USMNT Felled By Hat-Trick Hero Nicklas Bendtner, Who Still Sucks

For the first time this year—at least the first time we'd like to remember—a fit and strong USMNT squad got some run. The opponent was Denmark, stiff competition to be sure. So while USMNT fans could've justifiably been cautiously pleased with the 2-1 lead our boys took into the final 10 minutes of the game, it's… » 3/25/15 5:54pm Wednesday 5:54pm

Arsenal Striker Nicklas Bendtner Rubbed His Dick On A Taxi Tuesday

While Arsenal were in Germany being ousted by FC Bayern in the Champions League on Tuesday, Gunners striker Nicklas Bendtner was getting shithoused in Denmark. He got so smashed, according to reports, that he threatened a cab driver, pulled out his cock, and humped the car. The Telegraph has more: » 3/13/14 2:02pm 3/13/14 2:02pm

To UEFA, Wrong Underwear Far Worse Than Fan Racism

Know this: UEFA is very protective of its sponsors. (Here are the Euro 2012 sponsors, soulless corporations all, and you should avoid their products for the remainder of the tournament. Except possibly Ukrsotsbank PJSC.) Paddy Power, the Irish bookmaker, is just as corporate and just as interested in getting your… » 6/18/12 3:25pm 6/18/12 3:25pm

As Good As It Feels, Coaches Probably Shouldn't Hit Reporters

Randers FC had a rough season, just barely escaping being relegated from the Danish Superliga. So it's inevitable that the media wanted to talk to manager Ove Christensen, and also inevitable that Christensen wouldn't want to talk. » 4/29/11 10:30am 4/29/11 10:30am

Dennis Rommedahl Scores An Absolute Rocket

It may have escaped your attention, what with Wales and England's titanic battle at the Millennium Stadium being so tight and tense, but Norway played Denmark at the weekend and the score finished 1-1. BOOORING! » 3/28/11 6:15pm 3/28/11 6:15pm

World Cup Open Thread: Cameroon-Netherlands; Denmark-Japan

Cameroon is playing for pride and the Danes must win if they want to advance. Talk about the different nations' cuisine and follow the game action in the comments below. » 6/24/10 2:30pm 6/24/10 2:30pm

World Cup Open Thread: Netherlands-Denmark

Day 4 kicks off with The Flying Dutchpersons taking on the very punny Olsen's Eleven while people the world over incorrectly point out which country is which on a map. Follow the consonant-filled action below. » 6/14/10 7:30am 6/14/10 7:30am

It's Probably Not Smart For This Guy To Show His Face In Esbjerg…

Over the weekend, a fan of Denmark's soccer team sprinted on the field and attacked a referee after a call went again the Danes. That's bad enough, but the real problem was that Denmark had rallied back from a three-goal deficit to the tie the game ... and after the attack, the referee abandoned the game. That's… » 6/05/07 2:00pm 6/05/07 2:00pm

The Danes Like To Punch

If the Second War of Schleswig taught us anything, it's that the Danish lack problem-solving skills. Yesterday, during a Euro 2008 qualifier, a Danish player punched a Swedish player in the stomach, and was, of course, red-carded and sent off. Apparently feeling like it should be perfectly legal to punch other… » 6/03/07 1:30pm 6/03/07 1:30pm