UCLA last year, unwanted pregnancies, shady alleged Heisman-sized payoffs, consistently uninspired 2007 performances.

But it wasn't until the Trojans lost ... at HOM E... to STANFORD ... that the "USChadenfreude" reached the critical, blissful moment where everyone else can stand up and cheer:

Every team that USC plays from now on can think - they can know - that they can beat the Trojans. Beat them in the Coliseum. Beat them late in the 4th quarter. Beat them when they are undefeated. Beat them with a backup QB. Beat them without any sort of winning legacy.

USC's aura of invincibility - its reign of respect - is over. It's so hard to feel superior when you're losing ... at home ... to Stanford.

This Week's Bandwagon: Ron Zook. If, like long-suffering Illinois fans, your season's expectations are "bowl eligibility," there might not be a better coach than Ron Zook. The guy recruits for a Top 10 program, then coaches the actual games like a Bottom 10 program. The result is perfectly decent, if you have no aspirations beyond the "Any Bowl."

At Illinois, he was off to a typically Zookian start: 4-19 in his first two seasons, including a solitary win in the Big Ten. But, as promised, the guy started reeling in these spectacular recruiting classes, stocking the pipeline with talent that could overcome whatever shortcomings Zook might have as, y'know, a coach.

This season has blown past any expectations: With the foreshadowing of a season-opening near-miss against a still-unbeaten Top 10 Missouri team, Zook has led Illinois to five straight wins, including three Big Ten wins, including back-to-back wins over ranked teams, including then-No. 5 Wisconsin, in a game in which Illinois went into the game favored. In five weeks, he has eclipsed his previous two seasons.

That preseason goal of bowl eligibility could come as early as this weekend at Iowa. Astonishingly, a 10-win season is not inconceivable. However, a word of caution to any Illinois bandwagoneers: Remember the original expectations, and remember this is Ron Zook we're talking about.

My BlogPoll Ballot Top 10:
1. LSU
Rallied like a team of destiny.
2. Cal
The Pac-10 is there for the taking.
3. Ohio St
Good news: Big Ten down (Bad news: B10 down)
4. South Florida
Why the trouble with Florida Atlantic?
5. Cincinnati
You scoff, yet just wait...
6. Boston College
Matt Ryan for Heisman?
7. Oklahoma
Now wait for stumbles ahead of them
8. Oregon
Well if Stanford can beat USC...
9. Missouri
All of a sudden, the Big 12's best
10. Florida
Like LSU '06: CFB's best 2-loss team
My complete Top 25 ballot.

Ranking Ranting: Let me get this straight: Michigan was ranked No. 4, lost to the two-time-defending 1-AA champion, yet was dropped completely out of the rankings. USC was ranked No. 2, lost to one of the five worst teams of any BCS conference (at home!), yet only dropped to No. 10 (No. 7 in the Coaches' and Harris polls. No. 7!) To save you the trip, I put them at No. 25 in my BlogPoll ballot, and I think that's totally reasonable.

Looking Ahead to Next Week's Schedule

Missouri at Oklahoma: Forget the Red River Rivalry. All of a sudden, this is the de facto Big 12 Championship. (No offense to Kansas.)
Pick: Oklahoma

LSU at Kentucky: After the Tigers' emotional win at home against Florida, will they suffer a let-down in Lexington? If South Carolina's tough D can stifle Andre Woodson, then I cringe at what LSU's D can do.
Pick: LSU

Boston College at Notre Dame: The Irish's jubilation at finally winning a game this season will be short-lived after B.C. swamps them in South Bend.
Pick: BC

The Bandwagoneer at Home: Just to find a little closure from last week's post about Florida's season being over, OK, now it's REALLY over. But when the Gators win the national title next season, we will point to this near-miss at LSU as the moment the run began. (Damn it.)

As always, direct any comments or questions to me at danshanoff-[at]-gmail-[dot]-com.

Sunday morning, 2 a.m.: I am writing this now because I cannot sleep, because my team's season is ruined. Obliterated.

I could be an Oklahoma fan. Or a West Virginia fan. Or a Texas fan. Or even a Rutgers fan. As it happens, I am a Florida fan. What we share is the fate that in Week 5, our team's seasons are effectively over.

Oh, sure, conference titles might still be up for grabs. But this season was about competing for a national championship. A spot in a BCS bowl simply isn't the same.

As every week seems to need some sort of forced made-for-TV alliterative hook, this past was "Shat-Away Saturday." Survey the carnage among the national-title contenders:

Oklahoma: Optimistic Sooners fans weren't just looking ahead to the Texas game. They were looking ahead to the BCS title game. Season shat away.

Florida: Guuuuhhhhh! I heard Tim Tebow's post-game tears triggered 24-hour coverage on the Weather Channel. Season shat away.

West Virginia: Wait, didn't we see this result last year in Morgantown? So why would it be different in Tampa? Season shat away.

Texas: I hate the word "pwned," but it probably fits the relationship between UT fans and Kansas State fans. Season shat away.

Rutgers: After tasting the good life a year ago, the irony is that this team was even better: Fans actually BELIEVED this time. Suckers. Season shat away.

This last entry is a critical one: Rooting for a perennial national contender is exciting in theory, but the expectations are crippling.

One bad loss: The season is a bust. You can slap labels on it like "seasoning" or "rebuilding" or "fluke," but that's all rationalizing.

When I was at Northwestern in the early 90s, we regularly noted there is something to be said for rooting for a sorry team like NU, where mere "bowl eligibility" — looking at the schedule and talking yourself into seeing six wins — is the annual dream.

So, for fans of a team like Illinois, an unexpected win over a ranked team like Penn State is, in its temporary way, as sweet as winning a championship. (Ed. Note: This is true.)

Oklahoma or West Virginia fans could end up with a BCS at-large bowl bid and they would STILL be bitter; Illini fans will flock to the Motor City Bowl and celebrate like they're in the national championship. (Ed. Note: Or the Champs Sports Bowl!)

For fans of national contenders — in this or any season — there is no such thing as an unexpected win... just unexpected losses.

Soul-crushing, mind-imploding, sleep-depriving losses. How effing disturbing is it to ponder dissatisfaction with an 11-win season? (Cripes: I almost typed "10-win season," until I realized those 2 losses would make the season damn near unredeemable. Seriously: This is so wrong. But then I wonder: If my season is all but ruined with 1 or 2 losses, how does a Notre Dame fan feel at 0-5? Unfathomable.)

Personally, I am reduced to wondering if my new Tebow jersey should be mothballed permanently for its bad juju... to watching 10-month-old DVR recordings of last year's national title game... to peeking ahead to next year's schedule (and this year's depth chart) and to plotting explanations why next year's team WILL be the national champ (and rationalizing why Saturday's loss, um, helps)... and to bracing myself for an ass-kicking next week in Baton Rouge.

Yeesh: It's only Week 5? It's a long road 'til next season's national title. But at least now the expectations can start earlier.

Wait: But... but... Florida lost last year to Auburn, then recovered to win the national title! Can we talk about this...? What about the fact that Florida is the highest-ranked of the 1-loss teams? Nooooooo... help meeee....

This Week's Bandwagon: South Florida
College football is built on tradition. Decades upon decades of tradition, allowing long-baked rivalries and attitudes to flourish.

So how do you feel about South Florida? Here's a program that didn't even EXIST 15 years ago. How can you hate them? Then again, how can you love them? How can you feel anything about them?

On the other hand, in the hierarchy of college football jobs, managing a powerhouse like Texas or USC seems relatively easy (aside from expectations). Turning around a long-standing dud, like Rutgers, is much harder. But hardest of all would be to create a program from scratch, then turn it into a national powerhouse — in one decade.

(No wait, I take it back: Hardest of all would be being given the keys to the most prominent brand name in college sports history and managing to run it into the ground in just three seasons. Rah, Charlie Weis!)

More than anything, it speaks to the motherlode of talent to be found recruiting in Florida. Jim Leavitt took Florida, FSU and Miami's sloppy fourths and turned those recruits into a Top 10 team.

USF has a tough schedule left: Believe it or not, at Rutgers, at UConn and home against Cincy suddenly reads like a daunting gauntlet.

But if the Bulls can survive it unscathed, combined with a signature non-conference win over the team that just beat Florida in Gainesville, it's not crazy to consider South Florida a BCS title-game contender.

My BlogPoll Ballot Top 10
1. LSU
AP finally catches up with the bloggers.
2. South Florida
Officially the best team in the state.
3. Cal
But are they ready to dethrone USC?
4. Ohio State
Played at UW tougher than USC.
5. USC
Just lucky Jake Locker is a spaz.
6. Boston College
Defied my prediction of a 1-AA upset.
7. Wisconsin
What happened to the stout D?
8. Kentucky
This can't possibly last, can it?
9. Cincinnati
Cincy is my new Rutgers, apparently.
10. Florida/Oklahoma (tie)
Both played like ass.
Here's Here's my complete BlogPoll ballot this week.

Rankings Ranting: Cripes, anyone else think they had a handle on the field before Saturday? I was pretty curious to see how the pollsters would handle it.

As it happens, the most important detail is this: Where (and how) do the pollsters rank last week's six previously unbeaten Top 10 teams, which would indicate which one-loss team has the inside track in the event of losses to the teams ahead of them?

Advantage: Florida. The Gators are 7th in the Coaches poll (9th AP), then Oklahoma (10/10), then WVU (12/13), then Oregon (13/14), then Texas (16/19), then Rutgers (21). (Of course, after Florida gets shellacked at LSU, this will be moot.)

Seriously: What happens now? Suddenly, LSU-Florida is no longer the Game of the Year. Oklahoma-Texas is the Dud River Rivalry. USC-Cal is shaping up as a de facto national semifinal. Oh, and South Florida is America's Team.

I suppose fans of the one-loss erstwhile contenders could look to last year's Florida team for hope: Those Gators lost early to Auburn, yet ended up winning the national title. But that team needed all sorts of cockeyed help, like USC losing to UCLA and Lloyd Carr's rhetorical and political ineptitude. You just can't count on that this year.

But with only 15 unbeaten teams remaining (LSU, USC, Cal, OH St, Wisco, USF, BC, Kent'y, Hawaii, Mizzou, AZ St, Cincy, Purdue, UConn, Kansas) and only five weeks of the season gone by, there's always the chance — maybe even the inevitability, given those teams' remaining schedules — that NO teams will finish unbeaten.

Looking Ahead to Next Week's Schedule:

It cannot possibly get any more crazy than this past weekend, can it? Except if LSU, Ohio State, Wisconsin, Kentucky, Mizzou and Cincy all lose, then Oklahoma and Texas agree that the winner gets to strike last week's loss from their official record. All could happen!

Florida at LSU: Perhaps Saturday's biggest loser was the Tigers, whose thumping of Florida won't be nearly as impressive now as it would have been had the Gators been unbeaten and ranked No. 2 or 3.
Pick: LSU.

Oklahoma vs. Texas (in Dallas): The question is, which team is more pissed their season's hopes and dreams were shot to hell the previous week? And how to do they focus that rage?
Pick: Oklahoma.

Kentucky at South Carolina: Suddenly, the SEC East looks available for the taking by new national MVP favorite Andre' Woodson. (First-name apostrophes are the new Heisman pose.)
Pick: Kentucky.

Ohio State at Purdue: The Buckeyes side-stepped last weekend's epidemic of upsets, but the Boilermakers' offense — and home-field advantage — might be enough to trip them up this time.
Pick: Purdue.

Cincinnati at Rutgers: If this year's South Florida is last year's Rutgers and this year's Cincinnati is last year's USF, then this year's Rutgers is last year's West Virginia: The team up-and-coming programs want to knock off to prove their legitimacy.
Pick: Cincinnati.

As usual, send any comments or questions to danshanoff-[at]-gmail-[dot]-com.

The original name of this guest-post was "Dan Shanoff Is The Tebow," so it was inevitable that I would devote at least some space to Florida's QB — who, after a mere four games, is the rock star of the year in college football. Saturday, Tebow accounted for 426 yards of offense, the hard way: 260 passing (with 2 TDs) and a Florida-record 160 rushing (with another 2 TDs). Heisman buzz is rampant, and fanboy panting is near-universal.

Tim Tebow's exploits are college football fans' new version of the famous improv joke, "The Aristocrats." See how far you can take your own story that ends "And THAT'S how special Tim Tebow is." Here's mine:

A few months ago, my in-laws and their friends ran into Tebow in Gainesville's Outback Steakhouse. He signed a greasy menu for my kid. By the time the menu arrived at my apartment, the grease stain had morphed into the outline of a workable plan to offer universal health-care to every American, including illegals. And THAT's how special Tim Tebow is.

Over the last three weeks, I watched Tebow play twice in person. (Cripes: I even broke down and bought a Tebow jersey.) He is a freak of talents. I have yet to come up with the proper QB analogue. Let me try:

If Matt Leinart fathered a son — with Tommie Frazier — THAT would be Tim Tebow. (Some Florida fans might demand I use "Paul Bunyan" and "Jesus" as the parents, but even by Tebow standards, that seemed excessive. How about "Jack Bauer" and "Jesus?")

What screws up the equation is that, unlike Leinart, Tebow is apparently a spectacular person. He's grounded, outgoing and pleasant and always signs autographs. He gives talks in prisons, then hugs the inmates. He took a nationally televised kiss from his roommate/teammate without worrying about his masculinity. He's enthusiastic, but without the dickishness that made JJ Redick or Joakim Noah (or Matt Leinart) so nationally hateable.

Tebow is super-religious and does a lot of evangelizing, but — as a non-Evangelical — what I appreciate most is that you never get that sense on the football field from him. No ironically sacrilegious "First off, I want to thank God" in interviews about a football game. No palms clasped, looking skyward, immediately after touchdowns; he seems to prefer the Gator Chomp.

If you listen to the rumors (or check out the tribute site Tim Tebow Facts), Tebow cures the sick. Tebow makes ovaries weep. Tebow always picks the perfect NFL Fantasy roster. Tebow should run the Fed. Tebow could fix Iraq. Tebow is who guys want to be and women want to be with. (Hell: Guys, too. What? Oh, like you wouldn't.)

This is what we have been reduced to: This 19-year-old with all of four college starts as more myth than man.

Where are Tebow's flaws? For starters, the ball he throws usually wobbles like an SEC sorority girl after a night with grain and Lik-a-Stik. And he hasn't faced down an 80-yard drive with two minutes left, down five, in Baton Rouge. Then again, Tebow is the real-life Optimus Prime.

A backlash is inevitable, and I'm fascinated to see when it happens. This week? After a loss (or win) at LSU? End of the season? Next year? If/when he returns for his senior season?

I had always seen this season as a warm-up for Tebow. With a year of full-time starting under his belt and a more favorable schedule in 2008, I had pictured him making his Heisman and national-title run next season. But myths won't wait — and neither will hyperbole.

Wait: I heard that on Saturday morning, Tim Tebow winked in the direction of Ann Arbor and saved Michigan's season. And a drop of his sweat rubbed into your back permanently rids you of unwanted hair. And then then there's this, which speaks for itself...

More From This Weekend: Cripes, what the hell happened to Louisville?... Notre Dame still sucks, but at least the "perfection" of 0-8 is still on the table... Will everyone shut up about Nick Saban now?... Is Cincinnati the most underrated team in the country?... Donovan McNabb must have been watching the Texas Tech-Oklahoma State game... Nothing says "midseason" like "Steve Spurrier is yanking his starting QB"... So if Appalachian State beat Michigan and Wofford beat App State, does that mean we can reasonably conclude Wofford is better than Michigan?

So Surreal That It's Worth Its Own Item: So, like many of you, I was sitting there watching Georgia and Alabama in OT. Bama had just kicked a field goal and Georgia was about to take the field. The Alabama crowd is going nuts. Play-by-play guy Mike Patrick says to analyst Todd Blackledge "I have an important question..."

There is a pause. Like many viewers, I have given Patrick my particular attention, waiting for his trenchant query, perfectly suiting an incredibly dramatic college football moment. Then Patrick continues:

"What is Britney doing with her life?"

There is dead silence on the air. Let me continue the scene...

Blackledge: "Who?"
Patrick: "Britney!"
More uncomfortable silence.
Blackledge: "Britney who?"
Patrick: "Spears!"
More uncomfortable silence.
Patrick: "What is she doing with her career?"
More uncomfortable silence.
Now: Uncomfortable laughter.
Blackledge: "Why do we care at this point?"
Good point. More uncomfortable silence.
Blackledge: "Is she here?"
Patrick: "I don't think so."
Blackledge: "Is she a football fan?"
Patrick: "Aw, I'm sure she is."
More awkward silence. Pleasehikepleasehike...
Patrick: "Georgia from the 25..."

And...scene! On that very play, Georgia proceeds to score the game-winning touchdown on that play, blissfully ending any further airtime for Patrick to obsess about Britney. Here's the video.

This Week's Bandwagon: Oh My God. Michigan Is Back. Ohio State and Wisconsin fans can feel free to disagree, but the rest of the country is now filled with one certainty above any other: Is there any doubt now that Michigan is going to win the Big Ten?

After that humiliating 0-2 start — all that talk about firing Lloyd Carr and "Worst Loss Ever" (twice!), it's a no-brainer of a karmic payback. Sure, they'll be 10-2 and get worked over in the Rose Bowl. Sure, saying "Appy" in Ann Arbor will get you dirty looks from UM's octogenarian season-ticket holders. Sure, frosh QB Ryan Mallett makes Byron Leftwich look nimble.

But all of a sudden, who wants to play them? In six weeks, they'll be 8-2 with tons of momentum, playing at Wisconsin, then hosting Ohio State with the Big Ten title on the line. At least we can all still whisper "Appy" and Michigan fans will have to pipe down.

My BlogPoll ballot Top 10:
1. LSU
"Werewolf with a chainsaw for a penis."
2. USC
Meh. I'm still not buying.
3. Oklahoma
I picked them to lose at Tulsa. My bad.
4. Florida
A little too close for comfort in Oxford.
5. Rutgers
Defeated mighty "Idle" to stay in Top 5.
6. West Virginia
Coming up: Rematch with South Florida.
7. Ohio State
Last week's dis yields this week's love.
8. Cal
Entire season comes down to...at Oregon?
9. Boston College
Toughest game remaining? Yes: UMass!
10. Texas
Two weeks until Red River Shootout.
Rising: Cincinnati, Missouri
My complete BlogPoll Top 25 ballot this week.

Looking Ahead to Next Week:
First, a quick mea culpa: I totally blew last week's "Upset Special" of Tulsa over Oklahoma. I didn't even get it right if you factor in the 20-plus point spread. You'll notice above that I leap-frogged the Sooners over my Gators as penance. That, and OU deserves it more.

Big East: West Virginia at South Florida. Friday night special! I'm a big believer in revenge as motivation. Last year, USF went up to Morgantown and ruined the Eers' BCS shot. WVU enjoys payback.
Pick: West Virginia

Pac-10: Cal at Oregon. Call it a "Pac-10 Play-In": The winner has the inside track to be to displace USC as the league's top dog. The loser's fans have to stop emailing me complaining about disrespect.
Pick: Oregon (Game of the Week!)

Big Ten: Michigan State at Wisconsin. The Spartans are 4-0, but are they for real? It's not like beating Notre Dame is enlightening. But beating the Badgers in Madison sure would be.
Pick: Wisconsin

SEC: Auburn at Florida. More revenge! Last year, the Tigers nearly ruined the Gators' championship season. Nearly. But that was Chris Leak and his dainty sensibilities. This is Tim Tebow.
Pick: Florida

Big 12: Kansas State at Texas. Rematch of an '06 thriller that officially KO'ed UT, then-defending national champs, from relevancy. Like WVU and UF, UT will find satisfaction in vengeance.
Pick: Texas

ACC: Clemson at Georgia Tech. Exactly the kind of tough mid-season road game at a wobbly opponent that usually blows Clemson's shot at an ACC Championship season.
Pick: Georgia Tech

I-AA vs. I-A: UMass at B.C.. The Eagles should be in your Top 10 by now. UMass is just the kind of I-AA (sorry: "F.C.S.") powerhouse that can't NOT shock its in-state big brother.
Pick: UMass (Upset Special!)

The Bandwagoneer at Home:

Yom Kippur on a Saturday puts a cramp on the Jewish college football viewer's style, but self-denial was a small price to pay for repentance. (Was it sacrilegious to DVR games unavailable to me during the day's observance, only to watch them in the evening?)

As always, send any comments, criticisms or questions to danshanoff-at-gmail-dot-com.

What makes college football so compelling is that despite the worst actual championship system in sports, its regular season is the most meaningful — it is a de facto playoff from Week 1 onward. A single loss and a team is all but eliminated.

Just look at Louisville: Any chance the Cardinals had of surging to an unbeaten season and a spot in the national-title game were lost at Kentucky. Week 3: Season over. Thanks for playing.

That said, even after just three weeks, fans have seen enough to recognize the handful of teams that are legit title contenders. In fact, for you playoff buffs, there's a "quarterfinals" scenario:

&#8226; LSU-Florida winner (Oct. 6)
&#8226; Oklahoma-Texas winner (Oct. 6)
&#8226; West Virginia-Rutgers winner (Oct. 27)
&#8226; USC-Cal winner (Nov. 10)

(No offense to the survivor of Ohio State, Penn State and Wisconsin, but between the Buckeyes' showing in the national championship last season and Michigan's conference-wide taint stain, the Big Ten doesn't have the juice to crack that crowd this season. Plus: Everyone figures they'll knock each other off anyway.)

Now, that doesn't take into consideration one of those contenders surviving their "big" game, yet losing unexpectedly (like USC against UCLA or WVU against South Florida last season) or another unlikely contender emerging unbeaten.

Hell, we'll gladly take either scenario, because — as discussed in the season-opener — four unbeaten teams at the end of the season is BCS Armageddon... which might not be a bad thing if you ultimately want the postseason to be as meaningful as the regular season.

More From This Weekend: Andre Woodson wins the battle; Brian Brohm is still the top QB of next year's NFL Draft... Having witnessed in person: Yes, Tim Tebow IS that exciting... Darren McFadden is the best player in college football, but where was he when Arkansas needed him the most?... Colt Brennan's pinball stats are kind of monotonous... The game you should have found a way to watch: Tulsa 55, BYU 47 (no OT), featuring 1,027 yards of combined passing offense.

This Week's Bandwagon: Shitting on Notre Dame. I know Will covered this earlier, but I must reiterate:

We are living in a spectacular (even unprecedented) moment for those of us who enjoy Notre Dame schadenfreude. The nation's most prominent college football team is, remarkably inarguably, the nation's worst college football team.

(Cripes: Even DUKE has a win. Sorry: Even Duke has scored an offensive touchdown.)

And, yes, it is going to get worse: So. Much. Worse. Analysts look at Notre Dame's next five games (Mich St, at Purdue, at UCLA, BC, USC) and charitably offer that Notre Dame might win one. Might. But they're totally hedging.

"0-8" is exactly the type of perfection we've come to expect from Notre Dame, and the Irish should strive for that perfection: From "Wake Up the Echoes" to just "Wake Up the Oh-fer." (Or just "Wake Up the Eck.")

Charlie Weis has done something spectacular: He has made Bob Davie look like Knute Rockne. It is not unreasonable to suggest that if Tyrone Willingham had started his third year at Notre Dame like this, he would have been fired by Saturday night.

Weis has said, naively and ridiculously, that he's "starting training camp" — in Week 4 of the regular season. (But don't try to call it "rebuilding" or Weis will eat you... then staple you out of his stomach... then sue you....)

How about "starting" to regret the decision to give Weis that 10-year contract extension in 2005, merely seven games into his Notre Dame career? Because the most recent three games say more about his future.

Ranking Rant: Let me get this straight: Arkansas goes on the road and ekes out a loss at unranked Alabama, which both sets of pollsters were so impressed by that they vaulted the Tide from "Unranked" to the Top 20, replacing Arkansas and exiling the Hogs to the land of "Also Receiving Votes."

Meanwhile, Louisville loses on the road at unranked Kentucky, but not only do the Cardinals get to retain their place in the Top 25, but they are ranked AHEAD of Kentucky in both AP and Coaches' polls.

Look: I too bought into the Saban hype, debuting the Tide at No. 20 in my BlogPoll rankings, but at least I kept Arkansas clinging on at No. 25. Meanwhile, I debut Kentucky at No. 15; we can disagree about where in the Top 25 to put the Wildcats, but — at a minimum — how can anyone rank them BEHIND Louisville?

More Ranking Ranting: After winning at Auburn two weeks ago, South Florida went unranked by both the media and coaches; however, after beating mighty "Idle" this week, USF finally (and rightfully) entered the rankings... Heading the other direction, UCLA earned its punishment, going from No. 11 to unranked, but it begs the question why they were ranked that high to begin with that they could take such a shellacking from Utah.

My BlogPoll ballot Top 10:
1. LSU
Perilloux: CFB's best backup QB?
2. USC
OK, that was very convincing.
3. Florida
Harvin is the payoff-free Bush.
4. Oklahoma
Bradford: Makes fans forget Bomar.
5. Rutgers
Keep mocking, everyone....
6. West Virginia
Is Devine even better than Slaton?
7. Cal
Could be only team to stop USC.
8. Wisconsin
Hill = Dayne 2.0
9. Boston College
Just look at those quality wins.
10. Penn State
Best of Big Ten in a down year.
With UW, top dog of a down-year Big Ten.

Rising: Kentucky (15), Cincinnati (23)
My complete BlogPoll Top 25 ballot this week.

Looking Ahead to Next Week:

Oklahoma at Tulsa: My "Upset Specials" this season have kinda sucked; I might as well keep it up. This is precisely the kind of trap game that will trip up a Sooners team already being talked about as a "gimme" unbeaten. Set the over-under at 100.
Pick: Tulsa.

Penn State at Michigan: If Michigan fans thought the Wolverines righted the season with a win over the worst team in college football, they are sadly mistaken. Here's a guarantee for Mike Hart: Penn State wins.

South Carolina at LSU: For the Ol' Ball Coach to win at Georgia is one thing; for him to shock the world at LSU is another entirely. The Tigers' favorable SEC schedule is showcased.
Pick: LSU

Georgia at Alabama: The new national buzz for Nick Saban will either ramp up with a second straight nationally televised win over another Top 25 SEC rival... or implode along with the Tide's dreams of a BCS bowl.
Pick: Bama

Michigan State at Notre Dame: 0-4. Heh.
Pick: MSU

The Bandwagoneer on the Road:

GAINESVILLE, Fla. — On a swamp-ass Saturday at The Swamp for Florida-Tennessee, I had a chance to meet up with two college football celebrities: Orson Swindle (of the must-read college football blog Every Day Should Be Saturday) and Clay Travis (of the must-read college football book "Dixieland Delight").

I'd like to nominate Orson as mayor of Tailgateville, and Clay — a die-hard Tennessee fan — took WAY too much abuse while I was walking with him (and he noted it was mild compared to what he usually hears). I'm all for mocking opposing fans, but at least TRY to be clever about it. Like design a T-shirt re-naming Cletus Spuckler's 26 kids after former Vols. (Hell, you could just use the Colquitts.)

Meanwhile, my game seats were about 40 feet from Chris Leak, who was standing on the Florida sidelines because it's not like he has an NFL job to keep him busy. Not only was Leak not wearing blue — unlike 90,000 other fans in the stadium, per Urban Meyer's pre-game request — but Leak was wearing jorts (jeans shorts) confirming all of those embittered theories about Gators fans' fashion sense.

I did, however, get a close-up look at CBS' SEC sideline reporter Tracy Wolfson, who performs in the shadow of uber-sideliner Erin Andrews. Wolfson is spectacularly underrated, and — allow the blasphemy — the bigger hottie. Simply put, Erin and Tracy are the Betty and Veronica of TV sideline reporters. (Mr. Weatherbee: Lou Holtz, obviously.)

As always, send any comments, criticisms or questions to danshanoff-at-gmail-dot-com.

GAINESVILLE, Fla. — I'm spending the week embedded in SEC country. That alone probably should have been enough for me to abandon last week's prediction that Virginia Tech would beat LSU in Baton Rouge, let alone my asinine (if admirable) preseason position that Virginia Tech would win the national title.

But I accept the reality: LSU is awesome. The Tigers' offense hung 48 points on what was arguably, coming into the season, the best defense in the country. (Adding insult to injury, LSU's D can now claim that "nation's best defense" title, too.)

Friends: That's your No. 1 team in the country.

Indulge me a brief rant about this week's AP and Coaches' Top 25: While LSU was busy obliterating a Top 10 team, USC was battling it out with that perennial strength-of-schedule booster: "Idle."

I was hoping that voters would see the lunacy of keeping USC at No. 1 ahead of No. 2 LSU simply because ... USC was there last week — and didn't lose. Alas, 2/3 of AP voters favored inertia over evidence.

If we go by our own eyes, rather than preseason bullshit, LSU is clearly the best team in the country. This week, and every week until another contender delivers a more impressive win. Just don't expect LSU to lose:

LSU's four toughest remaining games — South Carolina, Florida, Auburn and Arkansas — all come in Baton Rouge. (Compare that to USC, which still has to play AT Nebraska, AT Washington, AT Oregon, AT Cal and against intra-city rival UCLA.)

You don't have to be drinking the SEC Kool-Aid like me to have watched that game on Saturday night and to have seen just how ferocious —- how relentless — LSU is this season.

Merely two weeks into the season, we have our top contender. The pollsters can keep ranking USC ahead of the Tigers, but fans know what we have seen.

More from this weekend: (1) OK, so maybe TCU isn't this year's Boise State... (2) Then again: This year's Boise State isn't this year's Boise State either... (3) Given Washington at 2-0 versus Notre Dame at 0-2, ND couldn't possibly have been worse off with Willingham in Year 7 than Weis is in Year 3... (4) Is the best coach in college football South Florida's Jim Leavitt?... (5) Steve Spurrier could win at Georgia if he had Lee Corso as his QB playing with a baby arm.

This Week's Bandwagon: So who will be Michigan's next coach? It's funny to imagine Michigan fans last week saying, "Well, at least it can't get worse." But, amazingly, it did: The most lopsided loss by the team in multiple generations. So it's not "if" but "when" the team starts looking for a new head coach...

... Because we all sure as hell know it ain't gonna be Lloyd Carr for much longer. I'm not in the camp that he should be fired. He ought to do the right thing and just resign, giving defensive coordinator (and presumptive in-house candidate Ron English) a shot at salvaging the season.

Meanwhile, Michigan fans should root for alumnus Les Miles to win a title this season at LSU. With nothing left to prove there, Miles might just be persuaded to rebuild Michigan's broken program. Double-digit wins consistently out of the Big Ten is easier than in the SEC.

Other should-be Michigan coaching contenders:
1. Rich Rodriguez, West Virginia
2. Greg Schiano, Rutgers
3. Kirk Ferentz, Iowa

More Ranking Ranting: I'm not quite sure why South Florida winning at a ranked Auburn or Washington solidly beating AP favorite Boise State wouldn't merit making the Top 25 this week. But, hey: A handful of voters took advantage of the new "App State" rule and had the Mountaineers in their Top 25. So there's that.

My BlogPoll ballot Top 10
1. LSU
Hard to see who can stop them.
2. USC
Good luck with that road schedule.
3. Rutgers
Rare contender with O/D balance.
4. Louisville
With that offense, who needs a D?
5. Oklahoma
Not quite as bullish as AP (No. 3)
6. West Virginia
Last week's No. 1. No D, either.
7. Florida
Can Tim Tebow play defense, too?
8. Texas
Considering I picked TCU...
9. Cal
Beat USC or bust.
10. Oregon
Don't penalize for Michigan's Hep-D.
Rising: South Carolina (14), Georgia Tech (15), Washington (22)
Check out the entire ballot here.

Looking Ahead to Next Week's Schedule:

Notre Dame (Unranked) at Michigan (UR): It's the first annual Schadenfreude Bowl, pitting two winless giants to see who sucks worse.
Pick: Who cares?

USC (1) at Nebraska (14): I know the Pac-10 schedule suddenly looks a hell of a lot tougher, but who else would LOVE to see USC lose NOW?
Pick: USC.

Boston College (UR) at Georgia Tech (15): Not sure how BC is still unranked by the AP, but winner of this could be the next ACC champs.
Pick: Georgia Tech.

Boston College (21) at Georgia Tech (15): Forget Virginia Tech: This game could be the de facto ACC Championship.
PIck: Georgia Tech

Tennessee (22) at Florida (5): See below. The Gators are overrated, and I say that as a Florida fan. Erik Ainge could skewer UF's porous D.
Pick: Florida.

Louisville (9) at Kentucky (UR): Showdown between the first two QBs taken in the 2008 NFL Draft: Brian Brohm and Andre Woodson.
Pick: Louisville.

Ohio State (10) at Washington: After last week's win over Boise State, all of a sudden, the Huskies look REALLY tough to beat in Seattle.
Pick: Washington.

Arkansas (16) at Alabama: Houston Nutt and Nick Saban should get to guest-host PTI. Not crazy to call this a must-win for Saban.
Pick: Arkansas.

The Bandwagoneer On the Road:
Apologies to everyone at the Florida-Troy tailgates who I didn't get a chance to see. I'll be at The Swamp again next week for Tennessee, this time hanging out with a couple of surprise college football "celebrities." More next week.

Send any comments, criticisms or questions to danshanoff-at-gmail-dot-com.

Not that they would ever let me participate, but I know what I would do if I was a voting member of the AP Top 25 (or advising a coach who votes in the Coaches' Top 25):

Exile Michigan entirely.

Certainly for this week. Possibly, punitively, for as many weeks until the Wolverines lose the stink of humiliation. That could take a while.

When the official polls come out today, I simply won't understand if Michigan is still in the Top 25. Hell, as a self-respecting college football fan, I'll be outraged.

I don't even want to see them listed under the "Also Receiving Votes," because that implies that at least some voters thought Michigan was rank-worthy.

Presumably, Michigan's pollster-defenders will point to their preseason Top 5 ranking. I would counter that "inertia" is no reason to leave a team in the Top 25, when all we have to go on is a single performance.

The preseason poll was, at best, a guess- - immediately to be remedied and revitalized in the face of actual on-field evidence. Hell, pollsters should want to overhaul their preseason guesswork.

The problem is: Too many pollsters use the preseason Top 25 as the anchor for their entire season's ballot work, rather than recognize it for the empty summer debate-fodder that it is.

(Want proof? Look at how many pollsters keep USC as the No. 1 team, simply because they were the No. 1 team in the preseason poll and didn't lose. Nevermind that if you actually watched the game, the Trojans sure as hell didn't play like a No. 1 team, when other teams looked more worthy — this week, at least. But why would a pollster let actual game results get in the way of maintaining ballot consistency from preseason to Week 1?)

So while I'm punishing Michigan , let me throw out another one: Any pollster who put Michigan in their Top 25 ballot this week should lose their privilege of voting.

There is no reason that, with more than 60 NCAA teams that actually won their season-openers (most against — gasp! — 1-A opponents), a team that is 0-1 with that one loss coming to a 1-AA team (again: at home!) should be ahead of 25 of them.

Forget the "I'm entitled to my opinion" defense most voters will give you: Any voter who keeps Michigan in their Top 25 appears to know so little about college football that they shouldn't be given this ultimate responsibility.

Unfortunately, the coaches — as part of their own poll's DNA of chicanery — won't release the individual ballots on a week-by-week basis. Maybe that's because they don't want the "coaches" who "voted" to be caught unaware that the assistant SID who actually DID fill out the ballot did something inane... like list Michigan in the Top 25.

AP voters should be held to a higher standard: Each voter should declare where they stood on Michigan this week, complete with a defense of the indefensible. (Pay particular attention to where the Michigan-beat voters rank the team they depend on access for to do their jobs.)

However, no matter who they work for, if ANY voters who continued to rank Michigan in their Top 25 happen to "cover" college football for your local newspaper, I feel badly for you, because it would be hard to take their reporting or analysis seriously.

Ideally, before voters made the mistake of plugging in " Michigan," they should have stopped to consider whether they should really be writing in "Appalachian State" in Michigan 's place.

(Honestly: Would Michigan fans even want to see their team in the Top 25 this week? With that big ol' "0-1" staring them in the face. With the sarcastic comments coming from other fans. With the understanding that Top 25 placement would be a "rep" move — presumably out of pity?)

Michigan may yet earn their way back into the Top 25 — I'm not even sure a home win over Oregon next week will do it for me, although that win is hardly a sure thing anyway.

But for now? Top Nothing.

(UPDATE FROM SHANOFF: So the coaches and media pull the second-biggest upset of the week in college football, defying my low expectations and yoinking Michigan from the Top 25. It's rare to have your faith in such a perennially infuriating group of humanity restored, even partially. I tip my cap to those who left them off entirely.

No team in the 18-year history of a 25-team AP poll has ever plummeted further in one week. Michigan still received 39 poll points from some asinine AP voters, including a 16th-place vote from Wayne Phillips of the Greenville Sun in Tennessee.

The coaches nearly let the Wolverines in: Michigan was ranked 27th, and 22 of 60 coaches had Michigan in their Top 25, including - reportedly - one who had Michigan ranked 10th. Whoever that coach was REALLY needs to explain themselves.

(I have my own theory: Mike Bellotti of Oregon, which plays Michigan next, has a vested interest in playing as high-ranked a team as possible. Mike, are you the Michigan Mystery Moron?)

This Week's Hot Bandwagon: "F.C.S." They picked the wrong time to change it from the classic "1-AA" to the impenetrable "F.C.S.", which stands for "Football Championship Subdivision."

Apparently the division formerly known as "1-A" is formally known as "F.B.S.," or "Football Bowl Subdivision." (Or, for those with a sense of humor about 1-A's lack of a 1-AA-style playoff, "Football B.S.")

This must be the worst NCAA marketing decision since "B.C.S." The "lower" division claims "Championship." The "higher" division gets "Bowl." That 1-AA marketing team knew something Michigan coaches didn't, obviously.

My BlogPoll ballot Top 10 this week*:
1. West Virginia
2. LSU
3. Louisville
4. Cal
5. Virginia Tech
6. Florida
7. USC
8. Wisconsin
9. Rutgers
10. Arkansas
Honorary: Appalachian State
Intriguing: Georgia , TCU, Penn St , Miami , Tulsa
Full ballot here.

(* - For the record, I didn't even THINK about ranking Michigan in my Top 25. I'm sure some/many of my BlogPoll colleagues have Michigan in their Top 25. While the media and coaches are predictable in their limp Michigan-backing, I would have expected better from bloggers.)

Next Saturday's Must-See Games (picks in bold):

Virginia Tech at LSU: If you're one of the few — cough! — who picked VA Tech to win the national title, this is the season-maker/-breaker, matching up the two best Ds in the country.

TCU at Texas : "This Year's Boise " top-contender TCU blanked Baylor in Week 1. Texas barely survived against Arkansas State . All signs point to "Upset."

Oregon at Michigan : If the Wolverines can lose at home to a 1-AA team, what will they do against a Top 25-ish Pac-10 team? Dare to dream: Michigan 0-2?

Miami at Oklahoma : New Canes coach Randy Shannon had it easy in his debut vs. Florida Int'l. At Norman is an entirely other matter.

South Carolina at Georgia : I underrated the Dawgs against Oklahoma State , but all bets are off against the Ol' Ball Coach.

Notre Dame at Penn State : After Paterno's team put up 59 in a shutout and Weis' guys stunk it up, it's looking ugly for the Irish.

South Florida at Auburn : Are the Bulls for real? A win over Auburn (who barely avoided being upset by Kansas State on Saturday) would be huge for USF's (and the Big East's) cred.

Nebraska at Wake Forest : Was the Huskers' 52 in a win over Nevada legit? Wake is 0-1, but put up a fight on the road at underrated BC.

Attention, readers in Gainesville : I'll be making my annual pilgrimage down to the Swamp next week. Who's got a tailgate I can crash drop by? Drop a line to danshanoff[at]gmail[dot]com. The usual comments are welcome, too.