David Ortiz claims he's been drug tested "more than 80" times since 2004. Hardball Talk notes that this means one of two things: Either Ortiz is lying about how often he's been tested, or that Ortiz is tested so frequently because he has tested positive before. » 3/27/15 4:55pm Friday 4:55pm

David Ortiz Tracking Down A Pop Fly Could Take All Night

David Ortiz is a designated hitter who only really plays first base in interleague contests away from Fenway. Tonight, the Red Sox were in Cincinnati, which sports a decent amount of foul territory by first base. David Ortiz moved his legs, one in front of the other, at a higher rate of speed than normal, and… » 8/12/14 11:36pm 8/12/14 11:36pm

Chris Archer Continues To Be Annoying And Hypocritical About David Ortiz

Rays pitcher Chris Archer is not backing down from his dumb criticism of David Ortiz's bat flip from Sunday's game. And this time, like a true Salty Old Baseball Man, Archer is name-dropping poor Hank Aaron to make his point. » 7/29/14 10:05am 7/29/14 10:05am

David Ortiz Pissed Off The Rays Again

David Ortiz's three-run home run would be all the Red Sox needed in yesterday's 3-2 win over Tampa. But he couldn't have known that at the time—it was the third inning—yet Ortiz flipped his bat like he had just won a game, setting off yet another war of words with the Rays. » 7/28/14 9:17am 7/28/14 9:17am

Where Does David Ortiz Really Rank Among The All-Time Home Run Hitters?

David Ortiz hit his 450th home run late last month, moving him to 37th on the career home runs list. There's no doubt Ortiz has had a great career. But his are home runs in an era of home runs—and performance enhancers. He blends into his environment, that is to say. Since home runs were more infrequent in earlier… » 7/08/14 12:30pm 7/08/14 12:30pm

David Ortiz Is Furious About His Failed PED Test Coming Up Again

For whatever reason, David Ortiz hates it when you bring up that he tested positive for performance-enhancing drugs in 2003 (a fact confirmed by the union). The latest target of his ire: MLB Network hosts who declared he has received a "free pass" for his transgression. » 7/08/14 11:02am 7/08/14 11:02am

David Ortiz Thinks The Cubs Stink Because Of Day Games. Do They?

David Ortiz recently blamed the Cubs' consistent inability to win games on the team's penchant for scheduling day games. "When you come down to the Cubs' schedule it's a game-changer, believe it or not," Ortiz said. "They play so many day games at home and then they have to travel to another city and adjust themselves… » 7/03/14 11:46am 7/03/14 11:46am

David Ortiz Takes Off For First Before Ball Four Is Thrown

Some might say this was another dick move by Ortiz, walking to first before actually being walked. I would not! Last night's 2-1 Cubs win somehow took 3:35, and I am in favor of anything that makes Red Sox games shorter. » 7/02/14 9:34am 7/02/14 9:34am

David Ortiz Is Bitching About The Official Scorer Again

David Ortiz hit a game-tying home run in extra innings last night. In the clubhouse after the game, he didn't want to talk about that. He wanted to complain about a seventh-inning ground ball that glanced off the glove of first-baseman Joe Mauer and was ruled an error. » 6/19/14 5:22pm 6/19/14 5:22pm

David Price Hits Two, Stays In Game As Most Of Boston Is Ejected

The Red Sox and Rays cleared the benches last night which, by itself, is barely worth mentioning but then someone put a microphone in front of David Ortiz's face after the game. Ortiz was not very happy with Tampa's ace David Price, who plunked him with the very first pitch Ortiz saw since hitting two home runs off… » 5/31/14 3:20pm 5/31/14 3:20pm

Twins Fan Gives Finger To Little Girl Who Won't Throw Back HR Ball…

This is from Wednesday's game, a David Ortiz home run that was retrieved by a girl in the first row. When the girl made it clear she had no intentions of tossing the ball back onto the field, the woman in red let the girl know to her face what she thought of that decision. » 5/16/14 9:05am 5/16/14 9:05am

Thank God For David Ortiz

Yu Darvish was perfect through the seventh inning against the Red Sox last night until David Ortiz hit a routine pop-up into shallow right field. It fell between Alex Rios and Rougned Odor and was officially ruled an error, thus preserving a no-hitter. For two innings the baseball world sat on the precipice of a … » 5/10/14 10:25am 5/10/14 10:25am

What If All Baseball Players Were Fat?

Upon several viewings of Bartolo Colon's hilarious plate appearances, the Deadspin staff discussed what baseball would be like if every player looked like the husky Mets hurler. Or, really, just fat. So here's some recent MLB highlights where we made all the baseball players fat. Video's above, GIFs are below. » 4/25/14 12:10pm 4/25/14 12:10pm

David Ortiz Goes On Slowest Home Run Trot On Record

Thanks to our friends at Tater Trot Tracker, who have been timing home run trots for years now, we know that nobody takes his time getting around the bases quite like David Ortiz does. » 4/10/14 10:53am 4/10/14 10:53am

David Ortiz: "Fuck Them. I'm Tired Of Hearing Them Talk Shit"

Red Sox designated hitter/style icon David Ortiz, who's in the last year of his contract and coming off his best regular season since his mid-aughts prime and an all-time postseason run, has made it clear this winter that he wants money. The world's response has mainly been, "Well, the Red Sox should give him money."… » 2/18/14 4:11pm 2/18/14 4:11pm

David Ortiz Films Interview With Tiny-Ass Dog On His Lap

Relive some of David Ortiz's best moments this year—"this is our fucking city," the iconic cop-celebrated home run in Game 2 of the ALCS and so much more—with quick cuts to David Ortiz sitting in a wood-panelled room with a tiny-ass dog on his lap. Since dogs that small are technically cats anyway, go right ahead and… » 1/27/14 9:40pm 1/27/14 9:40pm

David Ortiz Rocks WWE Belt During Championship Parade

Rings are cool and all but wouldn't every sport be improved by handing out belts instead? David Ortiz thinks so, which is why he showed up to today's victory parade showing off that bad boy. » 11/02/13 6:25pm 11/02/13 6:25pm

Where Does David Ortiz Rank Among The Best World Series Hitters Ever?

Over the last five games, David Ortiz has hit .733/.750/1.267. This would be a crazy line for any stretch of the season, much less the fucking World Series, and it's brought his career line in the Fall Classic up to .465/.556/.814, which is good enough—the best of any hitter with at least 50 plate appearances—to back… » 10/30/13 1:34pm 10/30/13 1:34pm