Dan Steinberg has the heartbreaking tale of these wayward souls who had to go to the Georgia Dome of all places, just to tell Dan Snyder that he sucks. A worthy goal indeed, but it's hell on your car tires. This whole situation would be much funnier if I wasn't also a Lions fan. You saw how hard it was to get rid of Matt Millen and he didn't even own stock.

Stay strong, fellas.

Burgundy Revolution travels to Atlanta [D.C. Sports Bog]

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Broncos and Steelers are the Monday Night game and the ESPN ticker just seriously said: "OUT: Ryan Clark (sickle cell trait)" so you know it will be a weird night. Anyway, thanks for your continued support of Deadspin. Hey, look ... it's Neidermeyer.

This is Pat Hill. She's had season tickets since the early 1960s. Her daughter used to dance for the Redskins. She's a 73-year-old real estate dealer who lives on $400 a month in social security, because no one in this country has enough money to buy a house. In 2007, she signed a 10-year, $5,300-a-year contract to purchase two premium seats at FedEx Field and when she kindly asked for a couple of years off to get back on her feet, the team sued her into oblivion.

Hill's is just one of many sob stories featured in this series about the dastardly Washington ticket office—that I am no fan of—but when you read the tales of woe, they get slightly less sympathetic. Some of those who were sued admitted that they barely read the contract they signed. One who says he was "cheated," actually got exactly what he was looking for through negotiation. One lawyer complained that they sued his client after he was declared schizophrenic, but the next sentence conveniently mentions that the Redskins abandoned the lawsuit. Same thing for the guy who was in jail for embezzlement. (The Nationals actually gave that dude free tickets.) Most had full judgments rendered against them because they never showed up for trial.

Hill didn't respond to her lawsuit because she "doesn't believe in bankruptcy." (Seriously.) However, the tale of her Redskins "choo-choo" train that she had to sell is very sad indeed. Daniel Snyder haters are likely boiling over with rage at this point, but the Redskins say they do everything they can to work out payments plans and in any case, they gots to get paid.

Washington Redskins React to Fans' Tough Luck With Tough Love [Washington Post]
Daniel Snyder and the Economics of Fan Stupidity [Stet Sports Blog]
Previously: Redskins Cut Out Middle Man, Sell Directly To Scalpers

Six Flags, under Shapiro's leadership, has absolutely tanked. One might call it the "Teammates" of amusement park franchises.

Two years ago, when Snyder began building his stake in the company, it traded near $12 a share. In mid-November, after the company missed Wall Street expectations, the stock dropped to $1.91 and has mostly stayed there.

Securities lawyers say that a share price that low creates a perilous situation for Snyder. MarketWatch, among other business media, speculated that the company is "distressed" and listed it among those that may have to file for bankruptcy in 2008.

One suspects those at ESPN who remember the Shapiro regime are shedding few tears.

Snyder's Six Flags Sinking Fast [Washingtonian]

For the month of October, if you want to cut in line for a ride at Six Flags Great American in Gurnee, Illinois, all you have to do is eat a live cockroach. You have to gulp down the three-inch horned cockroach, live, and then you and three others will be able to hop to the front. It's really that simple.

Mock if you will, but there's no way "Quite Frankly" wouldn't be more entertaining if Stephen A. had to scarf down live bugs at the end of every episode.

Eat A Cockroach, Go To The Front Of The Line [Associated Press]

We mean no offense to Redskins fans, but when your owner is hosting Tom Cruise in his luxury box — when he's staying at your owner's house — we kind of think that maybe you deserve to lose.

Sorry: That's kind of what we think.

Cruise Family To Join Snyder At Redskins Game [The Washington Post]

(Photo from The Washington Post.)

So you know how Tom Cruise — he's an actor, been in a few movies, kind of squirrely, if you ask us — got fired by his studio recently and said he would find an independent financier for his future projects.

Well, he has his financier ... and you're never gonna believe who it is.

It's Redskins owner Daniel Snyder! No, seriously. Snyder, shown here reenacting Dakota Fanning's role in War Of The Worlds with Joe Gibbs as Cruise, has said he will give Cruise "less than $3 million annually to finance staff and office expenses."

We're not even sure where to start here. Though if Southeast Jerome converts to Scientology, we're gonna be pissed.

Tom Cruise Cuts Deal With New Group [Los Angeles Times]

(UPDATE: We actually prefer Defamer's take to ours.)

Anyway, good ole Washington Redskins skinflint Daniel Snyder has taken Fan Appreciation Day to an art form. August 5 is Fan Appreciation Day for the Redskins, and man, you get all kinds of goodies.

• A "free" invitation to the scrimmage. (Parking is $25, $75 for RVs.)
• A performance by the Redskins Marching Band.
• Vinny Cerrato addresses the fans!
• "Due to the structure of the scrimmage, there will not be any organized autograph sessions with players or coaches."

Man, Potomac region ... the Redskins sure do appreciate you!

Fan Appreciation Day [Redskins.com]

(By the way, here's a good story about how Snyder and former ESPN honcho Mark Shapiro are screwing up Six Flags.)

But we have to ask again: What kind of gimmicks will Shapiro bring to Six Flags (and, by extension, the Looney Tunes franchise)? Our guesses:

Daffy Duck and Bugs Bunny on Teammates?
Wile E. Coyote's "ticketing-time-bomb life."
"First and 10 With Elmer Fudd and Foghorn Leghorn."
"Quite Frankly With Yosemite Sam."

Shapiro To Leave ESPN October 1 [MediaWeek]