Since the great Comment Redesign of Aught-Eight, there has been a curious grayed-out option skulking down around the bottom of every post. "Coming soon: comment using your Facebook account," it says. Today, soon has arrived. You already spend half your workday stalking people on Facebook, you might as well combine it with your other major productivity-killing activity (that'd be Deadspin, slow kids). Instead of logging into Deadspin with a username or email address, you can use your Facebook login information and your comment will automatically be approved. No longer will the tyranny of the combudsman keep you from making hilarious one-liners about the sports-related news of the day!

Did I mention there'd be a catch? Because there's always a catch. Your automatically-approved comments will appear under your real name with a link to your Facebook profile. Make fun of Caitlin Davis and her Marine boyfriend can track you down to discuss your differences over tea (as soon as he, you know, gets out of Iraq and whatnot). Make fun of Mrs. Wilfork and, well, I shudder to think what might become of you. You will also be subject to the harsh verbal barbs of the Deadspin commentariat, a fate worse than...something, I'm sure.

Of course, with freedom comes responsibility. The same commenting rules we discussed on Wednesday are still in effect, and I won't hesitate to use the velvety banhammer if necessary. Additionally, if you the Deadspin reader should see a comment that is out of bounds even for Deadspin, please bring it to my attention via email and I will review it.

Let's all give the new commenters a hearty Deadspin welcome, shall we? This oughta be fun.

With a new bouncer working the door here, now would be a good time to review the guidelines for commenting on Deadspin. As the site has changed, so have the commenters, by which I mean, there are a metric fuckton more of them now than there used to be, and not all of them are funny. And that's OK. Not everyone can be the next Big Daddy Balls, nor should everyone try. So, with those things in mind, here are the revised guidelines for Deadspin commenting:

1) Be funny.
2) At least be interesting.
3) Don't be not funny and not interesting.
4) Don't be a dick, unless you're being funny and/or interesting. This is especially true regarding any features or columns you find uninteresting. Sexism isn't funny unless it's being handled by the pros.
5) All other rules and prohibitions remain in effect until further notice.

With that unpleasantness out of the way, I'd also like to introduce the Deadspin Customer Service hotline. I am here to make your Deadspin-reading experience as painless as possible. Comments not showing up? Send me an email. Wondering why your account wasn't approved? Send me an email. Question about a site redesign? Send me an email. Need a good recipe for homemade beef jerky marinade? Send me an email. In other words, I'm here to help with any Deadspin or jerky-related questions you may have - until my job is outsourced to Bangalore, anyway. I can't guarantee my answer will make you happy or even be remotely correct, but I can guarantee you an answer.

Thank you for choosing Deadspin and have a great day.

(Editor's note: This is not the big change that I referenced on Friday that some of you — okay Artie Fufkin and 44 in a Row — picked up on. No, you'll know when that happens. Then you can yell at Pete. I'm told that whole thing has been "delayed.")